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Description
I never noticed I was burning my body.
It started with the cold wind stopping
The mixture of frigid air and searing flesh
Left a feeling of painful catharsis
Something you wish you could scream in pain
But you don't cause the feeling mixes into your being
So, you're left as a burning block of a frozen shell.
Then the cold stopped.
I felt heat
Hot
Hotter
It had taken me years to find out why the wind stopped
And why the fire continues to burn
It's because love is love
And lust is lust.
I could never differentiate the two
All the hours spent looking at bodies I'll never learn to hold
Wishing upon stars for the love I've never had the pleasure of knowing
Wishing for lust, but like a child to a fire
I thought it would just be warm.
Hours spent
They were spent looking through a camera
Looking for love
Love that was never there
Only other bodies burning
My naivete left me thinking this was love
NO
Not motherly love
The love of a soul rather than a body
I'd never find it.
My body is already ash.
Realizing my body was burning too late
I'm screaming
Not because I'm ash
But because the fire engulfed me
No not this shell of flesh
ME
Me who let women into his life
Wouldn't let them go because of a false hope
Only burning darker yet more ferociously
A fire the took light instead of making it
Love
I realized I have never felt love
And it gnaws at me to the core
Because I was searching supple contours
Rather than stop searching
Let the fire subside
And grow
Let the winds bring rain
Let it all tear my face into mountains
My body into earth
And my core into a molten beacon of life
NO
It was impossible at this point
I can only hope to see a single flower
I could never love it either way
Lust, this drive
It fills me with unwanted vigor
My youthful body has come to known routine
In a way I have to fight it to stop
Stop thinking of lust
Start wondering of love.
At this point, it's a dream
Something I'll probably leave in the past
Hopeful as my ash grow more grey
My body will slow.
Letting lust fade with it's color.
Take me as I am
A pile of ash
And place me at the edge of water.
So that way the fire can die,
And I can drown safely.

Description
I never noticed I was burning my body.
It started with the cold wind stopping
The mixture of frigid air and searing flesh
Left a feeling of painful catharsis
Something you wish you could scream in pain
But you don't cause the feeling mixes into your being
So, you're left as a burning block of a frozen shell.
Then the cold stopped.
I felt heat
Hot
Hotter
It had taken me years to find out why the wind stopped
And why the fire continues to burn
It's because love is love
And lust is lust.
I could never differentiate the two
All the hours spent looking at bodies I'll never learn to hold
Wishing upon stars for the love I've never had the pleasure of knowing
Wishing for lust, but like a child to a fire
I thought it would just be warm.
Hours spent
They were spent looking through a camera
Looking for love
Love that was never there
Only other bodies burning
My naivete left me thinking this was love
NO
Not motherly love
The love of a soul rather than a body
I'd never find it.
My body is already ash.
Realizing my body was burning too late
I'm screaming
Not because I'm ash
But because the fire engulfed me
No not this shell of flesh
ME
Me who let women into his life
Wouldn't let them go because of a false hope
Only burning darker yet more ferociously
A fire the took light instead of making it
Love
I realized I have never felt love
And it gnaws at me to the core
Because I was searching supple contours
Rather than stop searching
Let the fire subside
And grow
Let the winds bring rain
Let it all tear my face into mountains
My body into earth
And my core into a molten beacon of life
NO
It was impossible at this point
I can only hope to see a single flower
I could never love it either way
Lust, this drive
It fills me with unwanted vigor
My youthful body has come to known routine
In a way I have to fight it to stop
Stop thinking of lust
Start wondering of love.
At this point, it's a dream
Something I'll probably leave in the past
Hopeful as my ash grow more grey
My body will slow.
Letting lust fade with it's color.
Take me as I am
A pile of ash
And place me at the edge of water.
So that way the fire can die,
And I can drown safely.