Comments: 9
Demoness-Melody [2012-08-31 19:09:15 +0000 UTC]
I enjoy your new ending much more. Kleio's actions against Edward are interesting and they seem to flow with her character. But honestly I think I liked her exit in your original. Probably because I enjoyed your final dialogue there. This direction is also good though. It flows right and seems to fit the characters.
Good luck~
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Leohan In reply to Demoness-Melody [2012-08-31 21:11:40 +0000 UTC]
Thanks! And yeah, it was a necessity, though. I misinterpreted the mechanics of the tournament and it didn't make that much sense before.
I also like it better like this, though! There needs to be a reminder that Edward is a ruthless killer, after all...
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Leohan In reply to nnaj [2012-08-27 22:48:15 +0000 UTC]
Thanks! ^^ Glad you enjoyed it!
Edward is plain practical. Too practical, really. Any problem he has, he must solve, no matter who falls along the way. Few times the needless extremes are needed. He would be considered a villain for quantity of evil, not for quality.
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YuYuchan [2012-08-24 16:00:23 +0000 UTC]
What a rollercoaster ride of a round! Edward is a fun character, and I really enjoy his internal dialogue. I love the contrast of the rugged Edward and the ethereal Kleio, what a great match.
Edward's way of reaping really shocked me. It felt like Caerphil had reached this peace with his end, and then Edward strangled him-- easily the most violent and slow way to kill someone.
I'm curious to see how Edward progresses as a reaper. Good work on this first round!
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Leohan In reply to YuYuchan [2012-08-24 20:07:11 +0000 UTC]
Thank you! Yeah I really meant to put a lot of contrast into it.
I hope to be able to progress, since I too expect to see where Edward's story could go from here on. Right now I don't have a great overarching story in mind for him, but it might build up as the tournament goes. ^^
Once again thanks for the nice comments
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Leohan In reply to LadyRiverlark [2012-08-23 17:41:37 +0000 UTC]
Thanks a lot lady ^^ And thanks as well for the proofreading. You may have found yourself in the credits back on part 1.
I really hope we can face each other next!
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LadyRiverlark In reply to Leohan [2012-08-23 19:08:45 +0000 UTC]
I did see the credit. It's nice to see how many people are really appreciating and recognizing the beta-readers in this tournament. It leaves happy fuzzy feelings.
I also hope we get to face off. It will be epic and beautiful and if I face you and lose, I trust you to write my character well and give him a proper ending, whatever it ends up being.
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