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PearlyOwl [2017-09-09 12:00:33 +0000 UTC]

Overall

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Originality

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Howdy from ProjectComment !

Hi again! Lovely to see more of your work!

First of all, I'd like to say how much I enjoy a wholesome colouring style like yours! It gives a piece a very well finished look, which draws the viewer's attention.

One problem that may arise from this style, however, is a lack of variety in the tone which can cause the character to be lost in the background. Personally, I struggle with backgrounds, but you have had a clear intent which resonates with the LOK universe. I can tell your style applies a softer highlight and shading, which makes the overall character appear cohesive and bright, however in this piece as opposed to your animal Korrasami commission, I can see you wanted to apply a shadow to make Asami more 3-dimensional. While the positioning of Asami's shadow is perfect, making it less blurry and more definite would have helped differentiate between the shadow on the wall and the shading on Asami's clothes. I don't know what program you used, so what I'm about to say might be a bit difficult for you, if your program doesn't have the utility:

I'm assuming that you didn't have as easy access to layering since Asami's shadow doesn't hug her form like it should; by her foot and waist, the shadow seems to taper instead of continuing confidently. If you can, try to do the shadow before colouring, so the shadow appears underneath - I know this is especially difficult if you haven't done the character design yet! Keep practicing shadows, because they can be a great asset to any piece! I'm glad you added it here, instead of missing it completely, as it gives your piece extra dimension!

I think your design and construct of this idea was brilliant! Asami's pose presents her surprise and the awkwardness of the situation, matching her wonderfully shocked expression. Your clothing design works very well, and I believe with a little more practice you'll definitely be able to progress to the next level without any direction from me! My favourite is Asami's gauntlet and hair; her hair seems very lush and voluminous from your highlights which give off a rounded effect! The metallic detail on her gauntlet is fantastic - everything about it is great! Just remember to add more shading under her skirt next time, even though it's great you've used a darker shade instead of black, I think that it would be even better if it was darker, to the degree of difference on her collar and the top of her boots! The gauntlet looks really good to me because of the amount of contrast and shading you applied to her palm and across her wrist - it would be amazing to see if you were able to use this level of contrast across Asami's whole body!!

I won't say much about the background because I love the way you've added a general shading to the wall making it darker in the bottom right. It's also great to see you know the rules of shading three-dimensional objects with the background pillars! My parting advice would be to be more confident in shading, and don't be afraid to go for darker, more definite shadows - I believe this could make your work bolder and give the characters more volume!

It's lovely to see artwork from TLOK always, and yours is so fresh and original! I look forward to the other 5 (?) parts of this sequence and enjoying more of your well developed and unique style.

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PG1224 [2020-01-08 15:47:12 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad you studied the horse anatomy

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Luna-the-Zekrom [2017-10-05 19:09:41 +0000 UTC]

Hello!  I’m here from with some constructive criticism.

First of all, I love the concept of the multi-part depiction of transformation.  I think I’ve commented on one of your similar pieces before.  The other one was good, too, but I think that this one shows the transition better and that you’ve improved a lot!  The fingers fusing into a hoof is a particularly nice touch.  I like how shocked her expression is as she’s looking at what’s happening to her hand.

I also love her outfit!  The varying textures in the bunched pants, smooth tights, and ruffled skirt make the character interesting to look at beyond the hoof she’s developing.  The shading on the clothing looks mostly good, although it looks a little dull at the bottom of the character’s skirt, mostly because it blends into the shadowed area at the base of the wall.  Making the skirt just a little lighter would probably go a long way in helping the character stand out better.

I like that she casts a shadow on the floor and wall behind her, but I think the rest of the shading in the background (between her feet and near the edges of the picture) is both distracting and unnecessary.  It gives the impression that there are other objects in the room casting shadows, and causes confusion regarding the light source.  The shadows on the wall and the character’s leggings indicate that the light is coming from the right side of the picture, probably from a slight angle, but the extra shadows make that hard to tell.  When you’re shading, try to be more aware of where the light is coming from and use that to determine where the shadows should be cast.

Furthermore, the contrast in the background pulls attention away from the character, especially since her outfit is similar in shade to the floor and the beams.  Similarly, the gauntlet she’s wearing is difficult to distinguish from the column behind it.  I think a lighter flooring, maybe a soft gray, would fix that problem.  Or maybe change the outfit to match the color scheme of the first image, which doesn’t bring up the same contrast issues as yours does, especially if this picture is meant to be a direct continuation of the previous one.   If you can’t change it now, don’t worry about it, but definitely keep that in mind next time.  It’s important to think about the character’s design when coloring the background so the hues don’t overlap!  

Despite my critique, I think this picture is impressive overall, and like I said before, you’ve improved since last time.  Keep up the great work!

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BigMac1212 [2017-09-28 03:50:37 +0000 UTC]

I'm noticing a change with Asami.

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PearlyOwl [2017-09-09 12:12:17 +0000 UTC]

 Hiya I just realised my comment may have sounded super harsh because I forgot to read through it and also I didn't have a good look at this piece outside of the critique platform - because it's zoomed in so much I didn't consider how well balanced the piece is as a whole, and instead combed through the finer detailed unwittingly! Please take my critique with a pinch of salt, because I didn't mention how lovely your positioning and proportion was!


- ProjectComment     

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Kiramichelist [2017-08-26 22:56:29 +0000 UTC]

Hey! I'm coming from project comments!
First I'll say that I really like your art style, your lineart is really clean, the colors match together and shadings are really smooth and well made!
I won't point out the simplicity of the background as it's a collab, but I'm sure with the skills you've shown with the character, you can make a more detailed and impressive background, looking forward to it in your future works! ^^
Also (sorry I'm a bit finicky) the way her pants fall seems a bit ''too much'', perhaps doing less folds could help it looking more ''natural''.
Out of it, your drawing is really pleasing to look at, keep it up!

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salo14 [2017-08-23 08:35:30 +0000 UTC]

Great work, she always reminded me of a horse if I imagined her as an animal 

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BigMac1212 [2017-08-22 02:07:14 +0000 UTC]

No horsing around with this TF.

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Kathalia [2017-08-20 03:50:14 +0000 UTC]

Going to need to step up my game for part 3 it seems!

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lordbwargle [2017-08-18 05:26:28 +0000 UTC]

Um...it....uh, I mean...her....
*quickly leafs through a dictionary*
I imagine this sequence will prove all the neigh-sayers wrong!
Srsly, though, this looks to be fun!

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NADMH [2017-08-17 22:45:02 +0000 UTC]

An hippo, now a horse... it seem that Asami is a good victim^^

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tffan01 [2017-08-17 21:50:30 +0000 UTC]

She shouldn't be horsing around so much.

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