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Description
I've been grieving the recent loss of an important friendship which has had an immensely negative effect on my mental health, but the more I think about it the more I realize that no matter how badly I want things to work out I can't force things. I can't make someone value me, make time for me, respect me, treat me right. I can't wait around forever for them to change, be consistent in my life, or make better life decisions. I can't exorcise their demons for them. I have my own demons to exorcise. And while letting go, giving up, and moving on is hard and painful, it's been even more painful trying to hold on. I'm gonna work though the grief in therapy and am requesting weekly sessions now. I'll have to stop buying weed in order to afford it cuz idk what else I can do. And if my dear ex friend somehow ends up seeing this I just want you to know I have no ill feelings towards you, I wish you the best, & I'll always care for you ~from a distance~. Thank you for being my friend and thank you to all my current friends who have stuck by me through all the hard times. I'm really hoping things get better soon cuz I'm having a really hard time but I'm doing all I can to improve my condition.

Description
I've been grieving the recent loss of an important friendship which has had an immensely negative effect on my mental health, but the more I think about it the more I realize that no matter how badly I want things to work out I can't force things. I can't make someone value me, make time for me, respect me, treat me right. I can't wait around forever for them to change, be consistent in my life, or make better life decisions. I can't exorcise their demons for them. I have my own demons to exorcise. And while letting go, giving up, and moving on is hard and painful, it's been even more painful trying to hold on. I'm gonna work though the grief in therapy and am requesting weekly sessions now. I'll have to stop buying weed in order to afford it cuz idk what else I can do. And if my dear ex friend somehow ends up seeing this I just want you to know I have no ill feelings towards you, I wish you the best, & I'll always care for you ~from a distance~. Thank you for being my friend and thank you to all my current friends who have stuck by me through all the hard times. I'm really hoping things get better soon cuz I'm having a really hard time but I'm doing all I can to improve my condition.