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Welcome, my friends to a new show segment I call Fandom Police,   I am Monstermaster13 - your law-enforcer, your judge, your jury, and executioner all in one - kind of like Judge Dredd. Yes, I AM THE LAW....of fandom etiquette that is.   But there are some fandoms that never learn from their mistakes and those fandoms are the ones who are going to face justice today. The show works like this, with each fandom listed below you'll see a list of 'Crimes They've Commited', this category lists all of the horrible sinful crimes against fandom etiquette that each of them has commited, below that is a story or description titled a 'Fandom Police Bio File' on said fandom, explaining how they act and why they are on the list, verdict is self explanitory, punishment is the category in which the ones that are particularly bad or annoying get a punishment that fits them accordingly.     So...let's meet the inmates shall we?

1. The Russell Brand fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Worshipping a false 'Messiah', creepy overly sexual fan-girlism, just general dickheadishness.
Our first group of inmates is one we've had great difficult keeping under control because of how extreme they are in their overly creepy fan-girlishness and their dickheadishness towards other people online.    Meet today's subject,   Russell Brand.   You couldn't escape this man last year because he was everywhere.   Hey kids, it's time for the word of the day - can you guess what it is? That's right - it's Overexposed.    Can you spell overexposed? I can.   Let's all spell it together. O-V-E-R E-X-P-O-S-E-D. Well done, if you know what that word means - you are smart, unlike this fandom here. No believe it or not, they're not all creepy - but some of the more extreme examples of Russell fans out there are...it makes me think they might even stoop to pulling a Kathy Bates in Misery.    I am saying this for your own good, get professional help.   "But Russell is so sexy" I hear them croon.   Really? You think Brand is sexy? What planet are you people from? "He's so smart and charismatic" Yeah right, and i'm sure that Ed Gein was a gentleman as well. What is wrong with these people? Possibly everything.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: I sentence the Russell Brand fanbase to be locked in a room and forced to watch REAL British comedy for 24 hours straight with a Clockwork Orange style headgear on.

2.   The Twilight fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Pretty much everything they've done has lead up to them being on this list.
This lot goes without saying, being fans of the thing that single-handedly took something as cool as monsters and made them into eye-candy for teenage girls who don't know what real vampire and werecreatures are all about.   Apart from being a bunch of whiny crybabies,   they're a bunch of whiny crybabies with terrible taste.   I am sorry, but your so called precious 'vamps' are nothing more than sparkly pricks.   Luckily I was able to keep these ones under control thanks to my special 'vampire' hunting gear.   They're lucky I didn't pull out my wooden stake loaded crossbow.
Verdict: Guilty of being a bad example to fanbases everywhere.
Punishment: I sentence the Twilight fanbase to spend an entire night in a gothic castle with my vampiric alter-ego Chris the alpha Walken and spend the entirety of the night in a special 'Vampire 101' class to learn about how real vampire movies are starting with a marathon of some of the best of the best.

3. Beliebers.
Crimes they've committed: Too many to list.
Ah, boy band crazes.   I remember when they were a new thing, and now it seems that every year has a boy band or male singer craze which gets girls all crazy and other guys all ticked off.   This bunch of inmates not only has terrible taste in role models but terrible taste in music as well. If your so called 'role model' is someone responsible for being the butt of many jokes as well as doing questionable acts,   then it's time to get a new role model.    My fellow law-enforcer Officer Machete used to be an inmate here before he changed his ways and became a legendary badass hero and he is a terrific example to go by.   Ladies, Beiber is bad news and you should realize it before it is too late.   See? This is why I chose to be a Josh Peck fan. Because at least Josh is a good role model.
Verdict: Oh boy are they guilty as hell or what?
Punishment: I sentence them to learn about how real music works by listening to all the classics, then if they don't change their ways I will have them be visited by the ghosts of three famous musicians and have the ghosts show them the error of their ways.

4. Regular Show fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: General dickheadishness, hate crimes against a fictional internet persona.
Who doesn't love Regular Show? It's brilliant in a warped kind of way. There are two ways to having a fandom, the right way and the wrong way.   The right way is to be supportive of the thing you're a fan of while still respecting the opinions of others and the wrong one is to act like a completely asshole, and throw hissy fits whenever someone disagrees with you. Case in point, the Regular Show fanbase and their hate crimes which were commited against Ben T. Looney,   Ben is a fictional character created by Ben Tannehill on Youtube and there was one particular rant the character did which drove them to commit this crime - that's right, part 4 of his Cartoon Network.   And it's all because they didn't know Ben T.Looney was fictional and because the character said that he didn't like Regular Show,   it was all because Ben T.Looney said HE DIDN'T LIKE A COCKADOODY SHOW! They got upset over a COCK-A-DOODY TELEVISION SHOW!
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: They must make a series of videos apologizing to Tannehill for their hate crimes and post them on Youtube and be sincere about it,   and they mustn't use text-to-speech programs.

5. Homestuck fans.
Crimes they've comitted: Being immature brats, using poor spelling and grammar on purpose, overruse of profanity, delusions of trollism, overall assholery, and being whiny crybabies.
These inmates suffer from delusions of trollism, they are under the severe delusion that they are 'trolls' that reside in the world of Homestuck.   They often claim such bullshit as being related to a character from the webcomics, or actually claiming to actually being a member of the 'troll' race that exists solely in said webcomics. How do they do this? By using the terrible spelling and grammar that is used in the webcomics constantly on purpose, swearing, and acting like they are a character in the comics You're not fooling anyone, you moron.   If you honestly think it's a good idea to pull this shit on me just because you can, then think again...because this law-enforcer doesn't take kindly to 'trolls', not the internet kind or the Homestuck kind either. I'm sorry, but you are NOT a Homestuck troll and you will NOT ever marry Gamzee because Gamzee isn't real.   So take out those fake horns and teeth and stop trying to pull this shit off because you FAILED! Unless you are doing it ironically or are just doing it for fun via RPing, then you have no need to act like this AT ALL.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: I sentence them to attend spelling and grammar classes as well as lessons on internet etiquette, then after that - have their mouths washed with soap to fix their potty mouth.   Plus, several hours of watching nothing but Troll and Troll 2 back to back.

6. Team Coco.
Crimes they've committed: Holding a grudge against a beloved comedian/former Tonight Show host, hate crimes against said comedian, just generally not being very good at being fans.
Ah yes, I remember the Leno/CoCo debacle like it was yesterday. And yet this is STILL being brought up even long after Leno left, Leno the show as host last year in February and yet these people are still having hissy fits over the aforementioned debacle. It's not difficult to imagine what it's like having to deal with people like this.   It's like when you have an annoying sibling who does nothing but blame you for everything that goes wrong even if you didn't do anything wrong.   "But dad....Steve broke the vase, it wasn't me!" "MOOOOM! Steve promised he'd let me play on the XBOX360 with him this afternoon, it's now 4pm and Steve has broken his promise!" "STEVE TOOK MY ACTION FIGURE COLLECTION AGAIN AND BURIED IT IN THE YARD!",   imagine that only it's with a Conan fan and they're saying "But Jay Leno did do it! He was responsible for this whole mess!" "Leno did it!" "Leno's a backstabber, a liar and a traitor and he deserves to burn in hell!".    This is how NOT to support someone you are a fan of, bashing someone else who is more well known but equally as good as that person.   To them, Conan is god - and Leno is the spawn of Satan. They'll most likely side with Conan on everything and they'll most likely to react to Leno like this: *in the voice of Kevin McDonald as Waffle from Catscratch* "THAT MAN IS EVIL! EEEEEVIL! BACKSTABBER! SHOW-TAKER-BACKER!" Although some of them have softened up by now, some continue this annoying trend of bad behavior even today.   Leave Jay alone.   What happened between him and Conan was neither of their faults, it was the network and tv networks - much like human beings, make mistakes.   Please put all this behind you and grow up, please!
Verdict: Guilty as all hell.
Punishment: It seems that for the more stubborn ones - a seminar by one Miss Elsa is in order. As Miss Elsa is an expert in the field of helping others putting the past behind them, and as someone who is skilled in the art of 'letting things go', maybe she'll be able to sort them out and get them to 'let it go'.   For those ones who still think Leno is to blame for the whole mess,   they must send a sincere apology letter to Leno and tell him on Twitter that they are sorry for how they treated him.

7. The 'Little Monsters'
Crimes they've committed: Numerous crimes against fashion, being genuinely annoying, pulling the 'ripoff/copycat' excuse when posting about other singers.
They say imitation is often the sincerest form of flattery, that is unless you're one of Mother Gaga's 'Little Monsters'. To these particular inmates here, any female singer that dresses up in flashy costumes and puts on a show is immediately dubbed a Gaga rip-off/copycat by them.   Look, Gaga is a good singer - i'll give her that, but there are other singers who have dressed up in costumes and put on a show for their fans too.   Like for example Katy Perry, Madonna, Cher, Cyndi Lauper, Diana Ross, The Spice Girls, and the mother of them all - Grace Jones, there are even male singers/bands that do this - like Elvis, Alice Cooper, Meatloaf, KISS, the late Michael Jackson and Freddy Mercury and of course the father of all glam rock David Bowie.   Even Weird Al does it in both his music videos and on concert.    Just because they dress in fantastical costumes and put on a fantastic show for their fans doesn't make them in anyway a Lady Gaga copycat/knock-off.    In fact a LOT of these people have come before Gaga..well except Katy Perry that is.   Hey, don't get mad at the people who dislike your precious Mama Gaga Monster just because she's weird, it's not their fault - she just performs that way.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: My good friend Mr Yankovic or 'Weird Al' as he likes to be referred to - recommends that these particular inmates should listen to his song 'Perform This Way' to learn how to develop a sense of humor about this sort of thing before continuing any further with this study of their behavior. If they don't learn to accept that they have a problem, they should seek guidance from Mr Yankovic on a regular basis.

8. Jo-Bro fans.
Crimes they've committed: See the entry for Beliebers.
Remember this trio of miscreants? I sure as hell do. Oh, poor Disney Channel - what has become of you? You've become nothing but a toxic waste dump for teen bop garbage such as countless crappy sitcoms, countless crappy original movies, teen stars who end up going bad after they leave,   and trying to force their would-be-singers down our throats.   And before you use the ol "But they're popular and kids really love them!" excuse,   let me tell you that just because something is 'popular' doesn't mean it's good, and before you use..."Oh, but you're not the target age for Disney Channel anymore!" excuse, let me tell you that I KNOW several things about how the business and show-business industry work as a whole.   It seems to me that all the executives at Disney Channel or the ones running it only seem to care about pleasing easily impressed children or making money, hence why HSM and Hannah Montana are considered to be 'franchises'.   It is like they think children are idiots.   Kids are smarter than you think, you know.   They most likely do NOT care for your crappy live-action shows as most of them are probably OL, listening to music or playing video games.   Jonas Brothers fans, listen up - you are failing at what you're supposed to be doing.   I mean you lot are being a bunch of whiny crybabies.   You lot practically had a hissy fit when Russell Brand ranted about the Jo-Bros and their 'no sex' policy at the VMAS! And that time is one of the only two times in which i've agreed with Russell on anything - well that and his Twilight rant that got banned from the VMAs because of the joke about a woman's period.   You people should be ashamed.
Verdict: Extremely guilty.
Punishment: Intensive music therapy and intensive care in my musical treatment therapy for several weeks, if it works then we will give them a chance to redeem themselves. It it doesn't, we will send them to our musical conditioning/behavioral modification room to live in there for the remainder of the week. Of course we could always just let my evil arch nemesis the one and only Russell Brand have his way with them, but we feel that would be too extreme and would require an X-Rating.

9. Creepypasta Fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Acts of hybristophilia, sexualizing characters who are supposed to be creepy, just genuinely being creepy and morbid in general.
We all know what a creepypasta is, right? It's like an urban legend or a scary story - only you tell it online instead of a campfire or to other people.   Who doesn't love a creepypasta, am I right?   While a lot of them tend to be cliche in particular those 'Lost Episodes' ones and ones that are supposed to be 'theories' about a certain show or movie, they are genuinely entertaining in some aspects - but to these inmates here.....it is taken to an incredibly disturbing new level.   I warn you now, these particular inmates have a thing for psychopaths and serial killers and have a fetish for all things gory and sadistic. Looks like it's time for another word of the day! Let's see what the word is this time....it's....hybristophilia! Do you know what that word means? That word refers to a particular paraphillia that some particularly disgusting people have for people who do horrendous crimes like murder or rape or are serial killers or murderers, yes - not just fictional serial killers but real ones as well.   These particular inmates take characters that are supposed to be creepy like Jeff the Killer and make them into Cutesy Wutesy Eye-candy and do Yaoi/yuri fanfiction about them.   Jeff the Killer, Smile Dog, Slenderman, etc are NOT supposed to be cute - they're supposed to be scary.   It's called creepypasta - it's NOT called CutesyPasta, or Eye-Candypasta, or SexyPasta, it's called CREEPYPASTA! There is nothing sexy about someone who murders people because they're insane, or a faceless abomination with long arms.    I should know, i've dealt with someone who did a romantic fanfic about their obvious Mary Sue becoming the girlfriend of the villain from the Human Centipede 1 and 2.   I'm not kidding, that fanfic exists.
Almost of if not all 'original' creepypastas tend to rehash plots and elements from other ones as well as the cliches to go with it and those cliches go in spades:
- Use of the word hyperrealistic. (They use this for Lost episodes even if the show is in live action.)
- The episode starts off like any normal episode only everything is all distorted. (Another common lost episode cliche.)
- Characters in said episode acting out of character and killing other characters. (Usually happens near the end of said 'lost episode')
- 'You're Next'. (That's where it goes into 'The Ring' territory.)
- Narrator is a fan of the show or worked at the studio that makes said show.
- Said narrator knows of the Lost Episode despite the fact it's lost.
- Said narrator somehow finds it. (Yeah...where exactly does he/she find those lost episodes anyway? Aren't they suppose to be lost?)
- Characters look disheveled or creepy looking on the cover or in the episode itself. (Parodied by Dave The Useless.)
- If a theory based on a cartoon show, main character is either dead or in a coma. (Just how many of these have happened exactly? A LOT!)
- Or in purgatory. (See the Courage The Cowardly Dog and Ed, Edd N Eddy theories).
- Characters have weird looking eyes. (Either soulless black ones, red eyes with no pupils or slightly slitted, see the 'We Are The Lizards' line from the Seinfeld lost episode creepypasta.)
- If a theory based on any show at all, character either imagined the other characters or has serious mental issues. (See Rugrats theory.)
- Gratuitous amounts of gore and blood, even if it's a lost episode of a kids show.
- Whole story is told from the narrator's point of view as he/she claims to have actually been there during the events leading up to the lost episode.
- Narrator actually most likely ends up dead at the end. (Parodied by Dave The Useless as well.)
- Or the narrator actually IS dead and the whole story happened before their death. ( *whispers* I see dead narrators.)
- Outdated technology. (Most if not all the supposed lost episodes are on a VHS tape, which completely dates it by years. Parodied by Dave The Useless.)
Verdict: There's no denying it, they totally belong here - so yes, they are guilty on all accounts.
Punishment: Because of how dangerous these inmates tend to be, I have enlisted fellow creepypasta enthusiast and her own special expert-insider agent Worm Jeff and put them in a special containment chamber along with these inmates - we'll let Jeff take over from this point as part of the program.   For those particular persistent ones,   my good friend insists that a visit from a Mr Dexter Morgan is in order.

10. HSM Fans.
Crimes they've committed: Pretty much the exact same crimes as the fans of Jonas Brothers or Miley Cyrus.
I'll repeat what I said in my overview of the Jonas Bros Fanbase....oh, poor Disney Channel - what has become of you? You've become nothing but a toxic waste dump for teen bop garbage such as countless crappy sitcoms, countless crappy original movies, teen stars who end up going bad after they leave,   and trying to force their would-be-singers down our throats.   And before you use the ol "But they're popular and kids really love them!" excuse,   let me tell you that just because something is 'popular' doesn't mean it's good, and before you use..."Oh, but you're not the target age for Disney Channel anymore!" excuse, let me tell you that I KNOW several things about how the business and show-business industry work as a whole.   It seems to me that all the executives at Disney Channel or the ones running it only seem to care about pleasing easily impressed children or making money. Hench why the steaming pile of crap known as High School Musical became a 'franchise'. For those not in the know, HSM is just your basic Grease knock-off. How I do know this? Because even in interviews they admitted it, saying it was going to be their 'Grease 3'. Your only saving graces are Phineas and Ferb, the new Mickey Mouse shorts, and Gravity Falls.    And it all started with this crap. Kenny Ortega, what happened to you? You made Newsies and Hocus Pocus and then you somehow got talked into making this mess.   WHYYYY? Did you lose a bet or something? Does Disney Channel own your soul? WHHHY OH GOD WHY?   My friend Mr Werebelushi In Shades has already gone over in detail how awful the fanbase for this particular 'franchise' is in his rant about soccermoms and the case of the teenage uberbrat with anger issues and his particular soccermom encounter - I suggest reading his soccermom rant for more information (both parts of it, please).   Take my word for it, these inmates are pretty unstable.   In fact, no mere prison could hold them - so we put them inside one of our 'Danger: Subject Is Mentally Unstable/Rabid' cell units. These cell units for subjects who are either completely mentally unstable aka completely fucking insane, have attitude problems, are demented beyond all reason - or if let out could have the risk of harming others out of anger or due to darker and more sinister reasons. It is advised that all visitors please steer clear of this particular section. We don't want the visitors to get slaughtered now do we? Of course we don't.
Verdict: Oh, you better believe the HSM fans are guilty as sin. They were guilty even before they stepped foot in this place. As for Mr Ortega, he did redeem himself by working on This Is It with the late Michael Jackson - but for starting this entire HSM mess to begin with, he is still guilty of these crimes against good taste. If Disney's Descendants turns out to be good, decent or somewhat entertaining when it airs on tv this year - we shall forgive him for said crimes and change the verdict to Innocent but Misguided, but if it turns out to be completely awful or turns out to be HSM: Disney Villains Edition - then the verdict shall stay as Guilty and he shall be added to the wall of 'Most Unwanted' on the Fandom Police gallery of Repeat Offenders.
Punishment: My punishment for the HSM fandom is a marathon of musical movies that are actually good and actually ARE musicals, as for Ortega - the jury is out on him. If Disney's Descendants turns out to be good, decent or somewhat entertaining when it airs on tv this year - we shall let him go free and let him learn his lesson,   but if it turns out to be awful, terrible or HSM: Disney Villains edition - he shall have his photo taken and added to the 'Most Unwanted' gallery of Fandom Police repeat offenders,   in the meantime we have instructed that he stay in the media conditioning room with the HSM fanbase.   Hopefully dealing with the overly rabid fans of his own creations will do him some good.

Dishonorable mentions:
- Illuminati/conspiracy theorists.
Crimes committed: Acts of paranoia, delusional behavior in general, obnoxious Youtube comments, irrational behavior towards other people.
I'm going to say this once and only once - the Illuminati isn't real, it is made up.   For god's sake, it's not even that consistent. How can you claim this so called organization exists when all entries about it lack in consistency? Shame on all of you!
Verdict: Absolutely fucking guilty, no questions asked - no ifs, ands or buts.
Punishment: I have sent them into the educational part of the conditioning room and my sentence for all of them is for them to attend the world's longest and most boring history lesson with no breaks.   We're also considering sending them to 's gargoyle friend Staten for special bootcamp style training later on if they persist.

- David Icke fans.
Crimes committed: See above.
Those so called reptilians aren't real either,   they're just glitchy videos that someone on Youtube with poor video-making skills posted on his/her channel because he/she has way too much time on their hands and has seen way too many episodes of the sci fi tv series known as 'V'. And before you ask, no...'frog people' don't exist either. You just made that up.   You are all a bunch of delusional assholes.
Verdict: It doesn't take a supergenius to tell you that these inmates belong here for life, they've been pretty much making it their whole ambition to get into this place. Luckily, I knew exactly where I would put them and the Illuminati bunch over there - in the 'Nutcase Ward' which is only 5 paces away from the entrance of the 'Danger: Subject Is Mentally Unstable/Rabid' cell units. Sorry, reptile-heads, but you're guilty as all sin and you're insane to boot.
Punishment: We have enlisted them for a special space program called Project A.L.I.E.N, where they are sent up into space to relive the James Cameron movie 'Alien' with Miss Sigourney Weaver serving as the program's official instructor/guide. If they actually make it out alive and have learned their lesson, we'll let them explore the space station.   Of course well..if they don't make it out alive...well let's just say it could get pretty messy and the Fandom Police department cannot be held responsible for incidents involving xenomorphs.    Oh, and if some of them still refuse to learn their lesson - we'll have them take care of a Baby Xenomorph for several months...guess how the Baby Xenomorph will be obtained....well...let's just say one of our inmates may suffer from a little bit of 'chest pains'.

I'm Officer Monstermaster13 and this has been Fandom Police, remember my dear friends - like regular crime, fandom based crime doesn't pay and when it does -   there might be a high price placed on your head. It doesn't pay to be a terrible fandom member or supporter. Luckily the fans of this show don't have anything to worry about because they are all good-eggs and will be rewarded for their hardwork.    Keep on reporting those bad fandom members out there, keep up the good work. If you see someone OL being attacked by an example of a bad fanbase member acting out of line call this number: 0809045-543-I-JUST-SAW-SOMEONE-ONLINE-GETTING-ATTACKED-BY-A-BAD-FANDOM-MEMBER-SO-I-AM-CALLING-THIS-NUMBER-TO-REPORT-THE-INCIDENT-I-JUST-SAW.

All images their original owners.
All fandoms themselves.
Fandom Police © Me.

Original meme:
missmusic93.deviantart.com/art…

Description
Welcome, my friends to a new show segment I call Fandom Police,   I am Monstermaster13 - your law-enforcer, your judge, your jury, and executioner all in one - kind of like Judge Dredd. Yes, I AM THE LAW....of fandom etiquette that is.   But there are some fandoms that never learn from their mistakes and those fandoms are the ones who are going to face justice today. The show works like this, with each fandom listed below you'll see a list of 'Crimes They've Commited', this category lists all of the horrible sinful crimes against fandom etiquette that each of them has commited, below that is a story or description titled a 'Fandom Police Bio File' on said fandom, explaining how they act and why they are on the list, verdict is self explanitory, punishment is the category in which the ones that are particularly bad or annoying get a punishment that fits them accordingly.     So...let's meet the inmates shall we?

1. The Russell Brand fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Worshipping a false 'Messiah', creepy overly sexual fan-girlism, just general dickheadishness.
Our first group of inmates is one we've had great difficult keeping under control because of how extreme they are in their overly creepy fan-girlishness and their dickheadishness towards other people online.    Meet today's subject,   Russell Brand.   You couldn't escape this man last year because he was everywhere.   Hey kids, it's time for the word of the day - can you guess what it is? That's right - it's Overexposed.    Can you spell overexposed? I can.   Let's all spell it together. O-V-E-R E-X-P-O-S-E-D. Well done, if you know what that word means - you are smart, unlike this fandom here. No believe it or not, they're not all creepy - but some of the more extreme examples of Russell fans out there are...it makes me think they might even stoop to pulling a Kathy Bates in Misery.    I am saying this for your own good, get professional help.   "But Russell is so sexy" I hear them croon.   Really? You think Brand is sexy? What planet are you people from? "He's so smart and charismatic" Yeah right, and i'm sure that Ed Gein was a gentleman as well. What is wrong with these people? Possibly everything.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: I sentence the Russell Brand fanbase to be locked in a room and forced to watch REAL British comedy for 24 hours straight with a Clockwork Orange style headgear on.

2.   The Twilight fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Pretty much everything they've done has lead up to them being on this list.
This lot goes without saying, being fans of the thing that single-handedly took something as cool as monsters and made them into eye-candy for teenage girls who don't know what real vampire and werecreatures are all about.   Apart from being a bunch of whiny crybabies,   they're a bunch of whiny crybabies with terrible taste.   I am sorry, but your so called precious 'vamps' are nothing more than sparkly pricks.   Luckily I was able to keep these ones under control thanks to my special 'vampire' hunting gear.   They're lucky I didn't pull out my wooden stake loaded crossbow.
Verdict: Guilty of being a bad example to fanbases everywhere.
Punishment: I sentence the Twilight fanbase to spend an entire night in a gothic castle with my vampiric alter-ego Chris the alpha Walken and spend the entirety of the night in a special 'Vampire 101' class to learn about how real vampire movies are starting with a marathon of some of the best of the best.

3. Beliebers.
Crimes they've committed: Too many to list.
Ah, boy band crazes.   I remember when they were a new thing, and now it seems that every year has a boy band or male singer craze which gets girls all crazy and other guys all ticked off.   This bunch of inmates not only has terrible taste in role models but terrible taste in music as well. If your so called 'role model' is someone responsible for being the butt of many jokes as well as doing questionable acts,   then it's time to get a new role model.    My fellow law-enforcer Officer Machete used to be an inmate here before he changed his ways and became a legendary badass hero and he is a terrific example to go by.   Ladies, Beiber is bad news and you should realize it before it is too late.   See? This is why I chose to be a Josh Peck fan. Because at least Josh is a good role model.
Verdict: Oh boy are they guilty as hell or what?
Punishment: I sentence them to learn about how real music works by listening to all the classics, then if they don't change their ways I will have them be visited by the ghosts of three famous musicians and have the ghosts show them the error of their ways.

4. Regular Show fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: General dickheadishness, hate crimes against a fictional internet persona.
Who doesn't love Regular Show? It's brilliant in a warped kind of way. There are two ways to having a fandom, the right way and the wrong way.   The right way is to be supportive of the thing you're a fan of while still respecting the opinions of others and the wrong one is to act like a completely asshole, and throw hissy fits whenever someone disagrees with you. Case in point, the Regular Show fanbase and their hate crimes which were commited against Ben T. Looney,   Ben is a fictional character created by Ben Tannehill on Youtube and there was one particular rant the character did which drove them to commit this crime - that's right, part 4 of his Cartoon Network.   And it's all because they didn't know Ben T.Looney was fictional and because the character said that he didn't like Regular Show,   it was all because Ben T.Looney said HE DIDN'T LIKE A COCKADOODY SHOW! They got upset over a COCK-A-DOODY TELEVISION SHOW!
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: They must make a series of videos apologizing to Tannehill for their hate crimes and post them on Youtube and be sincere about it,   and they mustn't use text-to-speech programs.

5. Homestuck fans.
Crimes they've comitted: Being immature brats, using poor spelling and grammar on purpose, overruse of profanity, delusions of trollism, overall assholery, and being whiny crybabies.
These inmates suffer from delusions of trollism, they are under the severe delusion that they are 'trolls' that reside in the world of Homestuck.   They often claim such bullshit as being related to a character from the webcomics, or actually claiming to actually being a member of the 'troll' race that exists solely in said webcomics. How do they do this? By using the terrible spelling and grammar that is used in the webcomics constantly on purpose, swearing, and acting like they are a character in the comics You're not fooling anyone, you moron.   If you honestly think it's a good idea to pull this shit on me just because you can, then think again...because this law-enforcer doesn't take kindly to 'trolls', not the internet kind or the Homestuck kind either. I'm sorry, but you are NOT a Homestuck troll and you will NOT ever marry Gamzee because Gamzee isn't real.   So take out those fake horns and teeth and stop trying to pull this shit off because you FAILED! Unless you are doing it ironically or are just doing it for fun via RPing, then you have no need to act like this AT ALL.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: I sentence them to attend spelling and grammar classes as well as lessons on internet etiquette, then after that - have their mouths washed with soap to fix their potty mouth.   Plus, several hours of watching nothing but Troll and Troll 2 back to back.

6. Team Coco.
Crimes they've committed: Holding a grudge against a beloved comedian/former Tonight Show host, hate crimes against said comedian, just generally not being very good at being fans.
Ah yes, I remember the Leno/CoCo debacle like it was yesterday. And yet this is STILL being brought up even long after Leno left, Leno the show as host last year in February and yet these people are still having hissy fits over the aforementioned debacle. It's not difficult to imagine what it's like having to deal with people like this.   It's like when you have an annoying sibling who does nothing but blame you for everything that goes wrong even if you didn't do anything wrong.   "But dad....Steve broke the vase, it wasn't me!" "MOOOOM! Steve promised he'd let me play on the XBOX360 with him this afternoon, it's now 4pm and Steve has broken his promise!" "STEVE TOOK MY ACTION FIGURE COLLECTION AGAIN AND BURIED IT IN THE YARD!",   imagine that only it's with a Conan fan and they're saying "But Jay Leno did do it! He was responsible for this whole mess!" "Leno did it!" "Leno's a backstabber, a liar and a traitor and he deserves to burn in hell!".    This is how NOT to support someone you are a fan of, bashing someone else who is more well known but equally as good as that person.   To them, Conan is god - and Leno is the spawn of Satan. They'll most likely side with Conan on everything and they'll most likely to react to Leno like this: *in the voice of Kevin McDonald as Waffle from Catscratch* "THAT MAN IS EVIL! EEEEEVIL! BACKSTABBER! SHOW-TAKER-BACKER!" Although some of them have softened up by now, some continue this annoying trend of bad behavior even today.   Leave Jay alone.   What happened between him and Conan was neither of their faults, it was the network and tv networks - much like human beings, make mistakes.   Please put all this behind you and grow up, please!
Verdict: Guilty as all hell.
Punishment: It seems that for the more stubborn ones - a seminar by one Miss Elsa is in order. As Miss Elsa is an expert in the field of helping others putting the past behind them, and as someone who is skilled in the art of 'letting things go', maybe she'll be able to sort them out and get them to 'let it go'.   For those ones who still think Leno is to blame for the whole mess,   they must send a sincere apology letter to Leno and tell him on Twitter that they are sorry for how they treated him.

7. The 'Little Monsters'
Crimes they've committed: Numerous crimes against fashion, being genuinely annoying, pulling the 'ripoff/copycat' excuse when posting about other singers.
They say imitation is often the sincerest form of flattery, that is unless you're one of Mother Gaga's 'Little Monsters'. To these particular inmates here, any female singer that dresses up in flashy costumes and puts on a show is immediately dubbed a Gaga rip-off/copycat by them.   Look, Gaga is a good singer - i'll give her that, but there are other singers who have dressed up in costumes and put on a show for their fans too.   Like for example Katy Perry, Madonna, Cher, Cyndi Lauper, Diana Ross, The Spice Girls, and the mother of them all - Grace Jones, there are even male singers/bands that do this - like Elvis, Alice Cooper, Meatloaf, KISS, the late Michael Jackson and Freddy Mercury and of course the father of all glam rock David Bowie.   Even Weird Al does it in both his music videos and on concert.    Just because they dress in fantastical costumes and put on a fantastic show for their fans doesn't make them in anyway a Lady Gaga copycat/knock-off.    In fact a LOT of these people have come before Gaga..well except Katy Perry that is.   Hey, don't get mad at the people who dislike your precious Mama Gaga Monster just because she's weird, it's not their fault - she just performs that way.
Verdict: Guilty.
Punishment: My good friend Mr Yankovic or 'Weird Al' as he likes to be referred to - recommends that these particular inmates should listen to his song 'Perform This Way' to learn how to develop a sense of humor about this sort of thing before continuing any further with this study of their behavior. If they don't learn to accept that they have a problem, they should seek guidance from Mr Yankovic on a regular basis.

8. Jo-Bro fans.
Crimes they've committed: See the entry for Beliebers.
Remember this trio of miscreants? I sure as hell do. Oh, poor Disney Channel - what has become of you? You've become nothing but a toxic waste dump for teen bop garbage such as countless crappy sitcoms, countless crappy original movies, teen stars who end up going bad after they leave,   and trying to force their would-be-singers down our throats.   And before you use the ol "But they're popular and kids really love them!" excuse,   let me tell you that just because something is 'popular' doesn't mean it's good, and before you use..."Oh, but you're not the target age for Disney Channel anymore!" excuse, let me tell you that I KNOW several things about how the business and show-business industry work as a whole.   It seems to me that all the executives at Disney Channel or the ones running it only seem to care about pleasing easily impressed children or making money, hence why HSM and Hannah Montana are considered to be 'franchises'.   It is like they think children are idiots.   Kids are smarter than you think, you know.   They most likely do NOT care for your crappy live-action shows as most of them are probably OL, listening to music or playing video games.   Jonas Brothers fans, listen up - you are failing at what you're supposed to be doing.   I mean you lot are being a bunch of whiny crybabies.   You lot practically had a hissy fit when Russell Brand ranted about the Jo-Bros and their 'no sex' policy at the VMAS! And that time is one of the only two times in which i've agreed with Russell on anything - well that and his Twilight rant that got banned from the VMAs because of the joke about a woman's period.   You people should be ashamed.
Verdict: Extremely guilty.
Punishment: Intensive music therapy and intensive care in my musical treatment therapy for several weeks, if it works then we will give them a chance to redeem themselves. It it doesn't, we will send them to our musical conditioning/behavioral modification room to live in there for the remainder of the week. Of course we could always just let my evil arch nemesis the one and only Russell Brand have his way with them, but we feel that would be too extreme and would require an X-Rating.

9. Creepypasta Fanbase.
Crimes they've committed: Acts of hybristophilia, sexualizing characters who are supposed to be creepy, just genuinely being creepy and morbid in general.
We all know what a creepypasta is, right? It's like an urban legend or a scary story - only you tell it online instead of a campfire or to other people.   Who doesn't love a creepypasta, am I right?   While a lot of them tend to be cliche in particular those 'Lost Episodes' ones and ones that are supposed to be 'theories' about a certain show or movie, they are genuinely entertaining in some aspects - but to these inmates here.....it is taken to an incredibly disturbing new level.   I warn you now, these particular inmates have a thing for psychopaths and serial killers and have a fetish for all things gory and sadistic. Looks like it's time for another word of the day! Let's see what the word is this time....it's....hybristophilia! Do you know what that word means? That word refers to a particular paraphillia that some particularly disgusting people have for people who do horrendous crimes like murder or rape or are serial killers or murderers, yes - not just fictional serial killers but real ones as well.   These particular inmates take characters that are supposed to be creepy like Jeff the Killer and make them into Cutesy Wutesy Eye-candy and do Yaoi/yuri fanfiction about them.   Jeff the Killer, Smile Dog, Slenderman, etc are NOT supposed to be cute - they're supposed to be scary.   It's called creepypasta - it's NOT called CutesyPasta, or Eye-Candypasta, or SexyPasta, it's called CREEPYPASTA! There is nothing sexy about someone who murders people because they're insane, or a faceless abomination with long arms.    I should know, i've dealt with someone who did a romantic fanfic about their obvious Mary Sue becoming the girlfriend of the villain from the Human Centipede 1 and 2.   I'm not kidding, that fanfic exists.
Almost of if not all 'original' creepypastas tend to rehash plots and elements from other ones as well as the cliches to go with it and those cliches go in spades:
- Use of the word hyperrealistic. (They use this for Lost episodes even if the show is in live action.)
- The episode starts off like any normal episode only everything is all distorted. (Another common lost episode cliche.)
- Characters in said episode acting out of character and killing other characters. (Usually happens near the end of said 'lost episode')
- 'You're Next'. (That's where it goes into 'The Ring' territory.)
- Narrator is a fan of the show or worked at the studio that makes said show.
- Said narrator knows of the Lost Episode despite the fact it's lost.
- Said narrator somehow finds it. (Yeah...where exactly does he/she find those lost episodes anyway? Aren't they suppose to be lost?)
- Characters look disheveled or creepy looking on the cover or in the episode itself. (Parodied by Dave The Useless.)
- If a theory based on a cartoon show, main character is either dead or in a coma. (Just how many of these have happened exactly? A LOT!)
- Or in purgatory. (See the Courage The Cowardly Dog and Ed, Edd N Eddy theories).
- Characters have weird looking eyes. (Either soulless black ones, red eyes with no pupils or slightly slitted, see the 'We Are The Lizards' line from the Seinfeld lost episode creepypasta.)
- If a theory based on any show at all, character either imagined the other characters or has serious mental issues. (See Rugrats theory.)
- Gratuitous amounts of gore and blood, even if it's a lost episode of a kids show.
- Whole story is told from the narrator's point of view as he/she claims to have actually been there during the events leading up to the lost episode.
- Narrator actually most likely ends up dead at the end. (Parodied by Dave The Useless as well.)
- Or the narrator actually IS dead and the whole story happened before their death. ( *whispers* I see dead narrators.)
- Outdated technology. (Most if not all the supposed lost episodes are on a VHS tape, which completely dates it by years. Parodied by Dave The Useless.)
Verdict: There's no denying it, they totally belong here - so yes, they are guilty on all accounts.
Punishment: Because of how dangerous these inmates tend to be, I have enlisted fellow creepypasta enthusiast and her own special expert-insider agent Worm Jeff and put them in a special containment chamber along with these inmates - we'll let Jeff take over from this point as part of the program.   For those particular persistent ones,   my good friend insists that a visit from a Mr Dexter Morgan is in order.

10. HSM Fans.
Crimes they've committed: Pretty much the exact same crimes as the fans of Jonas Brothers or Miley Cyrus.
I'll repeat what I said in my overview of the Jonas Bros Fanbase....oh, poor Disney Channel - what has become of you? You've become nothing but a toxic waste dump for teen bop garbage such as countless crappy sitcoms, countless crappy original movies, teen stars who end up going bad after they leave,   and trying to force their would-be-singers down our throats.   And before you use the ol "But they're popular and kids really love them!" excuse,   let me tell you that just because something is 'popular' doesn't mean it's good, and before you use..."Oh, but you're not the target age for Disney Channel anymore!" excuse, let me tell you that I KNOW several things about how the business and show-business industry work as a whole.   It seems to me that all the executives at Disney Channel or the ones running it only seem to care about pleasing easily impressed children or making money. Hench why the steaming pile of crap known as High School Musical became a 'franchise'. For those not in the know, HSM is just your basic Grease knock-off. How I do know this? Because even in interviews they admitted it, saying it was going to be their 'Grease 3'. Your only saving graces are Phineas and Ferb, the new Mickey Mouse shorts, and Gravity Falls.    And it all started with this crap. Kenny Ortega, what happened to you? You made Newsies and Hocus Pocus and then you somehow got talked into making this mess.   WHYYYY? Did you lose a bet or something? Does Disney Channel own your soul? WHHHY OH GOD WHY?   My friend Mr Werebelushi In Shades has already gone over in detail how awful the fanbase for this particular 'franchise' is in his rant about soccermoms and the case of the teenage uberbrat with anger issues and his particular soccermom encounter - I suggest reading his soccermom rant for more information (both parts of it, please).   Take my word for it, these inmates are pretty unstable.   In fact, no mere prison could hold them - so we put them inside one of our 'Danger: Subject Is Mentally Unstable/Rabid' cell units. These cell units for subjects who are either completely mentally unstable aka completely fucking insane, have attitude problems, are demented beyond all reason - or if let out could have the risk of harming others out of anger or due to darker and more sinister reasons. It is advised that all visitors please steer clear of this particular section. We don't want the visitors to get slaughtered now do we? Of course we don't.
Verdict: Oh, you better believe the HSM fans are guilty as sin. They were guilty even before they stepped foot in this place. As for Mr Ortega, he did redeem himself by working on This Is It with the late Michael Jackson - but for starting this entire HSM mess to begin with, he is still guilty of these crimes against good taste. If Disney's Descendants turns out to be good, decent or somewhat entertaining when it airs on tv this year - we shall forgive him for said crimes and change the verdict to Innocent but Misguided, but if it turns out to be completely awful or turns out to be HSM: Disney Villains Edition - then the verdict shall stay as Guilty and he shall be added to the wall of 'Most Unwanted' on the Fandom Police gallery of Repeat Offenders.
Punishment: My punishment for the HSM fandom is a marathon of musical movies that are actually good and actually ARE musicals, as for Ortega - the jury is out on him. If Disney's Descendants turns out to be good, decent or somewhat entertaining when it airs on tv this year - we shall let him go free and let him learn his lesson,   but if it turns out to be awful, terrible or HSM: Disney Villains edition - he shall have his photo taken and added to the 'Most Unwanted' gallery of Fandom Police repeat offenders,   in the meantime we have instructed that he stay in the media conditioning room with the HSM fanbase.   Hopefully dealing with the overly rabid fans of his own creations will do him some good.

Dishonorable mentions:
- Illuminati/conspiracy theorists.
Crimes committed: Acts of paranoia, delusional behavior in general, obnoxious Youtube comments, irrational behavior towards other people.
I'm going to say this once and only once - the Illuminati isn't real, it is made up.   For god's sake, it's not even that consistent. How can you claim this so called organization exists when all entries about it lack in consistency? Shame on all of you!
Verdict: Absolutely fucking guilty, no questions asked - no ifs, ands or buts.
Punishment: I have sent them into the educational part of the conditioning room and my sentence for all of them is for them to attend the world's longest and most boring history lesson with no breaks.   We're also considering sending them to 's gargoyle friend Staten for special bootcamp style training later on if they persist.

- David Icke fans.
Crimes committed: See above.
Those so called reptilians aren't real either,   they're just glitchy videos that someone on Youtube with poor video-making skills posted on his/her channel because he/she has way too much time on their hands and has seen way too many episodes of the sci fi tv series known as 'V'. And before you ask, no...'frog people' don't exist either. You just made that up.   You are all a bunch of delusional assholes.
Verdict: It doesn't take a supergenius to tell you that these inmates belong here for life, they've been pretty much making it their whole ambition to get into this place. Luckily, I knew exactly where I would put them and the Illuminati bunch over there - in the 'Nutcase Ward' which is only 5 paces away from the entrance of the 'Danger: Subject Is Mentally Unstable/Rabid' cell units. Sorry, reptile-heads, but you're guilty as all sin and you're insane to boot.
Punishment: We have enlisted them for a special space program called Project A.L.I.E.N, where they are sent up into space to relive the James Cameron movie 'Alien' with Miss Sigourney Weaver serving as the program's official instructor/guide. If they actually make it out alive and have learned their lesson, we'll let them explore the space station.   Of course well..if they don't make it out alive...well let's just say it could get pretty messy and the Fandom Police department cannot be held responsible for incidents involving xenomorphs.    Oh, and if some of them still refuse to learn their lesson - we'll have them take care of a Baby Xenomorph for several months...guess how the Baby Xenomorph will be obtained....well...let's just say one of our inmates may suffer from a little bit of 'chest pains'.

I'm Officer Monstermaster13 and this has been Fandom Police, remember my dear friends - like regular crime, fandom based crime doesn't pay and when it does -   there might be a high price placed on your head. It doesn't pay to be a terrible fandom member or supporter. Luckily the fans of this show don't have anything to worry about because they are all good-eggs and will be rewarded for their hardwork.    Keep on reporting those bad fandom members out there, keep up the good work. If you see someone OL being attacked by an example of a bad fanbase member acting out of line call this number: 0809045-543-I-JUST-SAW-SOMEONE-ONLINE-GETTING-ATTACKED-BY-A-BAD-FANDOM-MEMBER-SO-I-AM-CALLING-THIS-NUMBER-TO-REPORT-THE-INCIDENT-I-JUST-SAW.

All images their original owners.
All fandoms themselves.
Fandom Police © Me.

Original meme:
missmusic93.deviantart.com/art…