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Admytica — Childhood Dreams
Published: 2004-10-20 20:08:09 +0000 UTC; Views: 178; Favourites: 22; Downloads: 8
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Description If you think that rain is only water
That falls to ground when the sky is grey
If you think that hunt is only slaughter
A cruel one brutally murdering innocent prey
If you believe the sun is just a ball
That makes the evenings bright and summer mild
Then, my friend, you’ve not grown up at all
And in your soul and mind you’re still a child.

If you can draw a rainbow with seven colours
And paint the sky clear blue on the top of a sheet
If you are rich when all you have is two dollars
And find that every berry does taste sweet
If you can play alone in the grassy meadow
And see castles where I see only sand
Then, my love, you’ve not yet touched the shadow
And still see all the wonders of the land

I lost my will to draw as I grew older
And I’ve become afraid to be alone
Today I find the world is growing colder
And I dare not do anything on my own
I’ve become afraid of those around me
Afraid of getting anything not right
But you, my dear, see the world as it should be
For you, the sun is always shining bright

Teach me how to draw with simple colours
Show me all your castles in the sand
Prove that I am rich with seven dollars
Guide me through the wonders of the land
Then maybe I will cease to be so frightened
Maybe I will dare to walk alone
Then through you, my child, my world has brightened
And maybe I can be a child, but grown.
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Comments: 7

Tuishimi [2005-06-13 23:21:08 +0000 UTC]

Had to go to your first, posted poem. I love what the poem says. I don't know it it is what you were aiming for but you have a number of lines that are Iambic and then a mix of Dactyl as well. So there is a rhythm, but sometimes it is lost in the line length. The last two stanzas are very nice and I felt emotion welling up quickly... before I squelched it.

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Admytica In reply to Tuishimi [2005-06-14 09:27:52 +0000 UTC]

hey, thanks I think there were parts of this that I wanted to show off, certain lines I wanted in it, and I just fitted the rest two those lines... that's why it'a s bit mixed. I think I would've written it differently if I had written it today. but I like it nonetheless And I'm glad you do too!

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Libahunt [2004-10-21 20:35:30 +0000 UTC]

This is simply wonderful. Gonna say something more when I'm a bit more awake

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Luvya9876 [2004-10-21 07:21:14 +0000 UTC]

I realized I had welcomed you to DA but I didn't actually look at your gallery! so sorry. I like this poem a lot! very vivid and hits a person on such an emotional level. Great job!

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Admytica In reply to Luvya9876 [2004-10-21 11:20:34 +0000 UTC]

hehe, thanks, both of you I actually don't think this poem was out when you visited, because it was the last thing I did before I logged off

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Luvya9876 In reply to Admytica [2004-10-21 17:47:53 +0000 UTC]

*whew*

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MisterIngo [2004-10-20 20:11:53 +0000 UTC]

Dette var kjempebra!
*translator* This was great!*

God natt!
*good night*

Mister Ingo

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