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Description

Your problem is not that you lose control of yourself,

it’s that you take control of your partner.
In order to change,
you don’t need to gain control over yourself,
you need to let go of control of your partner.

Abuse grows from attitudes and values,
not feelings.
The roots are ownership,
the trunk is entitlement,
and the branches are control.

Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
Finished: 23.5.2018
Photoshop

I had read Bancroft's book a few years ago and it always held a place in my thoughts. Finally being able to get my hands on physical copy I gobbled it down like a hungry baby bird before handing it to the first of many who wanted to borrow it for a read. If you think you could benefit from knowing what goes on inside the minds of angry and controlling men (mostly men, yeah) I recommend getting the book. There's also a PDF you can read on my Google Drive if a copy isn't an option for you. The PDF isn't quite as easy to read but serves its purpose in delivering the text to you. drive.google.com/file/d/1EHnrQ…

The book really has occupied my thoughts and given me a lot of mental meat to work through, so I wanted to solidify a section of it visually. Bancroft described the abusive mindset through a tree comparison, but it could just as well be a person where the roots are his values and unbalanced sense of importance, the trunk is his feelings that are the result of those values and his hands become the outward-reaching tools of control he will use to confuse, manipulate, insult and beat his partner to the ground (literally, in some cases).

Not much of a masterpiece as I'm still trying to get over some weird art block that crept up on me after finishing the Zeraora picture, so bear with me.

Description

Your problem is not that you lose control of yourself,

it’s that you take control of your partner.
In order to change,
you don’t need to gain control over yourself,
you need to let go of control of your partner.

Abuse grows from attitudes and values,
not feelings.
The roots are ownership,
the trunk is entitlement,
and the branches are control.

Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
Finished: 23.5.2018
Photoshop

I had read Bancroft's book a few years ago and it always held a place in my thoughts. Finally being able to get my hands on physical copy I gobbled it down like a hungry baby bird before handing it to the first of many who wanted to borrow it for a read. If you think you could benefit from knowing what goes on inside the minds of angry and controlling men (mostly men, yeah) I recommend getting the book. There's also a PDF you can read on my Google Drive if a copy isn't an option for you. The PDF isn't quite as easy to read but serves its purpose in delivering the text to you. drive.google.com/file/d/1EHnrQ…

The book really has occupied my thoughts and given me a lot of mental meat to work through, so I wanted to solidify a section of it visually. Bancroft described the abusive mindset through a tree comparison, but it could just as well be a person where the roots are his values and unbalanced sense of importance, the trunk is his feelings that are the result of those values and his hands become the outward-reaching tools of control he will use to confuse, manipulate, insult and beat his partner to the ground (literally, in some cases).

Not much of a masterpiece as I'm still trying to get over some weird art block that crept up on me after finishing the Zeraora picture, so bear with me.