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Description
"I don't want you to regret"
That what he said to me when I said I was thinking about selling my figure skates. The problem is I already regret things, I regret that I let a family make me feel so fat and horrible that I went anorexic! I regret that I would go to the rink and the girl thought she could buy me off by sticking money in my bag and I took it thinking it was mine and it fell out of my bag. I regret letting people kick me out of my own rink! I regret not making sure I had money put back so I could always skate once a week like I have done since I was 14.

I regret my feelings, because I get so angry when I see people saying they are getting married soon and have a date set. I knew that we would have a long engagement but people at the rink said I was crazy for not having a date set and for starting to plan. I regret not being able to help him I regret not being able to fix my car. I regret being scared to drive his car to work so he lost sleep so he could pick me up from work. I regret not being able to train my dog so he behave and doesn't bite me.

I regret regretting! He has given me the world and I feel like I am a crying baby that has been given life and shits on everything given to them. I am lonely and just ..and just...ugh (sigh) I know he works hard! I know he works to keep us in a home, and to buy food and pay bills, and yet here I am crying because I am stuck at home having to be silent in our studio apartment. I feel like I am a horrible person and he says I am not ....I don't know how to be a good fiance' or a good wife, I feel like I have gained love from an amazing man but I feel like I have lost things that make me who I am.

I really don't know what I am doing! What I am feeling and I am so close to hurting myself at times and I cry myself to sleep at night when he leaves for work because I just want him close I need to feel him by me! I am so tired of sleeping alone!

Description
"I don't want you to regret"
That what he said to me when I said I was thinking about selling my figure skates. The problem is I already regret things, I regret that I let a family make me feel so fat and horrible that I went anorexic! I regret that I would go to the rink and the girl thought she could buy me off by sticking money in my bag and I took it thinking it was mine and it fell out of my bag. I regret letting people kick me out of my own rink! I regret not making sure I had money put back so I could always skate once a week like I have done since I was 14.

I regret my feelings, because I get so angry when I see people saying they are getting married soon and have a date set. I knew that we would have a long engagement but people at the rink said I was crazy for not having a date set and for starting to plan. I regret not being able to help him I regret not being able to fix my car. I regret being scared to drive his car to work so he lost sleep so he could pick me up from work. I regret not being able to train my dog so he behave and doesn't bite me.

I regret regretting! He has given me the world and I feel like I am a crying baby that has been given life and shits on everything given to them. I am lonely and just ..and just...ugh (sigh) I know he works hard! I know he works to keep us in a home, and to buy food and pay bills, and yet here I am crying because I am stuck at home having to be silent in our studio apartment. I feel like I am a horrible person and he says I am not ....I don't know how to be a good fiance' or a good wife, I feel like I have gained love from an amazing man but I feel like I have lost things that make me who I am.

I really don't know what I am doing! What I am feeling and I am so close to hurting myself at times and I cry myself to sleep at night when he leaves for work because I just want him close I need to feel him by me! I am so tired of sleeping alone!