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"Maybe eventually, I'll just carry all my crap over there or something…" Thijs sighed to himself, grabbing a few days worth of clean clothes from his dresser and stuffing them into a worn duffle bag. "It would certainly make things easier than coming back here all the time."
He had picked today of all days to be an early-riser,  fully conscious before the sun even peeked over the horizon. Respectfully (or perhaps out of fear) he waited a couple hours until at least faint shadows could be cast by morning's first light before prodding the other resident of the bed to say that he would be going home to get a few things. Which brought him to here.
He had showered, cleaned up, thrown things in the wash and now packed  what he would need for ease's sake for the next little while. And it wasn't even time for the earliest of businesses to be open yet. With a sigh, he fell onto his bed. The mattress felt so foreign now… He wasn't sure if that was entirely a good thing. How long had it been…? Perhaps almost a month, from meeting to present. In that respect, things had certainly flown by, never had he grown so attached to anyone in such a timeframe. He could spend hours contemplating the reasoning behind it, and considered doing just that but was violently interrupted.
Sitting bolt up right, Thijs clutched at his head with a groan. He suddenly felt an intense overload of negative emotions too profound to be his own. Through all his tribulations, never could anything warrant desolation of such crushing magnitude. He sunk to  the floor, fighting against the urge to pass out, trying to find the source.
Reasoning didn't take him long. There was only one person who had such an intimate connection with him-- who could affect him so severely.
But before he could just go off, he needed to relay there was an issue, or there would be more, and bigger issues when he returned.
Concentrating to keep his thoughts even and composed, he gently probed the semiconscious mind of his partner.

"I'll be a little longer than I expected. Don't worry. Rest well and I'll see you later on."
He got a jumble of indecipherable thought in return, gleaning there was no opposition. He stood and righted himself, dropping the bag and locating where he needed to go before teleporting off.

After shaking off the initial numbing tingle as his senses rematerialized, Thijs stood stock still, rattled to his core.
Never had he seen anyone quite so pained; it struck him, hard. It didn't seem possible that Nowaki could even feasibly feel all the emotions that super charged the air around the two, much less display them. Not the apathetic, aloof Lugia who always had a level head, even in the heat of battle. Certainly not the man who had been the soothing comfort for all his hysterical outbursts. This was not that Nowaki.
Stripped of any glory was the beast of the sea, slumped against the wet cavern wall, convulsing with silent sobs.  One hand was wrapped tightly around his middle perhaps in hope the grip would save him from drowning in his sorrows, the other shaky hand covered his face as if to hide it from the dark, blue glasses long discarded to Mew knows where.
Sharp, shuddering gasps of breath came irregularly, piercing the otherwise heavy silence, ringing in the psycat's ears.

"Noah, " Thijs whispered, stepping closer.
The addressed flinched, clutching at his sides with both hands and turning his face to the wall, speaking with vehemence the younger had seldom heard.

"Leave me."

It struck his head in same time like a telepathic bellow, making him hiss and wince. He wasn't about to leave. After all the shit he'd put Nowaki though, there just wasn't a chance in hell. He made his way over, keeping back just shy of arms-reach.
"Noah, please," he persisted, still in hushed, gentle tones. "Please talk to me. What's happened?"

For a while, he received no answer other than a shake of the blunette's head. Eventually, though, he looked up just enough to be able to properly speak.

"I… I found…" the Lugia swallowed hard, eking out the last, nearly inaudible word. "…that…"
A twitch of his fingers was the only direction Thijs received. The vague gesture had been towards the nearby table but upon investigation, he saw nothing out of the ordinary. It was a crusty old oyster broke half open, revealing a rather small pearl.
He frowned, looking back to his guardian. "I'm sorry, I don't understand…"

Shivering in place, Nowaki murmured, "I.. Suppose I never told you… I suppose I never told anyone. It was my dirty secret. It was my sin."

Thijs took the opportunity to lay a  hand on the other man's shoulder, when met with no resistance, he led them both to a seat, far away from the allegedly awful oyster.
Nowaki sat fairly straight, by himself, refusing contact once he was stable.
The psycat only grew more concerned and curious as time wore on, but waited patiently for when Nowaki was good and ready to explain. Outside, his face was the picture of calm, one couldn't even catch a glimpse of what he felt through his eyes. But even the weakest, most inexperienced Psychic type would know different if they caught a whiff of the atmosphere that suffocated them.

The legendary took a breath to collect himself before beginning, looking over in his guest's general direction, but focusing on nothing in particular.
"… I… Have never found a mate in life…"
The words came careful and slow.
" While we are immortal, we are not invincible… Hundreds of years ago, long before mortals had even an inkling of the technology they would have needed to create you, I was hunted… I had come into a few close calls, shall we say…"
Thijs nodded. He had heard this before. It was one of their first heart to heart talks.

With a weak chuckle, the water dragon continued.
"Yes, I have recounted this story to you, I remember well… However, I left some things out… You see, I feared the world would soon be left without a master for it's watery depths… And so when I confronted Arceus, explaining I would not have any heir or substitute, He and Mew set to work creating one."

"You mean, like a clone? Another you?"

"No, young one. A child Lugia. You see, all of us, gods included, are children at one point. We are simply very intelligent, very powerful children. We have the knowledge Arceus gives us of the world and survival and our purpose; and we grow. But we all start out as children."
Thijs recoiled from the bile building up behind his words.

"So… They created you a child.. Out of nothing?"

"No, no. It would have been enormous effort to do that, and upset the natural balance. All creatures can only be created once, the gender counter parts are modifications of the original. As I had no counter part, nor second option, they resorted to different methods. Godhood is unique, you know. It is not possible any longer to create immortal beings from thin air should the world hope to function.

"Instead, they took only a bit of blood, along with a fraction of my soul--"

"Your soul?!" Thijs blurted out, paling. "H-how is that… Y-you can't… That can't be…"

"… They took those things and fashioned an artificial child. He was real, he was technically mine, but also me… My immortality and power had two vessels," Nowaki sighed.

The  younger bit his lip, hesitating to ask, but the pregnant pause seemed to imply he should.
"What was his name?"

The Lugia shifted slightly, leaning more heavily on the back of couch and staring straight ahead.
"…Kai."
He said it with such exhaustion, it was as though the very word drained his life force.
When Thijs' only response was a downward cast glance, he forged on.

"I still acted as his father, and he treated me as such, though I suspect he knew the truth… That…" he gestured vaguely to the table once again. "… was the first thing he ever retrieved off the sea floor when I was training him in the currents and  steeling him for the depths of the deepest ocean… He gave it to me and asked if I was proud."

There was a long, strained silence afterwards. Thijs was about to probe with another question that had stuck in his throat, but was beat to the punch for an explanation.

"We… We were just out learning all the underwater paths to lakes and…. There was an awful earthquake…. The cliffs…. A-A rock slide… I couldn't…. I didn't…"
He slowly leant forward again, choking up. He was pulled into thin arms before he could be allowed to curl into a ball.

"Noah…" the psycat whimpered, holding him close.
Nowaki clung to him desperately, gripping the fabric of Thijs' shirt tight enough to rip it.

"I-I couldn't do a thing…! I was s-so focused on keeping the one area around us safe I--! I didn't see him knocked aside! I didn't even see it happen! God, no… Give him back… Take me, just give him back..!"
He all but wailed into the shoulder his face was buried in, overcome with grief and anger.

Thijs trembled, at a complete loss, failing at keeping his composure, but at least limiting it so he could be of comfort.

"It was my fault..! He died because I wasn't watching! He died because I wasn't there!" he yelled, voice hoarse and cracking.

"No, Noah, please…! It wasn't your fault.. Bad things happen, it was an accident!" Thijs whispered harshly by his ear.

"He's dead.. Part of me is dead…!"

The two remained in each others hold for what felt like an eternity, Nowaki spitting bitter, hateful things when he could be coherent, most about himself. Thijs stayed pleading and convincing him the whole time he couldn't be at fault. At least not nearly as much as he was insisting to be.

When all the tears had dried and it was safe to loosen the embrace, they sat upright, looking into their laps, but still facing one another.
"… I went to Arceus so he could repress my memories of those times… "

Thijs nodded, smiling weakly.

"I became rather good at it after a while.. Which is why I look after you in much the same fashion, " Nowaki murmured, running a gentle hand through Thijs' bangs.

"I'd thought I'd rid all that I had of Kai's existence from my life, but that apparently wasn't so.. I found the oyster dusting an old, forgotten corner of the cavern… And the wall just… shattered. Everything came flooding back.. I'm so sorry to have lost control like that. What a terrible role model I am…"

"…If anything, I'm glad to see you emote… I wondered why you were always so…"

"Emotionless…? There was a time I was a sight more animated than I am now, but I cannot handle them well any longer. It was easier this way…"

"But it has to be so painful…" Thijs sniffed, leaning in and laying his forehead on Nowaki's shoulder.
The water dragon sat him back and kissed his forehead.
"What is it about you, hm? How do you comfort so effortlessly?"
Thijs flushed slightly. Had this been a century ago, he would have about died on the spot. "Experience from being the one in your position, I guess?" he offered weakly.

"Perhaps… It's a gift, " Nowaki said, sounding finished, but added after a moment of thought, "You remind me of him. Of Kai. The light of my life."
Thijs could say nothing in return, simply putting his arms around the other man when he was pulled into a very loose embrace.
"I've been so lonely since you left, you know… They all leave someday, though, right…? Can't keep them cooped up forever… Thijs, I want you to know something. Something very important."

"What's that…?" he squeaked, nerves nearly muting him.

"That I love you dearly."
Nowaki locked their gazes as he said it, making sure he was understood. He felt confusion, panic, but then understanding emanate from the younger.

"I love you too, Noah…"
It rolled off his tongue so easily, he hadn't even noticed it.
Guilt rushed through him instantly.
He'd put up such a fight with his lover, but now, he could admit his feelings to another man just like that? A former flame none the less?
But it wasn't the same. This was different, somehow. How, he had no idea. It was different, but….
If word ever got out, this slip would cost him… It wasn't the time to worry about that now. He sat, leaning against his guardian and listening to him recount all sorts of stories that had never been told before.
He'd never felt like this.

Description
"Maybe eventually, I'll just carry all my crap over there or something…" Thijs sighed to himself, grabbing a few days worth of clean clothes from his dresser and stuffing them into a worn duffle bag. "It would certainly make things easier than coming back here all the time."
He had picked today of all days to be an early-riser,  fully conscious before the sun even peeked over the horizon. Respectfully (or perhaps out of fear) he waited a couple hours until at least faint shadows could be cast by morning's first light before prodding the other resident of the bed to say that he would be going home to get a few things. Which brought him to here.
He had showered, cleaned up, thrown things in the wash and now packed  what he would need for ease's sake for the next little while. And it wasn't even time for the earliest of businesses to be open yet. With a sigh, he fell onto his bed. The mattress felt so foreign now… He wasn't sure if that was entirely a good thing. How long had it been…? Perhaps almost a month, from meeting to present. In that respect, things had certainly flown by, never had he grown so attached to anyone in such a timeframe. He could spend hours contemplating the reasoning behind it, and considered doing just that but was violently interrupted.
Sitting bolt up right, Thijs clutched at his head with a groan. He suddenly felt an intense overload of negative emotions too profound to be his own. Through all his tribulations, never could anything warrant desolation of such crushing magnitude. He sunk to  the floor, fighting against the urge to pass out, trying to find the source.
Reasoning didn't take him long. There was only one person who had such an intimate connection with him-- who could affect him so severely.
But before he could just go off, he needed to relay there was an issue, or there would be more, and bigger issues when he returned.
Concentrating to keep his thoughts even and composed, he gently probed the semiconscious mind of his partner.

"I'll be a little longer than I expected. Don't worry. Rest well and I'll see you later on."
He got a jumble of indecipherable thought in return, gleaning there was no opposition. He stood and righted himself, dropping the bag and locating where he needed to go before teleporting off.

After shaking off the initial numbing tingle as his senses rematerialized, Thijs stood stock still, rattled to his core.
Never had he seen anyone quite so pained; it struck him, hard. It didn't seem possible that Nowaki could even feasibly feel all the emotions that super charged the air around the two, much less display them. Not the apathetic, aloof Lugia who always had a level head, even in the heat of battle. Certainly not the man who had been the soothing comfort for all his hysterical outbursts. This was not that Nowaki.
Stripped of any glory was the beast of the sea, slumped against the wet cavern wall, convulsing with silent sobs.  One hand was wrapped tightly around his middle perhaps in hope the grip would save him from drowning in his sorrows, the other shaky hand covered his face as if to hide it from the dark, blue glasses long discarded to Mew knows where.
Sharp, shuddering gasps of breath came irregularly, piercing the otherwise heavy silence, ringing in the psycat's ears.

"Noah, " Thijs whispered, stepping closer.
The addressed flinched, clutching at his sides with both hands and turning his face to the wall, speaking with vehemence the younger had seldom heard.

"Leave me."

It struck his head in same time like a telepathic bellow, making him hiss and wince. He wasn't about to leave. After all the shit he'd put Nowaki though, there just wasn't a chance in hell. He made his way over, keeping back just shy of arms-reach.
"Noah, please," he persisted, still in hushed, gentle tones. "Please talk to me. What's happened?"

For a while, he received no answer other than a shake of the blunette's head. Eventually, though, he looked up just enough to be able to properly speak.

"I… I found…" the Lugia swallowed hard, eking out the last, nearly inaudible word. "…that…"
A twitch of his fingers was the only direction Thijs received. The vague gesture had been towards the nearby table but upon investigation, he saw nothing out of the ordinary. It was a crusty old oyster broke half open, revealing a rather small pearl.
He frowned, looking back to his guardian. "I'm sorry, I don't understand…"

Shivering in place, Nowaki murmured, "I.. Suppose I never told you… I suppose I never told anyone. It was my dirty secret. It was my sin."

Thijs took the opportunity to lay a  hand on the other man's shoulder, when met with no resistance, he led them both to a seat, far away from the allegedly awful oyster.
Nowaki sat fairly straight, by himself, refusing contact once he was stable.
The psycat only grew more concerned and curious as time wore on, but waited patiently for when Nowaki was good and ready to explain. Outside, his face was the picture of calm, one couldn't even catch a glimpse of what he felt through his eyes. But even the weakest, most inexperienced Psychic type would know different if they caught a whiff of the atmosphere that suffocated them.

The legendary took a breath to collect himself before beginning, looking over in his guest's general direction, but focusing on nothing in particular.
"… I… Have never found a mate in life…"
The words came careful and slow.
" While we are immortal, we are not invincible… Hundreds of years ago, long before mortals had even an inkling of the technology they would have needed to create you, I was hunted… I had come into a few close calls, shall we say…"
Thijs nodded. He had heard this before. It was one of their first heart to heart talks.

With a weak chuckle, the water dragon continued.
"Yes, I have recounted this story to you, I remember well… However, I left some things out… You see, I feared the world would soon be left without a master for it's watery depths… And so when I confronted Arceus, explaining I would not have any heir or substitute, He and Mew set to work creating one."

"You mean, like a clone? Another you?"

"No, young one. A child Lugia. You see, all of us, gods included, are children at one point. We are simply very intelligent, very powerful children. We have the knowledge Arceus gives us of the world and survival and our purpose; and we grow. But we all start out as children."
Thijs recoiled from the bile building up behind his words.

"So… They created you a child.. Out of nothing?"

"No, no. It would have been enormous effort to do that, and upset the natural balance. All creatures can only be created once, the gender counter parts are modifications of the original. As I had no counter part, nor second option, they resorted to different methods. Godhood is unique, you know. It is not possible any longer to create immortal beings from thin air should the world hope to function.

"Instead, they took only a bit of blood, along with a fraction of my soul--"

"Your soul?!" Thijs blurted out, paling. "H-how is that… Y-you can't… That can't be…"

"… They took those things and fashioned an artificial child. He was real, he was technically mine, but also me… My immortality and power had two vessels," Nowaki sighed.

The  younger bit his lip, hesitating to ask, but the pregnant pause seemed to imply he should.
"What was his name?"

The Lugia shifted slightly, leaning more heavily on the back of couch and staring straight ahead.
"…Kai."
He said it with such exhaustion, it was as though the very word drained his life force.
When Thijs' only response was a downward cast glance, he forged on.

"I still acted as his father, and he treated me as such, though I suspect he knew the truth… That…" he gestured vaguely to the table once again. "… was the first thing he ever retrieved off the sea floor when I was training him in the currents and  steeling him for the depths of the deepest ocean… He gave it to me and asked if I was proud."

There was a long, strained silence afterwards. Thijs was about to probe with another question that had stuck in his throat, but was beat to the punch for an explanation.

"We… We were just out learning all the underwater paths to lakes and…. There was an awful earthquake…. The cliffs…. A-A rock slide… I couldn't…. I didn't…"
He slowly leant forward again, choking up. He was pulled into thin arms before he could be allowed to curl into a ball.

"Noah…" the psycat whimpered, holding him close.
Nowaki clung to him desperately, gripping the fabric of Thijs' shirt tight enough to rip it.

"I-I couldn't do a thing…! I was s-so focused on keeping the one area around us safe I--! I didn't see him knocked aside! I didn't even see it happen! God, no… Give him back… Take me, just give him back..!"
He all but wailed into the shoulder his face was buried in, overcome with grief and anger.

Thijs trembled, at a complete loss, failing at keeping his composure, but at least limiting it so he could be of comfort.

"It was my fault..! He died because I wasn't watching! He died because I wasn't there!" he yelled, voice hoarse and cracking.

"No, Noah, please…! It wasn't your fault.. Bad things happen, it was an accident!" Thijs whispered harshly by his ear.

"He's dead.. Part of me is dead…!"

The two remained in each others hold for what felt like an eternity, Nowaki spitting bitter, hateful things when he could be coherent, most about himself. Thijs stayed pleading and convincing him the whole time he couldn't be at fault. At least not nearly as much as he was insisting to be.

When all the tears had dried and it was safe to loosen the embrace, they sat upright, looking into their laps, but still facing one another.
"… I went to Arceus so he could repress my memories of those times… "

Thijs nodded, smiling weakly.

"I became rather good at it after a while.. Which is why I look after you in much the same fashion, " Nowaki murmured, running a gentle hand through Thijs' bangs.

"I'd thought I'd rid all that I had of Kai's existence from my life, but that apparently wasn't so.. I found the oyster dusting an old, forgotten corner of the cavern… And the wall just… shattered. Everything came flooding back.. I'm so sorry to have lost control like that. What a terrible role model I am…"

"…If anything, I'm glad to see you emote… I wondered why you were always so…"

"Emotionless…? There was a time I was a sight more animated than I am now, but I cannot handle them well any longer. It was easier this way…"

"But it has to be so painful…" Thijs sniffed, leaning in and laying his forehead on Nowaki's shoulder.
The water dragon sat him back and kissed his forehead.
"What is it about you, hm? How do you comfort so effortlessly?"
Thijs flushed slightly. Had this been a century ago, he would have about died on the spot. "Experience from being the one in your position, I guess?" he offered weakly.

"Perhaps… It's a gift, " Nowaki said, sounding finished, but added after a moment of thought, "You remind me of him. Of Kai. The light of my life."
Thijs could say nothing in return, simply putting his arms around the other man when he was pulled into a very loose embrace.
"I've been so lonely since you left, you know… They all leave someday, though, right…? Can't keep them cooped up forever… Thijs, I want you to know something. Something very important."

"What's that…?" he squeaked, nerves nearly muting him.

"That I love you dearly."
Nowaki locked their gazes as he said it, making sure he was understood. He felt confusion, panic, but then understanding emanate from the younger.

"I love you too, Noah…"
It rolled off his tongue so easily, he hadn't even noticed it.
Guilt rushed through him instantly.
He'd put up such a fight with his lover, but now, he could admit his feelings to another man just like that? A former flame none the less?
But it wasn't the same. This was different, somehow. How, he had no idea. It was different, but….
If word ever got out, this slip would cost him… It wasn't the time to worry about that now. He sat, leaning against his guardian and listening to him recount all sorts of stories that had never been told before.
He'd never felt like this.