HOME | DD

Description
Life, is very simple.
As a kid do what you are told.
When you are no longer so little
You get to break free of that mould

Unless you have a father
Who can’t make up his mind
You can try not to be a bother
And this is tricky you may find.

The line of perfect is so thin. You need to try to humour him-
You might hear words along these lines
Probably many many times

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

Look at the mess you just made,
You’re lucky that mum knows first aid
Know that you don’t deserve the help
You’ve made it so hard for yourself

I showed you every step to this
It shouldn’t have been hit or miss
You only had to do it right
It’s your fault that this caused a fight!

I see you wasting people’s time,
you can’t be called a child of mine. I need to see you-

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Dont EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

Why aren’t you that confident
You’re meant to be independant
There’s no room to rely on me
This isn’t who you’re meant to be!

I want you to go out and just
Grab the world by its balls and guts
And if you come back home to me
You’d better bring a huge trophy!!

Wait- how did the, door get left open huh?
You put the egg, carton in the fridge wrong
I see how you’re, becoming oh so slack!
Now I need, for that child to come back

I see you getting out of line, you can’t be called a child of mine. I want to see you-

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

How could you have messed this up?
You’re such a stupid little fuck
All I asked was a simple task
You’ve only managed to do half!

If you did what I told you to
I wouldn’t have gave up on you
But since you’re such a useless boy
No one would consider you to employ!

I see you wasting people’s time,
you can’t be called a child of mine. I need to see you-

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Dont EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

I have a job lined up for you
I know you’ll know just what to do
You make your own decisions now
Don’t lie to me, you do know how!

You’ve always been a selfish bitch
So surely you can handle this
I know you’ll do it perfectly
Cause this is who you’ve always been!

Wait- did you just, ask somebody’s advice?
You’re so lucky, that they chose to be nice
They didn’t though? You had that coming child
You’re way to bold, its like you’re running wild!

I see you getting out of line, you can’t be called a child of mine. I want to see you-

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

And also

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Don’t EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

This really can’t be all that hard
You’re acting like such a retard

How dare you cry in front of me
I know your attention seeking

Know that I can see right through you
Don’t say you don’t know what you do

You’re taking advantage of me
Some child you turned out to be

You OVER reacted
Don’t WEAR that bandage
Or CUT where I can see

IM the parent
YOU’RE the child
Don’t YOU talk back to me

You’re SO sensitive,
You MAKE me look bad,
Say YOUR apology

Fuck OFF already
With THOSE tear stained cheeks,
You’re SUCH a cry baby

I never yelled at you that loud
You need to come and make me proud

Ill let you try all this again
Just get it right this time
Or
This will never end…

The boy was trying his best, but... It's hard to give something up when you are still relying on it, because nothing around you ever changes. Guilt isn't a sufficient motivator. Fear almost is, but when you're in the moment, some fears can appear not bigger but at least more immediate than hell. It's not an excuse by any means. Excuses, and reasons why, and whether or not it was up to him at all or whether or not he had a choice won't get him out of it in God's eyes. It's all his fault. He only needed to behave, be a good child, do what his parents said, be the thing that they asked him to be not the things that they tell him he is because its meant to be so easy to be good but every time he tries it doesn't work out and theres still something wrong that he would never had thought of and the only reason he is inthismessisbecauseHeSjUSTnoTgOOdenOUghandTheONLythinGLEFTISFORHIMTOACTUALLYDIEANDFINALLYSEETHEPLACETHATHEKNOWSHEWASDOOMEDTOGO.
rinse.
.
.
repeat.
and carry on.
as a corpse. to make up for what you have done.

It hurts. What's happening? I don't know! But it hurts. As if God let me fall. If I was on the ground already there wouldn't be so far to fall. I can only blame myself, I have done the wrong thing. What do they say, they say turn the other cheek! But as hard as I try to stay out of trouble. it finds me. Pushes me closer to the edge and my mouth is shut, my face is soft, I let it be, but then I'm left alone and I let myself tip that little bit further, and bleed by my own hands as I tumble off the edge. Because it's just too hard to hold on to that. I'd rather it happen here in this room alone instead of risking it the next time someone gets mad at me. Theres nothing solid, nothing to grasp. But it's funny how such a small piece of metal can feel like such a strong anchor to hold to. Comfort or security if only a little. I don't feel okay when they take it away. It's like being left to tread water or to fall because there is nothing. Nothing to grasp, I fall until I get a new one.

Description
Life, is very simple.
As a kid do what you are told.
When you are no longer so little
You get to break free of that mould

Unless you have a father
Who can’t make up his mind
You can try not to be a bother
And this is tricky you may find.

The line of perfect is so thin. You need to try to humour him-
You might hear words along these lines
Probably many many times

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

Look at the mess you just made,
You’re lucky that mum knows first aid
Know that you don’t deserve the help
You’ve made it so hard for yourself

I showed you every step to this
It shouldn’t have been hit or miss
You only had to do it right
It’s your fault that this caused a fight!

I see you wasting people’s time,
you can’t be called a child of mine. I need to see you-

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Dont EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

Why aren’t you that confident
You’re meant to be independant
There’s no room to rely on me
This isn’t who you’re meant to be!

I want you to go out and just
Grab the world by its balls and guts
And if you come back home to me
You’d better bring a huge trophy!!

Wait- how did the, door get left open huh?
You put the egg, carton in the fridge wrong
I see how you’re, becoming oh so slack!
Now I need, for that child to come back

I see you getting out of line, you can’t be called a child of mine. I want to see you-

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

How could you have messed this up?
You’re such a stupid little fuck
All I asked was a simple task
You’ve only managed to do half!

If you did what I told you to
I wouldn’t have gave up on you
But since you’re such a useless boy
No one would consider you to employ!

I see you wasting people’s time,
you can’t be called a child of mine. I need to see you-

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Dont EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

I have a job lined up for you
I know you’ll know just what to do
You make your own decisions now
Don’t lie to me, you do know how!

You’ve always been a selfish bitch
So surely you can handle this
I know you’ll do it perfectly
Cause this is who you’ve always been!

Wait- did you just, ask somebody’s advice?
You’re so lucky, that they chose to be nice
They didn’t though? You had that coming child
You’re way to bold, its like you’re running wild!

I see you getting out of line, you can’t be called a child of mine. I want to see you-

DO what I say,
NO more questions,
DO you understand?

LISTEN to me,
JUST obey me
Or ILL give you the hand

And also

GO do better,
HAVE self esteem,
DO your best for me

MAKE me proud now,
Don’t EVER have doubts,
Be THE best you can be

This really can’t be all that hard
You’re acting like such a retard

How dare you cry in front of me
I know your attention seeking

Know that I can see right through you
Don’t say you don’t know what you do

You’re taking advantage of me
Some child you turned out to be

You OVER reacted
Don’t WEAR that bandage
Or CUT where I can see

IM the parent
YOU’RE the child
Don’t YOU talk back to me

You’re SO sensitive,
You MAKE me look bad,
Say YOUR apology

Fuck OFF already
With THOSE tear stained cheeks,
You’re SUCH a cry baby

I never yelled at you that loud
You need to come and make me proud

Ill let you try all this again
Just get it right this time
Or
This will never end…

The boy was trying his best, but... It's hard to give something up when you are still relying on it, because nothing around you ever changes. Guilt isn't a sufficient motivator. Fear almost is, but when you're in the moment, some fears can appear not bigger but at least more immediate than hell. It's not an excuse by any means. Excuses, and reasons why, and whether or not it was up to him at all or whether or not he had a choice won't get him out of it in God's eyes. It's all his fault. He only needed to behave, be a good child, do what his parents said, be the thing that they asked him to be not the things that they tell him he is because its meant to be so easy to be good but every time he tries it doesn't work out and theres still something wrong that he would never had thought of and the only reason he is inthismessisbecauseHeSjUSTnoTgOOdenOUghandTheONLythinGLEFTISFORHIMTOACTUALLYDIEANDFINALLYSEETHEPLACETHATHEKNOWSHEWASDOOMEDTOGO.
rinse.
.
.
repeat.
and carry on.
as a corpse. to make up for what you have done.

It hurts. What's happening? I don't know! But it hurts. As if God let me fall. If I was on the ground already there wouldn't be so far to fall. I can only blame myself, I have done the wrong thing. What do they say, they say turn the other cheek! But as hard as I try to stay out of trouble. it finds me. Pushes me closer to the edge and my mouth is shut, my face is soft, I let it be, but then I'm left alone and I let myself tip that little bit further, and bleed by my own hands as I tumble off the edge. Because it's just too hard to hold on to that. I'd rather it happen here in this room alone instead of risking it the next time someone gets mad at me. Theres nothing solid, nothing to grasp. But it's funny how such a small piece of metal can feel like such a strong anchor to hold to. Comfort or security if only a little. I don't feel okay when they take it away. It's like being left to tread water or to fall because there is nothing. Nothing to grasp, I fall until I get a new one.