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Bugeye27 — Detention [NSFW]
Published: 2012-05-10 22:31:05 +0000 UTC; Views: 76; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 1
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Description        It was late at night in a two story school, and three students, Harry, Clair and Chris, were in detention class for not doing their homework for the past week. The only way to get out of class was to finish the homework that was assigned. They were to stay in the class regardless of what time it is.
       Harry, who was into scary stories, got bored and decided to tell one of his scary stories to the other two. The other two thought it was alright because the teacher who was supposed to be supervising them fell asleep, and they've been working for a good 6 hours. So they listened to Harry's story. The story involved a girl who drowned in the pond near the school. He mentioned details about the girl, what she was like, why she was at school at the time and so forth. After a couple minutes of storytelling, they all decided to get back to work.
       Another half hour of work and all three of them finished. However the teacher is still asleep. They all decided to wake him up. Chris walked up to the sleeping teacher and moved him a few times. No answer. They needed him to wake up because he has the keys to the room, and the door is locked. After multiple failed attempts to wake him up, Clair decided to just take the keys and unlock the door themselves. After doing that, they walked through the dark halls of the school, and out the front door. Then Harry stopped and told the other two that he needs to use the bathroom. So they waited for him outside the front doors of the school.
       Nearly 15 minutes passed and Harry hasn't come back yet. Clair and Chris got worried. So together, they walked the dark halls of the school to the nearest boy's bathroom. Upon arriving there, Chris told Clair to wait outside, being a girl and all. As he entered, he didn't see anything suspicious, and saw one bathroom stall that is the only one closed. Chris assumes Harry is in that stall. He knocked on it and asked if everything is alright. However as he knocked, he saw from the bottom a red chunk of flesh fell from the door. Chris got scared of what awaited him on the other side of that door. He closed his eyes and slowly he opened the stall doors. He opened his eyes only to see nothing pretty. What he saw was Harry sitting on the toilet seat, pants down, with a hole on his chest. Harry's eyes and mouth were open in fear. Blood was sprayed on the stall walls, and it's still fresh. The organs that stuck to the wall slowly slid down to the stalls bottom edge. The sight was so unbearable that Chris quickly left the stall and started puking in the sink. After he calmed down a bit, he took out his cell phone and took a picture of the now dead Harry.
       Clair saw Chris came back and he showed her a photo of what he saw. After seeing the picture, she cried, felt sick, and ran to the closest trash can to puke in. She was absolutely disgusted. Then the thought occurred to both of them. What if the person who did "that" to Harry is still here? After the sudden thought, Clair and Chris ran as fast as they could out of the school building, and into the forest. The school was surrounded with trees, there's no path that leads the way out.
       Chris, being the athlete he is, outran Clair to the point that Clair can't see him behind the trees. Sure they're running for their life, but Clair gets lost in the forest without any friends around to be with. Clair eventually lost her stamina and started walking to regain some of her energy. Not long after, she heard a scream not far from where she is. Clair decided to follow the sound hoping she can get to Chris. She found Chris eventually, but not in a way she wants to. Chris has been cut in half. His organs were chopped to small pieces. Blood was sprayed within a 2 meter radius. His eyes and mouth were wide open in fear. Clair was really scared. She wanted to cry. But she remembers that her life was on the line. She regained some of her courage and continued running.
       She didn't know where she was running, but after a while, she found herself in front of a pond. It looked deep enough to swim in. She then wondered if this was the pond that Harry mentioned in his story. She wondered for a bit. After a few seconds she turned around and started to run. But as she turned around, she was grabbed by something and was forced into the pond's water. She was having a hard time holding her breath with something choking her in the neck. She tried to fight back, but the hold was too strong. Eventually she lost all her strength and fell to the pond's floor as the thing holding her neck slowly releases. As her vision goes blank, she remembers one thing about the girl mentioned in Harry's story. She didn't do her homework.
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Comments: 4

XcD123 [2012-05-11 02:36:23 +0000 UTC]

I loved this! If anything, there could be more details throughout the short story, not so cut and dry like it is now though either way, you maintained that spooky aspect thus painting a picture in my mind. This is Awesome!!!!! Haha!! Yay!...If this was a real legend, I would probably end up tortured then decapitated... I have three missing assignments haha xD

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Bugeye27 In reply to XcD123 [2012-05-11 02:39:00 +0000 UTC]

My writing style isn't very descriptive.... if I could describe things a bit more, it would contribute well to this story.

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

XcD123 In reply to Bugeye27 [2012-05-11 02:52:17 +0000 UTC]

Either way, I still love the entire story, gives me Ideas of how to write a scene that I wanted to do.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

XcD123 In reply to Bugeye27 [2012-05-11 02:49:14 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, I know, maybe instead of "Clair saw Chris came back and he showed her a photo of what he saw." You could do " Chris stumbled back into the, almost seeming, spinning room as he stumbled to the pale Clair. His hand was shaky as he hesitated flipping to the gruesome picture of beloved friend, now a disemboweled mess."

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