HOME | DD
LunaCarminus β Through Yonder Window
Published: 2010-01-26 22:10:53 +0000 UTC; Views: 1253; Favourites: 46; Downloads: 0
Redirect to original
Description
Update: Thanks to all those who gave me feedback and helpful insight on this piece. Hope to have a painted version of this in the fairly near future.Okay, we'll try this again...
Colored pencil. Actually this was inspired by an old Halloween decoration at my office, a round sunset pic with big cartoon bats and a cherubic blonde child at center dressed as a witch.
So I need help on this one. Any general comments are welcome, of course, but specifically I'm concerned with the lighting and shadow, especially on the gown and shoulders. The effect I'd like to achieve on the gown is one of voluminous but very black fabric, maybe something along the lines of taffeta or stiff satin. Trying for a regal yet slightly sinister air. Colored pencil makes this hard to do, particularly when I have no model. Does the gown look at all realistic? Does anyone have suggestions as to how I could improve the texture?
The same goes for the bay; does the water look realistically reflective, yet still seem to merge with the sky? (Note: I'm not going for a "real" sunset here, just a sort of impression of one. Main focus is supposed to be the resonance between the woman's dress & pale hair and the dark land masses under an equally pale sky).
A third issue is the woman's head/ neck. I deliberately turned her gaze away from the viewer to a degree that she really HAS no face, just the suggestion of one; but I had a hard time deciding how much of her facial structure would logically be revealed at that angle. So any pointers there would be helpful as well.
Oh, and the rose-vine border: is it too small, too neat, too distracting? Does it add or detract from the image overall? I wanted something definitely black to frame the shot and to compliment the black gown.
Those are my key concerns. I'm toying with the idea of turning this into a painting, just to get it in smoother tones and perhaps richer colors.
So comments welcome!
Related content
Comments: 57
The lighting is fine; it just needs more color. You've been using some oranges and purples around the edges, which should probably reflect the lighting on her dress better (instead of straight white, make some of them yellow, perhaps). You may also consider using purple for the darker highlights for the darker regions. It's kind of hard to explain if you don't quite know what I mean yet.
As for the water, the problem is that there doesn't really seem to be much above the water that can be reflected on its surface, so don't worry about it too much. However, some yellow highlights from the sky may make it look better.
Personally, I think her face is fine from that angle. They're usually not easy to draw from this angle because you're stuck not knowing if there are enough details, but since you did say you wanted her face turned away, and her facial expression isn't the focus of the piece, I wouldn't worry about needing to add more details.
π: 0 β©: 1
I'd thought about changing the highlights on the dress, but not so much the shadows. Yet another possibility to consider for the revision. Thanks!
π: 0 β©: 0
This image is so beautiful! I love the design of the women's dress. As for her face. It appears as though at least part of her eye would be showing at this angle.
π: 0 β©: 0
I LOVE the rose vine border, it's such a beautiful and delicate addition to the drawing. Very lovely, all of it.
I would try to add more definition to the subject's face, she looks a tad bit more cartoon-like in the face.
π: 0 β©: 1
Glad you like it; I was worried that it might be too artificial. And the face definitely tops the list for revision. Thanks for your comments!
π: 0 β©: 0
This is a beautiful image. I love the concept and the colours you used. The gown's folds are really nice!
About the colouring, I think that you need to make it smoother. Make the blacks, blacker. [link] Maybe you can use some ink? The highlight tone seems spot on.
Her shoulders look good to me. The neck however seems a little stiff. Perhaps it needs to be a tiny bit forward. A little like here: [link]
The cheek that we see, seems to need a little flattening on the lower part and maybe a hint of eye showing. It's a very difficult angle, but I think the hind of nose you left is just right. If changing the shape and adding a little eyelash makes it seem like she's looking even more towards the background, then the nose might need a little reduction.
I think the water and the sky look perfect. The frame is lovely.
I hope this is useful to you.
#GimmeFeedback
π: 0 β©: 1
Thank you so much for the links! I did try to find models to use while putting this piece together, but it seems I can never find quite what I'm looking for when I'm actually looking for it!
π: 0 β©: 1
I have the same problem! I'm going to start an archive soon.
And you're very welcome.
π: 0 β©: 0
Well I love this, it's very beautiful and relaxing. To me it tells the story of the girl getting tired of the party and taking her wine outside and watching the sunset. The dress is very pretty and I think the folds were well done. The pattern encircling the whole image is a nice container as well.
I think in order to make her look like she fits in better you could have brought in the orange from the sun and sky into the dress and especially the skin. For the face I understand where you were going with it, but since you can see her nose I feel like you should see at least the outermost corner of her eye, even if only that. If you ever do paint this (I recommend it!), then try taking out the border and instead giving us a little more, like what is she sitting on, where exactly is she? If you still want something to compliment the blackness of her dress try just fading it out to black.
Hope I helped, this really is lovely!
π: 0 β©: 1
Yes, definitely going to be reshaping her face on the revision. I think the border can seem abrupt because of the white space beyond; I've wondered if a round frame would change that effect. Thanks for the comments!
π: 0 β©: 0
I'm concerned with the lighting and shadow, especially on the gown and shoulders. Does the gown look at all realistic? Does anyone have suggestions as to how I could improve the texture?
I really like the dress, and I think you've done exceptionally well with the shading. You've included some very subtle highlights in the black fabric that look very realistic, and the form is quite stunning.
The only thing I don't think is, you know, absolutely perfect is that the dress doesn't look smooth, it looks rough, mostly. I think this is because of the pencil crayons you used, so I'm not sure of how you could fix this. And you're probably aware of it already, but I was just letting you know.
The same goes for the bay; does the water look realistically reflective, yet still seem to merge with the sky?
I love the water/horizon, especially because of how the water merges with the sky. Yet it is still obvious that it is water because of the land that you included, even if the colour is very similar. Great job, I think it worked out perfectly.
A third issue is the woman's head/ neck. So any pointers there would be helpful as well.
I have no problem with the woman's face at all, except that, same with the dress, it seems to be rough, which is a bit unavoidable, I guess. Great perspective, especially without a model for reference!
Oh, and the rose-vine border: is it too small, too neat, too distracting? Does it add or detract from the image overall?
I absolutely love the border. It's one of my favourite parts of this piece, because it goes way beyond just being a border, you know what I mean? I think it's a work of art all by itself! Also, the way the woman is half out of the frame is awesome as well.
Really great!
π: 0 β©: 1
Yes, rough texture is one of the drawbacks of colored pencil vs. paint, which is why I'm toying with the idea of trying an acrylic version of this at some point. Glad you like the border. I need some way to balance out the black of the gown, and thought a frame around the whole thing might work well. Then once it was there, I wondered if it was too precise. Comes from staring too long at the same picture, I suppose.
Thanks for the detailed feedback; it's really helpful.
π: 0 β©: 1
you have there a really nice drawing is a really nice concept and the women w. the wine cup look so nice the colors and everything, and frame of rose look really nice....the details of everything is so nice!! I just like it!
π: 0 β©: 1
Overall, I really like how this picture is working out. If you do transfer it to paint, I would try to make the background sunset a little more vibrant. It fades out subtly in the pencil version, which is okay, but to improve it imo, add more color. The dress looks deep and rich to start with. Would try experimenting with various shades and hues of highlights to add a little more sheen to the dress if you want to try more.
I hope it helps.
π: 0 β©: 1
Many thanks for your suggestions. I did leave the sunset intentionally pale, but I think just changing from pencil to paint will help smooth out the texture overall and make the tones a little richer (at least I hope it will!)
π: 0 β©: 1
That was what I was thinking. Good luck with it! I'd love to see the painted version too.
π: 0 β©: 0
This is a beautiful picture. Because you brought up concern over conveying the dresses texture, why not look up the very fabrics you named? There are more than enough pictures on dresses and their respective materials online. If you have the internet, almost everything you need reference-wise is at your fingertips. If you do not, check out the library.
π: 0 β©: 1
I actually did try to find a model when I was sketching the dress; it just seemed that nothing I found was quite what I needed. You're right, though; there are certainly library resources when the internet fails! Thanks for the suggestion.
π: 0 β©: 1
I know what you mean. It isn't always easy to find the references you need.
π: 0 β©: 0
This is beautiful!! Here are my suggestions
Fabrics with a high gloss like taffeta and satin have high contrast, meaning where light hits is very light compared to wear there is shadow, so by adding more intense highlights to the dress you can give more of that silky effect. Also regarding her face, you wouldn't see that much of her nose from that angle unless it was very long maybe just the tip of it ^^
π: 0 β©: 1
Very true on both points. I think smaller nose is definitely a point for revision, but I haven't decided yet whether to go for more gloss on the fabric or less. Thanks for your comments!
π: 0 β©: 1
I was instantly drawn to this! The colors of the sky and the beauty of the border is just perfect. I think the shading on her dress is really well done.
I'm a little iffy about the visibility of her nose. I like what an above commenter said, that her eye (or at least eyelashes?) would be visible at this angle.
I think the glass of wine is an excellent touch, and brings a much appreciated accent color. I would also love to see a bit of blues or greens in the fabric she's leaning on, to widen your color spectrum even more.
Excellent job overall!
π: 0 β©: 1
I've had a couple suggestions about adding more colors, which I hadn't though about when composing the picture. Original thought was to keep it mostly yellow and black, and to have hues in the scenery reflected somewhere on the sitting figure, red wine glass excepted. Perhaps I'll play around with that idea. Thanks!
π: 0 β©: 0
A powerful piece with a melancholy mood.
1. I thought of satin before I read your comment and I can hear the sound it will make when she gets up, so yeah, it looks realistic. The highlights are nicely done.
2. The water looks great, especially the reflections and it merges well with the sky.
3. I think that her eye might be visible at that angle, but I'm not that good at anatomy. I don't think it matters, though, and leaving her faceless like that adds to the impact of the picture.
4. It's perfect and I love how it repeats itself in her gloves and her hairdo.
I would love to see it as a painting.
π: 0 β©: 1
I'm glad you noticed the rose motif in the hair and gloves. I almost left the gloves out because I was afraid it would be too much, and then once I'd added them I wondered if they were even noticeable.
Thanks for the comments!
π: 0 β©: 1
The roses in her hair was almost the first thing that caught my eye
π: 0 β©: 1
Thanks. I appreciate little coordinating details like that in real life, so I often include them in my artwork.
π: 0 β©: 0
This probably is the most impressive artwork I've seen lately.
Colored pencils create an amazing subtle texture thorough the work, it creates that unique feel this drawing has.
This style really reminds me something... something I haven't seen for at least a decade. Can't recall what it is, though...
I'm really sorry for not giving a through critique, but to me - the mere viewer who can't draw for life - the piece looks simply perfect.
π: 0 β©: 1
Thank you for the compliments. I actually like pencils for the subtlety they allow. Paint offers richer tones and smoother textures, but unless I'm painting on a very large scale, I find it hard to get the same details and precision as with pencils.
π: 0 β©: 0
Hi 
The dress looks very nice. I don't know how much colors scanner took out of it, but I think coloring some places almost completly black would help. You mentioned you wanted satn or taffeta to show up, and as far as I remember, they are smooth materials with almost no texture, at least in places without light (that's why I think about coloring it that way). But unfortunately I don't know any techniques like Wulf86 to share about lightning other places. And so I agree too, that painting it is a good idea.
About the bay, I already said what I think
About the face, if you wanted the "feel" that she has no face then it's pretty much okay. About logic - normally, when you turn your head like that, an eye will still be visible. So at this angle her right eye would be visible and also you could accent a little that dent for an eye (where the skull has an "eye"... was that called eye-socket or something?). And I think the nose sticks out accurately here then. If you want for the eye not to show, you should view head amost from behind (and then the nose isn't visible). Also I think the jaw goes a bit to far to the back. Normally it "connects" with the ear, where the ear is connected with face (sorry for messy explanation, my english sucks 
The border is very nice, it fits the image nicely and makes it "complete" and also more interesting (compared to "standard" border or no border at all). I like how you changed it's pattern at the bottom, where it's the only element of the boder that doesn't connect with the sky. A subtle touch, but a good effect. The downside is that it blends too much with girl's hair ornament which also is black and in the same style. At first I thought her hair is covered by a sticking out element of border. Or is it a broder? I'm still not sure about it.
Overall a great drawing and excellent use of colors too. Good job and keep it up
π: 0 β©: 1
I did wonder about her nose and eye, but decided to leave it and see what other viewers thought. Actually the hair "ornament" is a continuation of the border; it sort of twines and twists its way into her natural hair. There are a couple loops of blond hair if you look closely, but maybe they are hard to see.
Thanks a lot for the comments!
π: 0 β©: 0
Riktigt snygg. Jag gillar "ramen" eller vad man ska kalla det
π: 0 β©: 1
It's a little awkward to confess that I don't understand your message, but it looks like a compliment, so I'll just say Thanks!
π: 0 β©: 1
Well I can tell you as well that I felt even more awkward. I was so sure you were Swedish when I wrote that. I must have been blind.
What I pretty much said was that I liked the border she sits at and also the way she sits and look "out"
π: 0 β©: 0
Ok my opinion is the rose border is amazing. Any bigger it would over-power, and smaller it would just look rushed. The water and dress are well done. Nothing that jumps out as a flaw at all. The face angle probably could show a bit more face.. but really it isn't something that sticks out as off until you pointed it out. But overall this is beautiful, and very well done. I really like the colour choices.
π: 0 β©: 1
Thank you. Every once in a while I do a piece just to satisfy my own need for color and mood, and I think this one works well in that respect, at least. Glad you like it!
π: 0 β©: 0
Im pretty blown away. Its I nicely inspiring piece i find, I agree with other comments here about critique with thenose and clour depth but This is wonderfull.
π: 0 β©: 1
The fact that this is done is pencil is amazing. Love how the colors of the sunset blend together.
π: 0 β©: 1
Thanks. I'm a sucker for smooth fading hues, like sunsets or deepening water. I guess it stimulates the "color" parts of my brain.
π: 0 β©: 0
Wow, this is STUNNING! The only thing I would really do is define the face outline more. Just to separate them from the background. You really achieved the dress and sunset that you said you wanted! Well done!
π: 0 β©: 1
1. Pencils do have their limitations. The problem is that satin has a smooth gradient between colors, something that's hard to achieve with pencils.
I can sugest this to you (itΒ΄s something IΒ΄ve done with markers before). Get a white dry pastel, scrape it with a knife (or anything that cuts). Then get yourself a small soft cloth (something like felt), small enough that you can hold it around the point of your finger. Put the cloth in the powder, and use it to do those lighted areas (as much as needed). The stronger higlights you use the white pencil.
2. No issues here
3.I have a problem with her nose. To figure out how much of the nose sticks out, draw it first the face as seen from the front (in the same angle). The amount of it that goes beyond the cheek is the amount that should be visible from behind.
4. No problems here either.
5. I vote yes for painting it (curious to see how diferent it will look).
Great image!!
π: 0 β©: 1
Yes, it turned out to be more difficult than expected to get subtle variation with nothing but a black pencil. Actually, as a child I discovered that white pencil over black Sharpie makes a very realistic-looking fabric, something along the lines of light wool or cotton. Trouble is, the Sharpie bleeds through any paper lighter than poster board...
Thanks for the suggestions. It looks like the face will be my main focus for revision.
π: 0 β©: 0
very nice piece, you have the shadows and lights well placed, so the only comment i can make is about the colors. Even if the fabric is black, the light of the sunset would be warm (yellows, oranges) while the shadows will be cool (blues, purples, cool greens). Adding more colors generally make pictures livelier :]
π: 0 β©: 1
| Next =>