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Shadow-Fox168 — Power
Published: 2013-05-20 16:12:50 +0000 UTC; Views: 416; Favourites: 6; Downloads: 0
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Description
PowerShe lies beneath humanity's mortal understanding
Bending mortals into those who crave their every whim and desire.
Her whispers entail destruction by unconscious action to
Those who abuse her blessings. She considers them unworthy.
But there are those who seek her, not for personal pleasure but
For solidifying a philosophy they consider moral and true.
But will their words be put into action? She challenges all,
Whose actions firmly testify their beliefs.
A cruel temptress yet a benevolent giver, she tests all..
Centuries pass, yet those who were granted her blessings
Succumb to an even worse fate, only time will dictate
On who will be given her full benevolence.
Comments: 6
A truthful and indeed powerful poem. I do wonder why you decided to italicize it, but that's less important to me than the content itself. You hit power spot on -- I like how you personified "her," gave her a sense of humanity. Really nice.
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I don't give a sh*t what your italics or font or any of that go ahead and claim your way.... this is a powerful piece, this is your soul speaking. Let me read one poem by any author, for their words speak their core selves. A portal to the unconscious or the conscious, it is plain and clear. Love how you molded her as seeing the abusers unworthy - that she had blessings to give, yes even that was ominous, revealing your own - experiences, the hopes that were smashed to pieces as life repeats itself until we learn to close that door, and look for another way forward. GOOD WORK, I really like this it is just ooozing with emotional intensity and power.
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Review for writers--club.
The general tone and form of the verse was interesting, and i liked that from the first line. But i wondered why you chose italics rather than normal font for typing. Italics and bold type usually suggest emphasis.
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Thank you for the critic. Usually I use the italics for aesthetic purposes...
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Interesting idea. Yes they do set it off nicely.
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Creepy.....but cool! It kind of reminds me of my poem "The Watcher".
Summer? Summer is just starting here.
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