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Description
Theme music plays
Sora: This is "Whose line is it Disney way!" I'm scared, fearing my life, but let's have some fun anyways!
Sora eyes the evil fan girl mob and whimpers
Sora: Please?
Sora walks down the stairs and into his desk while the audience claps.
Sora: "Thank you, and once again welcome. Tonight, we have our four performers. (And no Sephiroth, the points still mean nothing) The contestants are, The one everyone fears, Sephiroth, Mr. Personality Hajime Saitou, Balmung of the Azure Sky and the ever moody Helba!!
The audience claps as the people are introduced.
Sora: "To avoid bloodshed, we'll move on to our first g - "
Sephiroth: "Sora, you moron, you are stupid enough to bring Balmung and that barely dressed woman onto the show?"
Sora: "Well yeah... People request Balmung, and Helba hacked into the program, so.... Yeah."
Sephiroth: At least my dumb dog isn't here....
Saitou lights a cigarette
Saitou: I don't care how the hell I got here. Might as well live with it.
Balmung looks from Saitou to Helba
Balmung: "... I do not associate with the likes of hackers....."
Helba bonks Balmung with her staff and laughs like a fan girl
Saitou glares at Helba
Saitou: She looks like a ferret with a ball stuck in her butt.
Security holds Helba back as she tries to murder Saitou.
Balmung starts drinking sake
Balmung: So... Bored.... @_@
Sephiroth: "Tonight, I will eliminate all of you - including the audience and those watching at home! And DT, she will die for no apparent reason! Humans must perish!"
Saitou: "Right..."

Sora sighs
Sora: Let’s start the first game….

Game #1: Doctor, Doctor, I’m going insane
Sora: "This first game is a game called 'Doctor'. Sephiroth will be sitting down as the doctor-dude-person and the others have to tell him their problems individually. So, first… Um…. Helba What's something that a normal person would be scared of?"
The audience shouts out random words as she takes a seat.
Sora: Okay, Helba, you’re afraid of the muffin men
Helba: I am not. I do not fear anything in this virtual world.
Sora: ¬¬ You are afraid of the muffin men. Follow the tune that Aerith plays and do so now.
Saitou takes another puff of his cigarette
Saitou: Ferrets who eat balls don’t understand anything. You’re wasting your time.
Sora: Saitou, no bloodshed. Please. And, you can’t smoke on the show.
Saitou tosses his bud at Sora, who demolishes the cigarette with a blizzard spell
Sora: Thanks for being a good sport
Saitou: Tsch

The music starts
Helba: Help me doc, I’m gonna crack, the muffin man thinks I’m a snack. If I don’t delete them, I’ll go insane, I just go and hijack a plane!
Sephiroth: You’re just a ferret whose just way too fat, it doesn’t matter if they think you’re a snack. Go jump of a cliff and thud with a splat, we’ll all dance and that will be that.
Helba sighs and stalks off to her chair
Helba: (I’ll kill him in the hoedown…. Oh yeah.)
Sora sighs
Sora: Sephiroth, don’t be so personal, alright?
Sephiroth: Sure, and after the show, you will duel me as promised. I have a new skill, yes I do.
Sora: I agreed to no such thing.
Balmung takes his seat, still drinking sake
Sora: Audience, what’s a normal thing a guy would be in love with?
The audience shouts out random words as Balmung kicks Helba’s seat out of the way and sits on a different one. Smirking at the flabbergasted hacker, he continues to drink sake
Sora: Okay, Balmung’s in love with a cat.
Balmung: What the hell!? I AM NOT in love with a damn cat!
Sora: xx You’re a drunk moron whose in love with a cat. Obey me or die.
Balmung grumbles and starts
Balmung: Hacker, Quacker, it doesn’t matter, I’m in love with a cat and I like to make its blood splatter. I want to know, is there help for me? Or am I better living in a tree?
Sephiroth: If I could I send you far away. At least you’re not a muffin’s prey. I’d like to help you if I could, but since you’re chicken, there’s no way I would
Sora: Moving on---
Balmung drops his sake
Balmung: Thanks for nothing, you scar faced freak, you must have killed a real doc offa the street. If you were to die, I promise I won’t cry.
Sora: SHUT THE %@#$ UP!
Everyone turns to look at Sora
Sora: What’s the problem?
Helba: Sora, your clothes. They’ve turned inverse.
Sora looks down at himself
Sora: Whoops!
Sora stabs himself with his keyblade and reverts to normal
Balmung: You should have let me fight him, you moronic fool!
Sephiroth: Shut the hell up you piece of –
Sora: -hits Balmung with a thunder spell- Shut up! Saitou, I’m not giving you a turn. Hope you don’t mind.
Saitou: Not at all.

Game #2: Talk Show

Sora: Balmung…. Are you all right?
Balmung drinks more sake
Balmung: Just… Fine. Hey, when did Helba get so darn fat?
Helba starts to beat the crap out of Balmung, but Security stops them

Sora: "Our next game, is a favorite, but NO BLOOD SHED! Anyways, all four contestants will be playing roles (Which they make up) on a talk show, with Saitou being the host. Now, his two guests, Helba and Balmung, will have to answer any of his questions, without question, and Sephiroth will be sitting in the crowd of demonic fan girls, just because he wants to! (I’m not in the mood for a damn fight….) So, Saitou, take it away!
Saitou: "Welcome to the 'All People Named Sora Have to be Stupid' talk show. I am your host, Sora, and have with me two people that do not like the famous keyblade master himself."
Sora: "What the?"
Saitou: Now, now, Sora, you’re the host who doesn’t do a damn thing, so shut up and stay that way.
Sora: Fine, meanie
Saitou points at Helba
Saitou: You! Ferret Person!! Who are you?
Helba: I am Balmung of the Azure Sky, I have a habit of drinking WAY too much. I’m in love with a pink, virtual monkey, and hackers should be worshiped! Bow I say! Bow!
Saitou: And you, man who’s got pretty wings! Who are you?
Balmung: I am Helba, an ignorant hacker with a marble for a butt. Oh yes. I have one thing to say. I am Sora’s mother!
Saitou: Complications already in this show! Mrs. Helba, do you have any proof that you’re the mother of the famous Key-Wielder?
Balmung: We have the same skin color, we’re both incredibly ugly and-
Helba cuts him off
Helba: Did I mention that Sora stole my hair-do? I mean, come on! Spiky hair was MY idea!
Saitou: Do you have proof? That Sora stole your hair?
Sephiroth: Sora’s a pathetic mortal who has absolutely no grip on reality. Let’s just kill him and take over the show!
Saitou looks up at Sephiroth
Saitou: Who the hell are you?
Sephiroth: I am… Sephiroth!
Sora, whispering: Sephiroth! You can’t be yourself!
Sephiroth: You wanna make something of it, little boy?
Sora: Sephiroth…. I hate you…
Sephiroth: Good.
Saitou: Mr. Sephiroth, what would you like to say?
Sephiroth: Let’s kill the idiots rolling on the stage in brutality, stick a mind control device on the monitor and control the world!
Saitou: I’m a cop.
Sephiroth: Damn….
Sora rams down on the buzzer, rubbing his head.

Game #3: Hoedown
Sora: "Well, for once, the hoedown will not be our final game."
Sephiroth and Saitou celebrate.
Sora: "But still, you will have to do one... What should this hoedown be about?"
The crowd throws out ideas
Sora: The Chicken head hoe-down? Dear muffins…. I’m gonna die.

The piano tune begins.

Balmung
Helba’s not a chicken head, she smells too bad
She makes chickens look really glad
Sometimes I think she looks like meat
Thank you God she’s off the street

Helba

Balmung’s moron, this much is true
I doubt he knows how to tie his shoe
He’s a chicken head, that’s easy to see
I think he bashed his head into a tree

Sephiroth

Saitou’s neat, but he needs a new job
Working for me, might one day pay off.
I’d like to force him to be my slave, but it’s a shame
I can’t go out into the rain.

Saitou
My name is Sanosuke and I'm a chicken head.
I walk around like the living dead
I’m such an idiot, I’m such a dope
My favorite food is ivory soap.

Sora: I think I'll give you all some points now. Let me see... the winner tonight is, why, it's Sephiroth!!!"
Sora and Sephiroth trade places
Sora: Right, so our next game is…
Sephiroth: I'm in control of the desk now, so I'll say the rules! And I HATE that game!
Sora: You don’t know which game I was going to say
Sephiroth: I really don’t care

Game #4 Questions Only

Sephiroth swivels around in his chair
Sephiroth: You know the drill, obey me as your Lord and Master, become my pathetic slave, blah blah blah….
Sora: SEPHIROTH! Tell the rules!
Sephiroth: Fine. The rules are simple. Questions. Only. The scene is Sora’s room.
Sora: Whatever….
Sora and Helba start to step towards the center, but a darkness hole snatches Helba and DT appears in her place
DT: x3 I’m back!
Sora: o.o Please, go ‘way.
DT snatches Sora
DT: Not a chance.
DT snaps her fingers and the stage is replaced with a glass floor overlooking a pool filled with flesh eating heartless
DT: You annoy me, you go boom. Heartless courteous of Ansem, who for some damn reason isn’t on the episode tonight! I WANT MY PANTS!

Sora: Do you like my room?
DT: Do I look blind?
Sora: Are you as stupid as you look?
DT: Do you not see the sand on your floor?
Sora: Is sand something we can eat?
DT: Are you stupid?
Sora snickers and walks away
DT: Hi there! Oh crap.
DT punches herself in the face and walks off
Balmung: Did you know you have a very big butt?
Helba: Are you addicted to sake?
Balmung: Heck, it’s VIRTUAL!
Balmung walks off
Sora: Where’s Riku?
Helba: Why should I tell you?
Sora: Do you sell groceries here?
Helba: What groceries?
Sora: The ones you’re stepping… AUGH!
Sora and DT change places
DT: Where’s that bathroom?
Helba: Why should I care?
DT: Did you know Sephiroth’s in love with you?
Helba: That’s really nasty.
Helba walks off
Balmung: Are you a hacker?
DT: Why do you like virtual things?
Balmung: Why do you care?
DT: Are all administrators as ugly as you are?
Balmung charges at DT
Balmung: SAY THAT AGAIN!
DT laughs and pushes a red button that drops Balmung into the pool., where he is murdered by rabid fan girls
DT: Tee hee! =^.^=
Sora: Well, that's all the time we have, so join us next time! Ah heck, we’ll be canceled anyway. It doesn’t matter.

Everyone returns to their regular seats, all except for Sephiroth
Sora: Are you going to move?
Sephiroth: Uh…. That’s a negative.
Sora: Please move?
Sephiroth: No.
Sora: Yes
Sephiroth: No
Sora: YES!
Sephiroth: No
Sora: Yes! I am the most powerful being in the universe! I can kill you!
Sephiroth: Go jump off a cliff.
Sora turns to the crowd
Sora: Well, that's another edition of 'Whose Line is it Disney-way?'. Join us next time, and I promise Sephiroth won't be on the next edition.
Sephiroth: "What?!"

Description
Theme music plays
Sora: This is "Whose line is it Disney way!" I'm scared, fearing my life, but let's have some fun anyways!
Sora eyes the evil fan girl mob and whimpers
Sora: Please?
Sora walks down the stairs and into his desk while the audience claps.
Sora: "Thank you, and once again welcome. Tonight, we have our four performers. (And no Sephiroth, the points still mean nothing) The contestants are, The one everyone fears, Sephiroth, Mr. Personality Hajime Saitou, Balmung of the Azure Sky and the ever moody Helba!!
The audience claps as the people are introduced.
Sora: "To avoid bloodshed, we'll move on to our first g - "
Sephiroth: "Sora, you moron, you are stupid enough to bring Balmung and that barely dressed woman onto the show?"
Sora: "Well yeah... People request Balmung, and Helba hacked into the program, so.... Yeah."
Sephiroth: At least my dumb dog isn't here....
Saitou lights a cigarette
Saitou: I don't care how the hell I got here. Might as well live with it.
Balmung looks from Saitou to Helba
Balmung: "... I do not associate with the likes of hackers....."
Helba bonks Balmung with her staff and laughs like a fan girl
Saitou glares at Helba
Saitou: She looks like a ferret with a ball stuck in her butt.
Security holds Helba back as she tries to murder Saitou.
Balmung starts drinking sake
Balmung: So... Bored.... @_@
Sephiroth: "Tonight, I will eliminate all of you - including the audience and those watching at home! And DT, she will die for no apparent reason! Humans must perish!"
Saitou: "Right..."

Sora sighs
Sora: Let’s start the first game….

Game #1: Doctor, Doctor, I’m going insane
Sora: "This first game is a game called 'Doctor'. Sephiroth will be sitting down as the doctor-dude-person and the others have to tell him their problems individually. So, first… Um…. Helba What's something that a normal person would be scared of?"
The audience shouts out random words as she takes a seat.
Sora: Okay, Helba, you’re afraid of the muffin men
Helba: I am not. I do not fear anything in this virtual world.
Sora: ¬¬ You are afraid of the muffin men. Follow the tune that Aerith plays and do so now.
Saitou takes another puff of his cigarette
Saitou: Ferrets who eat balls don’t understand anything. You’re wasting your time.
Sora: Saitou, no bloodshed. Please. And, you can’t smoke on the show.
Saitou tosses his bud at Sora, who demolishes the cigarette with a blizzard spell
Sora: Thanks for being a good sport
Saitou: Tsch

The music starts
Helba: Help me doc, I’m gonna crack, the muffin man thinks I’m a snack. If I don’t delete them, I’ll go insane, I just go and hijack a plane!
Sephiroth: You’re just a ferret whose just way too fat, it doesn’t matter if they think you’re a snack. Go jump of a cliff and thud with a splat, we’ll all dance and that will be that.
Helba sighs and stalks off to her chair
Helba: (I’ll kill him in the hoedown…. Oh yeah.)
Sora sighs
Sora: Sephiroth, don’t be so personal, alright?
Sephiroth: Sure, and after the show, you will duel me as promised. I have a new skill, yes I do.
Sora: I agreed to no such thing.
Balmung takes his seat, still drinking sake
Sora: Audience, what’s a normal thing a guy would be in love with?
The audience shouts out random words as Balmung kicks Helba’s seat out of the way and sits on a different one. Smirking at the flabbergasted hacker, he continues to drink sake
Sora: Okay, Balmung’s in love with a cat.
Balmung: What the hell!? I AM NOT in love with a damn cat!
Sora: xx You’re a drunk moron whose in love with a cat. Obey me or die.
Balmung grumbles and starts
Balmung: Hacker, Quacker, it doesn’t matter, I’m in love with a cat and I like to make its blood splatter. I want to know, is there help for me? Or am I better living in a tree?
Sephiroth: If I could I send you far away. At least you’re not a muffin’s prey. I’d like to help you if I could, but since you’re chicken, there’s no way I would
Sora: Moving on---
Balmung drops his sake
Balmung: Thanks for nothing, you scar faced freak, you must have killed a real doc offa the street. If you were to die, I promise I won’t cry.
Sora: SHUT THE %@#$ UP!
Everyone turns to look at Sora
Sora: What’s the problem?
Helba: Sora, your clothes. They’ve turned inverse.
Sora looks down at himself
Sora: Whoops!
Sora stabs himself with his keyblade and reverts to normal
Balmung: You should have let me fight him, you moronic fool!
Sephiroth: Shut the hell up you piece of –
Sora: -hits Balmung with a thunder spell- Shut up! Saitou, I’m not giving you a turn. Hope you don’t mind.
Saitou: Not at all.

Game #2: Talk Show

Sora: Balmung…. Are you all right?
Balmung drinks more sake
Balmung: Just… Fine. Hey, when did Helba get so darn fat?
Helba starts to beat the crap out of Balmung, but Security stops them

Sora: "Our next game, is a favorite, but NO BLOOD SHED! Anyways, all four contestants will be playing roles (Which they make up) on a talk show, with Saitou being the host. Now, his two guests, Helba and Balmung, will have to answer any of his questions, without question, and Sephiroth will be sitting in the crowd of demonic fan girls, just because he wants to! (I’m not in the mood for a damn fight….) So, Saitou, take it away!
Saitou: "Welcome to the 'All People Named Sora Have to be Stupid' talk show. I am your host, Sora, and have with me two people that do not like the famous keyblade master himself."
Sora: "What the?"
Saitou: Now, now, Sora, you’re the host who doesn’t do a damn thing, so shut up and stay that way.
Sora: Fine, meanie
Saitou points at Helba
Saitou: You! Ferret Person!! Who are you?
Helba: I am Balmung of the Azure Sky, I have a habit of drinking WAY too much. I’m in love with a pink, virtual monkey, and hackers should be worshiped! Bow I say! Bow!
Saitou: And you, man who’s got pretty wings! Who are you?
Balmung: I am Helba, an ignorant hacker with a marble for a butt. Oh yes. I have one thing to say. I am Sora’s mother!
Saitou: Complications already in this show! Mrs. Helba, do you have any proof that you’re the mother of the famous Key-Wielder?
Balmung: We have the same skin color, we’re both incredibly ugly and-
Helba cuts him off
Helba: Did I mention that Sora stole my hair-do? I mean, come on! Spiky hair was MY idea!
Saitou: Do you have proof? That Sora stole your hair?
Sephiroth: Sora’s a pathetic mortal who has absolutely no grip on reality. Let’s just kill him and take over the show!
Saitou looks up at Sephiroth
Saitou: Who the hell are you?
Sephiroth: I am… Sephiroth!
Sora, whispering: Sephiroth! You can’t be yourself!
Sephiroth: You wanna make something of it, little boy?
Sora: Sephiroth…. I hate you…
Sephiroth: Good.
Saitou: Mr. Sephiroth, what would you like to say?
Sephiroth: Let’s kill the idiots rolling on the stage in brutality, stick a mind control device on the monitor and control the world!
Saitou: I’m a cop.
Sephiroth: Damn….
Sora rams down on the buzzer, rubbing his head.

Game #3: Hoedown
Sora: "Well, for once, the hoedown will not be our final game."
Sephiroth and Saitou celebrate.
Sora: "But still, you will have to do one... What should this hoedown be about?"
The crowd throws out ideas
Sora: The Chicken head hoe-down? Dear muffins…. I’m gonna die.

The piano tune begins.

Balmung
Helba’s not a chicken head, she smells too bad
She makes chickens look really glad
Sometimes I think she looks like meat
Thank you God she’s off the street

Helba

Balmung’s moron, this much is true
I doubt he knows how to tie his shoe
He’s a chicken head, that’s easy to see
I think he bashed his head into a tree

Sephiroth

Saitou’s neat, but he needs a new job
Working for me, might one day pay off.
I’d like to force him to be my slave, but it’s a shame
I can’t go out into the rain.

Saitou
My name is Sanosuke and I'm a chicken head.
I walk around like the living dead
I’m such an idiot, I’m such a dope
My favorite food is ivory soap.

Sora: I think I'll give you all some points now. Let me see... the winner tonight is, why, it's Sephiroth!!!"
Sora and Sephiroth trade places
Sora: Right, so our next game is…
Sephiroth: I'm in control of the desk now, so I'll say the rules! And I HATE that game!
Sora: You don’t know which game I was going to say
Sephiroth: I really don’t care

Game #4 Questions Only

Sephiroth swivels around in his chair
Sephiroth: You know the drill, obey me as your Lord and Master, become my pathetic slave, blah blah blah….
Sora: SEPHIROTH! Tell the rules!
Sephiroth: Fine. The rules are simple. Questions. Only. The scene is Sora’s room.
Sora: Whatever….
Sora and Helba start to step towards the center, but a darkness hole snatches Helba and DT appears in her place
DT: x3 I’m back!
Sora: o.o Please, go ‘way.
DT snatches Sora
DT: Not a chance.
DT snaps her fingers and the stage is replaced with a glass floor overlooking a pool filled with flesh eating heartless
DT: You annoy me, you go boom. Heartless courteous of Ansem, who for some damn reason isn’t on the episode tonight! I WANT MY PANTS!

Sora: Do you like my room?
DT: Do I look blind?
Sora: Are you as stupid as you look?
DT: Do you not see the sand on your floor?
Sora: Is sand something we can eat?
DT: Are you stupid?
Sora snickers and walks away
DT: Hi there! Oh crap.
DT punches herself in the face and walks off
Balmung: Did you know you have a very big butt?
Helba: Are you addicted to sake?
Balmung: Heck, it’s VIRTUAL!
Balmung walks off
Sora: Where’s Riku?
Helba: Why should I tell you?
Sora: Do you sell groceries here?
Helba: What groceries?
Sora: The ones you’re stepping… AUGH!
Sora and DT change places
DT: Where’s that bathroom?
Helba: Why should I care?
DT: Did you know Sephiroth’s in love with you?
Helba: That’s really nasty.
Helba walks off
Balmung: Are you a hacker?
DT: Why do you like virtual things?
Balmung: Why do you care?
DT: Are all administrators as ugly as you are?
Balmung charges at DT
Balmung: SAY THAT AGAIN!
DT laughs and pushes a red button that drops Balmung into the pool., where he is murdered by rabid fan girls
DT: Tee hee! =^.^=
Sora: Well, that's all the time we have, so join us next time! Ah heck, we’ll be canceled anyway. It doesn’t matter.

Everyone returns to their regular seats, all except for Sephiroth
Sora: Are you going to move?
Sephiroth: Uh…. That’s a negative.
Sora: Please move?
Sephiroth: No.
Sora: Yes
Sephiroth: No
Sora: YES!
Sephiroth: No
Sora: Yes! I am the most powerful being in the universe! I can kill you!
Sephiroth: Go jump off a cliff.
Sora turns to the crowd
Sora: Well, that's another edition of 'Whose Line is it Disney-way?'. Join us next time, and I promise Sephiroth won't be on the next edition.
Sephiroth: "What?!"