Comments: 7
PhoenyxStiles [2016-10-08 17:20:07 +0000 UTC]
I had a rather large nosebleed reading this 😂
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ChibiEdo [2010-09-04 08:46:13 +0000 UTC]
awwwwwwwwwwww thank you!!! It took me a while to get it (at least I THINK I got it now.. and if it IS as I understand it now I love it.xD .
you are really good at writing mature content stuff*_* I can't wait for your chaptered fic now.. *dies out of impatience*
I can totally imagine tyler and leslie evesdropping.. (I can actually also imagine tyler recording everything on cam in case something would have happened..XD I can also imagine leslie having mental images XDDDDDDDD
I am still a bit sad that they didn't really do it but the mental image totally makes up for it.. oh and on the other hand I'm actually glad that you didn't make them do it in the lab. Concerning my victor the lab is totally off limits for stuff like that.. kissing is ok but nothing more than that. I have the impression though that for your victor that wouldn't be the case.. mainly cause of the part with the porn you put in here xDD My victor isn't really interested in porn because he has no time for useless stuff like that.. he might do a handjob to himself though (thinking of derek that is.. before he fell in love with him he just didn't do anything.. only a few times when he was a teenager to see what it was like, liked the feeling but didn't really need it). but never at work. Actually Derek would be more likely to look at porn than victor..XD
On formatting text:
Generally put in an additional linebreak after a 'part' (don't know real english word, hope you get what I mean^_^; ). Makes it easier to read.
It would be good if leslie's mental image would be in italic. italic is like this without spaces : < i >italic text < /i > Example: italic text
I didn't get at first that it was only a mental image and not real .. so I was really confusedXD I didn't connect the leslie's mental image line to the rest of the text so I thought it was real.. and was really confused why Victor would be so mean to derek concerning that.<< especially because I had thought right at the beginning that it's not what it seems like they are talking about.
< b >bold text< /b > bold text
[link] <--more info here
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KonariWilliams In reply to ChibiEdo [2010-09-04 14:07:59 +0000 UTC]
I don't even think I really get it! XD (Think of a pale pink oval about the size of your thumb or something.....that's what I was thinking of....> .> ) Them eavesdropping is so in character for them, it's not even funny! They're just so silly sometimes. As long as it was believable. (which it probably wasn't)
I'm so sorry about that ; w; But there will be lotsa action in the chaptered fic. Maybe some spin the bottle or seven minutes in heaven. Yeah, my Victor was pretty OOC with the looking up el porno crap! XD I had to write something though. And yeah, my Victor is just.....yeahhefails.... Oh, for your fic, I was gonna make Angie sorta like Derek's ex who doesn't like Victor, maybe toss in some drama and a dash of DerekxTyler or VictorxTyler, depends on my mood when I start writing.......but there will be some friendship fluff between Victor and Tyler in the very beginning. . A.
.....Sorry, it wa confusing, it feels so freakin' rushed and crap like. I wrote it in like five minutes and my humor fails! DX Yeah, they were so OOC it wasn't laughable. I'm almost determined to take down this fail fic......TT 3TT
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