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Haunting-Rose β€” Monsters

Published: 2012-12-13 04:49:24 +0000 UTC; Views: 244; Favourites: 6; Downloads: 1
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Description "Eli! It's time to go home," Mom called, standing in the doorway of my school's, Thunder Lake Elementary, daycare.

"But, Mom..... I'm still playing with my friends!" I whined.

"No buts, Eliora! Come on!" she said, raising her voice. Some of the kids near her stopped playing and stared at her. I sighed, waving to my friends and to my pre-k teacher and then followed Mom out the door.

"What's wrong with you? You haven't wanted to come home for at least a month....." Mom said as we walked down the hallway, the setting sun hitting the blue carpet just right to make the whole hall look blue against the white brick walls. Her voice was mixed with anger and worry.

"I dunno...." I mumbled, scuffing my feet on the now tile floor.

Mom sighed and asked, "Is it because of the monster under the bed?"

"No!" I yelled, my face turning red.

She chuckled to herself and said, "Your brother, Mayir, had a problem like this when he was your age. But it was under his bed."

"Maybe it moved under my bed.....," I said, mostly to myself. Mom just smiled and shook her head.

After dinner, I had to take my bath. I could see my room from where I was in the bathroom in the mirror. That meant I could also see under my bed as well. While I sat in the tub, playing with my toys, Mom was getting my bed ready so I could go to sleep. As she moved my sheets around, I saw a pair of glowing eyes peering out from under the bed. They disappeared when Mom walked in to dry me off.

As Mom finished drying my hair, Mayir stopped by the door and asked, "Are you ready to sleep with the monster lurking under your bed, Eli?"

"Mayir!" Mom yelled. She threw my little rubber duck at him as he ran down the hall to our room, laughing the whole time.

She looked down at me and told me, "Don't worry, honey, there's no monster under the bed."

"But Mom, there is!" I protested.

"He's hairy and has long claws and glowing eyes!" I told her. All she did was shake her head. As she turned away, I saw her face in the mirror. She looked really worried. As I snuggled under my sheets with Billy the goat, I looked over at Mayir. He was working on some homework.

"Mayir?" I asked.

"Yeah?" he asked, not looking up.

"Mom told me that you had a monster under your bed too."

"Yep, but it disappeared for awhile when you were born."

"What did it look like?"

"Umm...... He had glowing white-ish eyes, white fur, and long nails."

"The monster under my bed looks like that too..."

He stopped working and looked at me. We both shrugged. Mom came by and said, "Lights out!" and switched them off, except for my nightlight. I scooted under my covers with Billy the goat and shut my eyes, trying to sleep. A little while passed and I still couldn't fall asleep. I knew Mayir did because he was snoring.

I heard a scratching noise and I crept out from under my covers. As my eyes adjusted to the little bit of light, I saw what looked like claws. Suddenly, another hand appeared. The hands crept closer, making a slight swooshing sound as they glided across my sheets to me.

"Mayir!" I said in a loud whisper. He turned to me, but didn't wake up. The bogeyman's head had emerged from under my bed. His eyes glowed brighter as he inched his way to me.

"Mayir!" I shrieked. He shot up and Mom and Dad pushed open the door as the monster dragged me under.
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Comments: 4

DarkStar016 [2016-08-21 05:31:45 +0000 UTC]

The monster sounds like a yeti xD This piece was pretty short, which was nice, but it could have benefited from a bit more. The plot is pretty straight forward, easy to read and understand which is good; it's not confusing and you have clear characters. The ending is a bit predictable though, with the monster coming out to get her. I really like that the brother and sister saw the same creature and stopped to look at each other for a moment, but I would have liked to see them more scared than whatever about it. Kind of hyped it down for me. I would say, change the ending up a bit, like having the monster move to the parent's room and have the mom wake up to find it watching her or something haha But good job on this. I think every kid had a "monster under the bed." For me, it was the bathroom at night. I thought something would get me haha

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Haunting-Rose In reply to DarkStar016 [2016-09-03 02:55:54 +0000 UTC]

XD yeah, i know i have to work on this one some more, i was trying to think more on that prequel story to try and kick start more strange thingsΒ 

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Sampaaai [2012-12-13 11:03:51 +0000 UTC]

really good! I like it ^^

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Haunting-Rose In reply to Sampaaai [2012-12-14 03:20:33 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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