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ArcaneHiddenMagic [2011-11-20 04:02:34 +0000 UTC]

So, for the passing exam at the end of the second semester (in order to pass the class, I forgot which one it was >.<) our teacher asked one question. The question was 'How are you going to convince me the desk in front of you is invisible? and we had to answer on a sheet of paper. Not feeling well that day, I simply answered 'What desk?'. I got a one hundred, while everyone else failed because they tried to hard with a ton of equations and other things. No joke, this is a true story.

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Mr-kit [2011-11-20 03:42:06 +0000 UTC]

So my friend's sister was sleeping and while she was asleep she said,"God, please pass the parmesean." True Story!

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Whispered-Time [2011-11-20 03:40:58 +0000 UTC]

SO LIEK ONE TIME DERE WAZ DIS GUY, RITE? SO LIEK, HIS NAME WAZ JACOB AND HE WAS SOOOO HOT AND I LUV HIM AND I TINK HE LUVZ ME 2, BUT HE WAZ TRYING 2 DATE DIS 1 GIRL NAMED BELLA, AND BELLA WAZ A TOTAL BYOTCH 2 HIM. HE JUST WANTED A CHANCE BUT SHE LIEKED DIS UGLY VAMPYRE NAMED EDWARD. MORE LIEK ED-TARD. HE WAZ SO DUMB AND UGLY AND LAME AND I HATE HIZ GUTS. AND DEN 1 DAY I TOLD JACOB DAT I LUV HIM AND HE SHOULD STOP TRYING 2 DATE BELLA B CUZ I AM TTLY BETTER DAN HER, AND HE DIDNT SAY N E TING BUT I TINK HE DIDNT NEED 2 B CUZ IT WUZ N HIZ EYEZ HOW MUCH HE LUVD ME. AND I TINK HE TTLY FELL FOR ME AND I LIEK HIM 2 AND I TINK WE'LL DATE SOON B CUZ HE IZ SO HOT AND WUD B LIEK DA BEST BOYFREND EVAR!!!!!1!!1!!11111!11!!!!!ONE!1! AND LIEK HE IZ SOOOOO CUTE AND HE WUD NEVER EVER LUV N E 1 BUT ME B CUZ HE KNOWZ I AM SO B-U-T-FUL AND SMARTZ AND STUFFS. SO LIEK YEAH.

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StillBurning [2011-11-20 03:07:27 +0000 UTC]

Well I was in my locker room and randomly the principal starts to yell at us through the intercom to get out of our school because it could explode. Well I was half dressed so I had to run out of my locker room in my bra and underwear well lets just say I was the only one to do this so while we were wait outside I was frozen because it was winter. The boys kept whistling at me too. It was a false alarm though great. Lets just say if this happens again im changing first.

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StarScarredVixen [2011-11-20 03:07:11 +0000 UTC]

While I was at dinner tonight, my family and a few friends of mine were sitting at dinner and we began talking about gauges. Well, my mother was listening in and had this puzzled look on her face. After a while, she got this look of realization on her face and said, "Oh. Gauges! I thought you were talking about Gay-jins and I thought, 'Huh....Is that the name for gay Cajuns?'"

I nearly choked on my chimichanga I was laughing so hard.

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Saldemonium [2011-11-20 02:54:48 +0000 UTC]

My friends son was about five, when a tree fell on the house in a storm. She had people out the next day to fix it, and when Donald saw the first guy get out of the truck, well, he /had/ to be Bob the Builder! And so the second person, despite being a guy, had to be Wendy! This poor guy. My friend was upstairs to get something, and she could hear the guys on the roof though the window. 'Bob' was saying to the other guy, "Hey, hand me that hammer. Wendy." And when they were leaving, the older guy said goodbye to Donald and then turned to the younger guy and said: "Say goodbye. Wendy." That guy is still likely being called Wendy to this day. Hee.

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Finchya [2011-11-20 02:43:15 +0000 UTC]

This isn't just one event that happened, but rather a series of events that happened over a few months.

When my dog was a puppy, she wouldn't listen to us as much and she often got out of the house to run around the neighborhood. One of our neighbors has a golden retriever, which they sometimes had out tied up on a chain. Whenever my dog got out, she would go over to this golden retriever, and stay right out of reach of the retriever. It was like she was mocking the other dog. Keep in mind that my dog is this little miniature dachshund, that wouldn't have stood a chance against most other dogs.
Soon, these same neighbors got a german shepherd, and an electric fence for both of their dogs.
This time, whenever my dog got out, she would stay right out of the electric fence's boundaries, taunting both of the dogs.
One day, the german shepherd got fed up, said "Screw it," and ran right through the electric fence to get to my dog. She ended up getting chased all the way back to our house, with the german shepherd growling at her right behind.
Luckily neither dog was seriously hurt, but I dare say my dog has learned her lesson.

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BlackHeart1297 [2011-11-20 02:42:41 +0000 UTC]

So, in 6th grade at Waldo(I' actually a JGEMER) my friend Cordell pulled my hair, so I pretended I was really angry and he took off sprinting down the hallway, and when he looked back to see where I was (walking like 50 feet behind him), and he turned back around, still sprinting, and smacked into the open gym door, then, instead of saying "ow like a normall person, he rolled on the floor laughling It is really entertaining to go to school with psycho maniacs XD

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Blazeflight1O1 [2011-11-20 02:39:50 +0000 UTC]

My Performing Arts teacher told us a story. They had just moved into a new house, and of course when they got there, his little son turned on the TV and it was "Worldwide Day of Play". Then they went to the store, when they came back, with the TV still on, the TV said as the kid got closer 'We're outside playing! And you should be too!' and the kid turned around to play. When my teacher asked him where he was going, he said "The TV told me to go outside and play".

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xXHappyRainbowXx [2011-11-20 02:23:54 +0000 UTC]

Once upon a time.... (actually, it's a true story)

I was running outside for something, and checked to see if the screen was there. It wasn't. So, I got whatever it was, and ran back into my house. I finished using it, and ran it back outside. except this time, I didn't check for the screen....and my brother had closed it like 15 seconds before I ran, full-on, face-first into it. then, he stood there, looking at me, and said," You're face looks like a waffle." XD

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kyoopa [2011-11-20 02:18:54 +0000 UTC]

Once these three drunk guys are driving down the street when they see a gnome and put in in the closet.When they go back in the closet when they are sober they see the gnome is actually a little child!

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Ramenli [2011-11-20 02:08:20 +0000 UTC]

Your face.

U mad bro?

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Hydras-girl [2011-11-20 02:07:33 +0000 UTC]

Okay, a few weeks ago I was hanging out with some of my friends (Who are mostly guys)

One of them who was sitting next to me suddenly turned to me and said, "You smell nice, what is that smell? Lavender?"

To which I replied, "It's men's deodorant."

Brandon went wide eyed, turned to the seat behind us and said, "Hey! Smell her!"

My other friend gave him a weird look and asked, "Why?"

"Cause she smells nice! Just do it!" The first friend said.

This resulted in the other one sniffing me, and saying,"Your right, she does smell nice."

Seriously, the most awkward moment of my life.

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aqua9870 [2011-11-20 02:04:09 +0000 UTC]

Okay this happened a few days ago~

My friends and I were sitting at the lunch table. Okay so this really "dirty minded" kid comes to sit at our table. We don't like him because he is so dirty and annoying. But it usually is funny when he is there. So he sat next to me and I kept telling him to move, but he wouldn't. So I was sitting there complaining, and then suddenly out of nowhere a tray with trash and a full strawberry milk bottle with its cap off comes flying towards us on the table. It stopped right in front of him and poured milk all over him! I laughed my head off and said "See, I told you, you should have moved!"

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LoblollyPine [2011-11-20 02:01:39 +0000 UTC]

Over the summer my brother picked up a bright red motor scooter and was riding it around our cul-de-sac to a song by Queen when out dad came out and told him to stop "acting so gay". So to spite him, my 6-foot-2 brother put a child-sized helmet on the back of his head, strapped it under his nose, and rode the scooter around in circles to "The Safety Dance" by Men Without Hats.

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Ithinkurqreat [2011-11-20 02:00:23 +0000 UTC]

me and my friend were walking into my house and talking and then I heard this big bang and my friend had crashed into the door, then, since I was looking at her, I crashed into the brick wall on the outside of my house. We were sunburnt too so it rlly hurt and our faces were bright red AND bruised at school the next day

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iceiline [2011-11-20 01:56:02 +0000 UTC]

oh btw all that on my lst happened today so combine it into one big lump kay?

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trustinparanoia [2011-11-20 01:54:23 +0000 UTC]

When I was in elementary school, my friends and I all went through various phases of what we wanted to be. My friend Isabel wanted to be a pirate, and would compile every shiny object in her house into a box under her bed. My friend Elizabeth wanted to be a mermaid, but now she's deathly afraid of water. My friend Greer wanted to be a hippy, and deemed herself "Sunshine Manatee" as a hippy name. And me? I wanted to be a hermit. I wanted to live in a cave on my own in the wilderness, live off the land, and be a hermit. Nobody believes me, but all of my friends remember my hermit phase. It was a wonderful time of my life

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Zeldagirl1995 [2011-11-20 01:53:21 +0000 UTC]

One time while my family was out on errands, we stopped by Sheridan's for some frozen custard.

My little sister had never heard the word Custard before, so while we were talking about how much we liked custard, she gave us all a weird look and asked, "We're eating chocolate mustard?"

It was adorable.

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iceiline [2011-11-20 01:50:11 +0000 UTC]

1)i was sitting at home at around like 3am and my computer started to tip over and it hit me smack in the face i went to school with a mark on my forehead now i have a fight with mr. computer screen

2) i got lost in my closet about 20 times by now also my house i got lost in my house about 40 times

3) today i was stnading up and i randomly slipped on air and fell UP a down escalator it never stopped and people had to stop it in order to get me off, it took about an hour until people noticed it was for realz

4) i dropped my phone and it bounced back up and hit my face

yup i think that's all for now and yes these are all 100% true as weird as they sound

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Silverheart-chan [2011-11-20 01:50:06 +0000 UTC]

this just happen, so it starts with my friend using his lazer pointer on the tv and then he said can anybody see it. every body did but this girl. then a guy made a remake saying u should get ur eyes checked. then she replied "i'll get my classes" and everyone bursted out laughing for the failed comment.

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f-u-t-a-r-o [2011-11-20 01:49:48 +0000 UTC]

I went to the beach last summer, and we all went outside onto the balcony. I got annoyed and was like 8I I'm going inside, and then I smashed into the glass door because I thought it was open.

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s7rip3s [2011-11-20 01:49:38 +0000 UTC]

a man and a vacuum died when the man used his vacuum cleaner inappropriately/ as a sex toy
he got electrocuted when the jizz entered the vaccuum (if he'd done that previous to that i'd feel sorry or anyone who borrowed the vaccuum )

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Firkasa [2011-11-20 01:49:11 +0000 UTC]

My relatives owned a pomeranian named Puppy (yeah, creative name, I know).

My aunt came home one day with a sausage and pepperoni pizza and set it on the dining table. Suddenly the phone rang and she went off to go answer it. After 20 min she returned to the dining room and checked the pizza. When she opened the box all of the meat from the pizza had disappeared! Perplexed, she went around the house trying to figure out what happened since no one else was at home. Finally, she spotted Puppy lounging to the side... with pizza sauce all over her muzzle. Apparently, she jumped onto the table, opened the pizza box, stuffed her face with meat, CLOSED the pizza box, and went on her merry way.

GOOD JOB PUPPY.

This has actually happened at my own house too. She also tried to eat some noodles left on the table meant for my dinner. I ended up catching her in the middle of the act. Apparently, noodles aren't very tasty... spoiled princess. D:<

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StephenKingFTW [2011-11-20 01:47:41 +0000 UTC]

I was at an 8th grade musical last night, and at the afterparty, one of the guys who played the demigod of Papa Ge (the god of death) came up to the library with his friend, looked over the rail, and said "And this is where we can jump off to kill ourselves..." ((Funny because of irony, not because of suicide... >_>))

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RebelStarwarrior [2011-11-20 01:45:26 +0000 UTC]

On halloween, some teenage boy dressed as a devil jumped out of a bush in front of as kid dressed as a priest. He was trying to scare the kid. Without skipping a beat, the little priest hit the devil with his bible, screamed "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU" and started chasing him around.

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StellarStella [2011-11-20 01:43:36 +0000 UTC]

One of my really good friends is extremely good at math, and is extremely good at science. He and I both tried out for a science team at my school. Math is his strong point, and science is my strong point. But he is still really good at science. Anyways, when the results of the test came in, everybody was shocked to see that my friend didn't make it in. We never brought up the topic when we were around him because we were afraid of hurting his feelings. A few days ago, the after-school specialist called him up to the podium. She asked him if he could read something on the bottom of a scan tron. (Those multiple choice bubble sheet things) It turns out that he got into the team, but nobody could read the name of the paper. ^-^

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DancingWithDreams [2011-11-20 01:41:56 +0000 UTC]

I heard a story from a friend about this kid who was 6'3 got hit by a prius the end its a true story <3333

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Illusion-Kat [2011-11-20 01:41:30 +0000 UTC]

Sometime this week, I took a shower. After I was done the shower, I was happy I was done with it, but then the soap bar slid off the soapholder and over my feet. OTL

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PsychicCupid [2011-11-20 01:41:07 +0000 UTC]

I was once watching a debate between two little girls. One girl had taken something from the other- after the other had given her permission -but the other girl didn't either remember/or actually didn't/ give her permission. Now, keep in mind these are little girls. So one says to the other... "YOU GAVE ME THIS! THAT MEANS IT'S MINE!! THE LAW IS ON MY SIDE!!!" and everybody around started laughing it was so cute!

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Luteshi [2011-11-20 01:40:26 +0000 UTC]

D'aw, she's so pretty! Too bad I don't have any funny stories~
Well, good luck to everyone and congratz to whoever wins! ^^

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