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meevilmonkey — Twice - mm
Published: 2003-07-28 06:48:36 +0000 UTC; Views: 95; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 6
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Description
Twice I loved andTwice I lost.
Twice I tried with all my heart,
But it still did fall apart.
Twice I wanted it so bad,
That it almost sent me mad.
Twice I have been left alone,
To fight this all on my own.
Twice now I\'ve been burnt,
And this same lesson I have learnt.
Twice because of you I tried,
to commit suicide.
Twice. Never again, no more,
To my heart I close the door.
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Comments: 6
Ooooh, it's sad. The repetativeness is nothing to worry about; if anything, it makes this piece stronger. Once again, nice work.
~ Jamsa ~
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Repeatitiveness is normally annoying, but it fit's well for this type of poem. It goes with the title. Once again, rhyming scheme is actually great! Nice piece of writing here Erin.
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I agree with hellboundangel. Suicide is stupid, and quite pointless. It's the selfish, easy way out. Anyway, as for the poem itself, it's not bad at all. I've probably told you this a lot, but I don't enjoy angsty poetry, yet I can't deny that it's well written. It's clever too. Nice rhyme scheme.
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still don't know what to say, but erin, nobody is worth making you want to kill yourself. you're a beautiful person, and if someone breaks your heart then they don't deserve you. you'll find someone, it may take time but nobody knows whats in the future so dont give up hope just yet, theres plenty to still be done,
your poetry is beautiful, it really makes me feel your emotions here. soldier on, and don't give up just yet.
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stay strong, it's the only way to get through that crap! although it's hypocritical of me, you shouldn't let anyone make you want to commit suicide! no matter how much you love them and even thought it hurts!
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Very nice 
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