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envygrrl — Bedroom Flower Gardens
Published: 2004-03-27 18:30:35 +0000 UTC; Views: 232; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 14
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Description His chest
rises and falls
with the seconds,
deliberate attempts at winning her heart;
the shoes are put away,
but the laces are untied
and he knows it.

the brokenness of her is felt by all sides,
four sides, dancing in the black and white classic
portraits of movies
and he knows this.
he knows the way the sun will cast upon her face,
the manner in which the shadows move,
like Japanese puppets, entertaining
the outside through the inside

he'll hold her hand for hours and glimpse at her with a knowing stare,
always knowing, and searching, and evolving
into more than questions
and answers,

the door will slam closed,
he will climb into bed,
the harshness of conversation will come to a standstill:
and he will hold her; all the veins, the skin, the arteries,
pulling the pieces together.
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Comments: 5

wanderingtruths [2004-06-16 22:24:41 +0000 UTC]

very very good. i enjoyed this one very much...do continue writing this way, it is unbelievable....btw, love the sig.

Jonathan

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Lucis [2004-03-28 03:54:25 +0000 UTC]

This is vivid, well written, and totally intriguing. I LOVE IT! I love the imagery of the movie bouncing off the walls.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

soulwrai [2004-03-27 20:55:48 +0000 UTC]

very very strong piece...impressive i like it

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

wildoats [2004-03-27 18:34:38 +0000 UTC]

He knows way too much.
And: whoops: ballad without a flourishing subject matter? I would enjoy some subtler dramatic tension.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

envygrrl In reply to wildoats [2004-03-28 01:22:03 +0000 UTC]

It was meant as a depiction of a situation. Some things just are.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0