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DeviantArtSecret — Secret. 6521
Published: 2009-07-12 20:25:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 2478; Favourites: 49; Downloads: 1
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Comments: 76
Its not as easy as just stopping. But its really worth it to stop. I've gone what like... 4 months without cutting.. and God.. it feels so good to know that I don't have to hurt myself anymore.
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I'm so happy for you
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That's what I tell my friends but you're the first person to tell me.
I hope I can believe it.
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My friends don't understand cutting, mainly because they've never been on the level to understand it, whether it's because they've never seen reason too or just don't want too..
They, like you, think it's pointless.
ST, I'm sorry you are getting a bit of a hard time on this secret, and I understand why you think it's pointless, but I really hope you have some sort of understanding of the cutters point of view on this, too.
While it is easy to tell someone to stop, it isn't easy for them. It isn't '
Whether it's a good or bad reason.
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*pointless
Fricken smilies.
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i don't get this, cause just cause its pointless to you, doesn't mean it is to the cutter.
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It's not that easy, they need to be ready to stop.
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You know what? It's really not. that. easy.
Can a smoker just say "oh yeah, I'm not gonna smoke anymore" or an alcoholic just stop drinking out of the blue?
It's called addiction for a reason.
If they want to stop, they will try, if they don't, they will not. We are our worst critics, we're not just gonna believe we're better than it because you say so. That's what we're like. I'm 3 months clean now, and it still hits me all the time. I had been trying so hard for months before that. And that is how hard it is. It's not just how you feel, it's how just a little negative thought can make you think you need it just one more time. I swear, I wish it were that easy to stop. I really do.
It may seem pointless, but... I actually genuinely believe that without, I'd be dead right now. But at the same time, I know it was bad for me. That sounds a bit confusing.. it makes more sense in my mind. But I mean, if it was pointless, why the hell would someone do it? And I know I did it for a reason. I know that all the people I know who do, they do it for a reason too. I know that a lot of them are struggling to stop, and some a struggling to stay stopped, and the better ones, they just don't anymore. But they all had a reason. Perhaps to you it might not seem like a good enough reason, but most of the time, it's a coping mechanism like any other. Like alcohol, like someome starving themselves until they have nothing left, like drugs, like all of those. And once you start, it's so hard to stop.
Sorry if I went on a bit..
I just had to put my opinion across.
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the cutter that i wrote this for is cutting pointlessly.
he told me so.
i've dealt with people who faced addictions far worse than cutting all my life.
so i know that telling them to stop isn't going to work.
but for once i'm telling stop it to the only person smart enough to understand because he really is too good for all the shit he's gotten into, cutting especially.
i know its more complicated than just saying stop it but thats all the secret could allow.
sorry i went off a bit.
i just want people to understand it a little better.
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Okay, thank you for clearing that up a bit.
I wouldn't call one addiction "worse" than another though. I've faced a few myself, and though cutting wouldn't be worst for me, it's which one affects you the most.
I'm sorry he can be so much like that. It's awful. I suppose some people just got to figure it out themselves - even if it goes downhill, it might come back up again.
Ah a wasted long rant I made earlier
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well, it's not as easy as it looks. trust me, been there and still there.
it's not as easy as it looks, and true we can do better and such but like every one else has stated it's not easy. it is an addiction.
right now im in between, im kinda better but i'm afraid if something tht i cant take happens i will fall again. oh well
but seriously, before you go saying just quit, learn more about it
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just wanted to say, I agree with you so much!
&& to write love on her arms 
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They're the BEST.
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ST, it's more complicated than that. much more complicated.
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Spoken like someone who knows nothing about cutting. "You are so much better than that" is true, and it is a wonderful truth. Thank you for saying it. But at the same time, cutting is not pointless. It's the only way some people have of coping. Learning to stop cutting for me involved more accepting that it had a purpose in my life, then learning to find something else to fill that hole.
You may as well be saying "Just stop drinking" to an alcoholic or "just stop using" to a drug addict. It's an addiction, not a habit, and it's not as simple as many people think.
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i do know about cutting.
i said cutting is pointless because the person this secret is aimed at believes so.
there are far better alternatives for coping than bodily harm.
i know that saying just stop it doesn't work.
i've tried that on people i loved many times (involving smoking and drinking) and i know it doesnt work.
but with the cutter more than just STOP IT.
its just not in this secret.
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Thank goodness, there are still some people that know better. Kudos!
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I know ST probably had good intentions - but unless you've been there yourself, you have no idea how it feels to be a cutter. You can't just quit, it's not that simple. This 'secret' pissed me off, honestly
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i'm sorry that it pissed you off.
i've never cut but i know what it feels like to have to hurt yourself in order to feel better.
i could never cut because blood makes me sick but i've done many many other things.
i realize it isn't the same thing but pretty damn close.
i also realize that just stop it isn't easy.
but this was a secret. i can only say so much.
stop it was the easy way to say everything i needed to get across.
its not like i'm some unfeeling bitch who just says stop it because i don't want to deal with the problem.
Deviantartsecret only allows me to say so much.
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it's nice of you.. but you can't say it's pointless if you haven't been there, believe me.
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No. It's not pointless. If it was pointless it wouldn't happen
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ST, I really do wish it was that simple.
I'm not trying to sound rude at all, but for all of you who are saying "I know that it's an addiction, but you should really get help" that's not easy, either. Cutting is a form of release, much like playing guitar or exercising, unfortunately cutting is a dangerous one. I would know. I don't cut anymore, thankfully, but when I did, I can't explain to you how good it made me feel. It brought me back to reality, and made me want to take control of my life again. It reminded me that I wasn't in a bad dream. And when you're so dead inside that you can't feel anything else, pain is all you have left.
So please don't say things like "Stop it." or "Just get help." Because we want to get help. But it becomes a part of you, and you want to get rid of it, but you're afraid to, because it's all you know.
It took me months to finally ask for help. And many months more to finally heal. Cutters are worth so much more. We all are.
Anyway, I'll stop ranting. I just wanted to express my feelings on the issue.
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ST, i agree with part of your secret, the one that reads "you are so much better than that." But in all honesty, it's easier said than done. If you really want someone to stop, saying "stop it!!!" is not going to help one bit. It takes a lot of love, a lot of trust, faith and confidence along with a huge amount of support to get someone to stop cutting. It is not that easy! If you need to help a cutter, try understanding why they do it, how they feel when they do it, what they're trying to escape. Help them with the original problem, and more than anything, GIVE THEM YOUR LOVE=EXPRESS IT. Hold them tight and keep saying you care, keep telling them how important they are, keep telling them how much they matter.
Understanding, not shocked expressions and rejection, is the ONLY way to ask a cutter to stop cutting. Please understand this, ST. please
If you need more information/help with dealing with knowing someone who cuts, please note me.
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Cutters know its pointless and stupid to do. But like the above posts, its an addiction.
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I agree. There's so many people that do it, sometimes I think certian cases are perhaps a little over dramatic. 
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you know, I got really upset the other day and I found myself crying, stood at the basin with a razor blade in my hand...
I forced myself to think of my friends, family and others that I'd be letting down. And realised that the person that upset me wasn't worth being a line on my arm.
I'm proud of myself for that moment, and I'm thankful to my friends.
Hope this helps <3
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it's not that fucking easy.
don't you think we want to stop? of course.
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Then try to get help. If you really wanted to stop you would try to find help somewhere before it is too late.
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we wish we could just "stop" but its not that easy..
as many of us know already.
its an addiction like any other. a smoker doesnt just "stop" smoking. its wired into them.
but so far a month wiothout, so im trying
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St I hear you loud and clear...
I only wish that a lot of people I know would stop...but they wont' or can't... Sometimes I jsut can't do enough for them..
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ah... I used to cut, but it was because I like the taste of blood.. but I didn't want to admit that to people, so everyone thought I was depressed... so.. I quit ._.
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I haven't cut but it's hard for me just to say that it's pointless. There are better alternatives, yes, but I won't just think to myself that all cutters have no idea what they're cutting for.
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Like a lot of things, it's hard to understand something like this until you've been there. While I don't agree that it's an addiction, I do think it's a compulsion - one that can be bloody hard to ignore. When you're at the bottom of a pit of despair, and you KNOW that there's this one thing that will make you stop hurting, it is so hard not to do because you just want it to stop.
However, I have very little (read:no) respect for the people that do it because 'omg mi frend did it nd her scars lookd totaly cool rite?'
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I've tried telling this to my friend but she doesn't listen D:
I agree with you completely, ST.
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and this is coming from someone who has not gone through such a thing, correct?
an addiction to self injury is hard to understand unless you are going through it. for many it's the only relief they have. it's best to leave them be...try to understand..i know it sounds bad, but saying things like this to them won't necessarily help..
but, no one should do this to themselves if they have a choice...i learned that the hard way..
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I am a recovering self injurer and I could have written this secret.
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For a lot of people, you can't just stop. It's an addiction and it's very hard to overcome. Just like trying to stop smoking/drinking/etc. It takes time and a lot of effort to be able to stop. And even then people still slip up. It's hard.
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