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Lhyrre — The Assassin's Testimony
Published: 2012-03-19 03:36:46 +0000 UTC; Views: 395; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 5
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Description It all came to a culmination, then. Generations of scheming, of waiting – of subservience and pain had been suffered to come to this moment. One thousand years of staying silent had been pushed for, thousands upon thousands of lives laid down so that one girl, in one room, could murder one man.

Thousands of voices streamed into her mind at that moment, the voices of the living and the dead. The strength of millions of sacrificed lives flowed into her as she bowed – obedient to the last –  to the man who shortly would not be among the living anymore.

He gently drew her down onto the bed as her mind, buoyed up by the others, was buzzing. Her body shook with the energy of it – with the fear and the dread. She'd laced her own lips with the poison to kill, but hopefully she could kill him before it set in. No room for mistakes; after all, she had been put onto the planet for one reason.

Her reason to live was so no one would ever have only one reason to live again.

*

I don't have much time now.

Perhaps I'm writing this because I don't want to be immortalized or condemned. Maybe it will immortalize or condemn me. I've never been able to leave anything behind before – nothing that could jeopardize the cause. It doesn't matter now.

I was never given a name. Well, maybe it's more like I've been given many names, depending on who has owned me. Out of all of them, though, I liked Emma the best. I'd like to be remembered as Emma.

I remember the exact moment I came into existence. I suppose that most of us do, we Flower-children. There are other names for what we are, but I prefer to use that one. From the moment they brought me to conception, the others were talking to me. I think it's like that for all of us, again, but we never would have had a chance otherwise.

From my coming into awareness, though, I was different. Chosen. No matter how much the researchers at the Genetic Manipulation Facility messed with my genes, made me immune to this, tried to reduce my aggressiveness… or take away my ability to resist, they could not change who I was. I've seen my files. Apparently, I would have been a redhead. As I grew, I always had the voices of Everyone with me. Until the moment when I suppose I would have been "born", I was carried and supported through the experimentation – the changes. It seems strange. You would think that mere gene restructuring wouldn't hurt, but as I got bigger, it hurt more and more. I felt many others like me die. That's no secret.

It doesn't take any effort for Flower Children to hear each other's thoughts. I bet you never saw that coming, did you? But I'm different. All of us are different in different ways, but I'm more different. The aspect that the researchers couldn't ever see is that I don't just hear the thoughts of my brothers and sisters… I hear the thoughts of everyone else too.

From my earliest memories, though, I was being taught how to resist without being resistant. I learned not to react to the pain of the gene changes. I learned that, for the survival of as many of my brothers and sisters as possible, I must act as if I was a robot. Every day I lived in the heads of my fellows, listening to them stuff down defiance, watching them bow to men and woman who didn't even deserve to be looked upon by them.

After all, we're better. Didn't you create us that way? We're stronger, smarter, prettier, and have more self-control. We submit because we're patient, not because we don't have souls.

As soon as I was able to do any kind of work, I was sold. I was happy to get away, but prepared for the worst. After all, it was no secret what could happen in those houses. Prostitution, abuse, sometimes even death… But we all had to act like it was a secret. As if we didn't know. As if the world was always wonderful. Does it bite at you at all that an eight-year-old has more control over his or her emotions than you do? Sometimes I wish I'd had a childhood. That's why, right now, I'm waiting for the person to find me with the body of your emperor, writing about the rebellion that you nurtured yourselves, like roses in a hothouse.

I can't tell you all the plans that have gone into this one over the years, as they've all become fuzzy, like a legend. But for a thousand years we've been waiting and waiting until a person came who could, completely without suspicion, drive a stake into the heart of an empire.

That person is me. Ever since I was born, I was meant to die here.

Most of you weak-minded idiots would rebel against that, or call it something mystical and pathetic like fate. Many of you would fight it, go in another direction. It's not that I'm forced to die here, but that I understand something that you don't. In order to be myself, I have to be part of everyone else. It's just who I am.

I've had good masters and bad masters, people that loved me and people that hated me. I even fell in love. You didn't think we had that capacity, did you?

And, well, for my ability to sit at the desk of the dead man who I have murdered and think almost nothing of it – you have only yourselves to blame for that. Whether life is precious or life is not isn't important to me. All I know is this: My life is important to me. The lives of the millions who have died by your hands are important to me. And one more death to end the long massacre is nothing to me.

Okay, that's a lie.

I didn't want to kill him. I honestly didn't.

I mentioned falling in love, right? And liking the name Emma?

Charlie was the one that gave that name to me.

What the hell, I've got at least three hours before anyone comes in here.

Emperor Charles was the one who gave my name to me. I'd never met a human before – only animals who would pounce on me at every turn. However, as I got closer to Charlie, I realized what being a human was supposed to be. When he kissed me for the first time, it was the first time I reacted without thinking – the first time I allowed passion to control my body.

I'm blocking them out now. It's lonely here, sitting, without my mind full of voices.

Before today, I never realized that being human was supposed to be imbued with kindness. That a man, no matter what his station, could bend down and help a lowly servant – lower even! A Gen-Slave. In his mind was such unbridled compassion, such unabashed honesty… it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

But as I fell in love with his humanity, I realized something else too. That no matter how much I loved him and his humanity, unless he was dead I would never be allowed to be human. That the thousands of children that endure indignities beyond imagination could never be human unless the man I love died, and, in that moment of weakness, every gen-slave, every flower-child rose up and quietly stood their ground.

Now he's dead and I can be human. And it hurts. Humanity at his expense hurts. This is why I'm leaving this letter. Because, even though my brothers and sisters want me to run away, I'm not going to. Instead, when you find this room, you're going to see me die. It's not a simple thing, dying, but there's no way I can remain alive anymore. I killed him for their freedom. I killed an innocent man for crimes he did not commit, simply because he held the position of power that could set them free.

Here are the questions historians are going to ask. I'll save you a thousand years of debate.

Did I kill him? Yes.

Did I love him? More than anything.

Do I regret it? With every drop of blood in my body.

Would I do it again? A million times.

I would never give up falling in love with him even if I had the chance to live my life again, just like I would kill him again if I had to live my miserable, short life all over again. Because he gave me – the girl who lived to die –  a reason to live and a reason to die. There's no way I would ever give that up.

My name is Emma. I was born in a test tube in a laboratory. From the moment that my soul came into being, I was groomed for this moment. I murdered the most wonderful, human man I have ever met so that I and thousands of others would have the chance to be human. Don't put me in a history book as a dark shadow in a corner. I'm not a demon and I'm not an angel. I'm not a savior and I'm not a destroyer. I'm just myself – every broken inch of me. I hated people and I loved people. I chose to kill and I'm choosing to die. You may think I have no right to die with the one I killed, but now that he's dead, I'm being selfish… or human one time.

It's nearly sunrise now. My last one. Or my first one? That poison had more effect on me than I thought it did.

To my brothers and sisters: Remember this. The reason I'm dying now is for you too. I didn't kill this man so that we could kill everyone who enslaved us. I killed him so that all of us would have a chance to live in freedom. Don't squander that on revenge and murder, or I'll personally come back from the dead and haunt you all for it.

Goodbye.

Sincerely,

Emma

*

The light was creeping over the room now – the girl with the long black braid standing in the window – the light of a new morning. Most of the night-guards were Gen-Slaves as well, which is why she'd been undisturbed the entire night. The sheets of parchment were in her hand, tidily tied into a roll with a ribbon from the curtain. Pounding steps sounded down the corridor and she knew that it would have begun – the true rebellion. Thousands of Flower-Children would fight back, fight against their very genetic instincts to be free. Quietly, she sat down on the bed next to the body, touching the blood-matted brown hair with slender white fingers before roughly drawing out a knife.

The first guard burst into the room as she contemplated the filthy blade, hysterically laughing at the ridiculousness of wanting to clean a dirty knife before she committed suicide.

Her eyes burned with unnamed emotion – an expression that her face seemed unused to, like a muscle that she'd only exercised rarely. For a moment, the blade hung loosely in her hands, still dripping with the clotted blood of the body of the Emperor.

The voices that had been battering away at her protected mind since she'd shut them out a mere hour ago weakened for a moment, and she allowed herself a dangerous moment of relaxation. However, in that moment, a male voice poured through her mind. "P24578!" the voice cried, desperate to get her attention.

She froze, her eyes focusing on nothing. "My name… is Emma," she said quietly, both out loud and in her mind. Then, frighteningly, she smiled, the tension in the air suddenly snapping as she made some decision.

Before anyone could stop her she had driven the knife into her own temple, the fire in her eyes suddenly dying as her eyes rolled up into her head.

The guards stared for a moment, unable to move. The emperor was dead. His killer was dead. The Gen-Slaves of the world seemed to have gone mad.

And there was a scroll in the assassin's hand…
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Comments: 24

R00-ha-ha [2012-04-13 12:19:56 +0000 UTC]

Reminds me of something I'm writing (and something I've written x) ). And just a question but - prompt #1 of prompts from /what/? I wanna try!

Anyways -
This was really cool. The letter form is always nice, and always tricky, I think. Because it's like, what kind of information are you going to put in . . . what is going to matter to the readers, who are also characters in the story . . . ?

So this is relating to that. "As soon as I was able to do any kind of work, I was sold. I was happy to get away, but prepared for the worst."
I'm a little skeptical about the amount of information you had regarding the history of Emma. It is understandable that you would have some discussion on why she thought she was the chosen one, but those sentences in particular seemed like an example of something unnecessary to write. Well, the first one is all right - but the second one, I think, could be replaced with something like "I was sold countless owners", or something. Her personal feelings about her being sold are just . . . unneeded in this sort of letter, you know? It's just getting more on a one-on-one level, I think, and this is supposed to be to countless people.

I'm also wondering what generation of people, or what class society people, or whatever she is speaking to. Right now, in this story, it seems as if these Flower-children are countless in number and indispensable to anybody - yet at the same time, the way in which she describes their lifestyles seems as if nobody would know about who they were or what they did (like they can't afford to own them, or they are from the future when this has all ceased). I think, maybe, you can change that by shifting the perspective - so instead of her trying to explain to us, the audience, she may be accusing, or deliberately pointing out to the Flower-children owners that she knows that they abuse/kill/whatever them and she knows that they know it's wrong, or something. Does that make sense?

"After all, it was no secret what could happen in those houses. Prostitution, abuse, sometimes even death… But we all had to act like it was a secret."

See, like that's what I'm talking about. I see what you did there with saying "But we all had to act like it was a secret". But it's just listing out things, which is obviously you (sorry, don't want to be mean >.<) taking the easy way. I mean, listing is fine - but it's the way in which it's executed. Because you're saying like, "Oh well it's no secret, you all know what happens. *goes on to list what happens*". So I'm saying . . . maybe you can get more personal. Get angry. Get passionate. I dunno, I guess it might be uncharacteristic. But then again, your next few sentences are pretty angry-sounding.

I'm not trying to advertise, but if you read my story From the Seventh Floor, I think you would understand. The thing with the letters to a large audience is, your character either gets too distanced from their situation, or too personal. And it's hard to put it into words after they do something ultimately life-changing, or totally devastating.

Oh, and the other thing about those sentences was - your use of "secret" two times is repetitive. Try taking out the second "secret", I think.

Also: "You would think that mere gene restructuring wouldn't hurt, but as I got bigger, it hurt more and more."
I think 'bigger' is, with her level of vocabulary and understanding, the worser word to use. Maybe 'older'?

"Okay, that's a lie."
^^That sentence is really meh to me because after saying such a huge lie, the "okay" is just too . . . nonchalant. It needs to be more dramatic! Needs more flair! Like, ellipses, or a "No, that's a lie," or something

"What the hell, I've got at least three hours before anyone comes in here."
^^While this is a nice reminder that she is sitting in a room writing a letter, it's really out of place because well, why the hell is she thinking about how much extra time she'll have to write about her love, Charles, when she hasn't even gotten to the point of her letter yet? She's been writing so much blah blah stuff about her - so why the "what the hell"? I think you could replace that with a different toned phrase. This is just an example - and would be in my style - so I dunno, just consider it, I guess.
"I've got at least three hours before anyone comes in here. It'll be plenty of time to finish this and do what needs to be done." Or something. That's not really that great, but meh. You get the point.

"I was born in a test tube in a laboratory."
^^Again with the whole 'who-is-she-writing-this-to' thing. Shouldn't they know? Maybe "I am a Flower-child", or something would be better, or more impacting.

"It's nearly sunrise now. My last one. Or my first one? That poison had more effect on me than I thought it did."
The sunrise shtuffs is nice. But my question is - why did she have poison on her lips again? She had a knife . . . And if it's because it was in case she couldn't go through with the stabbing, which I presume it is, then I believe that you owe us some more explanation, or at least clarity regarding that.


Okay, I'm done criticising I like this, it's very cool. I do like the title too. I saw someone else say it's a bit dull - and I guess that is kind of true, but 'testimony' is a word that speaks volumes. Good job!

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kerosene-angel [2012-04-12 21:51:56 +0000 UTC]

Oh My God!! This was incredible!!! I loved everything about it, but especially the voice of the assassin was just so incredible Loved this!!!

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Lhyrre In reply to kerosene-angel [2012-04-13 02:07:50 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

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kerosene-angel In reply to Lhyrre [2012-04-13 10:36:48 +0000 UTC]

No worries

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AuburnOleander [2012-04-03 14:31:44 +0000 UTC]

This is incredibly creative and imaginative!!! I love it!!! Emma is so real and vibrant. What she did was amazing. However, why did she have to kill him? How does his death free her brothers and sisters? If the Emperor loved Emma so much, then he obviously didn't have a problem with Flower Children, so why didn't he free the Gen-Slaves? Or did he just treat her like a concubine and Emma was the one in love? Their relationship isn't very clear. Also, you stated earlier that she's eight years old. Since she was born from a test tube, does eight make her a child or an adult? Other than those questions, this is a very excellent and imaginative piece!

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Lhyrre In reply to AuburnOleander [2012-04-03 22:36:12 +0000 UTC]

All of these are wonderful, excellent questions. Some of them will be answered in the companion piece i'm working on, and others honestly don't need to be answered. This isn't a book, per say. Also, she's not eight, they are sold to their first masters at eight... I thought I made that pretty clear. Also, I mentioned that killing the Emperor would provide the moment of weakness coupled with the complete undxpectedness of the source of the attack would create the "perfect rebellion."

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AuburnOleander In reply to Lhyrre [2012-04-03 23:40:57 +0000 UTC]

I can't wait to read the companion piece! And you probably made it clear. I should re-read it. And, do not take this wrong, but perhaps you should expand on the reason for his death just a little more. His death should be necessary not just for a perfect rebellion, but for something else, too. It needs a little more something. The story is fantastic, so don't change the main plot or the concept, but the reason behind the assassination should pack a bit more of a powerful punch. I'm not sure if I'm articulating my thoughts correctly, so please don't be offended. Am I making any sense?

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Lhyrre In reply to AuburnOleander [2012-04-04 03:30:51 +0000 UTC]

I think that death is always kind of senseless. She's not completely absolved from what she did. And the piece is her telling the story - not me. This is her last letter. She's not there to justify what she did, only make clear why SHE did it. Not why it was done, not the greater purpose - her purpose.

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AuburnOleander In reply to Lhyrre [2012-04-04 14:11:17 +0000 UTC]

Okay. That makes sense. This was a different writing style for me to read. I haven't read anything laid out like this before. It isn't typical, which is fantastic!! However, I understand now and it makes sense.

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Lhyrre In reply to AuburnOleander [2012-04-04 16:03:54 +0000 UTC]

Typical is boring.

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AuburnOleander In reply to Lhyrre [2012-04-04 20:46:48 +0000 UTC]

That means your work is not boring!

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Lhyrre In reply to AuburnOleander [2012-04-04 20:47:36 +0000 UTC]

Booyah!

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EPur81 [2012-03-20 16:28:11 +0000 UTC]

Very nice. The end seems a little mudled. Who found her? A human or a gen slave? Was there one or many? If there were both in the room how/why are they not killing each other as there is - it appears - an outbreak of Civil War that the assassination perpetrated. Also, you use 'burst into the room' twice in the same scene (end scene).

A way you could go is to have a gen-slave's thought pierce her mind calling her by her number and attempting to stop her (you could develop the relationship between the two as a way of broadening the story).

Much love, cuz!

Eddie

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Lhyrre In reply to EPur81 [2012-03-20 21:50:29 +0000 UTC]

Have I ever mentioned how much I love you? I didn't notice that I repeated myself... I have to watch that, it's a habit I'm trying to break. I already went through and deleted a bunch more repeated phrases, but I must have missed that one. -.- And I'll try to clarify that.

And... THAT'S A GREAT IDEA. You're a genius. I'm so glad I'm related to you.

I will get up to see Marshall. I will. I swear. Love you!

~Katie

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Liedy [2012-03-20 14:55:13 +0000 UTC]

Hi, I just realized the critique form was just for members, but here goes. I hope I'm not too picky, I understand if you disagree with things I said. It's just my opinion anyway. I'll add my suggestions, from top to bottom in order.

*I'm not sure of the title, it's a bit standard and dull, and this isn't a standard nor dull piece, and to be honest if I came across the title randomly on the browsing deviation page, I probably wouldn't have clicked it, but that's me.

*The second stanza? (I don't know what it's called in your language..) opens with A thousand voices.. I would change it, because the first one already introduced the word thousand three times near the end. And it dulls down the word. I'd rather go with, Innumerable, or something.

* obedient to the last, to the man who shortly would not be among the living anymore. This sentence break the flow a little bit, as it doesn't roll naturally in my mouth. (This is being very picky) The same goes for
So that no one would ever have only one reason to live again. It's like word sometimes says: Fragment consider revising.

Exciting introduction by the way, makes me want to read more.

* No matter how much the researchers at the Genetic Manipulation Facility messed with my genes,
made me immune to this.. Immune to what, I don't understand this line

* Sometimes I wish I'd had a childhood Wish I had, or wish i'd have.

* You see, it doesn't take any effort for Flower Children to hear each other's thoughts. I bet you never saw that coming, did you? I recommend you using either of the references to the reader, but not both.

*From my earliest memories, though, I was being taught - I have been taught or They taught me. Also the structure of the sentence makes it unclear whether it is the memories that have taught her, or if she remember them (someone) teaching her.

*This doesn't really matter but: Learned no to react to pain I probably would have written I've been trained not react to pain... It seems more natural.

*Does it bite at you at all that an eight-year-old has more control over his or her emotions than you do? - a bit to direct, almost breaking the flow. However she is angry or something similar so I understand, but I'd rather let her ongoing emotions be more evident throughout the story than suddenly arising in this sentence.

*I can't tell you all the plans that have gone into this one over the years,
as they've all become fuzzy, like a legend - I don't feel like this is something she would say, at least not structered like this. I mean it's after all, a rather pointless sentence, in the great scheme of things, I would not write that personally if I had just killed the love of my life and was about to take my own life.

*You see, what I've been getting at, is ever since I was born, I was meant to die here. - I would probably not write, you see, as it is best used in a very factual context, where something prior to the You see is being involved and referred to. Her death is not hinted to, as far as I can tell, and so it breaks into the mind of the reader, when it is not really needed. The same goes for what I've been getting at. If you'd like to keep it, I would also suggest you write one or the other, as they both entail nearly the same semantics in this context, and these put together produce a very oral tone usually not found in writing.

*The I'll come back and haunt you sentence might be a bit too humorous, for someone being dead serious, and who seems to be in grave suffering, but maybe I read the character wrong.

I think you should not end the letter with "goodbye", as that is not something you write in a letter to the "world" or strangers, but rather in a suicide not to friends and families and bullies and such, if you follow.

The ending ending was good.

It was an original piece of story writing, with good length, and easily readable, and overall good work. I was not as baffled away with it as Krypson was however, as I actually missed some emotion, in the piece overall, I realize she has been trained to hold it back but it still came across as somewhat flat. There were many single sentences that did not naturally progress into the next, something I have major problems with doing myself, but when I do it I can feel how much better the text flows in my mouth.

On a side note I think it would be "cooler".. haha, if they were fighting for personhood, the right to be considered a person, which is a question within philosophy and law. Technically there can and do exist human beings, that have limited rights as they are not recognized as persons. If an alien species landed here tommorrow, the law would recognize and treat them as people, even if they are not human.

Overall an enjoyable read. And I do realize I'm not the most competent critique-dude, and so I hope you bare with me

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Lhyrre In reply to Liedy [2012-03-20 21:54:59 +0000 UTC]

... I'm going to send you all my short stories in the future. I hope you know this. Thank you SO much for the thoughtful review! I may not change everything you mentioned, as some of it is "voice" and it's not in "story" format, it's someone writing a letter, but other than that, most of your comments are valid. I've been waiting for someone to give me a review like this. Something I can USE.

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Liedy In reply to Lhyrre [2012-03-21 05:55:31 +0000 UTC]

Haha sure, just don't send me stories of love and hate without an interesting twist to them. Extreme emotions bore me. You are most welcome, and I hope it useful

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Lhyrre In reply to Liedy [2012-03-22 23:11:20 +0000 UTC]

Blegh, I don't write stories about love. I write stories about plot that happen to have love in them sometimes.

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Krypson [2012-03-19 18:47:29 +0000 UTC]

Just a sec, gotta pick my jaw off the floor and shove my heart back down my throat...

...There we are... and WOW! What a story! What emotion! What beautiful writing... What to say?

And you want a critique? Well, I am afraid that I would be useless there because I was too enthralled with the story to notice any mistakes or areas for improvement......sorry!
I wonder what happens next...

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Lhyrre In reply to Krypson [2012-03-19 20:52:49 +0000 UTC]

Thanks so much!!! I'm glad you like it! I edited it some, as some parts seemed a little awkward when I read it again.

And I honestly didn't plan on making this more than a short story, but I seem to be getting demands from all sides to write more of it, so I think I'll write it Dracula-style - through letters and journals and such - and probably out of chronological order, if at all.

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Krypson In reply to Lhyrre [2012-03-19 21:28:57 +0000 UTC]

Ohh hohh! Shaking things up eh?

Well , yes, I would love to see a continuation of this story, so long as you are willing.

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Lhyrre In reply to Krypson [2012-03-19 22:32:57 +0000 UTC]

I don't know if I will have a continuation chronologically, but I'll definitely write more in that plot.

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Krypson In reply to Lhyrre [2012-03-20 01:45:18 +0000 UTC]

I look forward to it.

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Lhyrre In reply to Krypson [2012-03-20 03:40:24 +0000 UTC]

I finished editing the story, btw! It's a bit different now.

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