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Description
Milestones

The early morning sky was clean and lightly splashed with color from the rising sun.  In spite of the hour, Angeles Bay’s city park was decently populated with joggers and dog walkers, as many people found this place as a perfect way to witness the start of a new day.  It was not a strange sight by any means even for a Saturday morning.  Though this day did present something a bit unusual to those passing by, causing most of them to do a double take or even stop briefly to make certain they were not seeing things.

After all, it was not everyday one would see a fully uninformed doctor and nurse sitting together under a tree.  It was even stranger to see the nurse sitting in the doctor’s lap with his arms wrapped lovingly around her body.  Stranger still to see the doctor slip a tender kiss on the nurse’s cheek, to which she sighed contently and leaned against his chest.

But Derek and Angie did just that in bold defiance of the glances they received, assuming they even noticed and, even less likely, cared.

“I could fall asleep right here. . . “ Angie mumbled and broke into a drowsy grin as Derek laughed.  Often times he was the one threatening to fall asleep, but considering the two had just completed a grueling graveyard shift he was willing to forgive her.

Teasings – however – she would not be spared from.

“You better not.  It’s your turn to buy breakfast.” he said, laughing and hugging her tighter as she squirmed and groaned.

“No fair!  You get to have coffee and I can’t!” she whined but still found herself laughing through it.

“Well, Nurse Stiles,” Derek said, grinning as he enunciated each syllable.  “You know how caffeine will affect the . . .”

“Yes, Dr. Stiles, I know, but are you aware of the affects my lack of caffeine will have on your face?”

Derek laughed, enticing a giggle from her as he squeezed her tighter and kissed her neck.  “Touchy, are we?”

“Tired!” she groaned.  “I just want to go to sleep.”

“I know, me too.  But we’re not going to sleep before we eat. . .”

“Mmmm . . . whhhyyy?”

Derek laughed even harder at his wife’s reaction.  She usually found herself on the receiving end of his nonstop grumbling and he could not help but chuckle at the role reversal, and at about how adorable she was when she whined.  “Well, first of all, there’s no way you’re weaseling out of buying me breakfast.”

She scoffed, smacking him lightly as they both laughed.  “And second of all, I’m starving and I bet you girls are too . . .”

His voice trailed off as he said that.  He moved his hand down Angie’s stomach, stopping just below her navel, and stroked it gently.  She sighed softly, looking down at his hand as she placed her fingers over his.  Her drowsy eyes blinked as she smiled and blushed lightly.  “How can you be so sure it’s a girl?”

“I just know.  Fatherly instincts I guess.”

“And what if it’s a boy?  Would you be disappointed?”

“Absolutely not.  A son would be wonderful . . .” his voice hushed to a whisper, growing warm on her cheek as he kissed it again.  “But we’re having a daughter.”

“If you say so . . .”

They broke into soft chuckles which quickly bubbled off as Derek’s fingers rose and pressed gently against her chin.  Turning her head towards him, the two indulged in the kiss as their lips met.  They pulled back slowly, taking in one another’s eyes as Derek tenderly brushed her bangs back.

“She’ll have your eyes . . .” he whispered, gently cupping her cheek.

“Really?” she arched a brow.  “I was kind of hoping it would be a mix of ours.”

“No, she’ll have your eyes.” Derek repeated as he smiled.  “They’re so beautiful . . . it’s perfect.”

“Oh Honey, you’re so cheesy!” she sighed but giggled in spite of herself.

“What?”  Derek laughed.  “Your eyes are beautiful!”

“And you are cheesy!” she said, curling up in his hold as she turned to face him.  “Sweet . . . but cheesy.”

“Fine, fine, I’m cheesy.” Derek chuckled.  “But our daughter’s going to be as pretty as her mommy.”

“Well then, we’ll have to make sure we have a son as handsome as his daddy . . .”

“Now who’s being cheesy?”

Though she joined in her husband’s laughter at his teasing, she was not at all hesitant to silence him with a kiss.  Likewise, he did not protest and welcomed it fully.  They lapped up the flavor of one another’s tongues as they deepened the kiss.  By this time, if they had their eyes open, they may have noticed that all park patrons in sight were now gaping at them, though they would not have cared much regardless.  All that was on their minds were the warmth of one another and the sign of their love growing in Angie’s belly, but another thought came to mind as they slowly pulled back and shared a fluttered blink.

“C’mon, let’s go get breakfast.” Derek said.  “All that talk about cheese made me hungry.”

Angie lightly slapped him on the head, laughing even as she rolled her eyes.  He grinned and chuckled while he rubbed his head, allowing her to get in a few more giggles before he scooped her up in his arms and rose to his feet.  She wrapped her arms around his neck and lightly hugged him, both of them well aware of the stares they were receiving at this time.  She smirked at the disapproving glance of a couple walking their dog and nuzzled her head to his chest to spite them.  Derek laughed as their narrowed eyes widened, hugging her tightly as he carried the two . . . the three of them out of the park.

-----

The patrons of the local diner had also gotten an eyeful of the doctor and nurse’s taboo relationship.  It would be a lie if they said it had not left them uncomfortable at first.  Their first impromptu outing for coffee together while still in their work uniforms had made it clear what some people thought of two medical professionals spending as much as a casual moment together, let alone a romantic one.  Though just about everyone spared them a glance, most of them were just curious or surprised and did not think much else of it.  A few, however, were down right critical and let their opinion be known through icy stares or not-so-subtle whispers.

This was hardly an obstacle in terms of their relationship as Derek and Angie both dressed nicely for their dates.  But during the times in which their workload increased and time was scarce, running home to dress was not always an option.  Long before their marriage the two had learned to tune out the criticism and simply enjoy one another’s company.  After all, there was no reason for them to forgo a nice dinner or movie together just because a few snobbish people did not like it.  Bystanders be damned, they enjoyed their breakfast, the ignorant grumbles just a few tables down powerless to stop them.

Like a gentleman, Derek had forgone his coffee for his pregnant wife’s sake and settled for orange juice.  Though when they had returned home, the price for his chivalry became evident as he groggily shuffled up the stairs.  Angie allowed him to lean some of his weight on her, sighing to herself as she wondered if the man could last more than a day without coffee.  ‘Clearly not.’ she giggled, taking the keys from him as he fumbled with the lock.  Perhaps it was for the best as they both had the same destination in mind upon entering their apartment.

Bed.  Sweet, pillowy, soft warm bed.

“Race you to the bed,” Angie smirked at her drowsy husband.  Derek returned her smile as he stood fully from her support, swaying a bit on his feet.  “Okay.” he grinned and instantly picked her up, leaving her to give a short yell of surprise at his quick revival.  He pushed the door closed with his foot, turning briefly to lock it before trotting off to their bedroom.  Angie ran her fingers through the hair on the back of his head, teasingly refusing to let go when he set her on the mattress, but her snug grip around his neck could not hold up to the tickle he gave her.  She flailed in a short fit of giggles and glared up at him as he smirked.  “I win.” he grinned, to which Angie rolled her eyes.

“Cheater.”

“I try.”  He gave her another quick tickle on her ribs as he grabbed her ankle and removed her shoes.  Angie laid still, watching as he pulled up the blanket and moved closer to tuck her in.  She waited as he loosely draped the sheet over her before rapidly poking him in the side, causing him to twitch and laugh.

“H-hey!  Angie!  Don’t!” he gasped as she stat up.  Blanket now crumpled in her lap, she moved in with a devilish grin and increased the ferocity of her tickle attack.  “Quit it!” Derek yelled and grabbed her wrists, grinning as he caught his breath.  Angie was laughing as well, putting on her best angelic face as he gave her a playful glare.  “I was going to give you a kiss, but if you’re going to be like that . . .”

“Aw,” she pouted.  “But you started it!”

“No, you did.  It was the only way I could get you to let go.”  His chuckles returned as her pout deepened and he knew he could not resist her puppy eyes if he wanted to.  He pulled her in by her hands, kissing her quickly on the lips before pecking her forehead.  “Okay, no more tickles now, right?”

“Oh, all right . . .”

She laid back down and he gave her hands a squeeze before releasing them.  He placed the blanket back over her, casually slapping away the lazy (yet persistent) hand that reached for his ribs.  “I said no more tickling!”

“I’m not!” she smirked which earned her a scoff from her husband.

“Fine, tuck yourself in, you brat.”

“Hey!”

Derek chuckled as he dropped the blanket on her, dashing to the other side of the bed and kicking his shoes off in the process.  Tossing his glasses on the side table, he all but dove under the sheets and got a second startled yell from his wife when he grabbed and hugged her to his chest.  He came down on her neck with a gentle bite, earning a third shriek as she cringed.  “I thought you said no more tickling!”

“Sorry, did that tickle?”

“Yes, a little.”

“Aw, poor Ang.”  He planted as kiss where he had bitten, leading a trail up to her temple.  He heard a content sigh poor from her and he smiled, brushing his fingers through her hair.  “You so owe me a massage for that.”

“For biting me?  Right, I’ll keep that in mind.”

After a brief round of light punching, the two snuggled into one another’s embrace, yawning contently.  “Good nigh, Derek.  I love you.” Angie said as another yawn trailed her breath.  “I love you too, g’night.” Derek whispered, his hand stroking her stomach until his fingers rested just below her navel.  “And good night to you too.”

Angie laughed, her husband joining in her chuckles as the two drifted off to sleep.

-----

Angie blinked heavily as consciousness returned to her.  She lifted her head with a content sigh, smiling as she saw her husband’s hand draped over her and felt his soft breathing on her neck.  She instantly settled back down and took in the feel of his warmth against her back as she cuddled further into him.  It was a short lived lapse into relaxation, as the late afternoon sun spilling through the windows drew her curiosity to the time.  She craned her neck slightly towards her night stand.

Only a few minutes after 4pm . . . perfect.  She and Derek did not have to go back in for the night shift for another six hours.  More than enough time for her to lie in bed with him until he woke up.  With a small yawn she settled back down and scooted herself back into his arms.  She closed her eyes, smiling as she felt his fingers tenderly run over her stomach as he shifted in his slumber.

Even in sleep the man seemed obsessed with coddling their unborn baby.  It made her bouts of morning sickness and other pregnancy pains much more bearable, knowing that she would have not only the birth of her first child to look forward to, but knowing that her husband would make an adorable father as well.  The more nagging part of her feared he would spoil their baby, but she would cross that bridge when she came to it.  It would take nothing more than a stern glare to set him straight anyhow.

She laughed quietly through her pursed lips at the thought.  She should have known during the last few hours before he found out she was pregnant what kind of father he would be.  She was a fool for having any doubt . . . .

Her smile dipped slightly.  She had expected that day to be an emotional coaster and it had not disappointed in that aspect.  There were some uncomfortable moments that accompanied it, also another expectation, though the same could not be said for the events that strung everything together.  She gave a light hearted chide.  With Derek, it was best to toss the whole concept of “normal” aside, and she would not have that any other way.

Indulging that thought, she welcomed the pull of her mind back to that night, when their lives had changed forever.

-----

“Are you ready?”

“Almost!” Angie called from their bedroom.  She took in her appearance in the mirror before her as she finished tying her hair back.  Brushing her fingers through the strands that remained loose, she nodded to herself in approval and reached into her jewelry box.  Derek had gotten her a pair of the most gorgeous earrings for her birthday a few years back; silver with a light pink gem stone in the center that he had said reminded him of her the second he saw them.  “And they look fantastic on you.” he had added, and as Angie observed herself putting them on, she could not help but agree.

She paused for a brief moment and her smile deepened as she saw something else in her reflection.

Even though it had been nearly as year since they were married, she could not help but smile when she caught glimpse of her wedding ring in the mirror.  She finished putting in the earrings and looked at her left hand.  Gently she stroked the ring, biting her lip as she placed a hand on her stomach.  The butterflies she had felt since that morning refused to settle and their raving flutters only grew more savage as she looked over to a rectangular box beside her purse.  Her heart skipped nervously.  Part of her knew she had nothing to worry about.  This was Derek, her husband, the man she loved and who returned her love fully.  Yet part of her . . .

She sighed, placing the box in a side pocket of her purse and giving herself one last glance in the mirror.  She took a deep breath and nodded to herself.  “It’ll be fine.” she said firmly.

With that, she took her purse and walked out to the living room.  Derek was casually propped against the wall as he waited for her and they both smiled upon seeing one another.  His unruly hair had decided to have some courtesy for the evening and conceded to his combing, though a few renegade strands maintained their defiance and stuck out.  If they had been attempting to offset his appearance they had failed miserably as the few messy locks only made it more endearing.  Not a thing that reminded her of her husband could make her frown.  It only reassured her that the handsome man, adorned in a clean pressed dark grey suit and light undershirt, was indeed her Derek and she did not have to feel guilty about the longing pound of her heart.

Judging by the grin that broke his face, the feeling was mutual, and Derek wasted little time in pushing himself from the wall and closing the distance between them.  He gently grabbed her arms and took in the sight of her.  Her scarlet dress added a hint of elegance to her natural beauty and he could not keep himself from kissing her if he tried.  He sighed contently at the feel of her soft lips against his and massaged her arms with his thumbs as he pulled back.

“You look great!” he said, earning a short laugh from her.

“Thank you, so do you.”

He nodded to her before letting up on his gentle grip and extending his hand.  “Shall we?”  She slipped her arm around his, their fingers interlocking as she rested her head on his shoulder.  He smiled and led the two of them from their apartment.

-----

Bista’s Italian Restaurant held a lot of memories for the couple.  Aside from being one of the first places he had taken her out to eat it was also where he had proposed to her.  They went there on a few other random occasions but for the most part it was marked with milestones in their journey through life together.  Though as Derek saw this evening as just another night out, Angie squirmed internally, knowing well that the restaurant was about to relive its tradition.  She was able to restrain her fitfulness as the waiter walked the two of them over to their table.  She just hoped that her pounding heart would not grow as loud as it felt.  She gently pressed a hand to her chest as they took their seats, grasping onto the menu as though it were a lifeline when the waiter passed them out.  “Can I start you both off with something to drink?” he asked, earning an instant nod from Derek.

“Yes, we’ll both have a glass of Barolo.”

“Oh, no wine for me tonight.”

He looked over to Angie in surprise, unable to suppress the arch of his brow.  “You’re not drinking?”

“No.  I’ll just have water, please.”

“All right, water for the miss and a Barolo for the gentleman.  I’ll have your drinks right out to you.”  The two gave a quick thanks to the waiter as he departed, but it was only a small break from the curious glance he gave her.  “What?  I just don’t feel like drinking tonight.” Angie said, tossing in a casual shrug of her shoulders which she hoped would distract from her death grip on the menu.  It was unclear to her if it had worked, for Derek did not appear to notice, but the concerned look on his face was far from gone.

“It’s just that, you always have Barolo when we come here.  Is everything okay?”

“Of course.  I’m over my cold but I just want to take it easy for a few days, you know?”

His face dropped the hint of worry it held as he nodded. “Okay, I understand.”  He gave a smile which Angie returned, somehow managing to hold back her soft breath of relief, and the two opened their menus.  She instantly brought it up to her face, ducking behind it as subtly as she could.  ‘That . . . was a little more nerve wracking than it should have been.’ she mentally grumbled to herself.  She gave a silent groan and pressed her nose to the menu.  ‘Am I really going to be able to do this?’

‘You have to.  He’s going to find out eventually . . .’

‘But, but what if . . .?’

‘What if what?  What if he’s upset?  What if he’s not ready?  What if he leaves you?’

It would never happen, but she could not help but clench her eyes shut at that last thought.

‘Angie, he loves you.  Just take it easy.  When the time comes, you’ll know what to do.  Besides, how do you think he felt on the night he proposed to you?’

She smiled to herself.  Poor Derek . . . aside from his increased state of clumsiness he had held it together pretty well on the day he asked her to marry him, though there was no doubt in her mind that he was a mess on the inside.  If he could handle that, she could handle this.  She would have to for both of their sakes . . .

“Hm, mezzasol looks pretty good.” Derek mumbled.  “So does the linguine pescatore . . .”  His eyes loosened from their narrowed study of the menu at the sound of a laugh.  He looked up to finally notice Angie all but buried in her own menu, her shoulders bobbing in barely contained laughter.  “What’s so funny?”

She peered up at him and bit her lip as it quivered in a barely contained grin. “Oh Derek, you and I both know you’re going to get the sirloin marsala . . . again.” she laughed.  “It’s the same thing every time we come here.  You act like you’re going to try something different, but you always get the sirloin.”

“Oh?” he smirked.  “So says the woman that always has the rigatoni chicken.”

“I do not!  I had the lobster ravioli when we first came here.”

“Right, when we first came.” he said.  “But every time after that-”

“Oh whatever.” she said, rolling her eyes and looking back at her menu as he laughed.  He returned to scanning his own, re-combing over each item and description, but not finding any alternatives to his usual that perked his interest.  As much as he did not want to admit it, she was probably right, and the sirloin marsala did sound good . .   No, he would get something else this time if only to see her reaction to it.  He chuckled to himself softly.  The menu was clearly not going to help him so he left it lying open on the table, instead scoping out what the other customers had ordered to see if anything caught his interest.

And not even two seconds into his scan, something did.  He blinked for a moment as a grin spread over his face.  “Hey Angie, look who’s here.”

She peeked up at him from her menu before turning her gaze to where he was looking, a surprised smile sweeping her face.  “Oh!  Imagine seeing them here.”

Several tables away from them, Greg and Cybil Kasal continued enjoying their meal and laughing amid their conversation, completely oblivious that their friends had spotted them.  It was a rather refreshing sight for the overworked married couple.  They were both well aware of the Kasal’s bouts of burnout as of late and their young child was not making things easier for them. Though he felt most of his former mentor’s pain, Derek could not help but chortle when he remembered his recent phone conversations with Greg, most of them being little more than exhausted and incoherent mumbling.  “Looks like they finally have a night to themselves.”  Derek laughed, Angie joining in with a giggle just as the waiter appeared with their drinks and a bread basket.  “Here’s your Barolo sir, and water for the miss.”

“Thank you.” they replied in unison, taking their glasses as he readied his pen and notepad.

“Are you two ready to order?”

Derek looked over to Angie, who nodded.  “Yes, I’ll have . . .” he took a moment to sigh as a light blush overcame him.  “. . the sirloin marsala.”  Angie laughed and he cast a mock glare at her, though he was smiling as well.

“And for you, miss?”

“I’ll have . . . the rigatoni chicken.” she grinned sheepishly.  The waiter paid little heed to the couple’s behavior as he scribbled down their orders, asking if they would like to add anything to it which they both declined.  He took their menus and excused himself, leaving the two to their drinks and the teasings that were sure to follow.

Ever the instigator, Derek leaned forward into the table with his cheek resting in his hand, a mischievous smile on his face.  Angie countered with a sigh and shake of her head as she reached for her water glass.  “Grow up,” she murmured, remaining locked on his stare as she brought the glass to her lips.  After spending nearly four years with the man – one of those years married to him – she should have known to look away or close her eyes while taking a sip of her drink.  And really, she should not have put it past him to stick his tongue out at her, leaving her coughing and laughing into her napkin, though she had to admit that it had something of an endearing nature to it.

Sort of . . .

“You are so immature!” she sputtered.

Derek just laughed, shaking his head the whole while.  “Hey, I’m not the one who always gets the chicken when we come here.”

“Okay okay!  So we’re both creatures of habit.” she said, her coughing fit finally abating as she glared at him.  “You started it!”

“Did not!”

Now launched into something of a laughing fit, the two did their best to retain some composure.  To their credit they had only attracted a few glances as their chuckles died down.  “I can’t take you anywhere, can I?” Angie asked, to which Derek just grinned and shrugged.  She giggled again, watching as he rose to his feet.

“I’m going to go to the restroom for a second.  I’ll be right back.”

“All right.”

Her eyes followed him a short distance as he made his way through the room, the crowd quickly swallowing him up from her vision.  Her stare lingered on where he had disappeared for only a second as her chin came to rest against her chest, and she gently pressed her hands to her belly.  “How are you doing?” she whispered and smiled.  Her insides quivered against her fingers, shooting a nerve-wracking shudder through her body.  “I know, I’m nervous too.” she sighed, gently rubbing her stomach.  “But it’ll be okay.  We both just need to hang in there.”

Angie closed her eyes and continued to stroke her stomach affectionately.  Her smile deepened and a longing sigh escaped her at the thought of the life growing inside of her, and of the man that helped her create it.  Warmth pulsed from her anxiously skipping heart and she leaned her head back, a small giggle escaping her.  Ever since she was a little girl she had been fantasizing about this stage in her life, but she never would have imagined things would have come to pass the way they did.  Nor that her husband would be sticking his tongue out at her.  She bit her lip as she laughed again.  There was no doubt in his lack of maturity at times, but she could forgive him.  As long as he would always be there to hold her, kiss her in a way that no other guy she had been with had managed.

She could not wait to see him as a father.  He would be wonderful . . .

“Honey?”

Angie blinked her eyes open to find herself staring into those of a familiar brown shade.  “Don’t fall asleep before we get our food.” Derek grinned, planting a kiss on her brow as he gently rubbed her shoulders.  She scoffed as she lifted her head.  “Well, maybe you shouldn’t take so long.  I almost sent in a rescue crew.”

“I wasn’t gone nearly that long.”  He brushed her hair behind her ears, giving her shoulders a final squeeze before he moved to his own chair.  “I just stopped by Greg and Cybil’s table for a sec to catch up.”

“How are they doing?”

“Very well, all things considered.  They finally found someone to watch Max while for a while.  Poor guys, their kid’s running them ragged!” He laughed.

Angie let out a snort at that as well.  “Did – did they actually say that?”  She took a breath before bringing up her water, making sure not to have it shooting up her nose again.

“No, but they were obviously worn down.” he mused and took a sip of his wine.  “Raising a child’s got to be tough, but they seem to be pulling it off well.  It’s admirable, but I sure don’t envy them.”

The water glass in her hand hit the table with a rough thud, the clink of the ice inside sending a flare of butterflies to rebel in her stomach.  “You – you don’t?”

“Envy them?  Oh heck no, I don’t think I could handle that kind of responsibility.”  Derek may have sent that statement off on a thin smile, but it quickly dropped, his brows rising as he looked at his wife.  “Angie?”

Ever since that morning, all she had wanted was for the fluttering in her gut to cease.  Well, she got her wish, the wings of the pestering butterflies all but shattering and giving way to a sickening cold that spread through her.

‘He . . . he’s not . . .’

“Angie?  What’s wrong?”

She snapped from her daze and met her husband’s startled gape, realizing then that her own eyes were all but bulging from her skull.  She gulped back her quickened breath and looked away.  The floor suddenly became interesting – a tolerable visual for the roaring heart beat in her otherwise deafened mind.  “N-nothing!  Nothing’s wrong.” she stammered, gripping her water glass tightly while her other hand clenched the trimming of her dress.  “I just . . . I overheard something from another table and . . . well . . . I’d really rather not repeat it.”

‘I knew it.  I knew this would happen . . .’

Her brow quivered visibly at that thought, something she was sure did not escape his gaze, but he did not comment on it.  Part of her wished he would if only to ease the frigid churning within her.  Yet she was glad he did not, knowing that she would have nothing to say for it.

‘He’s not . . . I can’t tell him . . he . .’

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” she gave a small nod of her head.  “It was just . . . rather shocking,”

“Are you sure that’s all?  Can you at least, look at me?”

Angie lapped back a sigh and lifted her head.  She flickered her eyes to him briefly, taking note of his worry creased brow before focusing on the bread basket and plucking out a piece.  “I’m sure.”  Her fingers fumbled mindlessly with the bread stick, sprinkling the table cloth with crumbs as she all but picked it apart.

‘He . . . he isn’t ready.  What should . .’

She tossed her gaze up at him, quickly diverting it back down to the bread littered table cloth as she tried to forget the concern etched on his face.

‘What should I do?’

She stopped the insistent picking of the bread, settling for crushing it in her palms as she clenched her fists.  She could feel Derek’s worried glance become more intense with the growing silence between them.  She was sure that if she even had a coherent thought in her mind that it would have been drowned out by her mournful pounding of her heart.

‘I can’t tell him . . . I . .’

In one swift motion, she popped half of the mutilated bread in her mouth, pushing the basket to her husband with her now free hand.  “Here Derek, have some bread.”

Though he understood the mumbles that pushed through her full mouth, Derek could not help but sit in confusion, his eyes moving between her and the bread basket.  “Uh . . . thank you . .”  He took a piece in hand and studied it for several seconds before nibbling at it timidly.

-----

Bista’s had proven to mark a milestone that night though it was one the couple neither wanted nor expected – the first uncomfortable dinner they had since their wedding.  Honestly, to say uncomfortable would be a bit of an understatement.  As the two picked at their food and strained their way through a forced conversation about this and that, the fierce churning inside her left Angie twitching.  Likewise, Derek spent most of dinner pushing his food on his plate, this mind fretting as to what could have caused her to act so tense and, even worse, knowing that it was something he said.

There was something of an unspoken agreement between them to head to the boardwalk and try to walk off the tension.  The restaurant was right off the Angeles Bay pier.  They had been there in the best and worst of times, relaxing or trying to find the upside in a bad situation.  Now though, neither one felt as much as an inch of relief from their shared place of haven.  A brisk wind washed over their bodies and Angie shivered, her tremors pushed further by her nerves.  Derek wrapped his arms around her and pressed her body to his chest to warm her.  She smiled at that, his sweet gestures had an uncanny way of touching her and reminding her of the lovable geek she had married.  But it also left a bittersweet ache in her heart, knowing she had to keep this from him.

“You’ve been acting strange for most of the night.  Are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?”

She sighed inwardly, knowing it was only a matter of time before Derek spoke up.  “I told you.  I just overheard something unpleasant at dinner and . . .”

“Angie.” He stopped, forcing her to do the same as he held her.  He placed his hands on her shoulders and gently turned her.  “I may be a bit dense but I’m not that stupid.  Something really upset you back there.”  His eyes tensed and he pursed his lips, sighing as he continued.  “It was me, wasn’t it?  I said something stupid and hurt you, didn’t I?”

“Oh no, it’s not you.  You didn’t do anything wrong . . .” she mumbled.  She lowered her head to the side, her gaze diverted until Derek took her chin in hand and tilted it back up to face him.  “Let’s go have a seat over there.”  He directed her to a bench facing the dark ocean, still holding her snuggly as he walked her towards it.  Angie stared out blankly as she plopped down, Derek resting an arm around her and pulling her to him until her head rested on his shoulder.  “It was because I said I wasn’t ready for children.”  He said as a matter of fact.  “Please, be honest with me.  Is that why you’ve been so quiet since dinner?”

She remained silent at that, squeezing her eyes shut as she felt a mild prick in them.  She had hoped her lids would be able to hold back the moisture pooling behind them.  To her dismay, no sooner had she felt a warm leak from her eye did she feel Derek’s finger gently brush it away.  “Hey, hey.” he whispered and gently pushed her face back to look at him.  He stroked her cheek with his thumb and rested his forehead against hers.  “Listen, I do want to have children.  I really do.  Just, give me a few years.  I’ll be ready then, I promise.”

“A few years?” she whispered, disappointment heavily saturating her breath but scarcely audible to her own ears.  Her fingers ran over her belly and she clenched her dress in a fist, biting her lip as she cast a glare out to the sea.  ‘See?  I told you this would happen!  I knew he’d be upset!’

‘Shut up.  He’s not upset . . . he doesn’t even know . . .’

‘He will be when he finds out . . .’

A strained groan escaped her as she narrowed her eyes, leaving Derek to blink in confusion.  “Angie?  You’re mad at me, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not mad at you.”

‘I’m mad at these stupid voices that won’t shut the hell up!’

‘Well you should be!  He’s being a jerk!’

‘No he’s not!  He doesn’t even know!’

Another frustrated groan pushed from her as she cringed.

“Angie?”

‘Well you can’t tell him now!  He’ll be mad.’

‘You don’t know that for sure.  He only said he wasn’t ready . . .’

‘Yeah, because he’s an insensitive-’

‘Shut UP!  His thirtieth birthday is only two months away.  It’s not unreasonable that he might actually want to enjoy what’s left of his twenties!’

She doubled over as another growl escaped her, pressing her hands the sides of her head.

“Angie?!  What’s wrong!?”

‘What about your twenties?  At least he got more than half of his!’

‘I’m not the one about to turn thirty!’

‘Stop trying to justify his self-centeredness!’

‘What self-centeredness?  He hasn’t even done anything!  He doesn’t even know!’

‘SHUT UP!  EVERYBODY SHUT UP!!!!’

The choir in her head silenced as she gritted her teeth.  Derek’s voice on the other hand only grew more alarmed.  “Are you alright?  Are you in pain?  What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine, Derek.  I’m just . . .”

Her voice tapered off, leaving her brow to crease as she tried to sweep through her muddled thoughts.  Derek leaned over her, visibly worried as he placed a hand on her shoulder.

‘Angie . . . you have to tell him something.’

Her fingers all but clawed at her temples.  Nothing came of her desperate scrapes of her skull.  “Angie?” he whispered, leaning even closer to her.

‘Say something . . . just . . say anything . .’

“Derek,” she placed her hand on the one that rested on her shoulder.  “Let’s . . .” she took in a breath.

“Yes?”

‘We don’t have a few years, Derek.  But maybe . . . if I can at least give you tonight . .’

“. . . . Let’s go have some fun!”

The sudden high pitched crack of her voice alone would have been enough to jolt him.  But that, along with her beaming face as she shot upright sent him tumbling off the bench with a startled thud.  He quickly propped himself up by his elbows, casting his perplexed stare to her.  “You want . . . what?”

The corners of her mouth twitched in a threatening betrayal as she stood up, forcing a slight bounce as she approached him.  ‘Don’t over do it now . . . just keep smiling,.’

Relaxing her steps, she reached down for his wrists and roughly pulled him to his feet. “C’mon!  Let’s go!”

“Huh?!  Hey, wait a sec!” He pulled his wrists from her grasp with a quick dig of his heels.  He remained standing in wide eyed confusion as she allowed her strained expression to dip.

“What’s wrong?”

“That’s what I’d like to know!” Derek said as he placed his hands on his hips.  “One minute you’re keeling over, cringing and now you’re all jumpy and ready to drag me around the pier?”

Her arms came to wrap around her torso, as though fearing he would see the unsteady feelings churning inside.  “You don’t mind, do you?”

“It’s not that.  It just . . .”

“Oh Derek, what happened in the restaurant . . .” she took a breath, allowing her face to relax its facade.  She bowed her head and approached him under the cover of her fallen bangs.  Her hands reached out to gently grip his shirt, pulling herself in to rest her forehead on his shoulder.  Derek wrapped his arms around her with risen brows as he looked down at her.

“Angie?”

“Just forget it.” she mumbled into his chest.  “It’s nothing.  I just want to spend time with you tonight, and for us to have fun.”

He responded only with a soothing hand on her back at first, stroking her shoulders before running his fingers through her hair. “If you’re sure you’re okay with it . .”

“I am, and . .” she brushed back her bangs, a more modest smile appearing on her face as she looked into his eyes. “I even know what we can do.”

“Oh yeah?  What did you have in mind?”

Pushing herself from his arms, she gave him a quick look over, lightly grabbing the collar of his undershirt and moving her hands down to fumble with his tie.  “No, no.  This won’t do at all.”

He blinked at her.  “Won’t do for what?”

She undid his tie, pulling down on it until his nose was pressed firmly against hers.  There was a brief pause as they stared into one another’s eyes; his fluttering with confusion while hers narrowed slyly and a playful grin cut across her face.  “Come back to the car and I’ll show you.”

Description
Milestones

The early morning sky was clean and lightly splashed with color from the rising sun.  In spite of the hour, Angeles Bay’s city park was decently populated with joggers and dog walkers, as many people found this place as a perfect way to witness the start of a new day.  It was not a strange sight by any means even for a Saturday morning.  Though this day did present something a bit unusual to those passing by, causing most of them to do a double take or even stop briefly to make certain they were not seeing things.

After all, it was not everyday one would see a fully uninformed doctor and nurse sitting together under a tree.  It was even stranger to see the nurse sitting in the doctor’s lap with his arms wrapped lovingly around her body.  Stranger still to see the doctor slip a tender kiss on the nurse’s cheek, to which she sighed contently and leaned against his chest.

But Derek and Angie did just that in bold defiance of the glances they received, assuming they even noticed and, even less likely, cared.

“I could fall asleep right here. . . “ Angie mumbled and broke into a drowsy grin as Derek laughed.  Often times he was the one threatening to fall asleep, but considering the two had just completed a grueling graveyard shift he was willing to forgive her.

Teasings – however – she would not be spared from.

“You better not.  It’s your turn to buy breakfast.” he said, laughing and hugging her tighter as she squirmed and groaned.

“No fair!  You get to have coffee and I can’t!” she whined but still found herself laughing through it.

“Well, Nurse Stiles,” Derek said, grinning as he enunciated each syllable.  “You know how caffeine will affect the . . .”

“Yes, Dr. Stiles, I know, but are you aware of the affects my lack of caffeine will have on your face?”

Derek laughed, enticing a giggle from her as he squeezed her tighter and kissed her neck.  “Touchy, are we?”

“Tired!” she groaned.  “I just want to go to sleep.”

“I know, me too.  But we’re not going to sleep before we eat. . .”

“Mmmm . . . whhhyyy?”

Derek laughed even harder at his wife’s reaction.  She usually found herself on the receiving end of his nonstop grumbling and he could not help but chuckle at the role reversal, and at about how adorable she was when she whined.  “Well, first of all, there’s no way you’re weaseling out of buying me breakfast.”

She scoffed, smacking him lightly as they both laughed.  “And second of all, I’m starving and I bet you girls are too . . .”

His voice trailed off as he said that.  He moved his hand down Angie’s stomach, stopping just below her navel, and stroked it gently.  She sighed softly, looking down at his hand as she placed her fingers over his.  Her drowsy eyes blinked as she smiled and blushed lightly.  “How can you be so sure it’s a girl?”

“I just know.  Fatherly instincts I guess.”

“And what if it’s a boy?  Would you be disappointed?”

“Absolutely not.  A son would be wonderful . . .” his voice hushed to a whisper, growing warm on her cheek as he kissed it again.  “But we’re having a daughter.”

“If you say so . . .”

They broke into soft chuckles which quickly bubbled off as Derek’s fingers rose and pressed gently against her chin.  Turning her head towards him, the two indulged in the kiss as their lips met.  They pulled back slowly, taking in one another’s eyes as Derek tenderly brushed her bangs back.

“She’ll have your eyes . . .” he whispered, gently cupping her cheek.

“Really?” she arched a brow.  “I was kind of hoping it would be a mix of ours.”

“No, she’ll have your eyes.” Derek repeated as he smiled.  “They’re so beautiful . . . it’s perfect.”

“Oh Honey, you’re so cheesy!” she sighed but giggled in spite of herself.

“What?”  Derek laughed.  “Your eyes are beautiful!”

“And you are cheesy!” she said, curling up in his hold as she turned to face him.  “Sweet . . . but cheesy.”

“Fine, fine, I’m cheesy.” Derek chuckled.  “But our daughter’s going to be as pretty as her mommy.”

“Well then, we’ll have to make sure we have a son as handsome as his daddy . . .”

“Now who’s being cheesy?”

Though she joined in her husband’s laughter at his teasing, she was not at all hesitant to silence him with a kiss.  Likewise, he did not protest and welcomed it fully.  They lapped up the flavor of one another’s tongues as they deepened the kiss.  By this time, if they had their eyes open, they may have noticed that all park patrons in sight were now gaping at them, though they would not have cared much regardless.  All that was on their minds were the warmth of one another and the sign of their love growing in Angie’s belly, but another thought came to mind as they slowly pulled back and shared a fluttered blink.

“C’mon, let’s go get breakfast.” Derek said.  “All that talk about cheese made me hungry.”

Angie lightly slapped him on the head, laughing even as she rolled her eyes.  He grinned and chuckled while he rubbed his head, allowing her to get in a few more giggles before he scooped her up in his arms and rose to his feet.  She wrapped her arms around his neck and lightly hugged him, both of them well aware of the stares they were receiving at this time.  She smirked at the disapproving glance of a couple walking their dog and nuzzled her head to his chest to spite them.  Derek laughed as their narrowed eyes widened, hugging her tightly as he carried the two . . . the three of them out of the park.

-----

The patrons of the local diner had also gotten an eyeful of the doctor and nurse’s taboo relationship.  It would be a lie if they said it had not left them uncomfortable at first.  Their first impromptu outing for coffee together while still in their work uniforms had made it clear what some people thought of two medical professionals spending as much as a casual moment together, let alone a romantic one.  Though just about everyone spared them a glance, most of them were just curious or surprised and did not think much else of it.  A few, however, were down right critical and let their opinion be known through icy stares or not-so-subtle whispers.

This was hardly an obstacle in terms of their relationship as Derek and Angie both dressed nicely for their dates.  But during the times in which their workload increased and time was scarce, running home to dress was not always an option.  Long before their marriage the two had learned to tune out the criticism and simply enjoy one another’s company.  After all, there was no reason for them to forgo a nice dinner or movie together just because a few snobbish people did not like it.  Bystanders be damned, they enjoyed their breakfast, the ignorant grumbles just a few tables down powerless to stop them.

Like a gentleman, Derek had forgone his coffee for his pregnant wife’s sake and settled for orange juice.  Though when they had returned home, the price for his chivalry became evident as he groggily shuffled up the stairs.  Angie allowed him to lean some of his weight on her, sighing to herself as she wondered if the man could last more than a day without coffee.  ‘Clearly not.’ she giggled, taking the keys from him as he fumbled with the lock.  Perhaps it was for the best as they both had the same destination in mind upon entering their apartment.

Bed.  Sweet, pillowy, soft warm bed.

“Race you to the bed,” Angie smirked at her drowsy husband.  Derek returned her smile as he stood fully from her support, swaying a bit on his feet.  “Okay.” he grinned and instantly picked her up, leaving her to give a short yell of surprise at his quick revival.  He pushed the door closed with his foot, turning briefly to lock it before trotting off to their bedroom.  Angie ran her fingers through the hair on the back of his head, teasingly refusing to let go when he set her on the mattress, but her snug grip around his neck could not hold up to the tickle he gave her.  She flailed in a short fit of giggles and glared up at him as he smirked.  “I win.” he grinned, to which Angie rolled her eyes.

“Cheater.”

“I try.”  He gave her another quick tickle on her ribs as he grabbed her ankle and removed her shoes.  Angie laid still, watching as he pulled up the blanket and moved closer to tuck her in.  She waited as he loosely draped the sheet over her before rapidly poking him in the side, causing him to twitch and laugh.

“H-hey!  Angie!  Don’t!” he gasped as she stat up.  Blanket now crumpled in her lap, she moved in with a devilish grin and increased the ferocity of her tickle attack.  “Quit it!” Derek yelled and grabbed her wrists, grinning as he caught his breath.  Angie was laughing as well, putting on her best angelic face as he gave her a playful glare.  “I was going to give you a kiss, but if you’re going to be like that . . .”

“Aw,” she pouted.  “But you started it!”

“No, you did.  It was the only way I could get you to let go.”  His chuckles returned as her pout deepened and he knew he could not resist her puppy eyes if he wanted to.  He pulled her in by her hands, kissing her quickly on the lips before pecking her forehead.  “Okay, no more tickles now, right?”

“Oh, all right . . .”

She laid back down and he gave her hands a squeeze before releasing them.  He placed the blanket back over her, casually slapping away the lazy (yet persistent) hand that reached for his ribs.  “I said no more tickling!”

“I’m not!” she smirked which earned her a scoff from her husband.

“Fine, tuck yourself in, you brat.”

“Hey!”

Derek chuckled as he dropped the blanket on her, dashing to the other side of the bed and kicking his shoes off in the process.  Tossing his glasses on the side table, he all but dove under the sheets and got a second startled yell from his wife when he grabbed and hugged her to his chest.  He came down on her neck with a gentle bite, earning a third shriek as she cringed.  “I thought you said no more tickling!”

“Sorry, did that tickle?”

“Yes, a little.”

“Aw, poor Ang.”  He planted as kiss where he had bitten, leading a trail up to her temple.  He heard a content sigh poor from her and he smiled, brushing his fingers through her hair.  “You so owe me a massage for that.”

“For biting me?  Right, I’ll keep that in mind.”

After a brief round of light punching, the two snuggled into one another’s embrace, yawning contently.  “Good nigh, Derek.  I love you.” Angie said as another yawn trailed her breath.  “I love you too, g’night.” Derek whispered, his hand stroking her stomach until his fingers rested just below her navel.  “And good night to you too.”

Angie laughed, her husband joining in her chuckles as the two drifted off to sleep.

-----

Angie blinked heavily as consciousness returned to her.  She lifted her head with a content sigh, smiling as she saw her husband’s hand draped over her and felt his soft breathing on her neck.  She instantly settled back down and took in the feel of his warmth against her back as she cuddled further into him.  It was a short lived lapse into relaxation, as the late afternoon sun spilling through the windows drew her curiosity to the time.  She craned her neck slightly towards her night stand.

Only a few minutes after 4pm . . . perfect.  She and Derek did not have to go back in for the night shift for another six hours.  More than enough time for her to lie in bed with him until he woke up.  With a small yawn she settled back down and scooted herself back into his arms.  She closed her eyes, smiling as she felt his fingers tenderly run over her stomach as he shifted in his slumber.

Even in sleep the man seemed obsessed with coddling their unborn baby.  It made her bouts of morning sickness and other pregnancy pains much more bearable, knowing that she would have not only the birth of her first child to look forward to, but knowing that her husband would make an adorable father as well.  The more nagging part of her feared he would spoil their baby, but she would cross that bridge when she came to it.  It would take nothing more than a stern glare to set him straight anyhow.

She laughed quietly through her pursed lips at the thought.  She should have known during the last few hours before he found out she was pregnant what kind of father he would be.  She was a fool for having any doubt . . . .

Her smile dipped slightly.  She had expected that day to be an emotional coaster and it had not disappointed in that aspect.  There were some uncomfortable moments that accompanied it, also another expectation, though the same could not be said for the events that strung everything together.  She gave a light hearted chide.  With Derek, it was best to toss the whole concept of “normal” aside, and she would not have that any other way.

Indulging that thought, she welcomed the pull of her mind back to that night, when their lives had changed forever.

-----

“Are you ready?”

“Almost!” Angie called from their bedroom.  She took in her appearance in the mirror before her as she finished tying her hair back.  Brushing her fingers through the strands that remained loose, she nodded to herself in approval and reached into her jewelry box.  Derek had gotten her a pair of the most gorgeous earrings for her birthday a few years back; silver with a light pink gem stone in the center that he had said reminded him of her the second he saw them.  “And they look fantastic on you.” he had added, and as Angie observed herself putting them on, she could not help but agree.

She paused for a brief moment and her smile deepened as she saw something else in her reflection.

Even though it had been nearly as year since they were married, she could not help but smile when she caught glimpse of her wedding ring in the mirror.  She finished putting in the earrings and looked at her left hand.  Gently she stroked the ring, biting her lip as she placed a hand on her stomach.  The butterflies she had felt since that morning refused to settle and their raving flutters only grew more savage as she looked over to a rectangular box beside her purse.  Her heart skipped nervously.  Part of her knew she had nothing to worry about.  This was Derek, her husband, the man she loved and who returned her love fully.  Yet part of her . . .

She sighed, placing the box in a side pocket of her purse and giving herself one last glance in the mirror.  She took a deep breath and nodded to herself.  “It’ll be fine.” she said firmly.

With that, she took her purse and walked out to the living room.  Derek was casually propped against the wall as he waited for her and they both smiled upon seeing one another.  His unruly hair had decided to have some courtesy for the evening and conceded to his combing, though a few renegade strands maintained their defiance and stuck out.  If they had been attempting to offset his appearance they had failed miserably as the few messy locks only made it more endearing.  Not a thing that reminded her of her husband could make her frown.  It only reassured her that the handsome man, adorned in a clean pressed dark grey suit and light undershirt, was indeed her Derek and she did not have to feel guilty about the longing pound of her heart.

Judging by the grin that broke his face, the feeling was mutual, and Derek wasted little time in pushing himself from the wall and closing the distance between them.  He gently grabbed her arms and took in the sight of her.  Her scarlet dress added a hint of elegance to her natural beauty and he could not keep himself from kissing her if he tried.  He sighed contently at the feel of her soft lips against his and massaged her arms with his thumbs as he pulled back.

“You look great!” he said, earning a short laugh from her.

“Thank you, so do you.”

He nodded to her before letting up on his gentle grip and extending his hand.  “Shall we?”  She slipped her arm around his, their fingers interlocking as she rested her head on his shoulder.  He smiled and led the two of them from their apartment.

-----

Bista’s Italian Restaurant held a lot of memories for the couple.  Aside from being one of the first places he had taken her out to eat it was also where he had proposed to her.  They went there on a few other random occasions but for the most part it was marked with milestones in their journey through life together.  Though as Derek saw this evening as just another night out, Angie squirmed internally, knowing well that the restaurant was about to relive its tradition.  She was able to restrain her fitfulness as the waiter walked the two of them over to their table.  She just hoped that her pounding heart would not grow as loud as it felt.  She gently pressed a hand to her chest as they took their seats, grasping onto the menu as though it were a lifeline when the waiter passed them out.  “Can I start you both off with something to drink?” he asked, earning an instant nod from Derek.

“Yes, we’ll both have a glass of Barolo.”

“Oh, no wine for me tonight.”

He looked over to Angie in surprise, unable to suppress the arch of his brow.  “You’re not drinking?”

“No.  I’ll just have water, please.”

“All right, water for the miss and a Barolo for the gentleman.  I’ll have your drinks right out to you.”  The two gave a quick thanks to the waiter as he departed, but it was only a small break from the curious glance he gave her.  “What?  I just don’t feel like drinking tonight.” Angie said, tossing in a casual shrug of her shoulders which she hoped would distract from her death grip on the menu.  It was unclear to her if it had worked, for Derek did not appear to notice, but the concerned look on his face was far from gone.

“It’s just that, you always have Barolo when we come here.  Is everything okay?”

“Of course.  I’m over my cold but I just want to take it easy for a few days, you know?”

His face dropped the hint of worry it held as he nodded. “Okay, I understand.”  He gave a smile which Angie returned, somehow managing to hold back her soft breath of relief, and the two opened their menus.  She instantly brought it up to her face, ducking behind it as subtly as she could.  ‘That . . . was a little more nerve wracking than it should have been.’ she mentally grumbled to herself.  She gave a silent groan and pressed her nose to the menu.  ‘Am I really going to be able to do this?’

‘You have to.  He’s going to find out eventually . . .’

‘But, but what if . . .?’

‘What if what?  What if he’s upset?  What if he’s not ready?  What if he leaves you?’

It would never happen, but she could not help but clench her eyes shut at that last thought.

‘Angie, he loves you.  Just take it easy.  When the time comes, you’ll know what to do.  Besides, how do you think he felt on the night he proposed to you?’

She smiled to herself.  Poor Derek . . . aside from his increased state of clumsiness he had held it together pretty well on the day he asked her to marry him, though there was no doubt in her mind that he was a mess on the inside.  If he could handle that, she could handle this.  She would have to for both of their sakes . . .

“Hm, mezzasol looks pretty good.” Derek mumbled.  “So does the linguine pescatore . . .”  His eyes loosened from their narrowed study of the menu at the sound of a laugh.  He looked up to finally notice Angie all but buried in her own menu, her shoulders bobbing in barely contained laughter.  “What’s so funny?”

She peered up at him and bit her lip as it quivered in a barely contained grin. “Oh Derek, you and I both know you’re going to get the sirloin marsala . . . again.” she laughed.  “It’s the same thing every time we come here.  You act like you’re going to try something different, but you always get the sirloin.”

“Oh?” he smirked.  “So says the woman that always has the rigatoni chicken.”

“I do not!  I had the lobster ravioli when we first came here.”

“Right, when we first came.” he said.  “But every time after that-”

“Oh whatever.” she said, rolling her eyes and looking back at her menu as he laughed.  He returned to scanning his own, re-combing over each item and description, but not finding any alternatives to his usual that perked his interest.  As much as he did not want to admit it, she was probably right, and the sirloin marsala did sound good . .   No, he would get something else this time if only to see her reaction to it.  He chuckled to himself softly.  The menu was clearly not going to help him so he left it lying open on the table, instead scoping out what the other customers had ordered to see if anything caught his interest.

And not even two seconds into his scan, something did.  He blinked for a moment as a grin spread over his face.  “Hey Angie, look who’s here.”

She peeked up at him from her menu before turning her gaze to where he was looking, a surprised smile sweeping her face.  “Oh!  Imagine seeing them here.”

Several tables away from them, Greg and Cybil Kasal continued enjoying their meal and laughing amid their conversation, completely oblivious that their friends had spotted them.  It was a rather refreshing sight for the overworked married couple.  They were both well aware of the Kasal’s bouts of burnout as of late and their young child was not making things easier for them. Though he felt most of his former mentor’s pain, Derek could not help but chortle when he remembered his recent phone conversations with Greg, most of them being little more than exhausted and incoherent mumbling.  “Looks like they finally have a night to themselves.”  Derek laughed, Angie joining in with a giggle just as the waiter appeared with their drinks and a bread basket.  “Here’s your Barolo sir, and water for the miss.”

“Thank you.” they replied in unison, taking their glasses as he readied his pen and notepad.

“Are you two ready to order?”

Derek looked over to Angie, who nodded.  “Yes, I’ll have . . .” he took a moment to sigh as a light blush overcame him.  “. . the sirloin marsala.”  Angie laughed and he cast a mock glare at her, though he was smiling as well.

“And for you, miss?”

“I’ll have . . . the rigatoni chicken.” she grinned sheepishly.  The waiter paid little heed to the couple’s behavior as he scribbled down their orders, asking if they would like to add anything to it which they both declined.  He took their menus and excused himself, leaving the two to their drinks and the teasings that were sure to follow.

Ever the instigator, Derek leaned forward into the table with his cheek resting in his hand, a mischievous smile on his face.  Angie countered with a sigh and shake of her head as she reached for her water glass.  “Grow up,” she murmured, remaining locked on his stare as she brought the glass to her lips.  After spending nearly four years with the man – one of those years married to him – she should have known to look away or close her eyes while taking a sip of her drink.  And really, she should not have put it past him to stick his tongue out at her, leaving her coughing and laughing into her napkin, though she had to admit that it had something of an endearing nature to it.

Sort of . . .

“You are so immature!” she sputtered.

Derek just laughed, shaking his head the whole while.  “Hey, I’m not the one who always gets the chicken when we come here.”

“Okay okay!  So we’re both creatures of habit.” she said, her coughing fit finally abating as she glared at him.  “You started it!”

“Did not!”

Now launched into something of a laughing fit, the two did their best to retain some composure.  To their credit they had only attracted a few glances as their chuckles died down.  “I can’t take you anywhere, can I?” Angie asked, to which Derek just grinned and shrugged.  She giggled again, watching as he rose to his feet.

“I’m going to go to the restroom for a second.  I’ll be right back.”

“All right.”

Her eyes followed him a short distance as he made his way through the room, the crowd quickly swallowing him up from her vision.  Her stare lingered on where he had disappeared for only a second as her chin came to rest against her chest, and she gently pressed her hands to her belly.  “How are you doing?” she whispered and smiled.  Her insides quivered against her fingers, shooting a nerve-wracking shudder through her body.  “I know, I’m nervous too.” she sighed, gently rubbing her stomach.  “But it’ll be okay.  We both just need to hang in there.”

Angie closed her eyes and continued to stroke her stomach affectionately.  Her smile deepened and a longing sigh escaped her at the thought of the life growing inside of her, and of the man that helped her create it.  Warmth pulsed from her anxiously skipping heart and she leaned her head back, a small giggle escaping her.  Ever since she was a little girl she had been fantasizing about this stage in her life, but she never would have imagined things would have come to pass the way they did.  Nor that her husband would be sticking his tongue out at her.  She bit her lip as she laughed again.  There was no doubt in his lack of maturity at times, but she could forgive him.  As long as he would always be there to hold her, kiss her in a way that no other guy she had been with had managed.

She could not wait to see him as a father.  He would be wonderful . . .

“Honey?”

Angie blinked her eyes open to find herself staring into those of a familiar brown shade.  “Don’t fall asleep before we get our food.” Derek grinned, planting a kiss on her brow as he gently rubbed her shoulders.  She scoffed as she lifted her head.  “Well, maybe you shouldn’t take so long.  I almost sent in a rescue crew.”

“I wasn’t gone nearly that long.”  He brushed her hair behind her ears, giving her shoulders a final squeeze before he moved to his own chair.  “I just stopped by Greg and Cybil’s table for a sec to catch up.”

“How are they doing?”

“Very well, all things considered.  They finally found someone to watch Max while for a while.  Poor guys, their kid’s running them ragged!” He laughed.

Angie let out a snort at that as well.  “Did – did they actually say that?”  She took a breath before bringing up her water, making sure not to have it shooting up her nose again.

“No, but they were obviously worn down.” he mused and took a sip of his wine.  “Raising a child’s got to be tough, but they seem to be pulling it off well.  It’s admirable, but I sure don’t envy them.”

The water glass in her hand hit the table with a rough thud, the clink of the ice inside sending a flare of butterflies to rebel in her stomach.  “You – you don’t?”

“Envy them?  Oh heck no, I don’t think I could handle that kind of responsibility.”  Derek may have sent that statement off on a thin smile, but it quickly dropped, his brows rising as he looked at his wife.  “Angie?”

Ever since that morning, all she had wanted was for the fluttering in her gut to cease.  Well, she got her wish, the wings of the pestering butterflies all but shattering and giving way to a sickening cold that spread through her.

‘He . . . he’s not . . .’

“Angie?  What’s wrong?”

She snapped from her daze and met her husband’s startled gape, realizing then that her own eyes were all but bulging from her skull.  She gulped back her quickened breath and looked away.  The floor suddenly became interesting – a tolerable visual for the roaring heart beat in her otherwise deafened mind.  “N-nothing!  Nothing’s wrong.” she stammered, gripping her water glass tightly while her other hand clenched the trimming of her dress.  “I just . . . I overheard something from another table and . . . well . . . I’d really rather not repeat it.”

‘I knew it.  I knew this would happen . . .’

Her brow quivered visibly at that thought, something she was sure did not escape his gaze, but he did not comment on it.  Part of her wished he would if only to ease the frigid churning within her.  Yet she was glad he did not, knowing that she would have nothing to say for it.

‘He’s not . . . I can’t tell him . . he . .’

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” she gave a small nod of her head.  “It was just . . . rather shocking,”

“Are you sure that’s all?  Can you at least, look at me?”

Angie lapped back a sigh and lifted her head.  She flickered her eyes to him briefly, taking note of his worry creased brow before focusing on the bread basket and plucking out a piece.  “I’m sure.”  Her fingers fumbled mindlessly with the bread stick, sprinkling the table cloth with crumbs as she all but picked it apart.

‘He . . . he isn’t ready.  What should . .’

She tossed her gaze up at him, quickly diverting it back down to the bread littered table cloth as she tried to forget the concern etched on his face.

‘What should I do?’

She stopped the insistent picking of the bread, settling for crushing it in her palms as she clenched her fists.  She could feel Derek’s worried glance become more intense with the growing silence between them.  She was sure that if she even had a coherent thought in her mind that it would have been drowned out by her mournful pounding of her heart.

‘I can’t tell him . . . I . .’

In one swift motion, she popped half of the mutilated bread in her mouth, pushing the basket to her husband with her now free hand.  “Here Derek, have some bread.”

Though he understood the mumbles that pushed through her full mouth, Derek could not help but sit in confusion, his eyes moving between her and the bread basket.  “Uh . . . thank you . .”  He took a piece in hand and studied it for several seconds before nibbling at it timidly.

-----

Bista’s had proven to mark a milestone that night though it was one the couple neither wanted nor expected – the first uncomfortable dinner they had since their wedding.  Honestly, to say uncomfortable would be a bit of an understatement.  As the two picked at their food and strained their way through a forced conversation about this and that, the fierce churning inside her left Angie twitching.  Likewise, Derek spent most of dinner pushing his food on his plate, this mind fretting as to what could have caused her to act so tense and, even worse, knowing that it was something he said.

There was something of an unspoken agreement between them to head to the boardwalk and try to walk off the tension.  The restaurant was right off the Angeles Bay pier.  They had been there in the best and worst of times, relaxing or trying to find the upside in a bad situation.  Now though, neither one felt as much as an inch of relief from their shared place of haven.  A brisk wind washed over their bodies and Angie shivered, her tremors pushed further by her nerves.  Derek wrapped his arms around her and pressed her body to his chest to warm her.  She smiled at that, his sweet gestures had an uncanny way of touching her and reminding her of the lovable geek she had married.  But it also left a bittersweet ache in her heart, knowing she had to keep this from him.

“You’ve been acting strange for most of the night.  Are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?”

She sighed inwardly, knowing it was only a matter of time before Derek spoke up.  “I told you.  I just overheard something unpleasant at dinner and . . .”

“Angie.” He stopped, forcing her to do the same as he held her.  He placed his hands on her shoulders and gently turned her.  “I may be a bit dense but I’m not that stupid.  Something really upset you back there.”  His eyes tensed and he pursed his lips, sighing as he continued.  “It was me, wasn’t it?  I said something stupid and hurt you, didn’t I?”

“Oh no, it’s not you.  You didn’t do anything wrong . . .” she mumbled.  She lowered her head to the side, her gaze diverted until Derek took her chin in hand and tilted it back up to face him.  “Let’s go have a seat over there.”  He directed her to a bench facing the dark ocean, still holding her snuggly as he walked her towards it.  Angie stared out blankly as she plopped down, Derek resting an arm around her and pulling her to him until her head rested on his shoulder.  “It was because I said I wasn’t ready for children.”  He said as a matter of fact.  “Please, be honest with me.  Is that why you’ve been so quiet since dinner?”

She remained silent at that, squeezing her eyes shut as she felt a mild prick in them.  She had hoped her lids would be able to hold back the moisture pooling behind them.  To her dismay, no sooner had she felt a warm leak from her eye did she feel Derek’s finger gently brush it away.  “Hey, hey.” he whispered and gently pushed her face back to look at him.  He stroked her cheek with his thumb and rested his forehead against hers.  “Listen, I do want to have children.  I really do.  Just, give me a few years.  I’ll be ready then, I promise.”

“A few years?” she whispered, disappointment heavily saturating her breath but scarcely audible to her own ears.  Her fingers ran over her belly and she clenched her dress in a fist, biting her lip as she cast a glare out to the sea.  ‘See?  I told you this would happen!  I knew he’d be upset!’

‘Shut up.  He’s not upset . . . he doesn’t even know . . .’

‘He will be when he finds out . . .’

A strained groan escaped her as she narrowed her eyes, leaving Derek to blink in confusion.  “Angie?  You’re mad at me, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not mad at you.”

‘I’m mad at these stupid voices that won’t shut the hell up!’

‘Well you should be!  He’s being a jerk!’

‘No he’s not!  He doesn’t even know!’

Another frustrated groan pushed from her as she cringed.

“Angie?”

‘Well you can’t tell him now!  He’ll be mad.’

‘You don’t know that for sure.  He only said he wasn’t ready . . .’

‘Yeah, because he’s an insensitive-’

‘Shut UP!  His thirtieth birthday is only two months away.  It’s not unreasonable that he might actually want to enjoy what’s left of his twenties!’

She doubled over as another growl escaped her, pressing her hands the sides of her head.

“Angie?!  What’s wrong!?”

‘What about your twenties?  At least he got more than half of his!’

‘I’m not the one about to turn thirty!’

‘Stop trying to justify his self-centeredness!’

‘What self-centeredness?  He hasn’t even done anything!  He doesn’t even know!’

‘SHUT UP!  EVERYBODY SHUT UP!!!!’

The choir in her head silenced as she gritted her teeth.  Derek’s voice on the other hand only grew more alarmed.  “Are you alright?  Are you in pain?  What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine, Derek.  I’m just . . .”

Her voice tapered off, leaving her brow to crease as she tried to sweep through her muddled thoughts.  Derek leaned over her, visibly worried as he placed a hand on her shoulder.

‘Angie . . . you have to tell him something.’

Her fingers all but clawed at her temples.  Nothing came of her desperate scrapes of her skull.  “Angie?” he whispered, leaning even closer to her.

‘Say something . . . just . . say anything . .’

“Derek,” she placed her hand on the one that rested on her shoulder.  “Let’s . . .” she took in a breath.

“Yes?”

‘We don’t have a few years, Derek.  But maybe . . . if I can at least give you tonight . .’

“. . . . Let’s go have some fun!”

The sudden high pitched crack of her voice alone would have been enough to jolt him.  But that, along with her beaming face as she shot upright sent him tumbling off the bench with a startled thud.  He quickly propped himself up by his elbows, casting his perplexed stare to her.  “You want . . . what?”

The corners of her mouth twitched in a threatening betrayal as she stood up, forcing a slight bounce as she approached him.  ‘Don’t over do it now . . . just keep smiling,.’

Relaxing her steps, she reached down for his wrists and roughly pulled him to his feet. “C’mon!  Let’s go!”

“Huh?!  Hey, wait a sec!” He pulled his wrists from her grasp with a quick dig of his heels.  He remained standing in wide eyed confusion as she allowed her strained expression to dip.

“What’s wrong?”

“That’s what I’d like to know!” Derek said as he placed his hands on his hips.  “One minute you’re keeling over, cringing and now you’re all jumpy and ready to drag me around the pier?”

Her arms came to wrap around her torso, as though fearing he would see the unsteady feelings churning inside.  “You don’t mind, do you?”

“It’s not that.  It just . . .”

“Oh Derek, what happened in the restaurant . . .” she took a breath, allowing her face to relax its facade.  She bowed her head and approached him under the cover of her fallen bangs.  Her hands reached out to gently grip his shirt, pulling herself in to rest her forehead on his shoulder.  Derek wrapped his arms around her with risen brows as he looked down at her.

“Angie?”

“Just forget it.” she mumbled into his chest.  “It’s nothing.  I just want to spend time with you tonight, and for us to have fun.”

He responded only with a soothing hand on her back at first, stroking her shoulders before running his fingers through her hair. “If you’re sure you’re okay with it . .”

“I am, and . .” she brushed back her bangs, a more modest smile appearing on her face as she looked into his eyes. “I even know what we can do.”

“Oh yeah?  What did you have in mind?”

Pushing herself from his arms, she gave him a quick look over, lightly grabbing the collar of his undershirt and moving her hands down to fumble with his tie.  “No, no.  This won’t do at all.”

He blinked at her.  “Won’t do for what?”

She undid his tie, pulling down on it until his nose was pressed firmly against hers.  There was a brief pause as they stared into one another’s eyes; his fluttering with confusion while hers narrowed slyly and a playful grin cut across her face.  “Come back to the car and I’ll show you.”