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Description
PLEASE NOTE: These are all jokes, meant to make you laugh.
All text is (c) Me

1. You trip in the parking lot on the first day~
2. The bus never comes and you starve.
3. Your running across the street to catch the bus and it hits you.
4. The bus flies off a cliff.
5. Someone on the bus is smuggling a gun.
6. You just continuously drive until you die of starvation.
7. The bus doors close on you.
8. The steering wheel breaks off.
9. Your trip off the bus.
10. The bus driver trips you off the bus.
11. The bus explodes.
12. The specific seat your sitting in explodes.
13. The school gets blasted sky-high and your caught in the exhaust.
14. The office ladies are spies and hack you to pieces.
15. Your backpack explodes.
16. Your accidentally walk into a janitorial closed and the janitor kills you.
17. You find the basement and it's actually a pit of electric eels.
18. Your have an epiphany and your head explodes.
19. Your schedule explodes.
20. A senior eats you.
21. A senior pushes you down the stairs.
22. You run into a wall and it crumbles on you.
23. I punch you to hard when I see a VW beetle.
24. Your teeth fall out and you can't eat and starve.
25. A senior chokes you.
26. You walk into a calculus classroom and your head explodes.
27. A stray pair of scissors flies through the air and stabs you.
28. You die of sadness because all your friends have a different lunch period.
29. You read 'People' and die of confusion.
30. You melt on your way to the portables because it's raining.
31. You melt anyway.
32. A [mathematical] compass is thrown at you.
33. Your Geometry teacher is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
34. Someone slits your throat with a protractor.
35. You are stabbed with a pencil.
36. The bell is too loud and your ears start bleeding, then you die of blood loss.
37. A senior eats the portable your in.
38. A senior eats the classroom your in.
39. You attempt to eat a class but can't digest it.
40. You succeed in eating a class then explode.
41. You get run over [by people] during passing period.
42. You choke trying to put your gym clothes on.
43. A senior stuffs you in your gym locker.
44. Your head gets caught in a door and your stuck forever.
45. A ball hits you in the head.
46. You fall of a medicine ball and get a concussion.
47. Your forced to run forever.
48. Your crayon breaks and you die of frustration.
49. Your gym coach is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
50. Your geography teacher is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
51. You glue your mouth shut on accident.
52. A senior throws a desk at you.
53. Someone else thows a desk at you.
54. You spend so much time staring at a map of Asia that you think your there and die of confusion.
55. The school crumbles on you.
56. You forget your lunch for 2 weeks and die of starvation.
57. You eat too much for lunch.
58. You spend all day wondering and looking for somewhere to sit and die of exhaustion.
59. You pull one too many all-nighters.
60. A drunk driver drives through the school and hits you.
61. A senior stuffs your food in your mouth to fast.
62. A plastic knife stabs you.
63. I'm a spy at lunch and hack you to pieces.
64. You get hit by a scalpel while dissecting in biology.
65. You die of confusion while learning about punnet squares.
66. The sink sprays to hot and you burn your hands off.
67. A senior flushes you down the toilet.
68. You get a 69 on the final and hang yourself.
69. A senior throws you out the window.
70. You bang your head against a desk repeatedly.
71. Someone annoys you to death.
72. Your backpack weighs you down. The stairs.
73. Someone throws a book at you.
74. A senior thros a book at you.
75. Your english teacher is a spy and hack you to pieces.
76. Romeo comes out of the book and you die of shock.
77. Jack comes out of 'Lord of the Flies' and you die of fear.
78. You die of boredom in Latin.
79. You kill your Latin teacher and get sent to the electric chair.
80. You kill your Latin teacher and get hung.
81. You jump out a window during Latin.
82. You destroy the entire Latin classroom, are forced to pay for it, go bankrupt, and starve.
83. You go into the fetal position and die of starvation.
84. Your Band/Orchestra instrument explodes.
85. Your Music Director is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
86. Your music stand explodes.
87. Your band director announces your going to Chicago and you die of fear. ((NOTE: A reference to another one of these that is unposted, '99 ways to die on a school band-sponsered trip to Chicago.))
88. You die of exhaustion after your first day.
89. You implode.
90. You eat a freshmen and get eaten.
91. You jump into a water-filled pit and get electicuted because of the electrical outlet in the pit.
92. Salvius comes and eats you. ((NOTE: A reference to a character in the Latin book that we mistranslated as a cannibal.))
93. You get transported back to Pompeii and die by Vesuvius.
94. You jump off the top of the school.
95. Your invisible flying car crashes.
96. Your invisible flying car falls out of a tree while your in it.
97. The school implodes into a bottomless black hole.
98. You die of laughter [from this paper.]
99. All of these things happen at once.

Description
PLEASE NOTE: These are all jokes, meant to make you laugh.
All text is (c) Me

1. You trip in the parking lot on the first day~
2. The bus never comes and you starve.
3. Your running across the street to catch the bus and it hits you.
4. The bus flies off a cliff.
5. Someone on the bus is smuggling a gun.
6. You just continuously drive until you die of starvation.
7. The bus doors close on you.
8. The steering wheel breaks off.
9. Your trip off the bus.
10. The bus driver trips you off the bus.
11. The bus explodes.
12. The specific seat your sitting in explodes.
13. The school gets blasted sky-high and your caught in the exhaust.
14. The office ladies are spies and hack you to pieces.
15. Your backpack explodes.
16. Your accidentally walk into a janitorial closed and the janitor kills you.
17. You find the basement and it's actually a pit of electric eels.
18. Your have an epiphany and your head explodes.
19. Your schedule explodes.
20. A senior eats you.
21. A senior pushes you down the stairs.
22. You run into a wall and it crumbles on you.
23. I punch you to hard when I see a VW beetle.
24. Your teeth fall out and you can't eat and starve.
25. A senior chokes you.
26. You walk into a calculus classroom and your head explodes.
27. A stray pair of scissors flies through the air and stabs you.
28. You die of sadness because all your friends have a different lunch period.
29. You read 'People' and die of confusion.
30. You melt on your way to the portables because it's raining.
31. You melt anyway.
32. A [mathematical] compass is thrown at you.
33. Your Geometry teacher is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
34. Someone slits your throat with a protractor.
35. You are stabbed with a pencil.
36. The bell is too loud and your ears start bleeding, then you die of blood loss.
37. A senior eats the portable your in.
38. A senior eats the classroom your in.
39. You attempt to eat a class but can't digest it.
40. You succeed in eating a class then explode.
41. You get run over [by people] during passing period.
42. You choke trying to put your gym clothes on.
43. A senior stuffs you in your gym locker.
44. Your head gets caught in a door and your stuck forever.
45. A ball hits you in the head.
46. You fall of a medicine ball and get a concussion.
47. Your forced to run forever.
48. Your crayon breaks and you die of frustration.
49. Your gym coach is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
50. Your geography teacher is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
51. You glue your mouth shut on accident.
52. A senior throws a desk at you.
53. Someone else thows a desk at you.
54. You spend so much time staring at a map of Asia that you think your there and die of confusion.
55. The school crumbles on you.
56. You forget your lunch for 2 weeks and die of starvation.
57. You eat too much for lunch.
58. You spend all day wondering and looking for somewhere to sit and die of exhaustion.
59. You pull one too many all-nighters.
60. A drunk driver drives through the school and hits you.
61. A senior stuffs your food in your mouth to fast.
62. A plastic knife stabs you.
63. I'm a spy at lunch and hack you to pieces.
64. You get hit by a scalpel while dissecting in biology.
65. You die of confusion while learning about punnet squares.
66. The sink sprays to hot and you burn your hands off.
67. A senior flushes you down the toilet.
68. You get a 69 on the final and hang yourself.
69. A senior throws you out the window.
70. You bang your head against a desk repeatedly.
71. Someone annoys you to death.
72. Your backpack weighs you down. The stairs.
73. Someone throws a book at you.
74. A senior thros a book at you.
75. Your english teacher is a spy and hack you to pieces.
76. Romeo comes out of the book and you die of shock.
77. Jack comes out of 'Lord of the Flies' and you die of fear.
78. You die of boredom in Latin.
79. You kill your Latin teacher and get sent to the electric chair.
80. You kill your Latin teacher and get hung.
81. You jump out a window during Latin.
82. You destroy the entire Latin classroom, are forced to pay for it, go bankrupt, and starve.
83. You go into the fetal position and die of starvation.
84. Your Band/Orchestra instrument explodes.
85. Your Music Director is a spy and hacks you to pieces.
86. Your music stand explodes.
87. Your band director announces your going to Chicago and you die of fear. ((NOTE: A reference to another one of these that is unposted, '99 ways to die on a school band-sponsered trip to Chicago.))
88. You die of exhaustion after your first day.
89. You implode.
90. You eat a freshmen and get eaten.
91. You jump into a water-filled pit and get electicuted because of the electrical outlet in the pit.
92. Salvius comes and eats you. ((NOTE: A reference to a character in the Latin book that we mistranslated as a cannibal.))
93. You get transported back to Pompeii and die by Vesuvius.
94. You jump off the top of the school.
95. Your invisible flying car crashes.
96. Your invisible flying car falls out of a tree while your in it.
97. The school implodes into a bottomless black hole.
98. You die of laughter [from this paper.]
99. All of these things happen at once.