HOME | DD

Description
SHOPPING IS A FEELING

Photo source: www.pexels.com/@davidedegiovan…

Text for translation:
Wait, wait, you’re actually the new guy they hired? Ugh, really?! Look, let me just get this out of the way and just say that I used to literally do your job: things like restocking and telling people what aisle to find stuff and, y’know, that kind of thing. It looks like they replaced me super fast, and I’m not actually trying to be like a total bitch here, but I don’t think you’ll even last a week.
I’ll give you some kind advice as, uhm, a veteran to the profession and just say that it’s not easy work. No, I’m not even talking about “putting on a friendly face” for the customers. If you want some pointers, then I kind of just suggest leaving before you collapse under the pressure. Sorry, it’s just, I don’t know, you don’t really seem like you’re even cut out for this position. I wasn’t, either, so don’t take it personally or anything.
No, so they didn’t tell me either, but this store kind of has an insatiable lust for eager consumers. Uhm, yeah, I basically just said this store craves nothing more than to satisfy the customer’s every need and desire. God, you actually still don’t get it, do you? I guess I’ll go slower so even you can understand. I’m not talking about the manager or the executives or anyone; the store itself hungers for, y’know, loyal shoppers to purchase its high-quality products.
And with deals like these, I mean, who could ever say no? It’s like: there’s no need to shop or exist anywhere else except here, now. Wait, you still don’t get it. Guess I literally have to explain everything, huh? Okay, so basically this place will nudge you — entice you — to seek out Aisle 13, where all demographically ideal consumers are born to be. Trust me, it starts as just a little, gentle hum in your mind, but soon it crescendoes into a maddening cacophony. Or something like that.
That’s probably when I, uhm, should have just quit the job and left. But I sort of liked the long, late hours. I liked feeling appreciated and special, and the store made it clear I was, y’know, such a irreplaceable asset to the stocking team. I guess I even felt, like, unconditionally loved, maybe? A nagging absence would come over me whenever I was away from this establishment and its unbelievable deals. “Like highway robbery.” That’s totally true, though. I wouldn’t dare shop anywhere else. Not anymore.
There was a certain night shift in a blur of, y’know, countless night shifts when I discovered my true calling; I needed to set an example and become a perfect consumer, someone other shoppers could admire and even envy. In doing so, I literally proved myself worthy enough to walk Aisle 13. It stood before me, like, plain as day, and I never even doubted its existence. I could only feel gratitude, because it’s just such an honor to shop there.
And, by then, it was seriously way too late for me to turn back. I couldn’t keep my eyes off the glorious items lining the shelves. Y’see, Aisle 13 provides everything the customer would ever need for their personal perfection. It lets the shopper become desirable to the products they wish to buy in the future. It’s a wonder of marketing, ‘cause it, uhm, designs people for the products instead of the other way around.
The store showed me everything I needed to be a perfect and consistent buyer. “Snarky ’n Superior” was a total must-have for my conversational flavor, and I grabbed basically anything and everything to check off my demographically desirable shopping list. Every new item made me feel even better about myself. Shopping was supposed to be an experience. It was supposed to make me feel happy and good about myself. For once, I literally felt good about what I wanted, because what I wanted was good. Or something like that.
But, uhm, consuming is totally about how you look to other consumers, so my look as an unkempt, low-wage stocking guy was…just no. I needed a makeover, and, store-to-the-rescue, I got exactly what I needed. It was so simple and easy for me to pick a new face and hair and body, to just slip them on and throw away the old undesirable aspects. Actually, this whole look came as a combined “NooYoo Skin,” only the zipper, uhm, sort of sealed up forever as soon as I put it on. Not that I care. Now, I get to look totally amazing while I look for totally amazing deals.
Oh, yeah, this outfit, these nails, everything you see here: also all available on Aisle 13. You can find everything there, including self actualization or something like that. There’s actually no reason for me to ever leave, especially since it’s open all the time. Uhm, I guess you’re still confused and, like, some of us are just more visual learners. I, for sure, get it. But I just wanted to tell you what the managers literally won’t. They never told me just how perfect this place really is.
Yeah, it’s totally not my problem, but I thought you should know what it’s like to work here, at least. It’s really funny that I have to tell an employee about the layout of the store they work at, though. I guess even a guy like you will eventually get acquainted with all the aisles. Until then, can you at least try and keep the customers satisfied?

Description
SHOPPING IS A FEELING

Photo source: www.pexels.com/@davidedegiovan…

Text for translation:
Wait, wait, you’re actually the new guy they hired? Ugh, really?! Look, let me just get this out of the way and just say that I used to literally do your job: things like restocking and telling people what aisle to find stuff and, y’know, that kind of thing. It looks like they replaced me super fast, and I’m not actually trying to be like a total bitch here, but I don’t think you’ll even last a week.
I’ll give you some kind advice as, uhm, a veteran to the profession and just say that it’s not easy work. No, I’m not even talking about “putting on a friendly face” for the customers. If you want some pointers, then I kind of just suggest leaving before you collapse under the pressure. Sorry, it’s just, I don’t know, you don’t really seem like you’re even cut out for this position. I wasn’t, either, so don’t take it personally or anything.
No, so they didn’t tell me either, but this store kind of has an insatiable lust for eager consumers. Uhm, yeah, I basically just said this store craves nothing more than to satisfy the customer’s every need and desire. God, you actually still don’t get it, do you? I guess I’ll go slower so even you can understand. I’m not talking about the manager or the executives or anyone; the store itself hungers for, y’know, loyal shoppers to purchase its high-quality products.
And with deals like these, I mean, who could ever say no? It’s like: there’s no need to shop or exist anywhere else except here, now. Wait, you still don’t get it. Guess I literally have to explain everything, huh? Okay, so basically this place will nudge you — entice you — to seek out Aisle 13, where all demographically ideal consumers are born to be. Trust me, it starts as just a little, gentle hum in your mind, but soon it crescendoes into a maddening cacophony. Or something like that.
That’s probably when I, uhm, should have just quit the job and left. But I sort of liked the long, late hours. I liked feeling appreciated and special, and the store made it clear I was, y’know, such a irreplaceable asset to the stocking team. I guess I even felt, like, unconditionally loved, maybe? A nagging absence would come over me whenever I was away from this establishment and its unbelievable deals. “Like highway robbery.” That’s totally true, though. I wouldn’t dare shop anywhere else. Not anymore.
There was a certain night shift in a blur of, y’know, countless night shifts when I discovered my true calling; I needed to set an example and become a perfect consumer, someone other shoppers could admire and even envy. In doing so, I literally proved myself worthy enough to walk Aisle 13. It stood before me, like, plain as day, and I never even doubted its existence. I could only feel gratitude, because it’s just such an honor to shop there.
And, by then, it was seriously way too late for me to turn back. I couldn’t keep my eyes off the glorious items lining the shelves. Y’see, Aisle 13 provides everything the customer would ever need for their personal perfection. It lets the shopper become desirable to the products they wish to buy in the future. It’s a wonder of marketing, ‘cause it, uhm, designs people for the products instead of the other way around.
The store showed me everything I needed to be a perfect and consistent buyer. “Snarky ’n Superior” was a total must-have for my conversational flavor, and I grabbed basically anything and everything to check off my demographically desirable shopping list. Every new item made me feel even better about myself. Shopping was supposed to be an experience. It was supposed to make me feel happy and good about myself. For once, I literally felt good about what I wanted, because what I wanted was good. Or something like that.
But, uhm, consuming is totally about how you look to other consumers, so my look as an unkempt, low-wage stocking guy was…just no. I needed a makeover, and, store-to-the-rescue, I got exactly what I needed. It was so simple and easy for me to pick a new face and hair and body, to just slip them on and throw away the old undesirable aspects. Actually, this whole look came as a combined “NooYoo Skin,” only the zipper, uhm, sort of sealed up forever as soon as I put it on. Not that I care. Now, I get to look totally amazing while I look for totally amazing deals.
Oh, yeah, this outfit, these nails, everything you see here: also all available on Aisle 13. You can find everything there, including self actualization or something like that. There’s actually no reason for me to ever leave, especially since it’s open all the time. Uhm, I guess you’re still confused and, like, some of us are just more visual learners. I, for sure, get it. But I just wanted to tell you what the managers literally won’t. They never told me just how perfect this place really is.
Yeah, it’s totally not my problem, but I thought you should know what it’s like to work here, at least. It’s really funny that I have to tell an employee about the layout of the store they work at, though. I guess even a guy like you will eventually get acquainted with all the aisles. Until then, can you at least try and keep the customers satisfied?