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Chapter 37-The First Time Sakura Fell In Love With Kakashi

Kakashi brought his fingers to the top edges of his mask and knowing what he was about to do, I lowered my hands from the sides of his face and placed them patiently on my lap instead.

With his back turned away from everybody else so that nobody but I could see, he began to lower the thin barrier of fabric down from his face, slowly revealing himself to me.

First, came the straight bridge of his nose and the tops of his cheeks where I could see more of the scar that bisected his left eye. Then, the tip of his pointed nose, his hairless upper lip, followed by his thin, smooth lips. Last was his chin and jaw, angular and masculine and cleanly shaved.

I paused for a moment, letting it all sink in.

This was my first time really seeing his face: Not a hazy blur as he suddenly pushed me up against a wall and ravished me senseless on New Year's Day, or in darkness as we slow danced atop Hokage Monument beneath a starry night sky, or in dim moonlight or early breaking dawn as we made love to each other over and over again. Nothing compared to how I saw Kakashi's face now...in broad daylight.

I slowly traced the pads of my fingers against the outlines of his face, feeling like I was seeing him for the first time, like I was looking into the face of a stranger. I cupped his left cheek in my hand, skin to skin this time, and gently caressed the scar that ran the better length of it, carefully rubbing my thumb back and forth against the discolored line of flesh. Rather than mar his features, it only seemed to add to them, making him look formidable in the face of enemies, yet human and vulnerable to the few people who knew him best, people like myself.

He put a gloved hand to the left side of my own face and gently caressed my cheek with his thumb the way I was caressing his. His eye met mine and with just that one look, I knew what he wanted. His body slowly leaned in towards mine and I let my eyes slowly slide shut as I felt the distance between us lessen and lessen until it had completely disappeared. I felt rather than saw his lips press against mine, soft, smooth, and warm. They nudged at my own again and again, wordlessly enticing me to participate, so I did. Pressing and nudging my own lips against his, everything and everyone else faded into nothingness. The only thing that took precedence was how this touch, this simple, but intimate touch of our lips made us feel. It made our bodies burn more than should be allowed considering where we were and who was around us. It made our minds numb, voiding us of all thought and giving our bodies up to primal instinct. It readied them for something we couldn't do at this current place and time, but the memory of this moment would fire us up again when we were finally alone in a guest bedroom somewhere in Suna.

Reluctantly, Kakashi slowly pulled away from me and pressed his forehead against mine, still gently caressing my cheek with his thumb. I smiled with my eyes still closed, and let my thumb do the same for him.

"You know, there was a time in my life when I thought that this was all impossible." I murmured. "And it wasn't just because you're much older than me or used to be my teacher, but because you had never really paid any attention to me. You always focused on the boys first, and as far as our relationship went, it didn't really exist. I was...invisible." I said, the last part ending on a sadder note than I had intended, but Kakashi had caught onto it and he pulled away from me to look me in the eyes.

"Sakura, I'm so sorry. The last thing I ever wanted to do was to make you feel that way!"

"It's okay, Kakashi. I understand. The boys needed you more than I did. Sasuke needed you because you were the only person who could teach him how to use his Sharingan and Naruto needed you because only you could teach him things that the rest of us couldn't possibly handle, our not being a Jinchuuriki like him."

"It's still no excuse for how I treated you. No one should ever be made to feel invisible."

"But Kakashi, that's what I'm trying to say: you've more than made up for it! What we have now goes beyond the simple teacher/student relationship you had with Sasuke and Naruto. You're my best friend, my boyfriend, my fiance, and my lover. Our relationship is so much more intimate and I don't just mean physically. What we have is so much better!"

Kakashi smiled at me and for a second I was taken aback. I saw straight, white teeth and lips raised up at the corners. I saw smile creases indenting his cheeks...I saw the whole picture.

My own lips upturned into a smile and then, I was laughing. Not just a happy "I've finally seen your face when you smile!" kind of laugh, but a hysterical "I don't know why I think it's so funny, but I just can't stop laughing!" kind of laugh.

The smile on Kakashi's own face gave way to concern and confusion.

"Sakura...what's so funny?"

But the look on his face just made me laugh even more.

"You...Hahaha!...Have...Hehehe...The worst...Hahaha!...Tan-line I've ever seen!" I said in a rush and then burst out laughing again. "You look like Zetsu only the line running across your face goes the other way!" I said hysterically.

Kakashi raised one eyebrow up at me which made the tan-line do a weird angle. I stared at it and then started laughing even harder.

Off in the distance, Naruto and everyone else started to look our way.

"You're too easily amused." Kakashi said dryly. "It's usually not this bad. It's just that we've been under the heat of the sun a lot lately," he said, quickly raising his mask back up to his face so that there was no risk of anyone else seeing it.

With it covered back up, I was able to get a hold of myself better even though a few giggles still escaped me every now and then.

"Are you finished?" Kakashi asked impatiently.

Somehow I think I hurt his feelings by laughing at his face, literally.

"I'm so sorry, Kakashi! I didn't mean to laugh at you! I don't know what came over me! It's just that as far as bets went as to what your face looked like beneath that mask, we've had everything from buckteeth to fish lips, but 'bad tan-line,' the most simple and obvious thing, never made it on that list!" I said with a big smile, but made sure not to laugh again.

"Oh, okay..." he said, but he still didn't seem convinced.

"Kakashi," I said, bringing my hand back up to his cheek so that he'd turn my way, "You're not mad at me are you?"

"No, of course not." Kakashi smiled a small smile at me.

"You are!" I said in surprise.

"Not mad, Sakura. It's just...I don't show my face to just anybody and when I showed you, you thought it was the funniest thing in the world."

"Kakashi, of all the people to have a complex about his looks, you are the last person who should have one! I'm just lucky you wear that mask all the time or I'd be in for some major competition, at least more than there already is. And I couldn't help the way I reacted. The tan-line looked funny, so I laughed. I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing at it." But in truth, I knew where he was coming from. How many times had I been made fun of because of my big forehead? And even though I knew people were commenting about it and not me as a person, I couldn't help but take offense because it was a part of me and therefore, what they were making fun of was me.

"Listen," I said gently, "You don't ever have to worry about me not accepting you. I loved you the instant you showed up at the first Chuunin exam and saved me from those two Sound ninjas who tried to attack me. I didn't know what you looked liked then and it didn't matter. All that mattered was that you were there to protect me and make me feel safe. That's what counted then, that's what counts now, and that's why I agreed to marry you: the fact that I know you'll always be there for me no matter what."

Kakashi smiled a genuine smile this time and leaned in towards me to give me another kiss.

When I felt the pressure of his lips leave mine, I opened my eyes and saw him beginning to stand up, reaching his hand out and offering it to me. I placed my hand into his and let him help me stand up.

Now standing side by side, we both looked out into the distance where, in the shimmer of a heat wave, we could make out Naruto, Yamato, Madam Shijimi, Hiraku, and Shinri talking in the shade of a small cluster of desert trees. Just looking at them made me feel nervous, guilty, and excited all at the same time about the news I - we - were about to tell them.

"Are you ready?" Kakashi asked softly beside me.

"Not really." I admitted.

"Don't worry, I'll be right here at your side," he said, and as if to emphasize the point, he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pressed me against his side.

I smiled up at him because, after all, he had just proven my point once again without him even knowing it. And slowly we began to walk, making our way towards the small crowd.

To be continued...

Description
Chapter 37-The First Time Sakura Fell In Love With Kakashi

Kakashi brought his fingers to the top edges of his mask and knowing what he was about to do, I lowered my hands from the sides of his face and placed them patiently on my lap instead.

With his back turned away from everybody else so that nobody but I could see, he began to lower the thin barrier of fabric down from his face, slowly revealing himself to me.

First, came the straight bridge of his nose and the tops of his cheeks where I could see more of the scar that bisected his left eye. Then, the tip of his pointed nose, his hairless upper lip, followed by his thin, smooth lips. Last was his chin and jaw, angular and masculine and cleanly shaved.

I paused for a moment, letting it all sink in.

This was my first time really seeing his face: Not a hazy blur as he suddenly pushed me up against a wall and ravished me senseless on New Year's Day, or in darkness as we slow danced atop Hokage Monument beneath a starry night sky, or in dim moonlight or early breaking dawn as we made love to each other over and over again. Nothing compared to how I saw Kakashi's face now...in broad daylight.

I slowly traced the pads of my fingers against the outlines of his face, feeling like I was seeing him for the first time, like I was looking into the face of a stranger. I cupped his left cheek in my hand, skin to skin this time, and gently caressed the scar that ran the better length of it, carefully rubbing my thumb back and forth against the discolored line of flesh. Rather than mar his features, it only seemed to add to them, making him look formidable in the face of enemies, yet human and vulnerable to the few people who knew him best, people like myself.

He put a gloved hand to the left side of my own face and gently caressed my cheek with his thumb the way I was caressing his. His eye met mine and with just that one look, I knew what he wanted. His body slowly leaned in towards mine and I let my eyes slowly slide shut as I felt the distance between us lessen and lessen until it had completely disappeared. I felt rather than saw his lips press against mine, soft, smooth, and warm. They nudged at my own again and again, wordlessly enticing me to participate, so I did. Pressing and nudging my own lips against his, everything and everyone else faded into nothingness. The only thing that took precedence was how this touch, this simple, but intimate touch of our lips made us feel. It made our bodies burn more than should be allowed considering where we were and who was around us. It made our minds numb, voiding us of all thought and giving our bodies up to primal instinct. It readied them for something we couldn't do at this current place and time, but the memory of this moment would fire us up again when we were finally alone in a guest bedroom somewhere in Suna.

Reluctantly, Kakashi slowly pulled away from me and pressed his forehead against mine, still gently caressing my cheek with his thumb. I smiled with my eyes still closed, and let my thumb do the same for him.

"You know, there was a time in my life when I thought that this was all impossible." I murmured. "And it wasn't just because you're much older than me or used to be my teacher, but because you had never really paid any attention to me. You always focused on the boys first, and as far as our relationship went, it didn't really exist. I was...invisible." I said, the last part ending on a sadder note than I had intended, but Kakashi had caught onto it and he pulled away from me to look me in the eyes.

"Sakura, I'm so sorry. The last thing I ever wanted to do was to make you feel that way!"

"It's okay, Kakashi. I understand. The boys needed you more than I did. Sasuke needed you because you were the only person who could teach him how to use his Sharingan and Naruto needed you because only you could teach him things that the rest of us couldn't possibly handle, our not being a Jinchuuriki like him."

"It's still no excuse for how I treated you. No one should ever be made to feel invisible."

"But Kakashi, that's what I'm trying to say: you've more than made up for it! What we have now goes beyond the simple teacher/student relationship you had with Sasuke and Naruto. You're my best friend, my boyfriend, my fiance, and my lover. Our relationship is so much more intimate and I don't just mean physically. What we have is so much better!"

Kakashi smiled at me and for a second I was taken aback. I saw straight, white teeth and lips raised up at the corners. I saw smile creases indenting his cheeks...I saw the whole picture.

My own lips upturned into a smile and then, I was laughing. Not just a happy "I've finally seen your face when you smile!" kind of laugh, but a hysterical "I don't know why I think it's so funny, but I just can't stop laughing!" kind of laugh.

The smile on Kakashi's own face gave way to concern and confusion.

"Sakura...what's so funny?"

But the look on his face just made me laugh even more.

"You...Hahaha!...Have...Hehehe...The worst...Hahaha!...Tan-line I've ever seen!" I said in a rush and then burst out laughing again. "You look like Zetsu only the line running across your face goes the other way!" I said hysterically.

Kakashi raised one eyebrow up at me which made the tan-line do a weird angle. I stared at it and then started laughing even harder.

Off in the distance, Naruto and everyone else started to look our way.

"You're too easily amused." Kakashi said dryly. "It's usually not this bad. It's just that we've been under the heat of the sun a lot lately," he said, quickly raising his mask back up to his face so that there was no risk of anyone else seeing it.

With it covered back up, I was able to get a hold of myself better even though a few giggles still escaped me every now and then.

"Are you finished?" Kakashi asked impatiently.

Somehow I think I hurt his feelings by laughing at his face, literally.

"I'm so sorry, Kakashi! I didn't mean to laugh at you! I don't know what came over me! It's just that as far as bets went as to what your face looked like beneath that mask, we've had everything from buckteeth to fish lips, but 'bad tan-line,' the most simple and obvious thing, never made it on that list!" I said with a big smile, but made sure not to laugh again.

"Oh, okay..." he said, but he still didn't seem convinced.

"Kakashi," I said, bringing my hand back up to his cheek so that he'd turn my way, "You're not mad at me are you?"

"No, of course not." Kakashi smiled a small smile at me.

"You are!" I said in surprise.

"Not mad, Sakura. It's just...I don't show my face to just anybody and when I showed you, you thought it was the funniest thing in the world."

"Kakashi, of all the people to have a complex about his looks, you are the last person who should have one! I'm just lucky you wear that mask all the time or I'd be in for some major competition, at least more than there already is. And I couldn't help the way I reacted. The tan-line looked funny, so I laughed. I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing at it." But in truth, I knew where he was coming from. How many times had I been made fun of because of my big forehead? And even though I knew people were commenting about it and not me as a person, I couldn't help but take offense because it was a part of me and therefore, what they were making fun of was me.

"Listen," I said gently, "You don't ever have to worry about me not accepting you. I loved you the instant you showed up at the first Chuunin exam and saved me from those two Sound ninjas who tried to attack me. I didn't know what you looked liked then and it didn't matter. All that mattered was that you were there to protect me and make me feel safe. That's what counted then, that's what counts now, and that's why I agreed to marry you: the fact that I know you'll always be there for me no matter what."

Kakashi smiled a genuine smile this time and leaned in towards me to give me another kiss.

When I felt the pressure of his lips leave mine, I opened my eyes and saw him beginning to stand up, reaching his hand out and offering it to me. I placed my hand into his and let him help me stand up.

Now standing side by side, we both looked out into the distance where, in the shimmer of a heat wave, we could make out Naruto, Yamato, Madam Shijimi, Hiraku, and Shinri talking in the shade of a small cluster of desert trees. Just looking at them made me feel nervous, guilty, and excited all at the same time about the news I - we - were about to tell them.

"Are you ready?" Kakashi asked softly beside me.

"Not really." I admitted.

"Don't worry, I'll be right here at your side," he said, and as if to emphasize the point, he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pressed me against his side.

I smiled up at him because, after all, he had just proven my point once again without him even knowing it. And slowly we began to walk, making our way towards the small crowd.

To be continued...