HOME | DD

Description
So I said that there would be some familiar faces in the "game".. most of you will recognize them Hope you like this..

BIOS

KAREN WALKER, AGE UNKNOWN, SOCIALITE
Will & Grace
Bio: Info about Miss Walker's childhood has been very difficult to retrieve. We know that a certain Patrick Liberhausen was born in Alabama in 1938, and this is the closest name to our subject that we have in the archives. Apparently the young Walker lived with his/her mother for the first 15 years of his life, moved to New York when she/he was a young teen (for unknown reasons, more than likely related to the conning tactics of his/her Mother) and started trying to infiltrate the highest levels of the NY society, probably researching for a rich gentlemen she/he could attach to and live the rest of her/his life in an easy way. This is where finally we have confirmed info about Miss Walker. She meets with the rich Stanley Walker, the two "fall in love" and quickly marry in the closest church. Karen becomes one of the richest socialites of New York, living off her husband's money without any regret. By spending millions and millions in clothes, purses and shoes, Karen has shown who she believes is the most important person in the world: herself.
Characteristics: High pitched voice, selfish manners and, obviously, her fairy friends.
Predictions: Karen will not last very long on the island. She has lived a life attached to others, having no idea on how to provide for herself, and unless she finds someone who can help her in this competition (and I doubt it since her personality is so.. grating), then.. she's done for. Will be surprised to see her make the halfway point.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none.

PEACH, 16 YEARS OLD, PRINCESS
SuperMario
Bio: Known to many as the fabulous princess from the Mushroom Kingdom, Peach has lived a tough life. Born in a village controlled by the evil Bowser, Peach had to prostitute herself on the street to provide for her entire family. Unfortunately, one day, she was called to the castle by the evil emperor, and she was raped for days and days by the massive dragon. However, something unexpected happened. For days she had been stalked by an old italian fuggo on facebook, and she had ignored time after time his requests to meet and have a quick fuck. He had said that she was the love of his life, but 1) she wasn't a romantic girl, 2) he was fug, 3) she needed money for her family, and he was a toddler, not a prince. Boy, was she wrong. While being raped by Bowser, the old italian guy, whose name was Mario, came to save her, sent Bowser away and married her, revealing that he was the prince of the Mushroom Kingdom. From a random whore to the princess of her land.. boy was Peach surprised.
Characteristics: Her fabulous style in clothing, her long blonde hair and her massive hot booty.
Predictions: Peach has lived a tough life as I said previously, and this could potentially help her in this situation. She's not a pissy princess afraid of bugs and dirt. She can get her hands dirty and she can do it WELL. However, she's young, and even though she's physically fit, I'm afraid she's still not mature enough to face this situation.
Chances of Winning: Good

MINERVA, 24, PROSTITUTE
Animaniacs
Bio: Out of all the whores out there, Minerva is certainly the best one around. Unlike Peach, Minerva didn't start off by being a prostitute. Born in a very catholic family in 1987, Minerva was grown up as the perfect daughter. She went to irish school, frequented chruch every sunday and never missed one day of class. She was a hardworker, got As in every subject and never let her parents down. It's true, she didn't have many friends, if any, but does it really matter if you're so successful in everything else you do? Thats what Minerva kept repeating to herself. However, one day her life changed drastically. While leaving school she was approached by a werewolf named William, the most popular jock in school, and was asked if she could him with his homework. Even though it sounded fishy, Minerva agreed, and they both headed back to his house. Things lead to another and ,without even noticing it, Minerva had lost her virginity to him. She was in love. Her life had never been so happy, she was in heaven, but things... changed. Drastically. The next day, while walking to class, she noticed posters everywhere and her heart stopped. CHRISTIAN GIRL MINERVA IS A TOTAL CUMDUMPSTER! MINERVA LIKES TO HAVE HER NIPPLES BITTEN! MINERVA DOESN'T LIKE THE TASTE OF CUM.. SHE LOVES IT! He had betrayed her, and yes, she was sad, but what she wanted most was revenge. She invited him to her place to repeat what they had done the day before and ,while they were going at it, she grabbed a pair of scissors from under the bed and chopped his balls off. Boy, was she in heaven now. Things changed from that day. She never saw her parents again. Never went to church. Left school. She now was doing what she does best. Fuck.
Characteristics: Maneater, perfect body, exceptionally high IQ.
Predictions: Minerva has what it takes to bring this baby home. She absolutely has NO morals, a fit body and is incredibly smart. Her life has taught her never to trust anyone, and I think this lesson is going to help her incredibly in a game like this. Her downfall could possibly be the consequence of her huge ego, which sometimes makes it very hard to see things into.. perspective.
Chances of Winning: Great

REGINA GEORGE, 16, HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT
Mean Girls
Bio: Regina George has always been a lucky girl. Born in a wealthy family, she was raised by having everything she always wanted and maybe more. As soon as she entered high school there was no doubt in anyone's mind that she would be one of the most popular girls the school had ever seen. She had a perfectly shaped body, long blonde hair and a well practiced fake smile she always used with the teachers to higher her not-so-great grades. What she didn't expect was a sick Disney producer that decided to send Lindsay Lohan to her school and fuck up her perfect life. Under the codename "Cady", Lindsay manipulated her, made her look like a gigantic whale and destroyed everything she had fought so hard for. There was nothing that could stop her revenge. Except a Disney happy ending. Without knowing it, everything turned out well and everyone lived happily ever after... except Regina. She didn't forgive OR forget Lindsay, but she always repeated to herself.. revenge is a dish best served cold. And now it was freezing.
Characteristics: Fake, fake, fake.
Predictions: Hell hath no fury like a Regina scorned. No way on earth would we pass on this rivalry, and we want to see it pan out SO BADLY. Even though Regina has had everything served on a golden plate during her life, she's been disrespected, and I think she won't stop until her goal is fulfilled. Lindsay should be scared.
Chances of Winning: Average

LAURA MORETT, 40, CHRISTIAN
Survivor: Samoa
Bio: Born in a typical Las Vegas family, Laura Morett had to fight through her childhood. Being raised by a decadent saggy prostitute and never even meeting her father, she mostly had to care for herself and her little sister Kelly. Being the eldest one, Laura stopped going to school at a very young age to provide for Kelly, as her mother was usually out and ,the few times she came back, she was always in company of some random old man who she strangely brought to her bedroom to get out only several hours later. In these difficult moments of her life, Laura got closer to Jesus. One day, as she was walking back home, she noticed a very skinny guy with a long beard who was waving at her. Initially she just kept moving, but something about him interested her, and she decided it was worth the risk to go and see what he was about. Still to this day Laura pinpoints this as the most important decision of her life. Jesus showed her the light, and her life finally had a meaning. Everything finally was turning out ok.. until Kelly was diagnosed with HIV. Not knowing it, her mother was hiv positive too, and had transmitted the disease to her second daughter. After a couple of months, Laura saw her young sister die right in front of her eyes, not being able to help her in any way other than staying with her until her last breathe. The loss of Kelly was very, very difficult for Laura, but in a way it got her even stronger. She joined the local church, reached out to all the troubled young girls in her neighbourhood and tried to help them by giving them advice and sometimes even a home. Finally her life had a meaning. She would help others, to make her sister proud.
Characteristics: Generous, kind hearted, protective.
Predictions: As much as I like whores, we need the positive forces out there. Laura is such a strong individual, full of life-changing experiences, and I think all of America is gonna root for her. However, she's too nice to survive this. Nice guys unfortunately usually finish last
Chances of Winning: Slim

JIGGLYPUFF, UNKNOWN, POKEMON
Pokemon
Bio: Jigglypuff is a random Jigglypuff.
Characteristics: Easily manipulated, dumb, one note.
Predictions: Who doesn't love the controversial casting choice? <3 Jigglypuff is just so random and fun, I think everyone will LOL by seeing her roll on the island. Maybe she'll roll to victory..? notrly
Chances of Winning: None

MAKOSI MUSAMBASI, 30, NURSE
Big Brother UK: 6
Bio: Makosi means Princess. Makosi means Princess. Makosi means Princess. This is what Makosi Musambasi repeats to herself daily, and it never ceazes to amaze her. How can such a perfect individual live on earth and SO MANY PEOPLE not know about her? There was something so apparently wrong about this, and Makosi knew that it was her mission to let the world know of her existence. Born from a rich family in Africa, Makosi was never a happy girl. She watched african TV 24/7, and all the stars on it were either boring or simply plain forgettable. It angered her to NO END that she was living a normal and boring life, while those fuckin borewhores were on television every day of the week and didn't deserve ANY of the fame they received. She was beautiful. She was interesting. She knew what she wanted. But thing just werent going her way. As much as she loved the motherland, the love wasn't reciprocated, and Makosi ran away from home, with no money or help, but with an undescrivible desire to succeed. Thankfully England was more receptive to it. She immediately enrolled into the Big Brother auditions and, one after another, she received all the calls to get into the house. It was a dream come true. No one would steal her precious airtime and she would do WHATEVER IT TAKES to have it all for herself. Fighting, crying, lying.. nothing was out of reach for Makosi Musambasi. She made it week after week, showed herself as much as she possibly could, and when she finally got out of the house.. the viewers were horrible to her. They booed her. The host insulted her. But Makosi was happy. In her mind this only meant one thing.. she'd made it. Fame was hers.
Characteristics: Famewhore, Entertaining, Very Smart
Predictions: As much as I'd like to see my dear Makosi win this game, I don't see this happening. There's only one thing that Makosi really loves, and thats to be remembered. Winning? i'm not quite sure if this is one of Makosi's prorities.. But if it is, oh boy the others are in BIG TROUBLE.
Chances of Winning: Average

LADY GAGA, 24, SINGER
Bio: STEFANI STOP PLAYING THOSE MADONNA RECORDS, WE NEED TO SLEEP!
She hated them. Her parents did not get her.. at all. Stefani's life had been.. uneventful. Born in a middle class family, Stef did not have the most exciting childhood. She was usually staying at home, watching the television and sometimes going out with some friends from her local school. She lived a normal life, and she was content with it. What she didn't expect was for her life to change so abruptly. While she was walking in the local mall a catchy tune caught her ear, and she immediately followed the sound to the CD store. The song was absolutely amazing.
PAPA DON'T PREACH.. I'M KEEPIN MY BABY..
She was mesmerized by it. It was catchy, it was fun and it was completely different from anything else she had ever heard. Rushing to the counter, she asked who was singing that song.
"her names Madonna. Shes been pretty successful in the last few months"
Madonna.. what a great name. Quickly Stefani became Madonna's number one fan, listening to her records multiple times a day and knowing each and every one of them by heart. But this didn't satisfy her.. she wanted MORE. She wanted to.. be Madonna. After copying some old and forgotten Madonna songs, Stefani started to imitate her image, by looking the craziest possible while still looking hot. Madonna did it, she could too.
After presenting herself to numerous music studios, one of them finally accepted her. She was shocked, nervous and didn't know what to expect..
"whats your name?"
"..."
"whats your artist name"
Stefani never thought of this. She needed one and she needed one fast. But her lips started trembling, her nerves got to her..
"g-a-ga-.-"
"gaga?"
"n-n-o im sor-"
"gaga.. i kinda like it"
A wannabe was born.
Characteristics: Wannabe, Mediocre, Spineless
Predictions: Gaga better not meet with Madonna. If she wanna make it far then she doesnt want to face Miss Ciccone's anger. What most people forget is that behind the makeup Gaga is just a mediocre midclass borewhore, and this will more than likely reflect on how she plays the game.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none

MADONNA, 50, POP ICON
Bio: The Queen of Pop. Thats how everyone called her. Madonna Ciccone lived a life like no other. Born in a typical italian family, Madonna had a drive to succeed like no other person anyone had ever met. Her goal was to become a huge star and nobody could stop her from achieving it. Sure, her voice wasn't the best. She was attractive, but not a classic beauty. She wasn't the most likeable person, was called a bitch an awful lot, but she had to work with what God had given her. She hated people who cried over their appearances, their misfortunes and their overall lives.. you make what you want of yourself as long as you really want it. Madonna knew it well. Producer after producer kept telling her.. "Miss Ciccone your voice is awful". "Your armpits are too hairy". "How can anyone relate to someone like you?" well she hoped nobody could relate to her. She was.. special, and not in a retarded way. After months and months of banging every music producer she met, fame finally came. People started talking about her, her trendy new look, how original her songs were. But Madonna still wasn't satisfied. She wanted the world to talk about her. Every single person on Earth had to worship her. Her journey to the Olympus had just begun.
Characteristics: Driven, Strong, Ambitious
Predictions: Madonna will win this game. If she decides to do so. We could be dealing with the winner here, or we could be dealing with the first boot. It's entirely up to her. And I'm excited.
Chances of Winning: The worse and the best.

SHABBY KATCHADOURIAN, 23, ACTRESS
Big Brother UK 11
Bio: Shabby Katchadourian worships one thing. It starts with a P and ends with Ussy.
Shabby had never gone through the denying phase of her life. At 12 years old, Monica, Shabby's mother, caught her daughter in bed with Shelly, the blonde daughter of their neighbours, who had just arrived the week prior in the appartment complex. However, Monica didn't worry, as they were two young girls experimenting, and it was part of everyones life to see whats out there to become a mature person. However, after a couple of weeks, Monica started getting worried. Sylvia, Jenna, Rachel, Danielle.. all the young girls from the neighbourhood were big fans of the sleeping parties Shabby more than often prepared for them. Monica wasn't worried though, they were young girls, and hormons were kicking into high gear, meaning they would talk and giggle about the boys at school all night long. Unfortunately, this didn't end here. After a couple of years, when Shabby was in high school, Monica had just arrived back home after a long days work. What she heard when she entered the door was a very strange noise coming from upstairs, and she immediately rushed up the stairs to see what was happening. HUMP HUMP HUMP HUMP.
SHABBY IS EVERYTHING OK?
...oh fuck
IS EVERYTHING GOING OK OVER THERE?!
yea mom, me and rene are doing our homework
BUT WAS WHAT THAT SOUND?!
what sound?
THE ONE COMING FROM YOUR BEDROOM!
you're going crazy ma. we're hungry can you make us dinner?
Monica did what she was told, and in a week everything was forgotten. She wasn't worried, the girls were playing around instead of going homework. Its normal at their age. This didn't end here though. One year later, Shabby arrived home after school and told her mom there was someone she had to meet. GREAT, she thought, HER FIRST BOYFRIEND!
ma, this is jessica.
...jessica?
Fuck. Her daughter was a lesbian.
Characteristics: Horny, Delusional, Bipolar
Predictions: oh lord Shabby, where do I begin? We all learned to love Shabby in BBUK11, as much as she was an obnoxious presence and sligtly intimidating. Her aggressive nature unfortunately will not translate well to the Island. Shes gonna be loud, making herself a target, and her life in the game will end abruptly. In the meantime though.. she's going to deliver. Oh yeah.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none.

YZMA, AGE UNKNOWN, WITCH
The Emperors New Groove
Bio: They had paid her over 10 million dollars for it. They told her.. Yzma, its gonna be a huge success, you're gonna be a STAR! She obviously agreed, performed to her best, was a pleasure to direct. The producers said.. Yzma, this movie is going to be great, everyone will absolutely freakin love you! Of course they're gonna love me, I GAVE IT MY ALL! she naively thought. The unthinkable happened though. On the day of the premiere, Yzma was incredibly excited. She could see the fans absolutely loving her, TVs talking about her, maybe even find a young hot guy to marry! This was going to be THE GREATEST DAY OF HER LIFE!
But we all know what happened next. A buffon. Comic relief. The old dumb witch. Thats what she was. No signs of her orchestrating the young emperors demise with truly well thought out plans or how the true ending was her controlling the entire reign and everyone madly loving her. No, they decided to go with the alternate ending.. the one she didn't even want to film.
YZMA UR SO HILAR!!!111!!
OMG YZMA WE LOVE YOU CAN WE TAKE A PIC WITH YOU?!!?
OMG IS THAT YZMA THE CRAZY OLD LADY FROM THE NEW DISNEY MOVIE? SHES SO FUNNAY <333333
ANGER. REGRET. SOLITUDE. DISRESPECT.
Thats what Yzma felt.
She knew who to blame.
Walt Disney.
Characteristics: Incredibly Delusional. Incredibly Dumb. Incredible Cougar.
Predictions: Yzma is just so hilarious. She thinks she's a manipulative evil witch, when in reality, she's so fuckin stupid, but she just doesn't realize it. Yzma is not gonna be a threat in the island. I see her looking for hot young guys and then just slipping by to the end. Winning? nah.
Chances of Winning: Slim

;) (Wink) — Description
So I said that there would be some familiar faces in the "game".. most of you will recognize them Hope you like this..

BIOS

KAREN WALKER, AGE UNKNOWN, SOCIALITE
Will & Grace
Bio: Info about Miss Walker's childhood has been very difficult to retrieve. We know that a certain Patrick Liberhausen was born in Alabama in 1938, and this is the closest name to our subject that we have in the archives. Apparently the young Walker lived with his/her mother for the first 15 years of his life, moved to New York when she/he was a young teen (for unknown reasons, more than likely related to the conning tactics of his/her Mother) and started trying to infiltrate the highest levels of the NY society, probably researching for a rich gentlemen she/he could attach to and live the rest of her/his life in an easy way. This is where finally we have confirmed info about Miss Walker. She meets with the rich Stanley Walker, the two "fall in love" and quickly marry in the closest church. Karen becomes one of the richest socialites of New York, living off her husband's money without any regret. By spending millions and millions in clothes, purses and shoes, Karen has shown who she believes is the most important person in the world: herself.
Characteristics: High pitched voice, selfish manners and, obviously, her fairy friends.
Predictions: Karen will not last very long on the island. She has lived a life attached to others, having no idea on how to provide for herself, and unless she finds someone who can help her in this competition (and I doubt it since her personality is so.. grating), then.. she's done for. Will be surprised to see her make the halfway point.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none.

PEACH, 16 YEARS OLD, PRINCESS
SuperMario
Bio: Known to many as the fabulous princess from the Mushroom Kingdom, Peach has lived a tough life. Born in a village controlled by the evil Bowser, Peach had to prostitute herself on the street to provide for her entire family. Unfortunately, one day, she was called to the castle by the evil emperor, and she was raped for days and days by the massive dragon. However, something unexpected happened. For days she had been stalked by an old italian fuggo on facebook, and she had ignored time after time his requests to meet and have a quick fuck. He had said that she was the love of his life, but 1) she wasn't a romantic girl, 2) he was fug, 3) she needed money for her family, and he was a toddler, not a prince. Boy, was she wrong. While being raped by Bowser, the old italian guy, whose name was Mario, came to save her, sent Bowser away and married her, revealing that he was the prince of the Mushroom Kingdom. From a random whore to the princess of her land.. boy was Peach surprised.
Characteristics: Her fabulous style in clothing, her long blonde hair and her massive hot booty.
Predictions: Peach has lived a tough life as I said previously, and this could potentially help her in this situation. She's not a pissy princess afraid of bugs and dirt. She can get her hands dirty and she can do it WELL. However, she's young, and even though she's physically fit, I'm afraid she's still not mature enough to face this situation.
Chances of Winning: Good

MINERVA, 24, PROSTITUTE
Animaniacs
Bio: Out of all the whores out there, Minerva is certainly the best one around. Unlike Peach, Minerva didn't start off by being a prostitute. Born in a very catholic family in 1987, Minerva was grown up as the perfect daughter. She went to irish school, frequented chruch every sunday and never missed one day of class. She was a hardworker, got As in every subject and never let her parents down. It's true, she didn't have many friends, if any, but does it really matter if you're so successful in everything else you do? Thats what Minerva kept repeating to herself. However, one day her life changed drastically. While leaving school she was approached by a werewolf named William, the most popular jock in school, and was asked if she could him with his homework. Even though it sounded fishy, Minerva agreed, and they both headed back to his house. Things lead to another and ,without even noticing it, Minerva had lost her virginity to him. She was in love. Her life had never been so happy, she was in heaven, but things... changed. Drastically. The next day, while walking to class, she noticed posters everywhere and her heart stopped. CHRISTIAN GIRL MINERVA IS A TOTAL CUMDUMPSTER! MINERVA LIKES TO HAVE HER NIPPLES BITTEN! MINERVA DOESN'T LIKE THE TASTE OF CUM.. SHE LOVES IT! He had betrayed her, and yes, she was sad, but what she wanted most was revenge. She invited him to her place to repeat what they had done the day before and ,while they were going at it, she grabbed a pair of scissors from under the bed and chopped his balls off. Boy, was she in heaven now. Things changed from that day. She never saw her parents again. Never went to church. Left school. She now was doing what she does best. Fuck.
Characteristics: Maneater, perfect body, exceptionally high IQ.
Predictions: Minerva has what it takes to bring this baby home. She absolutely has NO morals, a fit body and is incredibly smart. Her life has taught her never to trust anyone, and I think this lesson is going to help her incredibly in a game like this. Her downfall could possibly be the consequence of her huge ego, which sometimes makes it very hard to see things into.. perspective.
Chances of Winning: Great

REGINA GEORGE, 16, HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT
Mean Girls
Bio: Regina George has always been a lucky girl. Born in a wealthy family, she was raised by having everything she always wanted and maybe more. As soon as she entered high school there was no doubt in anyone's mind that she would be one of the most popular girls the school had ever seen. She had a perfectly shaped body, long blonde hair and a well practiced fake smile she always used with the teachers to higher her not-so-great grades. What she didn't expect was a sick Disney producer that decided to send Lindsay Lohan to her school and fuck up her perfect life. Under the codename "Cady", Lindsay manipulated her, made her look like a gigantic whale and destroyed everything she had fought so hard for. There was nothing that could stop her revenge. Except a Disney happy ending. Without knowing it, everything turned out well and everyone lived happily ever after... except Regina. She didn't forgive OR forget Lindsay, but she always repeated to herself.. revenge is a dish best served cold. And now it was freezing.
Characteristics: Fake, fake, fake.
Predictions: Hell hath no fury like a Regina scorned. No way on earth would we pass on this rivalry, and we want to see it pan out SO BADLY. Even though Regina has had everything served on a golden plate during her life, she's been disrespected, and I think she won't stop until her goal is fulfilled. Lindsay should be scared.
Chances of Winning: Average

LAURA MORETT, 40, CHRISTIAN
Survivor: Samoa
Bio: Born in a typical Las Vegas family, Laura Morett had to fight through her childhood. Being raised by a decadent saggy prostitute and never even meeting her father, she mostly had to care for herself and her little sister Kelly. Being the eldest one, Laura stopped going to school at a very young age to provide for Kelly, as her mother was usually out and ,the few times she came back, she was always in company of some random old man who she strangely brought to her bedroom to get out only several hours later. In these difficult moments of her life, Laura got closer to Jesus. One day, as she was walking back home, she noticed a very skinny guy with a long beard who was waving at her. Initially she just kept moving, but something about him interested her, and she decided it was worth the risk to go and see what he was about. Still to this day Laura pinpoints this as the most important decision of her life. Jesus showed her the light, and her life finally had a meaning. Everything finally was turning out ok.. until Kelly was diagnosed with HIV. Not knowing it, her mother was hiv positive too, and had transmitted the disease to her second daughter. After a couple of months, Laura saw her young sister die right in front of her eyes, not being able to help her in any way other than staying with her until her last breathe. The loss of Kelly was very, very difficult for Laura, but in a way it got her even stronger. She joined the local church, reached out to all the troubled young girls in her neighbourhood and tried to help them by giving them advice and sometimes even a home. Finally her life had a meaning. She would help others, to make her sister proud.
Characteristics: Generous, kind hearted, protective.
Predictions: As much as I like whores, we need the positive forces out there. Laura is such a strong individual, full of life-changing experiences, and I think all of America is gonna root for her. However, she's too nice to survive this. Nice guys unfortunately usually finish last
Chances of Winning: Slim

JIGGLYPUFF, UNKNOWN, POKEMON
Pokemon
Bio: Jigglypuff is a random Jigglypuff.
Characteristics: Easily manipulated, dumb, one note.
Predictions: Who doesn't love the controversial casting choice? <3 Jigglypuff is just so random and fun, I think everyone will LOL by seeing her roll on the island. Maybe she'll roll to victory..? notrly
Chances of Winning: None

MAKOSI MUSAMBASI, 30, NURSE
Big Brother UK: 6
Bio: Makosi means Princess. Makosi means Princess. Makosi means Princess. This is what Makosi Musambasi repeats to herself daily, and it never ceazes to amaze her. How can such a perfect individual live on earth and SO MANY PEOPLE not know about her? There was something so apparently wrong about this, and Makosi knew that it was her mission to let the world know of her existence. Born from a rich family in Africa, Makosi was never a happy girl. She watched african TV 24/7, and all the stars on it were either boring or simply plain forgettable. It angered her to NO END that she was living a normal and boring life, while those fuckin borewhores were on television every day of the week and didn't deserve ANY of the fame they received. She was beautiful. She was interesting. She knew what she wanted. But thing just werent going her way. As much as she loved the motherland, the love wasn't reciprocated, and Makosi ran away from home, with no money or help, but with an undescrivible desire to succeed. Thankfully England was more receptive to it. She immediately enrolled into the Big Brother auditions and, one after another, she received all the calls to get into the house. It was a dream come true. No one would steal her precious airtime and she would do WHATEVER IT TAKES to have it all for herself. Fighting, crying, lying.. nothing was out of reach for Makosi Musambasi. She made it week after week, showed herself as much as she possibly could, and when she finally got out of the house.. the viewers were horrible to her. They booed her. The host insulted her. But Makosi was happy. In her mind this only meant one thing.. she'd made it. Fame was hers.
Characteristics: Famewhore, Entertaining, Very Smart
Predictions: As much as I'd like to see my dear Makosi win this game, I don't see this happening. There's only one thing that Makosi really loves, and thats to be remembered. Winning? i'm not quite sure if this is one of Makosi's prorities.. But if it is, oh boy the others are in BIG TROUBLE.
Chances of Winning: Average

LADY GAGA, 24, SINGER
Bio: STEFANI STOP PLAYING THOSE MADONNA RECORDS, WE NEED TO SLEEP!
She hated them. Her parents did not get her.. at all. Stefani's life had been.. uneventful. Born in a middle class family, Stef did not have the most exciting childhood. She was usually staying at home, watching the television and sometimes going out with some friends from her local school. She lived a normal life, and she was content with it. What she didn't expect was for her life to change so abruptly. While she was walking in the local mall a catchy tune caught her ear, and she immediately followed the sound to the CD store. The song was absolutely amazing.
PAPA DON'T PREACH.. I'M KEEPIN MY BABY..
She was mesmerized by it. It was catchy, it was fun and it was completely different from anything else she had ever heard. Rushing to the counter, she asked who was singing that song.
"her names Madonna. Shes been pretty successful in the last few months"
Madonna.. what a great name. Quickly Stefani became Madonna's number one fan, listening to her records multiple times a day and knowing each and every one of them by heart. But this didn't satisfy her.. she wanted MORE. She wanted to.. be Madonna. After copying some old and forgotten Madonna songs, Stefani started to imitate her image, by looking the craziest possible while still looking hot. Madonna did it, she could too.
After presenting herself to numerous music studios, one of them finally accepted her. She was shocked, nervous and didn't know what to expect..
"whats your name?"
"..."
"whats your artist name"
Stefani never thought of this. She needed one and she needed one fast. But her lips started trembling, her nerves got to her..
"g-a-ga-.-"
"gaga?"
"n-n-o im sor-"
"gaga.. i kinda like it"
A wannabe was born.
Characteristics: Wannabe, Mediocre, Spineless
Predictions: Gaga better not meet with Madonna. If she wanna make it far then she doesnt want to face Miss Ciccone's anger. What most people forget is that behind the makeup Gaga is just a mediocre midclass borewhore, and this will more than likely reflect on how she plays the game.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none

MADONNA, 50, POP ICON
Bio: The Queen of Pop. Thats how everyone called her. Madonna Ciccone lived a life like no other. Born in a typical italian family, Madonna had a drive to succeed like no other person anyone had ever met. Her goal was to become a huge star and nobody could stop her from achieving it. Sure, her voice wasn't the best. She was attractive, but not a classic beauty. She wasn't the most likeable person, was called a bitch an awful lot, but she had to work with what God had given her. She hated people who cried over their appearances, their misfortunes and their overall lives.. you make what you want of yourself as long as you really want it. Madonna knew it well. Producer after producer kept telling her.. "Miss Ciccone your voice is awful". "Your armpits are too hairy". "How can anyone relate to someone like you?" well she hoped nobody could relate to her. She was.. special, and not in a retarded way. After months and months of banging every music producer she met, fame finally came. People started talking about her, her trendy new look, how original her songs were. But Madonna still wasn't satisfied. She wanted the world to talk about her. Every single person on Earth had to worship her. Her journey to the Olympus had just begun.
Characteristics: Driven, Strong, Ambitious
Predictions: Madonna will win this game. If she decides to do so. We could be dealing with the winner here, or we could be dealing with the first boot. It's entirely up to her. And I'm excited.
Chances of Winning: The worse and the best.

SHABBY KATCHADOURIAN, 23, ACTRESS
Big Brother UK 11
Bio: Shabby Katchadourian worships one thing. It starts with a P and ends with Ussy.
Shabby had never gone through the denying phase of her life. At 12 years old, Monica, Shabby's mother, caught her daughter in bed with Shelly, the blonde daughter of their neighbours, who had just arrived the week prior in the appartment complex. However, Monica didn't worry, as they were two young girls experimenting, and it was part of everyones life to see whats out there to become a mature person. However, after a couple of weeks, Monica started getting worried. Sylvia, Jenna, Rachel, Danielle.. all the young girls from the neighbourhood were big fans of the sleeping parties Shabby more than often prepared for them. Monica wasn't worried though, they were young girls, and hormons were kicking into high gear, meaning they would talk and giggle about the boys at school all night long. Unfortunately, this didn't end here. After a couple of years, when Shabby was in high school, Monica had just arrived back home after a long days work. What she heard when she entered the door was a very strange noise coming from upstairs, and she immediately rushed up the stairs to see what was happening. HUMP HUMP HUMP HUMP.
SHABBY IS EVERYTHING OK?
...oh fuck
IS EVERYTHING GOING OK OVER THERE?!
yea mom, me and rene are doing our homework
BUT WAS WHAT THAT SOUND?!
what sound?
THE ONE COMING FROM YOUR BEDROOM!
you're going crazy ma. we're hungry can you make us dinner?
Monica did what she was told, and in a week everything was forgotten. She wasn't worried, the girls were playing around instead of going homework. Its normal at their age. This didn't end here though. One year later, Shabby arrived home after school and told her mom there was someone she had to meet. GREAT, she thought, HER FIRST BOYFRIEND!
ma, this is jessica.
...jessica?
Fuck. Her daughter was a lesbian.
Characteristics: Horny, Delusional, Bipolar
Predictions: oh lord Shabby, where do I begin? We all learned to love Shabby in BBUK11, as much as she was an obnoxious presence and sligtly intimidating. Her aggressive nature unfortunately will not translate well to the Island. Shes gonna be loud, making herself a target, and her life in the game will end abruptly. In the meantime though.. she's going to deliver. Oh yeah.
Chances of Winning: Slim to none.

YZMA, AGE UNKNOWN, WITCH
The Emperors New Groove
Bio: They had paid her over 10 million dollars for it. They told her.. Yzma, its gonna be a huge success, you're gonna be a STAR! She obviously agreed, performed to her best, was a pleasure to direct. The producers said.. Yzma, this movie is going to be great, everyone will absolutely freakin love you! Of course they're gonna love me, I GAVE IT MY ALL! she naively thought. The unthinkable happened though. On the day of the premiere, Yzma was incredibly excited. She could see the fans absolutely loving her, TVs talking about her, maybe even find a young hot guy to marry! This was going to be THE GREATEST DAY OF HER LIFE!
But we all know what happened next. A buffon. Comic relief. The old dumb witch. Thats what she was. No signs of her orchestrating the young emperors demise with truly well thought out plans or how the true ending was her controlling the entire reign and everyone madly loving her. No, they decided to go with the alternate ending.. the one she didn't even want to film.
YZMA UR SO HILAR!!!111!!
OMG YZMA WE LOVE YOU CAN WE TAKE A PIC WITH YOU?!!?
OMG IS THAT YZMA THE CRAZY OLD LADY FROM THE NEW DISNEY MOVIE? SHES SO FUNNAY <333333
ANGER. REGRET. SOLITUDE. DISRESPECT.
Thats what Yzma felt.
She knew who to blame.
Walt Disney.
Characteristics: Incredibly Delusional. Incredibly Dumb. Incredible Cougar.
Predictions: Yzma is just so hilarious. She thinks she's a manipulative evil witch, when in reality, she's so fuckin stupid, but she just doesn't realize it. Yzma is not gonna be a threat in the island. I see her looking for hot young guys and then just slipping by to the end. Winning? nah.
Chances of Winning: Slim