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Description
Barrowed Time

I looked up at the stars. They gleamed so bright, even for a clear July night they seemed brighter than normal. I listened to the swaying of the trees, how the twisted and weaved through the night breeze. I cleared my mind, easy on a night like this, but hard with such a stabbing memory. I glanced at the dancing willow tree and saw her face in the leaves. I put my attention back to the sky. A tear rolled down my cheek when I remembered star gazing with her when I was still young, she pointed out all the constellations, and then we made our own. I searched the sky, found it; Watchers Time was what we had named it because it looked like an eye at one angle and a clock at another. I remember I had thought it was the coolest thing and she thought that I was the cutest thing for thinking that. It almost like these memories can cancel out the tragedy that happened after; memories are the only thing that keeps me breathing, the only thing keeping her alive, alive in me. I sat up, my cheeks wet with tears, and I could almost hear her calling my name, to come inside because it was late. But I dare not go to bed, the nightmares would be the worst of ever, of course tomorrow was the day, the anniversary.

I walked on the wooden plank floor that lead into the kitchen, a sight I hadn't seen in years, not since I left. I looked up to see them smiling, holding hands. Perfect, nothing could ever go wrong, I remember this day, this was the day, the day that happened thirteen years ago.

"Akari sweetie, good morning, you're up early," mother said with a huge smile on her face.

"Good morning momma and papa! I was too excited to sleep, are we really gonna go on a vacation!" shouted the ever so happy innocent little me from the kitchen table.

"Yes cutie pie, but it's a surprise on where, okay?" The man I refuse to call my father replied. If only I knew then, the monster this man was. I could've expected this could've been ready for the pain, the huge change, and the loss.

"Really? Well is it an amusement park, a tropical island, are we going camping? At least give me a hint, please!" I felt bad because she wouldn't be going anywhere near that and in hours her world was shatter. I turned from the kitchen and walked down the hall again only to see a cracked door, I peeked in to see a shattered mirror and glass spread across the floor, I heard moms voice, though in a way I'd never heard it before, it was full of sorrow and yelling at my father. Then he started yelling back full of rage, I heard my mother's sobbing. I kicked the door open and ran in to grab her before it was too late, as if it would do anything, reverse the past, and make my childhood full of happy memories of my loving family. But no, that would never happen nothing I could do could ever save her. I stopped in my tracks and turned my head, full of fear, I didn't want to be reminded of what I saw through the crack in the door, but of course too late. She was already dead, and him the killer standing over his victim didn't even look sad, or upset, or confused, he looked relieved and that's what bothered me the most. He looked at me, now my invisibleness gone he grabbed my wrist and twisted my arm I yelped in pain and tried to kick him. He gripped tighter digging her finger nails into my flesh. I winced then drove my fist into his face; he lost his grip and staggered back. He picked up one of the glass shards from the floor he pointed it at me then lunged forward. I jumped to the side but the shard sliced through my arm and my blood streamed down my arm. I went to knock the glass from his hand when he tried to stab me with it, but I shot back, a little too far back because I hit a broken window. His twisted smile grew as he jumped at me and pushed me through, time seemed to stop as I fell out the third story window I saw my mom's face full of sadness I could never imagine her having, then bang!

I woke up screaming, again, no surprise it's the fifth time this week, the nightmares the same as always. I stepped out of my bed wiped the sweat of my forehead. After taking a shower and getting dressed I headed out to the town. I didn't feel like talking to anyone or anything I was just waiting for something, looking for someone, but I had no idea what. It's like the feeling in your gut when you know something's going to happen but you have no idea what, where, or when, but you're excited for it. I sat on a bench and cupped my head in my hands. I had a terrible headache, and I was trying not to think, because thinking could make me think of him, him rotting in a cell hundreds of miles away, him who calls himself my loving father, the man who tore my world to pieces and spit it back in my face. I felt a presence next to me and a firm hand on my shoulder; I didn't have to look up to know who it was.

"Akari, what's wrong?" Owen asked with a voice full of concern. I lifted my head to look at him and I gave a weak smile.

"Nothing's wrong, I just didn't sleep well last night," I half lied, the sleeping part was true.

"Oh, is there something you should tell me about, that's keeping you from sleeping, is something bothering you?"

"No, no, it's nothing, I've been up working to late, and that's all." I stood up ending the conversation and grabbed Owen's arm. "Let's go get some coffee." He stood up and we headed into the inn. Maya and Chase looked over at us from behind the counter, "Two coffees" I said and Maya nodded, she nudged Chase and he turned around and began grinding coffee beans.

"So I see you didn't get much sleep, was it the nightmares again-" Maya slapped her hand over her mouth and I glared at her, what an idiot it was supposed to be a secret, she was the only one who knew, I managed to keep it a secret for over ten years and now she spills the beans, great, now Owen was going to mad I lied to him and pry out the truth. Owen raised an eyebrow at me and I smiled a twisted half smile. How could I act natural when I was mad as ever?

"W-what are you talking about Maya?" My voice cracked, wonderful. Maya looked down and scooted her way out of the kitchen, she ran up the stairs, what was she doing? Trying to get away from me, did she think I was going to jump at her and strangle her, or what?
"I'll be right back Owen," I spoke, my voice harsh. I tried to look confused as I walked up the stairs, maybe Owen will think Maya had the wrong person, or was going crazy and think nothing was wrong.

"I'm so sorry Akari! I knew it was a big secret to you, it just slipped don't hate me!" Maya shouted as soon as I saw her. I rubbed my temples, the headache getting worse. I raised a finger to her mouth, shhh, and then rubbed my eyes. She nodded understanding my headache. It's nice being able to talk to someone without having to speak.

"S-sorry Akari, I honestly didn't mean to say that, you know me I sometimes don't think before I talk. But I will for now on, just please don't hate me." I raised an eye-brow at her.

"Its fine Maya, I guess not everything can be kept a secret forever, hey maybe the nightmares will go away if I talk about it," I had doubt in my voice but it was enough for Maya to grin at me, relief was written all over her face, she hugged me and squeezed tight.

"Thanks Akari." I had no idea for what but I nodded.

Owen sipped his coffee; I just kind of starred at mine. He frowned at me, he knew something was wrong and I was going to have to tell him, I let out a sigh and he put his arm around my shoulder. I rested my head on him, what was I doing, we were just close friends, nothing more. I closed my eyes, I felt safe, safe to sleep, safe to dream and that's exactly what happened.

"Oh, you're awake." I blinked a few times trying to clear my vision, I saw Owen sitting next to me, and we were on a bench that faced the ocean. I must've looked confused because Owen smiled and me and said, "You fell asleep in the inn so I carried you out here; you've been asleep for three hours." I blushed how embarrassing.

"You waited for me, you waited three hours?" I was shocked.

"Well of course, I wasn't going to leave you here alone."

"Why didn't you wake me up then?"

"I don't know, you needed the sleep," he looked out at the ocean and blushed, "You look cute when you sleep." I smiled at him.

"So what happened to your mother?" His face was stern and my heart sank. "You mumbled something about her in your sleep, several times." He locked his eyes with mine; there was no getting around this.

"This day, thirteen years ago, I went to my parents room but the door was cracked and I h-heard them yelling," my voice shaky as I remembered I felt tears swelling in my eyes. "I looked into the room and listened, my parents had gotten into a fight, I don't know what it was about but it was a really bad. Everything was broken and thrown around the room, I watched my d-dad pick up a sharp piece of glass from the floor and stab my mom to death with it," I broke out into tears; Owen wrapped his arms around me. "I was there, Owen! I could've stopped him; I could've jumped in the way and saved her. But I didn't I just stood there and watched. The way he looked so relieved once she stopped moving, once she stopped crying, once she stopped apologizing, once she stopped breathing. He would've killed me next, o how I wish he did. But the neighbors called the police and I was so screwed up that I just ran, I didn't think twice or pack anything. I screamed and started running; he chased me down the street then stopped. He knew I wouldn't tell a soul anyway. After three years of running, I ended up here, I knew if I kept running away I wouldn't live much longer, and this island was so small anyway that if he came searching for me he wouldn't find me. But he's in jail now." Owen looked at me, with pity in his eyes. I was suddenly full of rage and slapped Owen, he just closed his eyes. "Don't just sit there! Do something, smack me back! Don't just sit there!" I started yelling I jumped from the bench. He looked at me, a red blotch from where my hand hit him.

"Akari, calm down! You're not mad at me, you're just mad at yourself," he shouted at me. How dare he, how dare he say what I'm mad at.

"How can you say that?" My voice was full of sobs, it was true. I was mad at myself, I hated myself. I collapsed back on the bench, back into Owen's arms. "Owen, I could've saved her, I could've done something, but I didn't Owen, because I'm a coward, and I hate myself everyday for it." I slowly turned my arm over, revealing scars poking out from under my sleeve. Owen grabbed me, and looked me in the eye.

"Akari, why would you do that to yourself, you are the most amazing thing in the world, you're not a coward anyone would've sat back and watched. You were overwhelmed and didn't understand what was going on, Akari I love you, never think so poorly of yourself." My jaw dropped, he loved me. He leaned his head in and our lips met. I pulled back only for a second then he kissed me again. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I loved him back. When he drew his head back I looked at him tears in my eyes.

"Owen, I love you too." He smiled at me.

"Akari, I'm here, I'm the now, I'm alive, you're mother, she's not but hurting yourself won't bring her back. You shouldn't be stuck in the past, you should be living the now." He leaned in and whispered in my ear, "for me?"

"Owen, you're right, about everything. I've wasted thirteen years of my life, agonizing over my mother's death, if only I could have it back, or even forget it all.

"Love, you can borrow all the time you need from me," he laughed and we kissed again.

"It's your borrowed time that defines me."

Description
Barrowed Time

I looked up at the stars. They gleamed so bright, even for a clear July night they seemed brighter than normal. I listened to the swaying of the trees, how the twisted and weaved through the night breeze. I cleared my mind, easy on a night like this, but hard with such a stabbing memory. I glanced at the dancing willow tree and saw her face in the leaves. I put my attention back to the sky. A tear rolled down my cheek when I remembered star gazing with her when I was still young, she pointed out all the constellations, and then we made our own. I searched the sky, found it; Watchers Time was what we had named it because it looked like an eye at one angle and a clock at another. I remember I had thought it was the coolest thing and she thought that I was the cutest thing for thinking that. It almost like these memories can cancel out the tragedy that happened after; memories are the only thing that keeps me breathing, the only thing keeping her alive, alive in me. I sat up, my cheeks wet with tears, and I could almost hear her calling my name, to come inside because it was late. But I dare not go to bed, the nightmares would be the worst of ever, of course tomorrow was the day, the anniversary.

I walked on the wooden plank floor that lead into the kitchen, a sight I hadn't seen in years, not since I left. I looked up to see them smiling, holding hands. Perfect, nothing could ever go wrong, I remember this day, this was the day, the day that happened thirteen years ago.

"Akari sweetie, good morning, you're up early," mother said with a huge smile on her face.

"Good morning momma and papa! I was too excited to sleep, are we really gonna go on a vacation!" shouted the ever so happy innocent little me from the kitchen table.

"Yes cutie pie, but it's a surprise on where, okay?" The man I refuse to call my father replied. If only I knew then, the monster this man was. I could've expected this could've been ready for the pain, the huge change, and the loss.

"Really? Well is it an amusement park, a tropical island, are we going camping? At least give me a hint, please!" I felt bad because she wouldn't be going anywhere near that and in hours her world was shatter. I turned from the kitchen and walked down the hall again only to see a cracked door, I peeked in to see a shattered mirror and glass spread across the floor, I heard moms voice, though in a way I'd never heard it before, it was full of sorrow and yelling at my father. Then he started yelling back full of rage, I heard my mother's sobbing. I kicked the door open and ran in to grab her before it was too late, as if it would do anything, reverse the past, and make my childhood full of happy memories of my loving family. But no, that would never happen nothing I could do could ever save her. I stopped in my tracks and turned my head, full of fear, I didn't want to be reminded of what I saw through the crack in the door, but of course too late. She was already dead, and him the killer standing over his victim didn't even look sad, or upset, or confused, he looked relieved and that's what bothered me the most. He looked at me, now my invisibleness gone he grabbed my wrist and twisted my arm I yelped in pain and tried to kick him. He gripped tighter digging her finger nails into my flesh. I winced then drove my fist into his face; he lost his grip and staggered back. He picked up one of the glass shards from the floor he pointed it at me then lunged forward. I jumped to the side but the shard sliced through my arm and my blood streamed down my arm. I went to knock the glass from his hand when he tried to stab me with it, but I shot back, a little too far back because I hit a broken window. His twisted smile grew as he jumped at me and pushed me through, time seemed to stop as I fell out the third story window I saw my mom's face full of sadness I could never imagine her having, then bang!

I woke up screaming, again, no surprise it's the fifth time this week, the nightmares the same as always. I stepped out of my bed wiped the sweat of my forehead. After taking a shower and getting dressed I headed out to the town. I didn't feel like talking to anyone or anything I was just waiting for something, looking for someone, but I had no idea what. It's like the feeling in your gut when you know something's going to happen but you have no idea what, where, or when, but you're excited for it. I sat on a bench and cupped my head in my hands. I had a terrible headache, and I was trying not to think, because thinking could make me think of him, him rotting in a cell hundreds of miles away, him who calls himself my loving father, the man who tore my world to pieces and spit it back in my face. I felt a presence next to me and a firm hand on my shoulder; I didn't have to look up to know who it was.

"Akari, what's wrong?" Owen asked with a voice full of concern. I lifted my head to look at him and I gave a weak smile.

"Nothing's wrong, I just didn't sleep well last night," I half lied, the sleeping part was true.

"Oh, is there something you should tell me about, that's keeping you from sleeping, is something bothering you?"

"No, no, it's nothing, I've been up working to late, and that's all." I stood up ending the conversation and grabbed Owen's arm. "Let's go get some coffee." He stood up and we headed into the inn. Maya and Chase looked over at us from behind the counter, "Two coffees" I said and Maya nodded, she nudged Chase and he turned around and began grinding coffee beans.

"So I see you didn't get much sleep, was it the nightmares again-" Maya slapped her hand over her mouth and I glared at her, what an idiot it was supposed to be a secret, she was the only one who knew, I managed to keep it a secret for over ten years and now she spills the beans, great, now Owen was going to mad I lied to him and pry out the truth. Owen raised an eyebrow at me and I smiled a twisted half smile. How could I act natural when I was mad as ever?

"W-what are you talking about Maya?" My voice cracked, wonderful. Maya looked down and scooted her way out of the kitchen, she ran up the stairs, what was she doing? Trying to get away from me, did she think I was going to jump at her and strangle her, or what?
"I'll be right back Owen," I spoke, my voice harsh. I tried to look confused as I walked up the stairs, maybe Owen will think Maya had the wrong person, or was going crazy and think nothing was wrong.

"I'm so sorry Akari! I knew it was a big secret to you, it just slipped don't hate me!" Maya shouted as soon as I saw her. I rubbed my temples, the headache getting worse. I raised a finger to her mouth, shhh, and then rubbed my eyes. She nodded understanding my headache. It's nice being able to talk to someone without having to speak.

"S-sorry Akari, I honestly didn't mean to say that, you know me I sometimes don't think before I talk. But I will for now on, just please don't hate me." I raised an eye-brow at her.

"Its fine Maya, I guess not everything can be kept a secret forever, hey maybe the nightmares will go away if I talk about it," I had doubt in my voice but it was enough for Maya to grin at me, relief was written all over her face, she hugged me and squeezed tight.

"Thanks Akari." I had no idea for what but I nodded.

Owen sipped his coffee; I just kind of starred at mine. He frowned at me, he knew something was wrong and I was going to have to tell him, I let out a sigh and he put his arm around my shoulder. I rested my head on him, what was I doing, we were just close friends, nothing more. I closed my eyes, I felt safe, safe to sleep, safe to dream and that's exactly what happened.

"Oh, you're awake." I blinked a few times trying to clear my vision, I saw Owen sitting next to me, and we were on a bench that faced the ocean. I must've looked confused because Owen smiled and me and said, "You fell asleep in the inn so I carried you out here; you've been asleep for three hours." I blushed how embarrassing.

"You waited for me, you waited three hours?" I was shocked.

"Well of course, I wasn't going to leave you here alone."

"Why didn't you wake me up then?"

"I don't know, you needed the sleep," he looked out at the ocean and blushed, "You look cute when you sleep." I smiled at him.

"So what happened to your mother?" His face was stern and my heart sank. "You mumbled something about her in your sleep, several times." He locked his eyes with mine; there was no getting around this.

"This day, thirteen years ago, I went to my parents room but the door was cracked and I h-heard them yelling," my voice shaky as I remembered I felt tears swelling in my eyes. "I looked into the room and listened, my parents had gotten into a fight, I don't know what it was about but it was a really bad. Everything was broken and thrown around the room, I watched my d-dad pick up a sharp piece of glass from the floor and stab my mom to death with it," I broke out into tears; Owen wrapped his arms around me. "I was there, Owen! I could've stopped him; I could've jumped in the way and saved her. But I didn't I just stood there and watched. The way he looked so relieved once she stopped moving, once she stopped crying, once she stopped apologizing, once she stopped breathing. He would've killed me next, o how I wish he did. But the neighbors called the police and I was so screwed up that I just ran, I didn't think twice or pack anything. I screamed and started running; he chased me down the street then stopped. He knew I wouldn't tell a soul anyway. After three years of running, I ended up here, I knew if I kept running away I wouldn't live much longer, and this island was so small anyway that if he came searching for me he wouldn't find me. But he's in jail now." Owen looked at me, with pity in his eyes. I was suddenly full of rage and slapped Owen, he just closed his eyes. "Don't just sit there! Do something, smack me back! Don't just sit there!" I started yelling I jumped from the bench. He looked at me, a red blotch from where my hand hit him.

"Akari, calm down! You're not mad at me, you're just mad at yourself," he shouted at me. How dare he, how dare he say what I'm mad at.

"How can you say that?" My voice was full of sobs, it was true. I was mad at myself, I hated myself. I collapsed back on the bench, back into Owen's arms. "Owen, I could've saved her, I could've done something, but I didn't Owen, because I'm a coward, and I hate myself everyday for it." I slowly turned my arm over, revealing scars poking out from under my sleeve. Owen grabbed me, and looked me in the eye.

"Akari, why would you do that to yourself, you are the most amazing thing in the world, you're not a coward anyone would've sat back and watched. You were overwhelmed and didn't understand what was going on, Akari I love you, never think so poorly of yourself." My jaw dropped, he loved me. He leaned his head in and our lips met. I pulled back only for a second then he kissed me again. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I loved him back. When he drew his head back I looked at him tears in my eyes.

"Owen, I love you too." He smiled at me.

"Akari, I'm here, I'm the now, I'm alive, you're mother, she's not but hurting yourself won't bring her back. You shouldn't be stuck in the past, you should be living the now." He leaned in and whispered in my ear, "for me?"

"Owen, you're right, about everything. I've wasted thirteen years of my life, agonizing over my mother's death, if only I could have it back, or even forget it all.

"Love, you can borrow all the time you need from me," he laughed and we kissed again.

"It's your borrowed time that defines me."