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muura — MELVIN RECEIVES EYESIGHT
Published: 2010-10-24 14:32:52 +0000 UTC; Views: 28216; Favourites: 999; Downloads: 189
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Description
Ok let me explain:this doesn't really work as a oneshot when it comes to the story. It should continue. SOME DAY. This is the only one of my projects that is actually appropriate for children. It is sort of sad but also a good reason to draw more. I'll ignore how terrible this is and will upload this for UR PLSURE
Also the world should probably be explained more so you could get more out of this but I'll leave that to future comics I hope let's see au au
Also this is half a year old which including with the fact that I apparently just imagined that the 2€ paper is a redheaded stepchild and just whammed my hand and pen against it hoping that it would somehow produce drawings instead of being a bastard and a shit and a half to scan will hopefully be understandable to you.
Oh and the character here is this fellow [link] as a kid.
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Comments: 214
wow, this style looks amazing. so cute. I'd totally wanna read it if I was a kid, that's for sure. 
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WELL I LIKED IT. I love the way you drew all the characters and I liked that store a lot.
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fkjghdf muura you have such an amazing imagination 8I i am going to feel this all over yes
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This is SO cute and totally has the potential to be released and serialized seriously, whatever way possible. The panel of Mel, when he see the bucket falling on the Rabbits' head, is adorably smudged! (And also one of the few works in pencil I've seen from you! Yay!)
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Man, thanks <3 adorably smudged lmaooo thank youu
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The art is rough, and gets in the way of the story a bit, but, somehow, the strength of the story also uplifts the art. It's rare that I can stand reading something so long on this website, and, to be brutally honest, the weaknesses are glaring here even in the text, but the story and the characters have such an elemental feel to them, and the events are so intriguing, that I think if there were more to be read, I would read it, with pleasure. This story is worthy of better than you have so far given it, and I am happy to pay you the compliment of saying that you should do more and better with it. It would not be a waste of your time. Or mine.
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I think the roughness kind of adds to it a little; I guess it depends on your point of view, though. I myself am extremely fond of rough/sketchy things, so... xD
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Oh thank you SO MUCH for giving me honest critism, I am so happy! The mistakes in the art are noticeable to me of course but I'm really curious about the text being glaringly obvious as well?
I am really complemented and flattered by your attention, thank you <3
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I just meant that there were some grammatical mistakes - while the story is visible through them, they still strain the 'suspension of disbelief' needed for the reader to enjoy the story. For instance, in the 7th (?) panel, the line "The shop with the neat thing? And a really scary mister?" is...awkward, to say the least.
By the way, I totally understand that English is not your first language. Please don't think I'm making fun of you; if I didn't think the story were worth improving, I wouldn't be doing this.
Oh my gosh, did you draw a picture of a character from...what was it, Alfred J. Kwak one time?
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Ahhh I did that on purpose because he's a kid? but yeah writing dialogue for kids while straining to make english sound natural is pretty difficult.. I can't really see the mistakes myself. Might have to make someone proof-read these in the future.
Ah yeah I did!
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I thought I recognized your avatar! I saw that picture a long time ago and really liked it.
If you ever want help phrasing your English better, I'd be absolutely delighted to help you.
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Oh thank you! I'll try and remember this.
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I'll send you a note; those are easier to keep track of than comments like this.
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om
your characters and the stories you make. so good
<33
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That was awesome!! Wow this should be a movie or something!! Such cute character design and expressions.. I'd go see it!
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I fucking love this. Moar. I wanna know more about them and their world.
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How dare you keep something this good from our view!!
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The simple and most truthful excuse is that I forgot orz
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the cats in the begining remind me a lot of the ones from miyazaki's the cat returns, i was giggling so hard when the parade of cats showed up at haru's house in the middle of the night they look so silly standing on two feet!
...sorry i got kind of distracted there hah! but this is awesome dont worry about the quality of the paper because it came out lovely anyway! can't wait to see this develop more!
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gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh this is so damn cute ;_____;!!! i want to give melvin a big hug <3<3<3<3
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I love that shop with all the strange things and omg. And the whole comic has such an adorable feel to it overall!
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The story itself is oddly disjointed because every step feels like it's leading to something that doesn't happen xD It's got all these elements you've seen before, but mashed together kind of abruptly. Which is to say while I have NO IDEA what to make of the story or characters themselves, it feels fun and unexpected while pleasantly familiar. Your contour-style drawing in this is probably my favorite element, making everything feel loose and genuine. The background characters are a hoot! (Bo Peep Sheep, ha...). Overall, quite charming!
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Haha that's a good way to describe a lot of my comics.. I did notice that this in particular is awfully abrupt and should definitely continue as a story, which is why I mentioned that this doesn't exactly work as a one-shot but YEAH I'm happy I'm getting crits :3 Thank you!!
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I also really liked your play with the panels, putting things in and out of frames and even using the box as a background instead of a frame. You start sticking to keeping things inside the borders about halfway in, though, and I'd love to see more of that creative paneling!
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Oh thanks! Yeah I definitely enjoy non-restrictive panels, I never want to use the eraser either c_c
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Very charming. You do a nice job at creating a little world in there. Keep making great sequential art.
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Omgosh!!! this would make such a great book O_o
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I think it's be a really nice read and the style would look fine in a kids' comic....if the scan was clean... And color would be nice too.
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See even I am shocked at the quality this is scanned with. What was wrong with me.
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Tykkään tällasesta luontevannäkösestä jäljestä, tollasia vapaita ruutuja ja ruuturajat ylittäviä hahmoja ja kuplia!
Noi kissat on ihanasti tyylitelty :3
Antiikkikauppa ois hieno jos siellä näkyis vielä enemmän kaikkea siistiä krääsää jota vois ihastella! Kirjat hyllyllä lol :V
Ilmeet ja eleet ja kerronta toimiiiii
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No aivan totta kyllä, ens kerralla kun kaappensdaal näkyy niin ahdan sen täyteen kaikkea materiaa mitä maan päällä piisaa
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Amazing comic! I loved it. I hope I can see more comics from you in the future!
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I'll definitely be doing comics till the day I die <3
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Ahhh! This is adorable, and so clever and gripping!
I'm looking forward to reading the next part, whenever that should be. : )
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I have no idea, I did plan making these every now and then just to get a break from my more adult-themed stories ;w; can't promise anything though
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