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ash-interrupted — Don't Tell Me You Know...
Published: 2004-08-04 12:14:24 +0000 UTC; Views: 1886; Favourites: 27; Downloads: 78
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Description
Don't Tell Me You Know What It's LikeYou don't know what it's like
so don't say that you do
you say that we're alike
but I know it isn't true
don't tell me not to be this way
don't tell me not to cry
don't tell me it will be okay
don't say I need to try
don't tell me that you understand
don't tell me that you care
don't say how immature I am
or that life just isn't fair
I'm so tired of this life
of wishing and praying constantly
that I leave this knife
and soon they find what's wrong with me
I know there's something not right in my head
when I never want to leave my bed
you don't know what it's like to feel torn apart
to feel like someone cut out your beating heart
you don't know what it's like
to go through everyday
trying not to kill yourself,
trying not to be this way
I'm so sick of all these pills
none of them will work
on and off so many kinds
it's only made me worse
don't tell me I'll grow out of this
when it's already been nine years
don't tell me when I cry
that I'm not crying real tears
don't tell me how or what to think
don't tell me how to act or be
dont' tell me I'll get through this
and don't say that you're here for me
'cause you fucking know as well as me
everyone gives up eventually
don't tell me I won't fade away
don't tell me that I'm wrong
don't tell me not to think this way
I know I don't belong
don't tell me not to be afraid
don't tell me to be strong
don't tell me that I must be brave
I have been all along
-ashley carver
Related content
Comments: 41
-------speechless---------
*tries to find the right words for this BRILLIANT poem*
*fails*
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i really like this...and i can relate to it...wow...i love it..definitely a fav for me!
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Thank you
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I love the way it flows. It is a bit too harsh for poetry, as someone mentioned - no imagery - but it makes the poem all the more stronger and more powerful. I find it a bit hard to write poems with a certain rythm, but you have suceeded very well. And the massage comes through forcefully. Beautifully written. Now I am anspired to go write something myself too. Thanks for sharing
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i love the way all your emotions seem to be flying around your head and you try to catch few of them and glue them to some paper. but still they run around and you seem actually surprised of what it turned out to be, in the end.
anyway, this is beautiful too.
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I really like the last line. I think it ties everything up perfectly. Good work dear.
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Weird that so many people are saying they relate to a poem that begins "You don't know what it's like
so don't say that you do."
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What's weird is the number of faves it has.
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I would have said that, but I promised myself not to outright insult people's work like that.
Thanks for doing it for me
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This needs a lot of work. If you want me to go into detail and critique you, just say so in reply.
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no that's okay, I'm quite happy with how it is
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I am going to preface my comments by saying that I am trying to help you, not flame you. dA is about artists helping artists become better at their craft through critique. I am critiquing you because your main page indicates to me that you consider yourself a writer.
That said, and I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, I don't see anything particularly interesting or original here. This is a list of emotions & experiences typical of high school/youth. I realize that said emotions are strong and need to be expressed in some way, but there is a difference between journaling in verse and actually writing poetry. There is no imagery here, there is no metaphor; you are purely telling us about this experience instead of showing us. Poetry is the art of communicating ideas and emotions to the reader without spelling it out for them. We use sensation, colour, metaphor, imagery and so on to present the idea and make the reader feel it.
Have you considered trying an exercise in imagery? There's a ton of symbolic imagery out there for every type of emotion, though you have to watch for the cliched ones (knives, blood, wrist-slitting etc). Try using imagery and invent a metaphor for what you're feeling. It tends to be a better release than just telling in verse because it helps you think about what you're feeling, and chances are you'll come up with something more interesting to read.
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Damn you! I was all happy before I read this now I've gone all dark and reflective
'cause you fucking know as well as me
everyone gives up eventually'
So very true.
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wow reallllyyyy love it!!! i totally agree, ESPECIALLY with the phrase u used:
"and don't say that you're here for me
'cause you fucking know as well as me
everyone gives up eventually"
CUZ THATS SOOOOOOO FUCKEN TRUE!!!!
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Wow, thats ace. I hate people saying all those things to me too.
It really doesnt help.
Great poem, the flow is perfect.
*hugs*
Phil xxx
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great poem. i love it cuz i can actually relate to it unlike a lot of other poems
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