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Djoseph β€” 2010 January collection
Published: 2010-01-03 15:24:18 +0000 UTC; Views: 323; Favourites: 5; Downloads: 6
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Description 1
new year
falling snow veils
the full moon

2
clear white
until finally landing
grey

3
snowflakes
a millions frozen needles
in my face

4
heavy footsteps
through the snow
approaching
my bus
departing

5
clear blue sky
every breath of life
white

6
snow covered roofs
shining white too
full moon

7
swe:
Uppsalaluften
mΓ€ttad med snΓΆ
och kajor

eng:
the Uppsala air
thick with falling snow
and Jackdaws
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Comments: 16

the-beastie [2010-02-08 15:58:09 +0000 UTC]

this is a lovely collection. I particularly like #1 and #7. sounds like you've had a lot of snow!

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Djoseph In reply to the-beastie [2010-02-13 23:21:16 +0000 UTC]

Why thank you.

Yeah, it's been unusually snowy this year, especially for the south of Sweden. Last winter was nothing like this.

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saiun [2010-01-31 20:59:17 +0000 UTC]

I like that you posted #7 in Swedish and English. Swedish must be similar to German because I was actually able to get the gist of the first two lines without reading the English version. Very cool!

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Djoseph In reply to saiun [2010-02-01 21:14:17 +0000 UTC]

That is very much true since Swedish and German have the same roots, and the German language had a huge impact on Swedish in the 13th and 14th century. Learning Swedish is a snap for someone who already knows German ().

Glad that you like it. I'm so used to write haiku straight in English since I started posting here. I'm trying to write more in Swedish now and it's great fun to start digging in to the nuances and quirks of my native tongue again.

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Ahavati [2010-01-31 18:24:18 +0000 UTC]

the new year's moon was a blue moon. i believe i'd change 'the full' to 'blue' in No 1. then (in addition to expanded imagery) the syllables would align between L1 and L3.

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Djoseph In reply to Ahavati [2010-02-01 21:03:41 +0000 UTC]

Aha, so that's what it means. Never really knew the origins for that saying about "once in a blue moon".
I like your suggestion since it, as you say, expand on the imagery. Not sure if I care about syllable length matching, kinda like how it reads out loud right now, but I'll change it anyhow in favour of the bigger picture.
Thanks a lot for commenting.

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rlkirkland [2010-01-31 02:15:47 +0000 UTC]

I like your pieces 'med' Swe. 'och' Eng.
I like the images too.

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Djoseph In reply to rlkirkland [2010-01-31 20:29:13 +0000 UTC]

Always nice to add a little local touch to things.
I'm working on some material (and courage) to submit to some Swedish journal. Once I can find one that is.
As far as I know there's only one dedicated to just haiku and the likes.

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rlkirkland In reply to Djoseph [2010-01-31 22:10:11 +0000 UTC]

Well, even if just one, I think you have developed enough to have a good shot at being published.

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Djoseph In reply to rlkirkland [2010-02-01 20:58:24 +0000 UTC]

That's very kind of you to say. But I know you well enough to know that you mean it as well.

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rlkirkland In reply to Djoseph [2010-02-01 21:45:18 +0000 UTC]

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Djoseph In reply to rlkirkland [2010-02-02 22:33:28 +0000 UTC]

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saiun [2010-01-28 03:57:58 +0000 UTC]

I like 1 and 3 particularly.

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 1

Djoseph In reply to saiun [2010-01-29 16:29:55 +0000 UTC]

Glad to hear that, and thanks for the

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rlkirkland [2010-01-03 16:12:11 +0000 UTC]

Oh oh...
Your 'Blue Moon' was white

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Djoseph In reply to rlkirkland [2010-01-05 04:11:53 +0000 UTC]

As a sheet.

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0