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Kathryn303 [2010-01-27 03:00:41 +0000 UTC]

I agree with all of the above, but I just wanted to add a little bit more critique.

The movement is very lovely in this picture, but I think you could bring it to a whole new level with the addition of a background. A background doesn't have to be anything fancy...even something simple can make a heck of a lot of difference.

I'd suggest doing a middle-ground shading all over the background after sketching out the lines of the main drawing. Go over everything, even the drawing with this middle shade. [link] you can see in the last row of this chart, the middle shade between white and black would be about 9. So if you shaded everything this, then when you started drawing the penguin you can shade even darker and then erase to make lighter parts, I think this would help greatly with your contrast.
And then you could add some shading to the background to hint at a light source (ie. light coming in from the top so the top of the background fading into a darker shade at the bottom) but if you do this, you have to make sure that your light source in the background matches the light source coming onto your figure, or penguin in this case.

And then I just had an idea to add some more movement to the picture. I think that adding some bubbles would help. You can see that when the penquin moves, it creates some bubbles behind it from movement. [link]

Well, I hope I helped somewhat with my advice.

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Farewell-Spring [2010-01-24 13:08:14 +0000 UTC]

First, I would like to ask one thing, did you use a reference for your image?

Secondly, I like to say that anatomy is really well done and accurate, I did have to do a little google search myself to find some photos to compare to and your anatomy of the penguin is quite nice and the movement and flow of the body is also very nice.

I believe that what takes away from your work is the lack of different tones of shading, overall there seems like there are only around 2 to 3 different shades, I suggest adding even more shades and darker tones, try blending things from the lighter to the darker shade.

Another thing I wanted to comment on is the fact that I can clearly see how pencil lines are moving overal the picture, when you use pencils to do your art, it should be blended nicely so that the viewer cannot see pencil lines all over the picture. There are some pretty nice tutorials here in dA about how to shade and blend your work more nicely, one I can suggest is this one: [link] it has really easy to follow steps and it's of great help.

Hope my critic was helpful. Keep it up!

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meihua [2010-01-21 22:13:54 +0000 UTC]

I think you need to have more contrast, and a background would help as well

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Altheau [2010-01-21 09:15:06 +0000 UTC]

I think this piece has great form and flow.

not sure if it is the scan quality is a problem or not, but i would also look at preserving the white highlight in the eye more. And I agree with DeblendDe more black, especially in the eye.

I am not sure if you are looking for a more realistic look (I like it as is as well) but i would try to not outline the white and shade the white instead to define it.

I would consider sharpening your pencils more and layering black to get dark colours, it will take longer but you will get a nicer finish and stroner blacks without having to really push hard on your pencils

Lovely flow and a natural looking pose I really like it!

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DeblendDe [2010-01-19 20:15:02 +0000 UTC]

I saw you requested some critique: this is what popped up in my mind:
I think the drawing needs a little more black: It will give more depth, strength and contrast. I see you're using a 6b, that should draw really black. You've got the shape, the proportions and the movement of the penguin really well.
I hope it helped a little...

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