MrParaduo [2009-08-12 13:19:14 +0000 UTC]

Short and simple...but I feel a need to say that there's so much potential that your missing out on by leaving it so small! Like a seed just breaking out of the earth because it's begun to sprout, only for an impetuous farmer to pull it out and feed to an ungrateful sheep.
Let's see...AHA! Try playing inspirational music in the background as you write your poetry, thus giving a focus for your muse to enter the physical realm through and aid thee in creating art worthy of admiration! For this one...try: Devils never cry, it's a song made with two parts, a demon, and a clear (angel?) the clear is my favorite part, but the demon could help aid you in making a monster more apparent of what a vampire is, while the clear helps make it so you remember that there's an exception every rule (a good vampire?)

P.S: Flesh it all out, it's like drawing, start with a rough stetch, rub away the excess and unneccissary, and polish the good while leaving alone the perfect.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

3wyl [2009-05-13 19:29:05 +0000 UTC]

Ooh! Interesting indeed. I really like how you've written this.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1