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Description
Playlist: Porcupine Tree - I drive the hearse
...
"Silence is another way, of saying what I want to say."
This phrase has been haunting me for a while now.
...
Shutting up at the right time is a refined skill that I admire in other people but I have not yet mastered it myself.
I started out this life believing I was an introvert, being quiet, but it didn't serve me well. I became utterly frustrated and feeling irrelevant.
The thing is, regular people don't understand me when I speak freely.
What I say is often too complicated. Then they laugh of frown. Sometimes I don't care about further explanation and I end up feeling like a clown, not taken seriously. Other times I do explain myself and end up feeling surrounded by idiots.
I say the things they don't want to hear, but they need to. Then I feel their energy shift to insecurity, or fear. And then comes the self-doubt that makes me feel arrogant and selfish.
...
Words are powerful. I use them to fight this torment of being constantly misunderstood. But are they really necessary?
In fact it makes me not alone, yet very lonely.
How else can I find my tribe?

Description
Playlist: Porcupine Tree - I drive the hearse
...
"Silence is another way, of saying what I want to say."
This phrase has been haunting me for a while now.
...
Shutting up at the right time is a refined skill that I admire in other people but I have not yet mastered it myself.
I started out this life believing I was an introvert, being quiet, but it didn't serve me well. I became utterly frustrated and feeling irrelevant.
The thing is, regular people don't understand me when I speak freely.
What I say is often too complicated. Then they laugh of frown. Sometimes I don't care about further explanation and I end up feeling like a clown, not taken seriously. Other times I do explain myself and end up feeling surrounded by idiots.
I say the things they don't want to hear, but they need to. Then I feel their energy shift to insecurity, or fear. And then comes the self-doubt that makes me feel arrogant and selfish.
...
Words are powerful. I use them to fight this torment of being constantly misunderstood. But are they really necessary?
In fact it makes me not alone, yet very lonely.
How else can I find my tribe?