Description
Story of a girl that wanted to share and create art with others, but got sucked up by her feelings.
I always scold myself for feeling jealous of others or having surperior thoughts. I know it isn't worth it, wasting time on feeling jealous of someone or anything else.
They still show up in my mind though and I hate it. I truly wish I never had them, but they never tend to stop. This feeling in my chest. I really care too much. I'm in therapy right now and when I get my other problems sorted, I'll bring this up. I hope it can be fixed.
Feeling jealous is human and I think it is okay to feel so, but it just hunts me for 2 years already and I can't bear it anymore. It makes me not want to draw and I easily give up on projects because of it.
I should draw for myself, not for others. I still try to learn so. I try to love what I create. I hope it will eventually happen and I'll care less about this kind of thing.
Try to love your own art and don't think much about how others are better than you, just focus on your improvement.
Thank you for reading, take care //
+ I published this earlier on tumblr and there was more disussion. I did some research because of that. You can look into this videos, they helped me see the issue in a new light:
youtu.be/zk6gsJaNvs0
youtu.be/N0GHn_lK_D8
youtu.be/0Fc28nRdhcY
Hope this helps!
Comments: 12
KlaraKawaiiPotato [2020-05-03 20:12:30 +0000 UTC]
god, i relate to this so much.
feeling jealous and frustrated is okay! it’s valid to think thoughts like those; for example, i’m not even at a point where i really like my own art, yet i’ll think ”why do they have a bigger following than me? my style is more unique” or ”they are so overrated, they’re just lucky to have gotten noticed” while i KNOW i also love their art, while they 100% deserve all the followers and the support. it’s not something i actually mean, it’s simply jealous thoughts - and that’s okay. like you say, we are all human and we can’t help it.
in the end, what matters is that you yourself have fun - i’m struggling with that, because i often draw for others more than myself. i’m distracted thinking about what others want to see from me, what will get more people to watch me and look at my content, but i’m learning. it’s okay to think as you want, so long as you don’t hurt anybody - which you aren’t, and neither am i (or at least, i know that logically, but my feelings disagree lol. working on that too).
it’s going to take time, because sadly, a whole lot of luck is needed to be recognised - but please know that you’re at the ’big guy’s’ level in skill. soon enough, people will notice you! love you, good luck <3
remember to take care of yourself! <33
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Est1Miyamae In reply to KlaraKawaiiPotato [2020-05-04 09:35:00 +0000 UTC]
Thank you, Klara ywy <3
I don't exactly know what to answer, since your words pretty much summing up everything, you said it well
Instead, I'll say, I wish for you to have more fun with art :3 Your work is beautiful~
And I am not sure if I am at 'big guy's' skill level, but it is very nice thing to hear, thank you, dear ywy hehe, makes me blush to hear it from
someone so amazing as you >///>
Hope both us can grow and be recognised one day!
I love you too!
Take care~
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Est1Miyamae In reply to shisuriyoko [2020-05-03 18:27:33 +0000 UTC]
*hugs back*
Thank you, dear.
Your words make me feel better.
Thank you for caring! I really appriciate it ^^
I'll push forward and then one day, I hope those feelings dissapear completely.
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Est1Miyamae In reply to MrETheComic [2020-05-03 18:25:26 +0000 UTC]
True :3
Though sadly my thoughts cannot accept that y-y)\
Even though I know this, the train of thoughts always goes through my head.
I'll keep looking for a way to learn that too so one day I can think that as well.
I'm glad you found your way though <3
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OmegaArts13 [2020-05-03 13:33:55 +0000 UTC]
*Hugs*
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