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saphira2k5 — Hybrid Experiment - Chapter 2
Published: 2014-01-10 20:26:40 +0000 UTC; Views: 315; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Description        I was thrown back into my cage, head banging against the back wall and wings almost caught by the closing door.
       I was in a load of pain, despite doing my best not to get hurt. I cringed, closing my eyes shut tight as I forced my wings into my back, feeling the bones, bones, and leathery skin of my wings bend and break and change as they melded back into whatever allowed me to do this. I was different from other avian hybrids aside from my ability to speak and having actually been in the outside world before, even if I couldn't remember a lot of it. My DNA had been grafted with a vampire bat's. So, not only did I have fangs, I also had the ability to survive on blood and blood alone. Which to my dismay the lab coats had found out a few years ago, and had been forcing me to live on nothing but blood ever since. Why? I had no clue. They were insane, that's all I knew, and just about what all the other experiments understood. They didn't care that I was a fifteen year old girl; I was just their experiment that they needed to figure out.
       But that wasn't all that set me apart. Somehow, I had the ability to force my brownish/blackish leathery wings from my back. And no, it wasn't “sprouting” or “growing.” They literally were forced out of my back each time I needed to use them; the bone growing, forming, and changing first every time, along with the muscle, tendons, and skin. I had no clue why this happened, but boy, did it hurt. The scientists tried to analyze and figure out this process for a while - which were also some of the worst weeks if my life - but even after all of it I couldn't understand what the hell their explanation was. It was too complex.
       So because of this I usually thought it best to keep my wings out. But not this time. My cage was feeling more cramped than usual, so I had to put them back. Not to mention the fact that I was completely exhausted, and my wings had been aching. I wasn't sure if it was true or not, but I always felt like the muscles somehow ended up feeling more rested when I left them in my back.
       But today's testing had not been a good one. It was another flight test, forcing me to literally go through hoops, some of various sizes, and seeing how well I did. The catch though, was that they were moving, all at various speeds, at different heights, and going in different directions. And each time it was a different, seemingly randomly selected one, only distinguishable by a small green light near the bottom instead of red, that I had to do my quickest to find, and best to go through. And each time I messed up in even the tiniest of ways - or took too long to find the next one - I was greeted with a painful shock from the ankle bracelet they put on me. Shocking seemed to be their favorite thing to use to “promote” success.
       It didn't help that all of the hoops were a pinkish/red color, causing me to automatically think - if only subconsciously - that they weren't or might not have been the right ones.
       And this went on for hours.
       I still didn't know if they put me back in here because my testing time was up, or because I was doing so poorly for what must have been the last hour that they decided to just give it up since the shocks weren't helping me improve anymore.
       Despite how I tired I felt, resting my dizzying head against the back of the cage after I just had my head smashed against it, I remembered that there was one thing of interest to the test today besides seeing how pained or least pained I could come out of it.
       A few times there was a hoop close to the ceiling I'd have to go reach. The first two or three times I didn't notice it, but there was a window near the top of the wall. But not of the outside, no. There were never any windows in this facility. Certainly not to the outside, anyway. They got rid of those after some of the mutants got wily and some avians escaped. I couldn't go with them though.
       I figured it used to be an observation deck, which wasn't at all uncommon here. They were always changing, rearranging, and reassembling rooms; making them bigger, smaller, or joining them together. So sometimes they just got lazy and put glass windows where something else might have been. It didn't make any difference though, there was still no escape. If anything those misplaced windows were just another tool they used to keep you fearful and in your place.
       But after I realized it was there, eventually I dared to take a look through it. It was only a moment's glance, but it was still something I hadn't expected to see. A part of me dreaded, and knew, that it would be another experiment's testing. But I didn't expect it to be forcing them to fight Erasers. Even more of a surprise to me was that there was only one experiment. And he was winning.
       As far as I could see he looked human for the most part. Except for his extremely pale white skin, and silver hair. But beyond that, I couldn't see anything else that made him stand apart. There were no scales or feathers, animal-like ears or tails, claws or fangs. But I also realized that I had been far away, up above, and had only a moment to take this all in before I went through the hoops again.
       The next time I had managed to go up was a few minutes later, and gasped in shock at the sight, eyes widening. I looked and saw the experiment covered in blood, on his knees. I wasn't sure if any of it was his or not, but the rest was definitely the Erasers, as I saw a lot of bodies lying around, not moving. The boy with silver hair - who I now also realized was close to my age, a teenager - was looking up, obviously distressed, and appeared to be pleading with the lab coat standing in front of him. The own coat said something short, and it only seemed to make him beg harder. I wanted to know what they were talking about, seeing as the experiment could obviously speak, but was interrupted from my thoughts by a painful shock running through my body. I knew I couldn't have stayed and watched any longer, so I continued testing again.
       I only made it up there one more time again, but by the time I had the boy, and the lab coat, were gone.

       It wasn't a day later sitting in my cage, my body and bones aching from being pushed beyond what I was capable and not having a moment to stop, that I was snapped out of my daze by a rap on the top of my cage. I flinched automatically, startled, before looking at what stood outside. It was an Eraser, sneering down at me. I felt my blood run cold at the sight.
       “Come on out of there, you vermin,” he called. It took not even a second to realize that he hadn't opened it yet. I opened my mouth, preparing to actually speak for the first time in what felt like ages, before I was interrupted by my cage being lifted and tossed. It rolled across the floor a few times, my body and head painfully bashing against both it and the floor multiple times, before I finally came to a stop, on my side. A mix between a whimper and a gasp of pain escaped my lips, cringing as I felt blood from a cut drip into my eye.
       I managed to right myself and sit up after some difficulty, and looked over at my fellow caged mutants. Some were huddled, cowering in the furthest corner of their cages, fearing that it might be them in the same position I was in next time. Some hadn't even noticed, staring blankly at the same spot they had before, either because they were mentally broken or because all they cared about was what happened to them and them alone. They must have known on some way that fearing what might happen next, fearing the future was pointless because it wasn't actually happening yet, and might not at all. If only the rest of us were so lucky. Then maybe I'd actually be able to get some sleep. Others still actually were asleep, having grown accustomed to the sudden, random clashes of noise that proved to happen, or were too exhausted to be woken up from their slumber.
       There were two mutants' reactions, however, that stood out from the rest. One was of my lizard neighbor, who looked at me for just a moment with those piercing yellow eyes, before turning away. It didn't seem to be in fear though, or apathy. It was sadness. I hadn't seen an expression of sadness from someone else caring for another in a long time, let alone that expression being given to me. It was always for oneself that tears were shed. Caring for another being in this place was almost certain heartbreak, which was why it was avoided. And to see it now...it was almost a foreign concept.
       The other was of an experiment I'd never seen before, probably because she had been blocked from my sight from where my cage previously sat. I wasn't sure what she had been mixed with, but she appeared just a little bit younger than I. And her expression was one I never thought possible, and didn't think I'd ever see in all my life here. Her look was one of pure rage. It was a nasty look, and even made me want to flinch, if I hadn't realized that she was not an Eraser, and was trapped just like me.
       Before I could dwell on the matter further though, I was roughly pulled out of my dog crate, not having heard the door open, and yanked to my unsteady feet.
       “You're coming with me,” the Eraser growled, before looking me over, as if inspecting something.
       “You don't look like much of a freak. In fact, you look...rather human,” he mused, before his sneer returned. “All the more ways to make you a freak.”
       “Hey! Look who's talking!” A voice suddenly called out. We both turned our heads to see the younger mutant girl, whose face hadn't changed in her expression of anger and hatred. She could speak? I realized, shocked.
       The Eraser blinked a moment, apparently just as surprised as I was, before quickly regaining his composure. “You want me to come over there and give you a good beating?” He threatened. At that, the girl quieted down, settling back in her cage as her expression lessened in volume.
       Was she new or something? Surely she couldn't have been here for so long and I hadn't noticed her presence if she seemed to be so vocal and expressive of her hate. It was something I never expected to see, nor had even thought of doing, and it left my mind reeling. Even as the Eraser guided me out if the room and started walking down the blindingly white hallways.
       After a minute or so I finally snapped out of it. Something was wrong.
       “Wh...Where are we going?” I croaked out, my voice a bit rusty from disuse. I hadn't been forced to scream in pain in a while, which I supposed was good. But then again I supposed I got used to the tests in some ways. They always got a yelp or short yell from me though. Not enough practice for a voice.
       “Oh, you speak, too? Well, isn't that somethin',” the Eraser said, a lot less surprised after hearing the other mutant before.
       I waited a few seconds before I realized he wasn't answering. “I-I mean it...Where's the lab coat?” I asked, my voice sounding a bit better. Whenever there was an Eraser escort, there was always a lab coat not too far away that I'd be given to.
       I hadn't realized it until now but we'd gradually slowed down, eventually coming to a stop which I subconsciously followed. I looked around, not finding it hard to see the multiple Erasers suddenly appear and coming towards me and the other. I looked to the Eraser who “escorted” me, only to find him off to the side and leaning against the wall, arms crossed. He just seemed to be calmly watching and waiting, an easy smirk on his face. I felt a lump form in my throat.
       “W-w-what's going on?” I got out, my voice shaking not from lack of use, but out of fear now, as I looked from him to the other Erasers beginning to crowd around me. I tried to ignore the hungry, mad dog look in their eyes, and saliva dripping down their muzzles.
       “Oh, you don't know, little experiment?” The same Eraser asked in a mocking tone. “You've been deemed a failure after your little antics in yesterday's flight test. Or whatever the hell it was. You've been slated for termination.”
       I could just hear the joy on his voice, as my breath froze in my throat. “Failure?” Me? T-t-termination? I felt like I was about to puke, suddenly feeling dizzy and faint.
       The group of Erasers closed in on me, getting closer and closer, and all I could do was barely manage a few weak steps back. I was soon backed against the wall.
       I tried to ignore the putrid stink coming off their breath, as they looked at me with savage hunger and blood lust in their eyes, paralyzed with fear.
       The closest one let out a growl before snapping his jaws shut close near my face, toying with me. Suddenly, something seemed to change inside me, and took over in that instant. I wasn't myself anymore, acting solely on instinct as I was reminded of the fangs I had in my mouth. I quickly snapped forward and sunk my fangs into his neck, draining him of blood in record time of less than two seconds. The body dropped to the floor while another realized what I'd done and went to take action. Before he could, however, I already sent a punch to his gut as he doubled over, before reaching over and snapping the wolf hybrid's neck with a strong thrust of my arms.
       That was all I managed to do before another slammed me into the wall, pinning me there, and my fear quickly returned. I struggled against the Eraser's grip but it was no use. I tried to tell myself that it would be best if I just accepted my death right here, right now, but my racing heart said otherwise. I shut my eyes tight in apprehension.
       “Hey, stop that!” A voice yelled. I felt the hot breath of the Eraser pinning me move away, probably turning to see who it was. I didn't open my eyes to see who, still expecting to die any second.
       “Who the hell are you?” one of them snarled.
       Why were they asking that? It was a lab coat, wasn't it? They would never be questioning them...Well, not about who they were, anyway.
       “Shut up, you idiots, the lab people told us to listen to him.” The Eraser who'd taken me here, the one who seemed to be the leader of the group said, sounding less calm.
       I had to open my eyes at this point, and was shocked to see the silver haired boy from the day before. Only now I could see his eyes, and noticed they were an icy blue color. The combination of his eye and hair color made a striking combination to compliment his features, not being something most mutants had. Their hair color - if they had it - was usually natural colors, whether from their human side or whatever animal they were mixed with, normally being browns, blacks, golden-blondes, or auburns. Yet despite the odd color, it seemed strangely fitting.
       “And why the hell should we?” The Eraser holding me continued. “He's just another experimental freak.”
       I thought I saw the boy wince just the slightest bit, but I couldn't be sure. He was silent a moment, before a hard look entered his eyes. “Oh, I'll show you why.”
       Before I knew it the Eraser had one of its arms pulled back from me, snapped, before it dropped to the floor, where the boy rested his foot against the Eraser's neck. He looked down at it with a cold, empty expression, and I wondered if that was how he looked the other day when he was forced to fight those Erasers. It was an eerie look, and sent chills down my spine.
       Just when I thought he was finished - the Eraser groaning in pain at his feet, or at least trying to with a foot to his throat - he wasn't. In the next instant he forced his foot down, and a sickening crack could be heard. It resounded in my ears, and all I could do was stand and stare in shock.
       “Anyone else have a problem?” He questioned, looking around at the nervous and shocked faces of the few remaining Erasers. The leader seemed a bit nervous, wearing a wary smile, but also looking a bit impressed at the same time.
       Finally, one of them spoke up. “Y...You can't do that! What the hell are you doing out of your cage, anyway? Maybe we should terminate you, too!”
       I was reminded of the fact that they had come and intended to kill me, and began shaking almost instantly.
       The boy looked over at me, before back at them, his steely gaze set, daring them to come near. Was he...protecting me? I just now realized.
       Finally the leader spoke again, grumbling to himself. “I don't care what he is. Project Striker or not, this has gone way too far. Take him out.” He ordered the remaining two.
       As they prepared to fight the leader backed away a bit. The remaining two Erasers snapped and snarled at the boy, but I knew that they would lose. I vaguely registered that the leader had headed down the hall, probably understanding that same fact. I couldn't focus on the sights and sounds before me as I stared out into the space, the shock and realization of how close I had been to death finally sinking in. The growls, yips, barks, and finally whines of the Erasers barely registered in my ears as the boy quickly fought them. The faint sound of a howl was slowly brought to my attention as I began focusing on it. There was another noise. Someone...
       “Huh?” I blinked, snapping out of my daze. The boy was talking to me.
       “Didn't you hear me? I said run, you idiot!” The boy yelled, he sounded urgent.
       I hear the howling continue, before being accompanied by a few more howls in chorus. “The howling...” I said, unable to keep myself from focusing on it.
       “That coward must have called for backup,” he growled, meaning the leader who'd taken off. He grabbed me by shoulders and shook. “Run, damn it. Get out of here.”
       For once I could actually think of someone other than myself while trapped in this hell hole. But then again, I was on my way to freedom of this place, so I wondered if it really counted when I asked, “But what about you?”
       “I'll hold them off,” he said, turning to face the direction of the hallway where the howls were getting louder, and closer.
       “But – ” I couldn't just leave him here.
       “Damn it just move!” He pushed me forward and I stumbled a few steps. Still I hesitated.
       The Erasers would make it to where he - I - stood in a matter of seconds now.
       “Run!” He screamed, with such force that I had no choice but to comply.
       My feet stumbled forward if their own accord, clumsily, shakily at first, as unsure in step as my mind was. But soon I got used to it, and soon I was running. Faster and faster. As fast as my feet would take me, as fast as my body could handle. Because as I ran I heard the sound of growling and panting behind me, practically right on my heels. And it terrified me.
       But what scared me more, perhaps, was the sound, further away, of the growls and barks, where the rest of the pack must have stayed. Where the boy was. And I couldn't hear any sound of him fighting back. He could have been getting torn apart that very minute and I wouldn't know.
       Because I couldn't look back. If I looked back and saw those snapping jaws and murderous eyes staring into my soul right behind me I'd give into fear, and stop dead in my tracks. Then I would dead, and everything that boy had just risked his life for would have been for nothing.
       And so I couldn't look back at him one last time. I could only do one thing
       So instead, I ran.
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Comments: 34

VariaGuardians [2015-12-29 16:54:37 +0000 UTC]

I really like this story and please update it soon  

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ingmaster5 [2014-01-13 22:31:14 +0000 UTC]

ooooh cool. keep this going, I enjoy the draining of blood in less than two seconds.


drawing a slight comparison to my own book i was telling you about the first Rival to the main character is actually a guy who's power makes him look half wolf. but he's also a genius at strategy so he gets the better of Racada at every turn. until the end where Where Racada's Split personalities finally merge, and he's no longer predictable in any sense of the word... did i mention that Racada was mentally certifiable? 

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-14 01:26:27 +0000 UTC]

Awesome XD I finally technically finished Chapter 3 just yesterday after half avoiding it and trying to get over my dislike of writing a part I initially find boring. But once I start writing I usually find it to be a lot more entertaining. It's usually my laziness/reluctance like that thay stops me from continuing almost all of the time.

Oh man, that sounds awesome. I love it when villains/antagonists show up the protag at every turn and are smart about it XD And no, you didn't mention that. I was like wait, what? Hm, so if he has multiple personalities, do they actually get in the way of stuff getting accomplished at times;

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-14 05:52:16 +0000 UTC]

he only has two personalities. the gentler more passive personality that he starts out with, and a much more passionate and aggressive personality. The passive personality has better control of his telekinesis, while the more agressive one can better utilize his future sight ability. the more one uses the other's power the greater the risk of switching control, which can be hazardous when in the middle of a fight.


The best writing advice I ever learned, and im not sure where i heard it or read it: "If it's boring to you, its boring to your readers." I keep this in mind always if a scene is boring i try to alter it in a way that will make it more entertaining while still getting across the plot cleanly. maybe set it in an interesting location so the reader has something pretty to imagine while the characters run through their paces, or add in some comedic animals/children where appropriate. 

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-14 21:29:35 +0000 UTC]

Hmm, whenever I hear about people making characters with split personalities, it always seems to be the passive and nice side versus the generally more angry/impulsive aggressive side. It makes me wonder if there's another way to write their personalities. It reminds me of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde that way though.

You have told me that before, but I always kind of forget it. I think the way I worked around that for my Chapter 3 was time skipping a bit, and making the interaction she had pretty short. I have a feeling I'll end up doing that in the next chapter, too (whenever I stop being lazy/distracted) lol.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-14 22:03:29 +0000 UTC]

While it may sound cliche on the surface neither side is inherently good, or evil. in fact the aggressive side gains control for a few years, without incident, but when the passive side finally surfaces again (due to the rival's planning) he loses his cool, and turns an entire lab complex upside-down.... literally.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-14 22:51:30 +0000 UTC]

Oh. Well, whenever I hear split/multiple personalities, a part of me always wonders/hopes that the character's personalities genuinely ARE different. As in, say, different likes and dislikes, fears, morals, friends, etc. That seems to be pretty dang hard to do though seriously, so whenever I see characters like its just like, oh, that's the nice side, and that's the "I'm gonna wreck your face" or jerk side. That isn't really a split personality to me. That's just like...split emotions. But I'm rambling again XP

I kinda wanna read that though, it's totally in the style/genre I enjoy writing in

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-15 01:32:38 +0000 UTC]

Part of the story is that both personalities think that they are truly different from the other, when in reality they just two halves of of the same person. At the moment im writing on my wolf story "Tamer." I'm considering posting it here if you're interested. its the written version of that 4 part comic i have.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-15 03:24:18 +0000 UTC]

Ah...just wondering, is the split personality thing a result of something in the story? Or does he like, legit have a mental illness there? ...Because he should he that treated lol.
Hmm, I'm pretty sure I've read that, but I don't think it'd be necessary to read it since I'm pretty sure you portrayed the thing without words (or at least most of it.)

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-15 14:38:33 +0000 UTC]

Oh no it continues the story in book form. not just the comic. and the split is caused by early childhood truama as a result of a lot of dying, and the researchers attempts to keep him under control. this backfires when he gets his hands on a sword made of unknown material that can augment itself based on the power of the one wielding it, but the full extent of that feature isn't discovered till later.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-15 19:11:58 +0000 UTC]

I'm gonna reread the comic later because I don't remember much.
Also...why would there be a lot of dying? Unless those researchers are like the Maximum Ride/not giving a f kind about their projects because there's so many. Lol. Now I'm wondering why there's that sword of unknown material when it sounds like the story is in a contemporary setting?

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-15 22:03:57 +0000 UTC]

seems out of place huh? but when you can stop bullets and fly around using telekinesis you can use any kind of weapon you want. and really there's only one signficant death, but it serves to drive the two personalities further apart, its an attempt at mind control that breaks him in two to begin with. plus with his power, the sword is more dangerous than any gun.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-16 05:28:14 +0000 UTC]

But wait, but if he has telekinesis that powerful why would he need a sword in the first place? Ever see the movie Chronicle? Or Akira? They own with telekinesis lol. You wouldn't even need a gun or a powerful sword, since your mind/power would be so strong.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-16 06:43:26 +0000 UTC]

..... Swords are cool. I haven't seen akira, but i need to. I have seen chronicle. it's mainly the more active personality that starts using the sword, because if he uses telekinesis too much control would switch to the passive personality. He can still do little things with it without risking a transfer though. when the two merge again He's able to use the sword to amplify his power and pretty much fire invisible laser beams out of the sword. later he's able to manifest tons of flying copies of the sword. it gets pretty awesome.

and before you go saying he's Op there's another girl who has absolute control over fire, and eventually is able to turn into fire herself, negating any injuries she may receive, one of the villain's has the power to copy other powers, and he get's Phil's invincibility thing.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-16 07:23:08 +0000 UTC]

You really do need to see Akira. It's incredible. My picture here is actually one of (if not the) main characters named Tetsuo. He's the guy with an inferiority complex that gets god-like telekinesis, while his friend/gang member Kaneda tries to stop him from going psycho. And shit gets real. Tell me what you think of the ending because...there are no words.
Also Chronicle was awesome and one of my favorite live action movies. They need to make that freakin' sequel. But they keep having script problems according to wikipedia.

Okay lol, that's better. So there's a lot of insanely powerful people. Does anyone ever think to trying bombing or nuking any of them? (It's the only way to be sure.) XD

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-16 16:13:57 +0000 UTC]

The girl get's the ability to become fire by eating a nuclear explosion. as a general rule, the more you use a power the more powerful it becomes, periodically evolving into something different. but in the case of the guy who can steal powers the stolen powers remain at the level they were forever, and he cannot absorb the same person's power twice.


Also I guess Racada's parents end up being villains for a time, and he can't hurt them for obvious reasons. 


I'll see if one of my friends has Akira, if not I'll have to find it online.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-16 23:01:21 +0000 UTC]

Ah. That's a cool rule for the guy who steals powers. There should be a time where he would try waiting for a certain person's power to get stronger before taking it. Either that or he plans to do so.

He has parents? That become villains? Dang it, you should just tell me the story in a note or something because it sounds cool lol.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-17 00:07:30 +0000 UTC]

that part is probably in book two, oh and i haven't even told you about the extremely confusing other part of the story that involves Dragons from another planet.


unfortunately for that guy he steals Racada's powers when he's young, before he realizes that he can only do it once.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-17 06:25:49 +0000 UTC]

Ohh......What? That kind of sound like that doesn't belong there lol.


Ah...What were all of Racada's powers again? Lol, I'm not too sure now.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-17 13:51:21 +0000 UTC]

Future sight (2 seconds maximum) telekinesis, and then the third is a soecial morph power that doesn't activate until he's 16.


Yeah it seems like that doesn't it? this series is sort of my daydreams put down on paper so there are a few thins like that. but for the most part i keep them n their respective worlds. expect for the fact that a character named Alice from earth is interplanetary pen-pals with a dragon on the other planet.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-17 21:00:14 +0000 UTC]

Well, I imagine that he's over 16 for the majority of the story? And wait...the villain gets all those powers? And more? O.o

That doesn't sound like it'd be very plot-relevant then, honestly. Just thay they'd be telling each other stuff.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-18 04:21:18 +0000 UTC]

the pen pal thing is more relevant in the dragon's book. it's only breifly mentioned that she has a pen pal in this one. and Yeah, overpowered villains for overpowered heros.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-18 07:48:34 +0000 UTC]

You wrote a book for the dragon/dragon's world, too? How many books did you actually write? (Or at least plan to.)
I must wonder again where are teh nukes to stop them XP Actually, why aren't nukes used in things like the Avengers now O.o Though, I guess it wouldn't exactly do much to some of them...

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-18 16:26:58 +0000 UTC]

They did use a nuke in the avengers. Tony Stark through it into outer space remember? and yeah, the two were originally one story, but i decided to split them because the dragon world has a books worth of stuff on its own.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-19 00:31:08 +0000 UTC]

Oh right...I thought that was the portal generator though? I'm not actually sure though since I haven't seen the whole thing in a while. I DO remember that the use of a nuke was being threatened by Nick Fury's higher-ups and he repeatedly was telling them to calm down and wait a minute lol. Ah. Have you actually written them or just planned it out in your head?

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-19 03:10:45 +0000 UTC]

just planned out. my attention is currently focused on NR and Tamer. Would you like me to post those chapters though? they cotinue the comic as well as add in things i wasn't able to illustrate.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-19 09:09:24 +0000 UTC]

Aww, I'd totally read that XP
For some reason I just read the prologue of Tamer you already put up instead of just rereading the comic lol, and I realized that you already wrote out the comic there. The main thing I'm wondering is if it will all be from the pup's perspective since I find it slightly odd, 'though I have actually read a book that was half from a dog who's never seen human's perspective and half from the view of the human boy who wound up trapped on island of dogs (and their war/fight for survival against...I don't even remember what they were.)
Also I'm wondering/hoping that at least some chapters would be from the boy's perspective, so I'd actually know who he is/how he got there/what's going on and all that stuffs

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-19 15:15:28 +0000 UTC]

the perspective is usually from the female protagonist whom you have yet to meet. The boy trys his best to remain a mystery throughout the story, and reveals his past through flashbacks brought on by her inquiring about him. I need to change some things in the first chapter before i can post it. something involving ungrateful horse deaths and postmortem characterization gone awry. then other than the fact that i have way too many proper nouns in the first chapter im sure it will be good to go.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-21 05:43:05 +0000 UTC]

Why does he "try to remain a mystery?" Sorry it just sounds a little odd. Unless he like, did something terrible/important beforehand. (I can't help thinking of YA "romance" books where the guy is always "mysterious" because he's some paranormal/supernatural creature now though. Blagh.)
And...what about ungrateful horse deaths and post-mortem characterization? O.o

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-21 16:54:39 +0000 UTC]

He keeps secrets from her because he likes her, and does't want her to think he's weird and hate him. little does he know she thinks he's weird the moment they meet. another reason is that other people he's tried to tell about his past (in towns and villages mainly) never believed him, and usually kicked him out. and he's not some super magical creature, though he is a talented magic user which isn't a shameful profession in this world. but there are some really juicy secret that he keeps even from himself.


As for the horse, in an attempt to get across how stupid the horse is I have a character comment on how stupid the horse was after it dies, which makes that character seem really unlikable.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-21 21:40:08 +0000 UTC]

Ah. I don't get why they'd kick him out but I guess that requires context.

I'm wondering why there's such a stupid horse but that kinda sounds funny lol. But if the horse really is that stupid, I don't see why the character would be unlikeable, because at least it isn't the ignorant jerk character who says that only because he doesn't know what it's thinking. Because apparently that horse really was dumb.

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-21 22:45:46 +0000 UTC]

Oh right, they kick him out because of Corzzan the wolf he travels with. There's a superstition that if you're killed by a desert wolf, they will also eat your soul and reincarnate you as a wolf. These superstitions are completely false, sort of. another reason is that the guy is acting against the will of the desert country's ruler because he avoided a military draft in his youth, and if he runs into anyone who knows about it they try to arrest him.


the stupid horse is my big juxtaposition joke. The female protagonist and her escort both ride horses. her's is this beautiful pure white stallion while his is this dirt brown mare. The pretty white one is mentally handicapped, and the brown one is smarter than a 5th grader. i'd say more but that would defeat the purpose of uploading the chapter which i will do soon.

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saphira2k5 In reply to ingmaster5 [2014-01-22 07:09:32 +0000 UTC]

Ohh, okay. That wolf myth sounds cool. And I figured that the boy would be working against the ruler, I think I've noticed that as a theme in your stories

Lol, that's pretty funny. I'll be waiting for that chapter but might not be able to read it so soon. College started up again this week :/

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ingmaster5 In reply to saphira2k5 [2014-01-22 14:22:34 +0000 UTC]

The story of the first book has very little to do with the desert country. Upon choosing to accompany the woman he reveals that he had been about to leave for good when they crossed paths. I use that wolf thing for a gag at the very end, and it's kind of hilarious if i do say so myself.


I'm in college too, I have some awesome professors this semester, but unfortunately I'm still quite lazy. I'll go edit that chapter and then write the speech that's due tomorrow. :\

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