HOME | DD

jzine — A Thief's Mistake (Part 3 of 3) [NSFW]
#bondage #boundandgagged #gagged #prisoner #devilsgullet #gaggedtiedup #bondagelit
Published: 2018-01-07 23:42:16 +0000 UTC; Views: 4254; Favourites: 17; Downloads: 0
Redirect to original
Description “Ghd dhmmnt thnf hmf hhrd,” Rowan whimpered into the ballgag. Orla’s hair pin was still stuck up her sleeve and Rowan desperately tried to shake it loose. Her ropes had been replaced with shackles after she was taken to her cell. Her arms and ankles were cuffed together with a chain connecting her wrists to her ankles behind her back. The chain was so taut she could touch her feet. More chains wrapped above and below her breasts and were connected to a chain hanging from the ceiling, suspending her in the air.

Rowan was sweating. Her position and her struggles to remove the hair pin were taking a toll on her. Rowan would not remain here any longer in this place. She would not fail in her mission. She would break free of this bondage and of this prison. The hair pin fell into her hand.

Rowan let out a heavy sigh of relief. Her body relaxed and she slumped in her bonds. She tried to pick the lock on her cuffs but could not reach them no matter how hard she tried. Rowan was not deterred and instead tried to reach her ankle cuffs. She was extremely careful not to drop the hair pin and began to poke around the lock. She couldn't tell how much time had passed without any progress. It felt like hours.

The only sound was the rattling of chains and the occasional muffled grunt from Rowan herself. The loud bang of the lock being opened startled Rowan and she nearly dropped the hain pin. Someone was coming in, she had to do this now.

Orla walked in, her eyes as wide as her smile. She walked slowly letting the sound of her boots hitting the floor echo in the cell. Orla paced around the room observing Rowan every once in awhile reaching out a hand to run her fingernails across Rowan’s body. Rowan shuddered and struggled in her chains. Orla let out a quiet laugh as Rowan continued to work on the lock.

“I’m sure you guessed I don’t have approval to be down here,” Orla examined her fingernails splaying out her hands in front of her, “and I’m sure you have also guessed why I am here anyway.”

“Fhgg mmmff!” Rowan glared at Orla.

“You didn’t have to attack me you know. It would have made this much easier for you.” Orla walked up to Rowan, now looking at her face to face. Rowan swung her head around with a renewed struggle. Orla grabbed her by the chin forcing Rowan to look her in the eye. “Don’t know why you refuse to learn.” A small click might have been the sound of a gunshot. Both pairs of eyes went wide.

Rowan’s ankle cuffs fell to the floor with a heavy thud and her feet fell away from her hands. Using the momentum of her swing Rowan brought her legs forward and quickly wrapped them around Orla’s neck. She squeezed Orla’s neck between her thighs trying to cut off her breathing. Orla smacked and clawed at Rowan’s legs but Rowan did not falter. It didn’t take long for Orla to become unconscious and fall unceremoniously to the floor.

Rowan reveled in her victory for a short moment before continuing her escape. She still couldn’t reach her hands but was relatively certain she could rattle loose the chain suspending her in the air. She used her legs to swing her back and forth, each time gaining more and more speed. Soon she was swinging as far as the chain would allow and Rowan was certain it hadn’t dealt with this amount of stress for very long. She was right, with a loud and sickening creek a loop of the chain broke and Rowan plummeted to the floor.

She hit hard on top of Orla took a moment to recover from the pain. Rowan crawled over Orla’s body and searched her pockets until she found a set of keys. She tried every key one by one on her cuffs, dropping them from time to time in her hurry. She didn’t want Orla to awaken now as she wasn’t sure if she could take her down again. Finally a key worked.Rowan sprung to her feet and immediately removed the ballgag pocketing it as she did.

Rowan smiled slightly and picked up her cuffs. She removed Orla’s armor until Orla was clad only in a simple shirt and shorts. She locked the cuffs on Orla’s wrists and ankles and took another chain to put Orla in a stringent hogtie. Rowan tore a piece of cloth from the bottom of Orla’s shirt and tightly gagged her with it.

Orla’s armor was a bit tight, but she was able to wear it over her clothes. Rowan heard a small muffled grunt and knew Orla had woken up. She bent over and looked her in the eye.

“Hm wnll gnll nhh!” Orla rolled over and attempted to kick her way out of her bondage. Her struggles were accompanied by a plethora of screams and curses. Rowan tapped her lightly on the cheek.

“Enjoy yourself love,” she said with a wink and with that Rowan left the cell and locked the door and could no longer hear Orla’s muffled anger.

If Rowan was in solitary, then magical confinement was only one floor below her. Keeping her head down and her walk brisk, she made her way to the nearest staircase. She didn’t run into a guard as she made her way down the stairs and out onto the floor. It looked remarkably similar to her hallway, stone walls with great wooden doors indicating the cells. Where would she be?

Rowan wouldn’t start at the end again and decided to open the very first cell in the hallway. Paydirt. In front of her a young woman with shocking red hair was bound with her hands up in the air, attached to the ceiling. Her legs were spread open with a bar in between them attached to cuffs. She wore a leather blindfold and also sported a big white ball gag. She still wore the clothes Rowan had last seen her in, a long white ruffled dress and a dark green vest cascading down to her knees. A tight corset around her waist along with three leather belts to carry her various bags and trinkets. She still wore her fingerless gloves and high laced brown boots that went up to her knees.

Rowan hoped Orla’s keychain held the key she needed. Her luck was obviously turning as her shackles opened with only the third key. Rowan removed the blindfold to see her golden brown eyes widen in surprise. She removed the gag and continued to remove the rest of her bindings.

“Hello Eliora, sorry it took me so long to get here,” Rowan said. Eliora smiled as Rowan wiped a tear away from her eye.

“Just happy you’re here at all,” Eliora hugged Rowan as she was set free, “how is our situation?”

“Well, we are stuck in a legendary prison three levels below ground and an untold amount of guards between us and the exit.” Rowan sighed, her body began to feel the weight of the day. Eliora’s hand glowed and rested on Rowan’s forehead. The light faded and Rowan felt like she had just slept a full night.

“Thanks Elli, hope you have more of that in you because I’m all out of ideas,” Rowan said.

“I doubt I can blow a hole in the wall or any fancy magiks like that, but smaller things I should be able to handle.”

“Can you disguise us as someone else?”

“I’d have to see them in order to do it.”

“Okay, then I have a plan, let’s go.”

Rowan helped Eliora to her feet and they hugged quickly one more time. Rowan collected the shackles used to bind Eliora and opened the door. On their way to Orla’s cell they found no resistance. Rowan opened the cell and once again heard Orla’s furious muffled screams.

“Is it okay if she’s bound and gagged?” Rowan asked. Eliora chuckled lightly and waved her hand in a grand sweeping gesture and transformed into Orla. Orla finally quieted down as her doppelganger appeared in front of her.

“That’s pretty good, here put on my armor and give me the shackles.”

Eliora was soon a pitch perfect copy of Orla and Rowan was her shackled prisoner. The shackles weren’t locked and she could remove them whenever she wanted.

“Here, put the ball gag in my mouth,” Rowan said.

“Is that really necessary?”

“Orla would never let me go without one I assure you.” Rowan let out a sigh before she was gagged again.

Eliora moved at a decent clip moving Rowan along with a hand on her arm. As they ascended the stairwell she switched positions and had Rowan in front of her and a hand on her neck. When Rowan first saw a guard Eliora pushed her forward and almost made her fall over.

“Get moving!” Eliora said. The guards gave them a curious glance, but said nothing. They headed up the stairway, skipped over the barracks floor and went straight to administration at the top. The guards at the top of the stairs seemed surprised at their appearance.

“Where are you taking her?” one of them asked, seeming curious more than anything.

“Nalen wants to see our new prisoner, not sure why,” Eliora responded. The other guard laughed.

“Probably nothing too good for you eh thief?” she said.

“Just what she deserves,” Eliora said and started to walk again. Nalen’s office was obvious, the big ornate door at the end of the hallway with a metal plate over the door that said ‘WARDEN’. Eliora shoved Rowan through the door and quickly locked it behind her. Nalen stepped up from her desk in a huff.

“What is the meaning of this Orla?” Nalen asked, her face contorting in anger. Rowan uncuffed herself and held them up in one hand. Nalen’s mouth hung open. Rowan gave her a small shrug and Eliora held out her hand towards Nalen. Shiny blue ropes wrapped around Nalen’s body tying her hands behind her back and wrapping more ropes below her breasts. Her legs were tied at her ankles, above and below her knees and at her thighs. She opened her mouth to scream but a shiny blue strip of magic covered her mouth cutting off her cries. She fell to the ground.

“Hhw dhrm nhh wrmtgh!” Nalen screamed. Nalen struggled furiously, buckling back and forth. Rowan removed her own gag and walked over to the newfound prisoner.

“Sorry about this love, I’m sure you understand,” Rowan held up the ball gag, “I made a promise after all.” Eliora let the magic sealing Nalen’s lips dissipate and before she could cry out Rowan stuffed her mouth with the ball gag.

“Okay let’s get out of here.” Eliora flourished her hand and Rowan was transformed magically into Nalen. It did not stop Nalen’s furious screams.

“Hm'll gmt nhh fhr thnf!”

“Yes I’m sure I’ll live to regret this or some other threatening nonsense. If it’s all the same to you I hope we don’t meet again.” Rowan and Eliora exited the room as Nalen struggled on the ground.

“Ma’am what happened to the prisoner?” one of the guards at the end of the hallway asked.

“Trust me she is secure. We are going to get something for her, we will back shortly,” Rowan said doing her best impression of the haughty warden. They gave her a quick nod and they were on their way.

The guards gave them no notice save for the occasional salute. Rowan expected Nalen commanded enormous respect. It was an odd feeling to have people look at her the way they did at Nalen. She glanced at Eliora. She wore her Orla costume to great effect, even Rowan had no trouble believing it was really her.

Finally they were outside and Rowan’s plans stopped there. She was amazed any of this actually worked at all. Eliora apparently had some idea what to do. She walked over to the nearest guard and said something Rowan could not hear. Soon he approached with two horses already saddled. Rowan tried not to look surprised. They mounted up and were soon riding away from the prison without a man in pursuit. Eliora let their disguises drop as soon as they were far enough away. Her shoulders visibly sagged, tired from the amount of magic she had used during their escape.

“I can’t believe that worked! What did you tell him?” Rowan asked.

“I just said you needed to go out on a secret mission,” Eliora said.

“I don’t believe you, there is no way that just worked,” Eliora just laughed in response, “Well Orla and Nalen are going to be pretty upset at us.”

“Think they will come after us?”

“Maybe, but don’t worry Elli, we’ll be one step ahead.”
Comments: 5

ugiel [2018-03-11 15:02:29 +0000 UTC]

Consider that a review of the whole series.

The story is crunchy - so much it can really drain a joy from reading it. The simplicity of your writing style make the entire thing clumsy, for example, I can recall a two-sentence paragraph in which just "Rowan" was written three times. Three times in two sentences! You need more synonyms, more difersity in naming and use of words overall. What also turned out pretty bad were desciption parts. In first chapter, when Rowan views herself in the mirror, You made a mistake that repulse me from any further reading of poor stories - what differs You from writers usually doing this is that  You brought that description in the middle of the chapter and not at the very beginning. Nonetheless, trust me - no one likes to read sentences like "This is X and she has Y hair and Z clothes". This is supposed to be a story for an adult reader and paragraphs like that could be written for a child.

On plus, You definitely had the idea for the entire plot driven from the beginning till the end. I must admit that will to find out Rowan's reasons to end up in Devil's Gullet kept me attracted until the end. The story definitely had some potential, but I see it as wasted. I think You can write better than it. That wasn't as cringy and bad as many other debuts I've encountered on DA - I wish You improvements

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

jzine In reply to ugiel [2018-03-11 17:45:57 +0000 UTC]

Thank you for the critique. I appreciate you taking the time review my story. I will work on it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ugiel In reply to jzine [2018-03-11 18:07:18 +0000 UTC]

Good luck

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Skelebomb [2018-01-09 02:31:56 +0000 UTC]

Those pesky thieves

A nice little story, thank you very much for the entry

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

jzine In reply to Skelebomb [2018-01-09 03:34:15 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! It was fun to write

👍: 0 ⏩: 0