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Leohan — Desire, Chapter 3: Tears
Published: 2009-02-27 17:45:56 +0000 UTC; Views: 502; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 1
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Description There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power.

Washington Irving


Isabelle started to feel more and more tired as she was descending down the infinite ladder, which was taking her only god knew where. That in addition to the increasing heat and humidity in the place and the wounds she had received before was making her, bit by bit, lose her will to go on, just let go, take the easy way out of her curse…

“No, no, no, I can’t think about that now, I must keep going down”

It was no longer after the moment in which those thoughts crossed Belle’s mind when she reached the last step, and, when she stood on nothing but thin air, she almost succumbed over her own weight. But she could keep her balance and, carefully, land half a meter below with the tip of her left foot, and then the other one.

Exhausted, Belle dropped herself over the ladder she had just come down from. She couldn’t see anything in that place, it was hot and she almost couldn’t keep moving on because of the tiredness and pain… It was weird; in times like this, often Shawn would come to comfort her, to tell her to move on or to be strong… That was right. She needed to move on, she was already on her way and she couldn’t give up just yet.

- I was waiting for you to come here, Belle.

The voice that was speaking to her was soft and melodic; tranquilizing, but in a way unlike Shawn’s voice, it was more like the combination of the voice of an angel with the voice of a regular person. Isabelle knew that voice.

- Len? What are you doing here? – She said, turning around to confront the elf, which not an hour ago she had left in the marble room. She couldn’t deny it felt good to see him once again, to know there was a friendly person waiting for her, but… Why?

- I was waiting for you, Belle. Please, may you follow me?

In the midst of all the darkness, Len was the only thing in the entire room that Belle could see, like if he absorbed all of the light inside of that place, making him shine brightly.

Len turned, giving his back to Isabelle, and started to run at a great speed towards the infinite darkness.

- Len! No!

Belle, exhausted, grabbed herself from what she had left of strength and decided to chase Len, which for some reason kept getting farther and farther from her. Wobbling, she started to run, extending her arms like if that got her closer to that person that perhaps she could call a friend. However, a rock in her way made her trip and fall. It hurt a lot, she had fallen with her left elbow, but she wouldn’t cry or complain about that…

- Are you alright? – Len was now again in front of her, extending his hand in a friendly gesture. Being courteous, just like before.

- Yes but… I can’t understand it, Len. What are you doing here?  You had stayed in the other room, and were going to leave, and I was going to move along…

Len’s smile shut down, giving place to an expression a lot more serious, almost lugubrious. His eyes became darker and his pose much less casual.

-Oh, dear, I am afraid that is the thing I wanted to talk to you about, Belle.- The man said, dimly, not with that angelic voice from before anymore – You see, I never really left the room, in fact, this is very hard to say but…

-What is the matter Len? What happened to you?

-I died, Belle… You have poisoned me. – Isabelle started to drop tears, biting her inferior lip strongly in order to avoid screaming – Then you cut off my hand and you signed the piece of paper using one of mi fingers as a pen, and my blood as ink…

Isabelle couldn't contain herself in that moment, and she screamed with all the strength of her lungs. Could she have fooled herself to think in such a way? Could an illusion be so cruel to confuse her, and produce her to do such a horrible thing to Len, that had been so nice to her? Belle just wanted to yell until reality ended like if it was another horrible faux, and the echo of her voice seemed to make the cave tremble until her lungs gave up, leaving her crying on the floor of the cavern.

-Are you sure you are alright?

It wasn’t the sweet voice of Len the one that was speaking to her now. It was a colder, bitterer voice that lacked emotions. Belle raised her head to see, in the place of Len Clestow, a strange man of a very pale skin, chestnut eyes and dark, bristly hair, dressed with doctor clothes. He held in his left hand a crimson red bag, and in the right one, a metallic receipt of vulgar appearance.

Darkness wasn’t complete anymore, in place of that a soft light brightened from somewhere, she couldn’t tell where. Behind that man, yet another reproduction of the statue of the angel she had seen before, only that this time it had golden wings and had nothing in its hand, which differentiated it from the formers. The walls in the corridor Isabelle had run through were decorated with people’s handprints.

- Who are you? – Asked Belle, her voice broken and with tears still in her eyes.

- I am Avery Grey – The tall man said as an answer. He was cold and didn’t say much, like if he was trying to be as brief as possible. – Do you need any help?

Isabelle avoided instinctively the eyes of Avery, which seemed intense to her, overwhelming, and tried to get up not without difficulty. It had all been an illusion, another bad joke of the ones her mind enjoyed to play her.

- I’m fine. – She said, dysphonic because of the crying – My name is Belle.

- I must treat your wounds. – The doctor said. Isabelle noticed that, besides the cuts she had received, in her face and forearm before, when she fell down just now she had stuck herself a little stone in her elbow, that was starting to bleed.

- Ok – She said softly.

Isabelle had a hard time trusting that man of such a strange aspect, but her wounds were hurting a lot and she needed to heal.

Both of them sat in the floor of that stone passageway. Avery Grey opened the red bag and took some elements from there: cotton, disinfectant, bandages and a clamp. Belle couldn’t help but to notice that, inside of that completely full bag, there was a pair of big knives.

- You are going to confront me, aren’t you? – Belle said. – You are going to need my blood or something like.

Avery responded while he was holding Belle’s left arm and using the clamp to extract the little stone.

- The rules for this room are different. If I wanted to do so, I could have won without you seeing me.

The moment in which the doctor took off the stone hurt a bit, but Belle kept her sight still on those shiny knives inside of the bag.

- Tell me, Avery. Why are you helping me?

- I am a doctor, I heal people. -  That was the answer, perhaps too simplistic, maybe childish, that Isabelle received.

- I cannot be healed. – Said Belle, softly – There is no case in me.

Avery Grey was applying disinfectant to the wound in Isabelle’s arm, so she was feeling an intense pain.

- If that is the case – He said – There will be a problem. Because I am still to accomplish the condition to keep moving, and something tells me I have to do it in order for you to get out of here.

The girl did not get it. First Len and now Avery. What was it that made complete strangers be nice with her?

- You should know that I have killed a lot of people. Are you still willing to help me, that in mind?

In the time she said that, the doctor had already finished applying the bandages, and had put gauzes on her elbow and forehead.

- I am a doctor, I will let a judge prosecute you. - After saying this, Avery changed the topic inmediatly. - Your forehead wound was small, but it was draining blood from your head. That must have hurt; I will give you a pill for pain.

Avery offered her a pink, circular pill and she swallowed it. It was true, her head was hurting, and she didn’t have much of a choice but to obey.

- He gave you poison, Belle. Don’t trust that man. Attack him while you are still conscious.

That voice, that Belle now knew belonged to Shawn, maybe was right but…

- Are you sure, Shawn? I mean, he has been.

Belle saw the doctor again, that was staring at her firmly. She saw him extending a hand while claws were replacing his nails. He saw the eyes go red and the serious expression turn into an evil grin. All of that in slow motion. Behind the doctor, a swarm of bats was getting together and coming straight for her. Isabelle dodged the incoming hand of the doctor with ease, then took the switchblade from her pocket in one swift movement and threw a cut to the doctor’s throat.

Useless, the clawed hand of Avery grabbed Isabelle’s arm, and he threw her to the ground with an amazing strength for a man of normal built. Belle fell with a strong impact on her shoulder, seeing how the bats were getting closer and closer. She was scared but too tired to move or defend herself. Then all was darkness.

Two red eyes, more of the kind you would see in a children’s cartoon than in reality, were watching her from the mist of darkness. Then, all of that obscurity transformed into something with a shape. Was it animal? A demon, perhaps? No. It didn’t have a shape at all. It changed all the time between a jaguar, a bat, thousands of ants and many other forms. It was scary, but it didn’t attack Belle, it just stared at her with those red eyes…

Then she was back in the street, next to her apartment. A thin layer of snow had fallen recently, and it was freezing out there. She stood up. Could the entire trip she made have been no more than another fake? The sun was shining, partially covered by tender clouds, could she have fallen asleep all that time?

Isabelle opened the door to her apartment. It wasn’t locked so she didn’t need to use the key at all but...

It didn’t look like if it was her apartment. Well, it sure was, the painting was the same and all the rooms were there but it was just like if it were for sale. The furniture, the pictures, the brushworks, nothing was there, and what about Shawn?

- Shawn! Are you here?

No answer, it shivered Isabelle’s nerves. She could just hear a creaking noise coming from the kitchen.

- Shawn? – Belle went through the empty room all the way to the kitchen and opened the door were the weird sounds came from. Every step could be heard as loud as an avalanche in her head.

- Oh, my God, is that you, Shawn?

Two tears dropped from Belle’s eyes. Yes, it was Shawn lying in the floor of the kitchen. But at the same time, it couldn’t be Shawn, no. That man lying at the floor with all of that… nothingness, it could not be the Shawn she knew. It was staring at her with pitch black eyes that were eating a good part of his face and also his ears. His hands weren’t just there, consumed by the same darkness that had gotten into his eyes. He was moving his handless arms to nowhere in particular while trying, again and again, to stand, a task that his lack of hands complicated for him.

- I am coming, Shawn… I will help.

Isabelle was scared to do so, but she took a step forward, and then another towards the faceless Shawn that just moved in the floor and tried, without any sense, to do something. The cracking sound continued, Isabelle didn’t know what it was but it got stronger as she was closer to Shawn.

- I will help you, Shawn. – She said with little conviction, as she approached his friend with her hand. She was very scared to keep getting close, to keep hearing the sound, but she owed him that much…

- He can’t hear you. – Infinite voices spoke to her that time as she saw the same figure of before, the dark shadow with bright red eyes, now in the form of a wolf. The dark figure was surrounding Shawn with its obscurity. – Can’t you see that he hasn’t got any eyes or ears?

It was mocking her. The thing was making fun of her fear. She was going to save Shawn. She was one step closer now. Suddenly, the kitchen of the little apartment felt much bigger. An asphyxiating sensation attacked Belle while she was taking her little switchblade from the pocket, like if she was in the deepest cave with little to no oxygen.

- I will help you, Shawn.

- Don’t try it, Isabelle Garenza. If you get any closer, I will eat him.

Isabelle paralyzed in the spot. What could she do now? Could she go forward? Could she just stay in the place, watching that thing cover Shawn in shadows? The creaking sound was getting louder and the air was draining out. Belle fell on her knees. She just… couldn’t do anything. She couldn’t help Shawn or herself for that matter.

- I can. – The voice came from behind her, but she couldn’t turn her head around. Was that…

- Avery?

- I have the power to fight it. Will you let me do it?

No, she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t let the doctor get involved in all of that. It was too dangerous for him, too dangerous for anybody…

- No, you can’t, it is just… too powerful.

- Then give me the power, Belle, trust the fact that I will surpass it and so I can save Shawn.

It was all very strange for the lady to understand, but she was weak, alone and desperate, so she was willing to give it a chance.

- Fine, I will trust you.

The noises stopped, the air went back to normal and the shadowy figure was no longer surrounding his friend. Instead of that it had the shape of a tiger. Besides Belle Avery grey appeared, wielding in his hands the pair of big knives.

The dark beast, now silent and ignoring Shawn, that was getting his eyes back, jumped towards the doctor with a big leap, but with a swift movement of his left arm, Avery managed to cut the shadow in half with one of the knives, making it vanish. Everything was back to normal.

Isabelle opened her eyes. She was lying in the cave. She had been sleeping. Looking up, she saw the statue of the angel, that was holding, now, the plate that Avery had before. But she was rather looking for the doctor that had saved her in her dream.

- Avery! – She yelled, while moving her head around, looking for the doctor that saved her in her dreams.

Avery Grey appeared from beyond the statue, with his red bag in the hand, but he didn’t say anything, he just looked back at Isabelle.

- I know you have to leave, but please, I need to know first, Avery… - She said. – Were you actually there, helping me? Could you also see what I saw?

- No – The doctor nodded. – The kind of things you see belong only to you. While I am able to do a lot of things, I can’t enter one’s mind. But I did help you, and in a way, I also shared a part of the illusion with you.

He made a stop, and then opened his bag to take a little jar full of pills and throw it to Isabelle. It fell in front of her.

- Those are actual painkillers, but you may not believe me considering the pill I gave you before I actually used it to get into your mind. It stimulated your subconscious to a very powerful level, allowing you to be awake, but in a state of illusion that emulated a lucid dream. Therefore allowing me to hear what you were seeing and interact with the part of you that was unsleeping. Your subconscious has a great power indeed.

- So then… Is it over? Am I cured? – She asked, still trying to understand what was going on. She understood that the doctor had drugged her and put her into hypnosis of some kind, but what did that make?

- I am afraid it is not so simple. Practically speaking, I did nothing at all while you were in the middle of your deception but to tell you a way to get rid of it. You were right, I cannot cure you, at least not here. I can only give a temporal solution that will not make it for you. Eventually I will find you and try to give you a more permanent solution. Now I must leave.

The doctor looked back and started to walk. He was heading for a ladder behind of the statue that Belle hadn’t seen before.

- And what should I do now?

The doctor looked back, smiling this time. Isabelle could tell it was an honest smile.

- First you should take one of the pills to alleviate the pain, then go up the ladder you came from, it will surely lead you home. Find somebody you really trust and stay with him, make him your protector. Trust with all your strength that he won’t let anything happen to you, and most likely the illusions will diminish. Your mind wants you to be afraid, if you can’t beat it with your reason you can still beat it with your will.

- Let’s go home, Belle. Shall we? – The voice of Shawn said in his typical, tranquil voice.

- Yes… But one last question. What was the condition to win this time?

- I just had to cry. – Said the doctor while he put his bag in the shoulder and started to climb the ladder, making a metallic sound in every step as he went right up towards the unknown.

“How ironic” Isabelle couldn’t help but to think that while she cleaned a tear, now of happiness, from her right eye.
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Comments: 7

Eranova [2009-02-28 06:43:17 +0000 UTC]

I loved the story that you told here. Greatly emotional and dramatic on Belle's part, and you really had her character accurately portrayed. Also very clever on Dr. Grey's part with the drug, both incapacitating her so she won't get in his way, yet at the same time kept in a (mostly) harmless state of illusion for him to observe.

Well, I'm not really sure what else to say. I'm just gonna repeat again that I loved the story told here, and how in the end, even if Belle lost, it really wasn't that bad of a loss with what she's gained from the good doctor. Good luck to you, sir, and should you and Dr. Avery Grey pull the win in this one, know that Belle and I shall willingly bow out with pride.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Leohan In reply to Eranova [2009-02-28 10:15:59 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! glad you liked it. As I told you a lot of time before I would, I enjoyed writing your char a lot, and if I win canonically, I would be really glad to have a SE with Avery carrying out his word in a not so distant future, if you don't mind me doing that.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Eranova In reply to Leohan [2009-03-01 02:30:36 +0000 UTC]

Wouldn't mind at all, good sir, and I'd be looking forward to seeing it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Tamasha [2009-02-27 17:58:23 +0000 UTC]

Wow, just wow. O: You've changed so much stuff since the last draft I saw! Or maybe it's not so much that you've changed stuff, but more that you just fitted the disjointed sections together now, y'know? Either way, it's awesome.

I've already told you most of what I find cool about this, not least of it being the way you depicted schizophrenia so accurately. I can think of one new thing to comment on, which is the way you depict direct speech - it's unique, and adds a different kind of flavour to your entry.

Speaking of which, the last line has " " instead of the - you've been using for the rest of the entry.

Also, FFFF. You give me too much credit.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Leohan In reply to Tamasha [2009-02-27 18:30:31 +0000 UTC]

Thanks a bunch! I'm glad you think it ended up well, I was afraid I would do it to cliche...
Thanks a bunch again for your corrections, were it not for you I would maybe be trying something really impossible.
And yeah, you deserve the credit, just sorry that MLK is just too much cool for you to handle...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Tamasha In reply to Leohan [2009-02-27 18:49:20 +0000 UTC]

Nah, happy to help. I have all that spare time, might as well put it to use. OTL

My suggestion for the thoughts vs direct speech controversy would be to leave everything else as it is, and use italics for thoughts. How does that sound?

And pssht, well, darn. :< I'll get there eventually, just you wait!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Leohan In reply to Tamasha [2009-02-28 11:00:23 +0000 UTC]

Done it with the italics

Yeah, I'm looking forward see the moment when you catch up with the King.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0