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Your name is (f/n) (l/n) and you are an average human girl. Well, somewhat average; one thing that separates you from most is that you're friends with a bunch of aliens from another universe, called trolls. Some of them, like (least favorite troll), you really despise, but really, you're friendly with most of them.

Or... possibly a bit more than friendly, for one in particular. Not that he seems to be able to tell, despite being a self-proclaimed quadrant expert (god, that still gives you headaches, even now); he goes by the name of Karkat Vantas, and is endearingly angry and infuriatingly cute. Why couldn't you be a normal girl and fall for someone of your own goddamn species? But nope, guess fate decided it had other ideas.

You take a heavy seat at your cushy chair, snuggling into the blanket that always rests there and pulling your laptop close to your chest. Glasses off, hair out of ponytail, sweatshirt sleeves rolled down... you're ready to begin pestering.

The first person, of course, is Karkat, who seems to have left several messages during the few hours you were sleeping. Oops. It happens so often anymore, he really ought to be used to it by now... And of course it's mainly his fault that it happens, what with the screwed-up sleep schedule of all the trolls. You've been getting by on... Jesus, five hours of sleep a night? And that's when you force yourself to go to bed. Most of the time, you end up just falling asleep at the keyboard. Several key-mashes have occurred, leaving Karkat to assume the obvious and stop trolling you. For a bit, anyway.

chumHandle began pestering carcinoGeneticist at 5:21 am

CH: He¥ Krk t, ¥ou sti££ up???

CG: FUCK OFF, I WAS ABOUT TO GO TO SLEEP.

CH: Sorr¥ :C It's not £ike ¥ou don't do it to me...

CG: WELL, AT LEAST I HAVE THE GRACE TO LET YOU FUCKING SLEEP WHEN YOU SAY YOU NEED TO.

CH: ¥ou cn go s£eep if ¥ou wnt to!!! I just wnted to s@¥ he££o.

CG: FINE, I'M AWAKE AGAIN. WHAT DO YOU WANT, ASSHOLE?

CH: It's the weekend, so I hve @ bunch of free time, nd I wnted to t@£k with ¥ou! I shou£d probbl ¥ be s£eeping, but oh we££, no time for tht!

CG: HERE'S A FUCKING GREAT DEAL. YOU SLEEP. I SLEEP. I'LL PESTER YOU TONIGHT WHEN I WAKE UP. EVERYONE FUCKING WINS.

CH: Um, sure. T@£k to ¥ou tonight then, I guess.

carcinoGeneticist ceased pestering chumHandle at 5:25 am

Yes, you have a bit of a typing quirk. But hey, it's not as bad as one of your friends', so no one really minds. You gently place your laptop off to the side and push yourself out of your chair, giving it one long, regretful look before flopping into bed. You're still tired from the three hours of sleep you got last night, so the moment your head hits the pillow (no blankets required), you're fast asleep.

When you awake, the dream you had is garbled, only small images and sounds flashing in your mind; the large picture has been obscured. Which is probably a good thing, considering one of the images is Karkat half-dressed. You blush a little, a faint pinkish tinge coloring your cheeks--- which, may I add, does not happen very often. Though you will splutter at people to shut up when they start making sexual references, you never blush, you just stare quite innocently.

It's then you realize that a little face is right above yours. "Wake up, ________! You missed dinner and I really wanna see a movie tonight!" That would be your constantly cheerful little brother, who was never allowed to go anywhere alone. And a damn good thing, he would probably end up burning something down.

You roll over, shielding your eyes with one of your rumpled blankets. "Go away! I'm still tired and so help me, if you're still here when I open my eyes again you are going to be in some major pain." Actually, once he leaves you're heading straight for your laptop, but he doesn't have to know that.

He knows to take your threats seriously and darts out the door with a squared little squeak. You smile slightly, hauling yourself away from the lovely, warm sheets, over to your computer. This is why you always keep a blanket at hand.

chumHandle began pestering carcinoGeneticist at 7:57 pm

CH: O¥, Krk t! ¥ou up ¥et?

CH: K@@@@rk @@@@t

CH: ¥ou cn 't hide from M€!!!

CG: WHAT

CG: WHAT DO YOU FUCKING WANT

CG: OH WAIT, I SAID I WOULD TALK TO YOU.

CG: WELL, HERE'S A FUCKING HELLO

CH: He££o to ¥ou too, grump¥ pNTS . XP

CG: OKAY, HANG ON A SECOND

CG: JUST ONE FUCKING SECOND.

CG: YOU'RE FLUSHED FOR SOMEONE

CG: AREN'T YOU

CG: I CAN FUCKING TELL

CG: THROUGH THE GODDAMN CHAT

CG: YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FLUSHED FOR SOMEONE, NO DENYING IT

CH: ...

CG: SO WHO IS IT

CG: I TOLD YOU, I AM A FUCKING QUADRANT EXPERT

CG: I CAN HELP

CH: ...

CG: OH, NOT GONNA FUCKING SPILL SO EASILY?

CG: SPILL IT, (l/n), I DON'T HAVE ALL NIGHT.

CH: Krk t...

CG: OH COME ON, DON'T FUCKING BE SHY NOW

CG: UGH, FINE. I PROMISE I WON'T LAUGH IF YOU TELL ME

CG: I JUST WANT TO FUCKING HELP, YOU FUCKASS!

Well, this certainly isn't going as planned. Originally, it was going to be two nights from now, on the anniversary of your meeting, that you were going to tell him. But it looks like Karkat has a better idea: embarrass the fuck out of you right now! Oh well. Here goes nothing.

CH: Just give me @ second to work up m¥ nerve, ok@¥?

CH: It's ¥ou.

CG: ...

CH: I'm f£ushed for ¥ou, Krk t, I think I hve been for a while.

CG: HAHAHA, THIS IS FUCKING PERFECT.

CH: Wht... do ¥ou men ...?

CG: PERFECT, I TELL YOU. THIS TOTALLY JUST FUCKING SPARED ME THE POSSIBILTY OF TOTAL REJECTION AND UTTER FUCKING HUMILIATION.

CH: Are ¥ou... f£ushed for me too???

CG: NO, I'M TOTALLY CALIGINOUS FOR YOU.

CG: USE YOUR THINK-PAN, DUMBASS! YES, I'M FUCKING FLUSHED FOR YOU!

CH: Ho£¥ shit... God, ¥ou hve no ide@ how hppY this mkes me.

CH: £IK€, R€€€€€€€€A££¥ FUCKING HAPPY.

CG: DON'T GET TOO EXCITED, (l/n). YOU'RE STILL A DUMBASS, EVEN IF I GUESS YOU'RE MY FUCKING MATESPRIT TOO.

CH: Thnks , Krk t C: ¥ou won't regret this!

chumHandle ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist at 8:12 pm

CG: I SHOULD FUCKING HOPE NOT.

carcinoGeneticist logged off