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Ryumancer — Death Battle Idea #2
Published: 2013-01-19 20:19:00 +0000 UTC; Views: 531; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 0
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This one would be one of my all-time favorite Death Battles in history. Both of these men have sliced up more people than either of them can count. They both look badass with shades or goggles and have pretty good vision when it comes to the dark.Blade the katana-wielding Vampire Hunter vs Riddick the knife-wielding Renegade Hero
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Comments: 15
Here's some background material on our Death Match Contestants.
The Super Powers:
Riddick has Furyan Energy (TM) that gives him incredible speed, strength, and endurance. It can also blast out of Riddick, killing people within a thirty foot blast radius. Blade has incredible agility and speed from having vampire blood. Both wear freaky shades to protect their eyes and both are extremely good at seeing in the dark.
The Voice:
Riddick sounds more intimidating than Blade. Then again, Blade doesn't sound like the poster boy for Halls Throat Lozenges.
The Muscles:
Riddick is seriously built. Blade may be sculpted, but Riddick has the mass as well. There's no question who would win an arm wrestling contest.
The Blades:
Blade's got more of them. A lot more. Favors a sword, silver spikes, and a folding throwing sickle gizmo. Riddick sticks only to knives, either ones he makes himself or ones he takes off the people he kills. Blade's got some reach on Riddick but Riddick's fought guys with samurai swords before (see the "Riddick:"Dark Fury" DVD). Both of them will use a gun if they have to, Blade especially.
The Fashion:
Blade's got better clothes than Riddick. No contest. Blade goes for leather coats like Shaft, dresses better and has full body tattoo work. Riddick wears the same outfit in both films and no tats, either.
The Body Armor:
Blade uses it, Riddick doesn't.
The Wheels:
Blade's got a sweet ride and a bad-boy bike. Riddick steals other people's sweet rides and bad-boy bikes.
The Biography:
Blade's mother was killed by a vampire. Riddick started out in a liquor store trash bin. Blade was raised by a stepfather/ mentor. Riddick was raised by foster families. Blade spends most of his time in several "secret hideouts" and a funky apartment. Riddick spends most of his time in prison, getting sent to prison, or on the run from bounty hunters who want to put him back in prison.
The Rap Sheet:
Blade doesn't have one (though he has been arrested once). Riddick does, for several murders. On top of that, Riddick keeps getting caught by losers. First movie, he got caught by a drug addict "merc" with a morphine habit. Second movie, he got caught again by a chain-smoking, scruffy drunk with huge side burns and a loser crew.
The Habit:
Riddick doesn't have one (though he does drink). Blade does for a drug to reduce his "vampire cravings". Like all junkies, Blade has a growing tolerance to the smack he's taking. Forget an arm full of needle tracks, Blade's so strung out he's injecting the stuff right into his neck.
The Babes:
Blade gets laid. Blade gets laid with super-sexy vampire chicks. Blade is a serious candidate for being the 21st century's Shaft. The man definitely has a way with the ladies. As amazing as it sounds, in both of his movies, Riddick never even kisses a girl. He roughs a couple of girls up, sniffs a couple, but that's it. Makes you wonder if he picked up a taste for guys in prison or if he's got a medical problem.
The Enemies:
Blade takes on vampires, ultra-vampires, and "pure" vampires. He's a one-trick pony. Riddick takes on a whole planet full of the worst aliens since The Alien (1979). Riddick also beat a huge armada of religious fanatic "Necromongers" who blow up every planet they visit and try to force everyone in the universe to convert to their religion. If you think that's extreme, you should see what they do if some cartoonist on a planet draws a silly cartoon of their founder, an author writes a fictional book about their leaders, a film-maker does a documentary on the planets they already blew up, or anyone in the universe treats their Most Noble And Glorious Necromonger Book with the slightest disrespect. Then they get nasty.
The Friends:
Blade has a small circle of close friends who can fight the way he does. Riddick doesn't have any friends. Riddick eventually kills the Necromonger leader (imagine an Ayatollah or Jim Jones in weird armor) which makes him the new head honcho, so he's got a couple million followers and a huge planet-destroying armada now.
The Real World:
When it comes to fighting, Diesel has done it for real for over a decade as a nightclub bouncer. He's studied the Filipino martial art of Kali and has trained with UFC sparring partners. Wesley Snipes started out wanting to be a ballet dancer (really!), but has a 5th degree black belt in karate, studies Kung Fu, and the acrobatic Brazilian fight/dance system of Capoeira.
The Movies:
Blade's been in three of them and they've been way more successful. The Chronicles of Riddick was the biggest flop in 2004.
The Soundtracks:
All three Blade movies had successful soundtracks with top artists. Both Pitch Black and Riddick soundtracks were scores by Graeme Revell. Soundtrack collectors and critics consider the scores to be poor examples of Revell's work. It gets worse. Pitch Black was such a weak offering, it was doubled with the Bride of Chucky soundtrack (really!). That's so sad.
The Rip-Offs:
Blade's got a bunch. In "Pitch Black" (2000) Riddick snarls "Did NOT know who he was fucking with." In Blade 2 (2002), Blade snarls, "You obviously do NOT know who you are fucking with." Same inflection. Blade's script writers need a smacking. So does Blade's poster photographer. On June 11, 2004. The Chronicles of Riddick was released. One of the posters showed Riddick with his arms crossed holding his sickle blades. Six months later, Blade Trinity was released December 10, 2004 Guess what pose Blade takes? Crossed arms holding sickle blades. Blade isn't just a Highlander wanna-be with the trenchcoat and the sword. He's a Riddick wanna-be.
...when he isn't a Grace Jones wanna-be. Blade's oh-so-bad, sculpted, shaved on the sides, hairstyle was seen first on Grace Jones's character "Zula" in "Conan The Destroyer" (1984). That's right, Blade swiped his hairstyle from something Grace Jones wore 20 years ago before ripping off Riddick's script writers and photographer as well.
The Fans:
Hell Hath No Fury... Diesel (Riddick) has more fans, more fan sites, more fan forums than Snipes (Blade). Worse, most of Diesel's fans are obsessed women. One command from Riddick like, "the lady who brings me Snipes' head gets to shave mine", and Blade has several million women out for his blood. Those ladies make the Necromongers seem downright laid back when it comes to their worship of the Vin-man.
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Damn! That's really detailed! Thanks.
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Hey, no problem. It broke my heart when Grudge Match stopped updating their site. This piece was orginally written for them.
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Oh that was just the start of a much bigger piece! The idea for their confrontation is an homage the famous "gun store" scene in The Terminator, as is some of the clerk's dialogue. Most of Riddick and Blade's dialogue comes from lines in their movies. Knife and gun stores both attract some people who "belong in the asshole hall of fame". So, I decided to have some fun with the scene. Clerks politely humoring customers they privately laugh at, the posturing routine other customers do in the store, companies giving knives outrageously macho names, magazines hiring hacks to shamelessly hype the stuff non-stop, gullible readers going into a buying frenzy... This kind of thing really does go on.
The Grudge-Match Scenario:
It was a slow summer day at Cutlery World and the clerk was trying to look busy by polishing the glass counter. Only an hour more until closing time and another day was done. The door chime rang as a tall, heavily muscled man walked in. Black tank-top, black cargo pants and heavy black boots. Summer uniform of the SWAT wanna-be. The clothes, the tough-guy swagger, and the shaved head were bad enough. Then there were the tinted swimming goggles. What kind of a nut walks around wearing all-black and swimming goggles? Tough guy headed straight for the combat knives. Never fails. Something about those long, sharp blades always attracts the crazies. The clerk put on a helpful smile.
"Hi, welcome to Cutlery World. I'm Ted, may I help you?"
"Richard B. Riddick. Escaped convict. Murderer. You can start helping by letting me see that United Cutlery Butcher's Bay Special."
Oh, no. One of them, the BAD crazies. What's with that voice? The guy sounds like he has a throat problem. Let's make the sale and get him out of here. "So, what do you think? That's Italian. It has a Tigon finish and an Ergo handle. That's a good knife. It's perfect for home defense."
Riddick started twirling the knife, trying to impress the clerk. "I think it's half a gram heavy on the back end", growled Riddick.
Before the clerk could answer, the door chime rang again and a powerfully built African-American man rushed in, his full-length black leather trench coat flapping behind him. The Muzak system magically switched to the theme from Shaft. But Shaft never shaved the sides of his head or had it decorated with tattoos. He didn't wear a sword strapped to his back, either.
"Hi, welcome to Cutlery World. I'm Ted, may I help you?"
"The name's Blade. People call me the Day Walker."
The clerk's smile faltered. Blade? This dude seriously calls himself "Blade the Day Walker"? Is that like Luke the Sky Walker? There's no way his parents named him "Blade", probably Eustace or something. He's even wearing some kind of weird body armor and a black leather trench coat in middle of July. The heat must be killing the guy. What's with the sword? He watches too much Highlander. Two hard-core crazies in the same day at the same time. Great.
"I gotta have one! I gotta have one!" Blade started excitedly waving a copy of Tactical Knives Magazine at the clerk. There, on the cover of the mag was the United Cultery Butcher's Bay Special and Blade was getting more worked up by the second. "Just got through readin' about it! Experts like Ralph Mroz and Michael Janich say it's the best knife for CQC, EDC, HALO, SPECWAR, jungle-ops and killing vampires! If a guy like Mike Janich is backin' this blade, then I need one right now!!"
"Uhh... very popular knife," noted the clerk. "In fact, that guy over there is holding the only one we've got."
"Extremely bad timing," snorted Riddick. "I was just going to put a deposit on it for layaway."
"So you ain't paid for it yet, have you?" sneered Blade. "Too bad, 'cuz I'm layin' down cash-money that one, Baldy."
Riddick seethed. "You can wait for the next one to come in. Go get some more tattoos. Freak."
"Keep pushing, asshole, keep pushing." Blade started to close the distance.
Riddick slowly raised his goggles, revealing a silver-eyed glare. "Got an idea. Let's step outside so we don't get blood all over the carpet."
Blade shrugged and started to unstrap his sword. "Well, those are real hollow words coming from a man wearing stupid lookin' contacts. You're on. Outside. Now."
Riddick put the knife back on the counter and the two men headed out the door into the twilight...
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I always wondered how the regulars on Grudge-Match would have voted on this one.
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I would've voted for Riddick.
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Awww... That's sweet! Personally, I haven't the faintest idea who would really win. Most people, nearly everyone I think, simply votes for the character they like the most regardless.
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Why do you see Blade beating Riddick easy? Just curious. Not to mention this Death Battle Idea had only 2 comments on it counting this one. lol
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I didn't see anything riddick related plus I know Blade more.
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Riddick had enhancements done to his eyeballs to help him see much better in the darkness, even in pitch black; hence the title of the first movie he was in, "Pitch Black".
He also has a far above average threshold for pain. When he was handcuffed to a pillar, he noticed an opening in it and WILLINGLY dislocated his shoulders and relocating them to get his arms through that opening, effectively freeing himself.
He is a very capable knife wielder. And was able to keep up with an opponent much faster than himself in the second movie.
I really suggest seeing the two movies or at least look up some clips of his feats. He puts on an act that he's just another heartless serial killer, but deep down...he's more benevolent than that.
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