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Description
Its night now and I'm still awake. I think Dean is surprised I didn't run off last night, I did think about it I ain't gonna lie, but I have been looking for these boys for a long time and now that I found them why would I run off now? I'm tired of being alone.Whatever there gonna do in this war....maybe I should help, I haven't told them about the angel after me, figured I'd tell them tomorrow. When I figure out what to say.
How to explain it right. Cause even I don't know why Zachariah is trying to get me to there side, I'm I supposed to be a vessel for Micheal....no that can't be it, maybe for another angel or they just wanna get rid of me. After so many generations what if they just wanna start over? If that's the case then I'm gonna die in this war....
My warding on my arms hasn't faded yet. That angel....Castiel, he could sense I was warded I knew it, but he didn't tell the others. I can still smell him like hes still here....maybe he is, he did seem different too me but I still hate angels, I don't want anything to do with them. The angels were one thing I was taught about when I was young, they were one of the first lessons, how they watch over us and protect us. That is was a honor to be keepers of gods sword.
But none of my family ever really met an angel, there are no records of any of my ancestors with any angel, probably except the first wielder. And the stories are pretty much faded in time. None of my family knew what an angel really was, and I think maybe that was for the best, my grandma would be so disappointed if she knew. It was all any of us knew. Why we trained and fought, because we were personally chosen, it was in our blood. If my grandma knew the truth, I think it would have destroyed her.

April 11
I didn't sleep well last night. I kept expecting to be killed last night, it was probably the nightmare I had, I always have bad dreams anymore. Whether its all this stuff going on or the constant running, I'm not sure, Sam was the first one awake...hes out making breakfast now. He seems the more understanding of my two brothers, so I should try and talk with him first. I can smell the bacon and the eggs in he air, I'm so fucking hungry I may wait till after I eat.

I waited after breakfast and I begun to tell Sam about the angel, I showed him the warding on my arms I kept drawing on with my pen, so stained in my skin it may just be permanent now for all I know. He waited till I was done talking, never interrupted me once, he was worried about me afterwards. Told me we would fix it and now that I was here he and Dean wouldn't let anyone hurt me, I almost told him about my curse for a moment but I was too afraid too, but if I don't tell them soon they may find out in the worst way and not trust me. And I want to be trusted, I do, Dean he treats me like I'm a bad guy. Is it the shock that he has a sister, or that our father kept it from him and is taking it out on me?
I need to talk to Dean or I should just keep my distance away from him for awhile, he has this look I don't particularly like, I've notice in the short time I've been here he drinks more then he should with the alcohol. So does that Bobby character too, must be a hunter thing or an adult thing when they have issues, I was never allowed alcohol in my grandmas house. She'd have hit my head with her cane if I so much as touched the stuff at my age, I ain't really above age here, I'm only seventeen. Which that Bobby told them both how old I was too, so I doubt they'll give me a drink either. Anyway....I'm getting to into the subject here, and when I die and people read this I don't want anyone thinking I'm obsessed with liquor.After I talked with Sam I went outside to practice with my sword, hitting at junk around the yard, slicing tired on old junkers. Had to keep in shape, since I've been on my own I've been malnourished and underweight, I know I should have ate more but it was hard when I never had money. Its why I got so good at stealing and pick pocketing. I'm a regular pro here!
I don't know if the boys would approve yet or not, I know hunters don't make any money, they require fake credit cards everywhere they go. That I know. Which is better, silent pick pocketing or credit card fraud to be noticed by the government? Fake names or not and with my curse I don't need that much attention, I'd probably end up in some secret government facility on a desection table.When I finished practicing I heard Dean's voice outside, he was actually calling me by my name, I preferred Red though....its what my grandmother always called me. Nicknamed after my one ancestor, but I'll explain that later. Dean wanted to talk to me, actually talk to me after what....a day or two of silence while Sam has been talking my ears off, he asked me if I knew our dad but I told him I never met him. I didn't like him anyway either, he left my mom and never bothered visiting her while she was dying in the hospital, I do regret that hes dead though...I'll never get the chance to tell him off. I didn't tell Dean any of that though. I don't need him mad at me when hes finally talking. After all....John was there for them.Dean said he talked with Sam and he explained to him the angel after me, they knew the angel, he said he was a royal douche and that I needed warded better from him. When he talked about the warding on his ribs I about chocked, I wouldn't even know how that would work, then he told me Castiel done it to them both to keep them hidden. Makes better sense now. I told him I don't think I would want that, course I doubt he would have let it go just like that, if a tattoo hurts then carvings on your ribs would be ten thousand fold more painful!
I feel I have no choice in the matter though, he said he would get Cas to do it soon, maybe when we all hit the road again. He told me it doesn't hurt for very long, yeah like that reassures me right now, all I can imagine is my ribs set aflame. Or a knife between my ribs just carving away.
I have been stabbed before and it didn't feel good in the least bit, good thing that it wasn't a very large knife or in any vital organs, or I wouldn't be here right now. Once Dean stopped talking he suggested an anti possession tattoo, just like Sam, told him like I told Sam. I'd think about it. We went back inside the house soon after, Dean still doesn't trust me but he's giving me the chance to prove myself, he even had me look on Sam's computer for a hunt. I'm not as tech savey so it took awhile, I think he wanted to test me to make sure I knew what I was looking for and what I was doing, I found one and wrote the town and addresses down of recent killings and gave it to him. It seemed I passed, whether it was gonna be an actual monster or just some crazy person remains to be seen, from personal experience people are fucking out of there mind. Paranoid hunters in particular. I had a few after me in the past, always shot before they asked questions, I managed to avoid them except this one black man. Pure crazy. I never knew what happened to him, if he died or was torn apart by some monster, it would be no great loss there. Least he was off my ass.
People never grow accustom to the strange, specially me, its why I wear sunglasses in public. Day and night. I'm scared of what they'll think, what they'll say and what they'll do to me if they find out that I'm not a normal human. I know I need to tell the boys but I'm afriad.
April 12
So we packed up our stuff or least Sam and Dean did, I always keep my stuff in my bag, we put our stuff in the trunk of the car all except my sword. I didn't like it being tucked away, I preferred it beside me. They said there goodbyes to the old man, I simply just waved and got in the back of the car, we're on the road now and heading to the town I found the hunt in. The boys are talking up front while the radio is blasting old music, meanwhile I'm keeping busy talking to myself through this journal, Dean definitely doesn't know the word slow...cause I'm pretty sure we're going over the speed limit right now.
One of these days he might actually get pulled over. About the hunt I found, good chance it has something to do with an everyday shapeshifter, or a skinwalker, either way I get to kill something and get another step towards the boys trusting me.

Description
Its night now and I'm still awake. I think Dean is surprised I didn't run off last night, I did think about it I ain't gonna lie, but I have been looking for these boys for a long time and now that I found them why would I run off now? I'm tired of being alone.Whatever there gonna do in this war....maybe I should help, I haven't told them about the angel after me, figured I'd tell them tomorrow. When I figure out what to say.
How to explain it right. Cause even I don't know why Zachariah is trying to get me to there side, I'm I supposed to be a vessel for Micheal....no that can't be it, maybe for another angel or they just wanna get rid of me. After so many generations what if they just wanna start over? If that's the case then I'm gonna die in this war....
My warding on my arms hasn't faded yet. That angel....Castiel, he could sense I was warded I knew it, but he didn't tell the others. I can still smell him like hes still here....maybe he is, he did seem different too me but I still hate angels, I don't want anything to do with them. The angels were one thing I was taught about when I was young, they were one of the first lessons, how they watch over us and protect us. That is was a honor to be keepers of gods sword.
But none of my family ever really met an angel, there are no records of any of my ancestors with any angel, probably except the first wielder. And the stories are pretty much faded in time. None of my family knew what an angel really was, and I think maybe that was for the best, my grandma would be so disappointed if she knew. It was all any of us knew. Why we trained and fought, because we were personally chosen, it was in our blood. If my grandma knew the truth, I think it would have destroyed her.

April 11
I didn't sleep well last night. I kept expecting to be killed last night, it was probably the nightmare I had, I always have bad dreams anymore. Whether its all this stuff going on or the constant running, I'm not sure, Sam was the first one awake...hes out making breakfast now. He seems the more understanding of my two brothers, so I should try and talk with him first. I can smell the bacon and the eggs in he air, I'm so fucking hungry I may wait till after I eat.

I waited after breakfast and I begun to tell Sam about the angel, I showed him the warding on my arms I kept drawing on with my pen, so stained in my skin it may just be permanent now for all I know. He waited till I was done talking, never interrupted me once, he was worried about me afterwards. Told me we would fix it and now that I was here he and Dean wouldn't let anyone hurt me, I almost told him about my curse for a moment but I was too afraid too, but if I don't tell them soon they may find out in the worst way and not trust me. And I want to be trusted, I do, Dean he treats me like I'm a bad guy. Is it the shock that he has a sister, or that our father kept it from him and is taking it out on me?
I need to talk to Dean or I should just keep my distance away from him for awhile, he has this look I don't particularly like, I've notice in the short time I've been here he drinks more then he should with the alcohol. So does that Bobby character too, must be a hunter thing or an adult thing when they have issues, I was never allowed alcohol in my grandmas house. She'd have hit my head with her cane if I so much as touched the stuff at my age, I ain't really above age here, I'm only seventeen. Which that Bobby told them both how old I was too, so I doubt they'll give me a drink either. Anyway....I'm getting to into the subject here, and when I die and people read this I don't want anyone thinking I'm obsessed with liquor.After I talked with Sam I went outside to practice with my sword, hitting at junk around the yard, slicing tired on old junkers. Had to keep in shape, since I've been on my own I've been malnourished and underweight, I know I should have ate more but it was hard when I never had money. Its why I got so good at stealing and pick pocketing. I'm a regular pro here!
I don't know if the boys would approve yet or not, I know hunters don't make any money, they require fake credit cards everywhere they go. That I know. Which is better, silent pick pocketing or credit card fraud to be noticed by the government? Fake names or not and with my curse I don't need that much attention, I'd probably end up in some secret government facility on a desection table.When I finished practicing I heard Dean's voice outside, he was actually calling me by my name, I preferred Red though....its what my grandmother always called me. Nicknamed after my one ancestor, but I'll explain that later. Dean wanted to talk to me, actually talk to me after what....a day or two of silence while Sam has been talking my ears off, he asked me if I knew our dad but I told him I never met him. I didn't like him anyway either, he left my mom and never bothered visiting her while she was dying in the hospital, I do regret that hes dead though...I'll never get the chance to tell him off. I didn't tell Dean any of that though. I don't need him mad at me when hes finally talking. After all....John was there for them.Dean said he talked with Sam and he explained to him the angel after me, they knew the angel, he said he was a royal douche and that I needed warded better from him. When he talked about the warding on his ribs I about chocked, I wouldn't even know how that would work, then he told me Castiel done it to them both to keep them hidden. Makes better sense now. I told him I don't think I would want that, course I doubt he would have let it go just like that, if a tattoo hurts then carvings on your ribs would be ten thousand fold more painful!
I feel I have no choice in the matter though, he said he would get Cas to do it soon, maybe when we all hit the road again. He told me it doesn't hurt for very long, yeah like that reassures me right now, all I can imagine is my ribs set aflame. Or a knife between my ribs just carving away.
I have been stabbed before and it didn't feel good in the least bit, good thing that it wasn't a very large knife or in any vital organs, or I wouldn't be here right now. Once Dean stopped talking he suggested an anti possession tattoo, just like Sam, told him like I told Sam. I'd think about it. We went back inside the house soon after, Dean still doesn't trust me but he's giving me the chance to prove myself, he even had me look on Sam's computer for a hunt. I'm not as tech savey so it took awhile, I think he wanted to test me to make sure I knew what I was looking for and what I was doing, I found one and wrote the town and addresses down of recent killings and gave it to him. It seemed I passed, whether it was gonna be an actual monster or just some crazy person remains to be seen, from personal experience people are fucking out of there mind. Paranoid hunters in particular. I had a few after me in the past, always shot before they asked questions, I managed to avoid them except this one black man. Pure crazy. I never knew what happened to him, if he died or was torn apart by some monster, it would be no great loss there. Least he was off my ass.
People never grow accustom to the strange, specially me, its why I wear sunglasses in public. Day and night. I'm scared of what they'll think, what they'll say and what they'll do to me if they find out that I'm not a normal human. I know I need to tell the boys but I'm afriad.
April 12
So we packed up our stuff or least Sam and Dean did, I always keep my stuff in my bag, we put our stuff in the trunk of the car all except my sword. I didn't like it being tucked away, I preferred it beside me. They said there goodbyes to the old man, I simply just waved and got in the back of the car, we're on the road now and heading to the town I found the hunt in. The boys are talking up front while the radio is blasting old music, meanwhile I'm keeping busy talking to myself through this journal, Dean definitely doesn't know the word slow...cause I'm pretty sure we're going over the speed limit right now.
One of these days he might actually get pulled over. About the hunt I found, good chance it has something to do with an everyday shapeshifter, or a skinwalker, either way I get to kill something and get another step towards the boys trusting me.