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curlandgrazes — Self Portrait 1
Published: 2012-03-02 13:06:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 1399; Favourites: 12; Downloads: 2
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Self Portrait. Empathy, anyone?If you like my work and would like to show some support, please visit my facebook page at [link]
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Comments: 39
I would like to write some feedback on this work of yours, especially because it has no critiques yet and since I saw this painting yesterday, I kept thinking about it.
This painting has incredible impact. It has a meaning and it's full of it, every little piece. I see a lot of symbols: the red rose, two color background strictly divided in two uneven parts, diffusing on the face. For some reason I am deeply aware of the fact that the line crosses one eye and I tend to think it was done purposely, too. Red lips matching the rose are such strong symbol of femaleness, yet trapped with cold part of the painting.
And than the eyes. Those are the breaking point. They tell the whole story and are so true and honest, as if this is their last opportunity to tell us. Lips don't speak, eyes do.
Now I should be looking for a minus to discuss, right? If you have painted something to be a decoration, I could find minuses. But this is a portrait of your soul. And I feel that I understand you in some ways. Thank you for sharing this painting, it's quite the experience to see it.
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I would like to encourage you to paint more things like this. There will be always tons of pretty things in the world, because people worship beauty. Art, however, should be about thoughts and truth. And I forgot to mention that the painting emotionally strongly reminds me of Frida Kahlo and her paintings, full of pain yet artful and message-bearing.
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She is a great inspiration to me. To me she represents not just her own sorrow and feelings, but somehow she almost... encompassed and held and spoke for the pain and suffering of her people in a time of such political turmoil. Perhaps this was an inadvertent transference from her relationship with Diego... but nonetheless her honesty and... FEARLESSNESS! Wow! I'm very flattered to be compared to her.
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It's incredible, the impact of your critique. Most of my work put up online BEFORE this have been photographs that are kind of semi cool and nothing more, if there had been meaning it was so inconspicuous and masked, therefore I felt it was safe enough to put up because if it were to be torn apart (whether or not the viewer were to publish this disection), it doesn't matter all that much- the hurt would have had minimum impact.. This is the first one I've published that bore a real resemblance to... me and the combination of things that is going on inside. Reading a critique like yours makes me feel... relieved? Safe? Understood? Maybe all or none of those things... but it makes me feel very much in touch with my being human. Thank you, so much.
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You seem so sad trapped behind your own private thorn forest. I take heart that you express your grief so eloquently. Once it is out there on your page, it means that that you have already began to process it. It is also heartening that tawdry depressive feelings can be harnessed to produce something so beautiful. Perhaps I will put up a few self-portraits.
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I love the concept behind this! Great job!
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It's wonderful and creative!! really extraordinary 
love it
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Thank you so much for commenting on this one also, I really do appreciate the feedback!
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No problem ^^ love the work, keep it up!
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Thank you for commenting and for featuring my work in your group 
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This is done very well I'd have to agree with jane-beata it has a lot of thought behind it. Nice to see this. Thank you. Keep going.
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Thank you for coming by and the nice words. I'd like to also take this opportunity to direct you to Jane-Beata's new critique event on this journal: [link] You might find other artist's work that you may feel inclined to comment on/fave/critique
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Thank you thank you thank you!
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Thank you! This was the final incarnation of the rose you commented on
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Really nice concept. I absolutely love the rose, too.
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Thank you so much!
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Lovely brush strokes, the concept is also very nice
I just think the composition could use some work, it's a little bit strange how the left side of the picture seems so much more detailed and important than the right side. I think that could be repaired by letting the colors have half-half of the picture rather than 60-40 as is the case here. The big, red rose isn't really helping either since there isn't anything on the other side of the picture that could compete with it.
Anatomy-wise, the eyes are too far apart and the head is too short. The eyes should always be placed in the very middle of the head, only reason most people don't realize that is because our hair grows a little down the forehead
I hope this helped a little for your future pieces. Keep up the great work!
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Hello! I had written a whole reply to your comment on my phone to find that I never did send it so here I am writing again!
Thank you so much for your detailed comment. It's ever so useful to know others' insights into my work. I think, because of your thoughtful response, I would like to share with you the contextual background of the piece. I believe you may have some further insights that if you would share them with me, I will find invaluable.
Yes, I did think that the composition was a little awkward upon finishing the work, and you have just hit the nail on the head there (I couldn't really put my finger on ti before now!). However the 60-40 division was deliberate - I wanted more focus on the black and white side. The piece is exploring the idea of empathy as a reciprocal thing - we need to feel empathy in order to empathise and when someone is unempathic to us, it attacks our own capacity to empathise. At this time I was feeling rather incapable of empathy having been going through a "rough patch" in my personal life. I also work with 3 autistic young lads as my full time job, which was difficult because again there's a lack of empathy in its standard form in that environment. So, the left side represents the part of me that felt completely drained due to lack of empathy. However due to my occupation I had to pretend and behave empathically anyway. The red rose is a fake plastic red flower (which is what it was drawn from) representing this... artificial empathy and kindness I had to embody at work which my heart wasn't really in. The question I pose here is whilst the flower is plastic, does it not have the same effect? Do we really need to be genuinely empathetic all the time even when we really don't give a shit because nobody gives a shit about us (or so we feel)? A larger part of me was feeling this way, hence the 60-40 composition.
the 40 percent I felt was also important because it reperesented my own humanity. I might feel like a robot in my work but I'm still human and I'm still here for the people for whom I care. That humanity is so simple. I wanted there to be little detail in comparison, to emphasise the simplicity of a "perfectly" functioning human in contrast to the complexities of being ACTUALLY human, having this need for attachement and empathy.
Anatomy-wise. Yes, I do find it difficult to do life painting. So much more difficult than life drawing, and this image was painted out through a mirror. So I couldn't quite get the proportions right whilst I have to look at the mirror and then the painting and then the mirror. But practice practice practice! It is also difficult for me to see "what's wrong" witht he picture after I've done it, even though I know something isn't quite right. I need people like you to point them out to me! So thank you so much!
xxx
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You're very welcome
Very interesting... I like that idea a lot
I've recently started worshiping my anatomy book xD It helps incredibly much when drawing out the proportions etc, and it also helps me see better what exactly needs tweaking. So like you said: Practice, practice, practice 
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Yes, practice. Luckily I have many friends who are willing to sit for me. It IS much easier to do other people - I do think that we have preconceptions of our own appearance (since we spend so much time looking at our reflections! atleast I'm aware that I do!) it's hard to be objective about it.
I like this idea of a lily. Perhaps, instead of this stylised black flower, I can have a lily instead. Even just an implicaiton of a lily - not so stand out-ish as the red rose but softer edges, blending into the tan/brown colour of the background. Yes, better balance. I don't think I'll return to this painting for a while, I have others on the go but certainly I think the time will come when I want to re-visit this and I will remember your suggestion. If I may, I shall send you a link to it when it's ready?
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Definitely! I can't imagine trying to draw myself AS myself. I use photos of me for references sometimes, but I never actually intend for it to be me as much as represent me.
That sounds like a great idea! It would probably help a lot
I'd love to see it finished, yes! But no need to hurry
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Thank you so much once again! If you're ever trying to kill time, draw yourself in the mirror. It's an interesting experience! x
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That would probably be a fun thing to do for practice
Oh, and no problem at all
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very beauty!
I loved the contrast of the colors!
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