Comments: 11
lost-mister-me [2003-12-10 03:55:01 +0000 UTC]
wow. lol. i dont know exactly what to tell you.
"She cried bloody tears of joy mixed with the ache of the knowledge of what would become of this. Her wounds would never heal, thus she danced until her demise on stage. The entire world would know of her beauty, her devotion, her passion. No one being would ever dance without whispering her name."
that whole part and the last part was great. since you said so, i read this one a few times very slow picking more out each time. and it seems to cry out many things at once.......hmm. you really did an EXCELLENT job on this one. its just so descriptive and vivid. always in few words you say so much. this is probably one of your best and better than all of mine and i think im gonna have to +fav this one too lol. hmmm. i said i didnt know what to tell you, but it looks like i did. it made me think a lot. amazing piece mary....simply amazing.
+fav.
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saro-n-mizary In reply to lost-mister-me [2003-12-10 21:28:59 +0000 UTC]
thank you very much for your insights
as always it means alot
and your fav is always amazing to me
when i wrote this
the first thing i wanted was for everyone to read it
...so that maybe i can understand people more...so i know what others really think...
thank you so much for reading
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riistar [2003-12-10 02:52:38 +0000 UTC]
A modern cry that turns to a diminishing whisper, ushered towards the blackness, hands plam up... Pleding, and in those last moments not wanting to be forgotten, to leave your mark, to depart in a manner that is almost fitting to those who view... Your mind is what you think, but your heart is what you desire...
Brilliant, its jarring, raw; and shocks the reader into a heartfelt sorrow brought about by those chilling last words...
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morbidsoul [2003-12-10 02:35:34 +0000 UTC]
This is really pretty and sad, I like it (though I know nothing about writing).
The end, specifically, is beautiful.
Makes me wish I could write.
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saro-n-mizary In reply to morbidsoul [2003-12-10 02:41:48 +0000 UTC]
I bet you can write
if you really want to...just do it...
trust me you may be surprised
i promise, it's like drawing...just with words
i dont know much about writing myself
things just come to me
thank you mucho much for the comment
it means alot
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saro-n-mizary In reply to vespera [2003-12-10 02:36:06 +0000 UTC]
The last line...yea..it's not mine it's from bon jovi's Love me back to life
yea...but its the line that is supposed to show you to my frame of mine
to what i was trying to refer to
what my "dance" is...
btw...yea dancing is alot like writing
that's is why i love it
even though im no good at it
tkd is also like writing too...
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vespera In reply to saro-n-mizary [2003-12-10 09:01:04 +0000 UTC]
I think music is a lot like writing...
oh wait
they write lyrics for music....
*wanders off*
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