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Billm2n — You Live A Meaningless Existence.
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Published: 2012-03-12 21:49:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 250; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 34
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Description
It is so fun looking at those who party every weekendBitch I hope you get raped by the guy you thought was your best friend
You are nothing but roadside trash
Your pussy is something anyone with kind words could smash
Guys treat you like shit because you let them
Woman like you are simply just easy targets for men
Good news though you may end up on 16 and pregnant
Where deadbeat dads, and woman with daddy issues run rampant
I laugh when you cry, and wish for you to suffer
I hope your hardships become more frequent, and tougher
The thought of you getting pregnant, and left to die
It's like the greatest, and most enthralling natural high
So keep on being with dudes who think swag is gangster
But know this that you will never matter
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Comments: 21
Is this attacking some one that you know?
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I honestly am not trying to be rude, but it seems you keep writing the same thing again and again, is that a big problem where you live or something? But I'm not complaining, they are very good poems. And for what the other commenter said, I disagree, your poems are master pieces, every piece of art is a master piece in its own way
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Yeah I just have a strong feeling on the subject I apologize for the staleness lately. I will be uploading at least 3 poems later all based on completely different subjects, thank you for all the support it means a lot. <3 Lastly if there is something you want me to write about just note me or something I am currently working on writing a poem consisting of the subject you spoke about before.
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No, it isn't stale, you use different terms and styles each time. And another idea would be an anti-hate poem? I'm working on one myself right now
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Can't wait to see what you do with random ideas
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I swear, you are better then me when it comes to imagination, and I am famous at my school for imagination
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Also timeout I just checked my gallery, and the last poem that was remotely of the same subject matter was about 4 poems ago then the one before that was about 13 poems back. :/
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I'm entitled to my own (often warped) opinion, and I believe this holds no literary value whatsoever. Anybody can rhyme two words together and write a couplet, but that doesn't mean they have created a master work of art, the other words are important too. There is no flow in this poem, the words seem clunky and the sentences seem poorly formed. There is also no real emotive language, writing "I hope you die lol" would be just as effective as any line you have written here. I read to the end, hoping for a clever twist near the end, but no such twist came. I also disagree with what you are trying to say, the existence of somebody who enjoys going outside is no less meaningless than the existence of somebody who coops up in their room to write about how meaningless everybody else is. Perhaps it's just the depressive in me, but nobody can really justify any kind of meaning in anything or anyone. Best of luck for the future, remember to go over every poem more than once, check out other poets, and experiment with new styles.
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o.o I didn't write this hoping for some literary achievement award I hope you realize this. Also I laughed so hard while reading your comment I feel like I have achieved what I wanted to achieve by writing this as I do with all of my poems, I love when people state their opinions about them, get mad, and get butthurt about them. Seeing someone comment so harshly just says that this did hit home for you in some way, shape, or form.
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I expected an angry reply, and I expected the usual teen-response of "I meant to do this hahahaha", but I am not an angry person and my comment was not meant to sound harsh at all. I don't see how this poem would "him home" for me in any way, because I am not the sort of person described in the poem. I am much of an introvert.
Nobody starts off with a "literary achievement award" placed easily in their grasp. I don't claim to be the archangel of poetry, but I used to be a lot worse than I am now. The sole reason that I improved was that I opened myself to critique.
The best words of advice that anybody ever gave to me were not "Great poem!", they were "You can do better".
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[link] If you want to see a poem I am really proud of check this one out.
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