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Description
- if I still love you?

[updated]

Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to witness some teenage woes. I drew this in tribute to the best part of my year, which at this point in time, has turned into the most difficult. Alright now, either brace yaselves or look away, cos I got a lot on my chest and this is the only safe place to let it out.

My dear Honeydews..
I miss your silly, handsome face and your sweet voice. I miss your laugh, all the nicknames you gave me, our "nighties", and accidentally asking you to marry me twice. At least.
I miss our Spiderman kisses and you bringing me bouquets of tiny gourds, and being the Gorgo to your Leonidas.
I miss all of our VMs and staying up way too late talking to you. I miss that time you accidentally poured your Cheerios into a cup instead of a bowl because it was waaay too early.
I miss that night you got wasted and we had the realest talk we've ever had, and you started calling me by your last name. I miss that night I stayed up to keep you company while you waited for your plane to Botswana.
I miss you trying to beat the minotaur boss on God of War, and you trying to get me to play Dead Space on your PC in the dark, "being engaged to Elsa" when you put on your sister's platinum blonde wig, and waking up to messages from you.
I miss you singing "Happy Birthday" to me waaaay out of tune, six hours early in my time zone. I miss your terrible spelling, your "perfect" timing, and your "dad jokes", and I miss your squinty-eyed smile.
I miss your 'fro, your long hair, your bedhead and hearing you sing to me.
I miss your obsessions with anime and metal music (particularly Amon Amarth), and bribing John Mayer with Lunchables to sing at our wedding. I miss you talking about the kids we were gonna have, even if you were just being silly, and "getting our own place and five thousand ducks", where you'd show up "wearing nothing but mistletoe".. LOL.
I miss your terrible advice, and having to buy you an ice cream because I didn't believe you when you told me you're 6'4", and you painting my fingernails because my hands are too shaky for me to do it myself.
I miss you being silly and quoting Tom and Jerry to me when I "set your soul on fire", and you walking into the staircase because you didn't turn on the lights. I miss hearing you tell stories about your life, watching you practice skateboarding, and you randomly dancing like Michael Jackson in your kitchen.
I miss you accidentally unplugging your alarm clock and making yourself think the world was gonna end, and you being so happy to sing "Bring Me To Life" to me when it came on the radio.
I miss the days and nights I spent with you in that motel, holding your hand when we went out (and you not letting go even though it is potentially the sweatiest thing God ever created), kissing you all night, playing with your hair and stroking your face.
I miss you playing with my hair, taking pictures of me while I slept next to you (even though I hated the photos), hearing you laugh in person, and seeing the way you looked at me. You have gorgeous eyes.
I miss swimming with you past curfew, talking about our old memories together, and how we first met.
I was so proud to have you by my side.
I miss telling you not to call me your wife, but you liking to so much that you did it anyways.
I miss our selfies, "sharing" Chinese food with you, and us being "one soul in two bodies".
I don't know why, but I even miss that you don't like the texture of pineapples. And all this barely scratches the surface.

You were my 3AMs. I miss you. I miss us. I know you think I've been just fine, but I haven't been the same without you. Still, no matter how much it hurts sometimes, I am thankful. There's never been anyone like you in my life. You've been "my boo" since we were around nine years old, way before we confessed, even if it's not always been official. It's not often you get to hear the person you've wanted for that long say that they want you, too. I don't know where we will go from here but I am thankful that even if I never get to again, for a while, I got to call your sweet, beautiful, dorky self mine. But maybe we will get to try again someday.

I know (I might even hope) that you won't read this, but it felt good to get these things out of my head, even though there's so much more I want to say.
I hope you remember our best days, and that you think of me sometimes. God knows I think about you.

Love, your Beans. xx

Cred:

I used some of 's amazing references again as inspiration - Cuddles reference sheet 4

And the added inspiration from some of my favorite songs that remind me of dis boy..
- www.youtube.com/watch?v=fp_qAA…
- www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-j2_G…

Description
- if I still love you?

[updated]

Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to witness some teenage woes. I drew this in tribute to the best part of my year, which at this point in time, has turned into the most difficult. Alright now, either brace yaselves or look away, cos I got a lot on my chest and this is the only safe place to let it out.

My dear Honeydews..
I miss your silly, handsome face and your sweet voice. I miss your laugh, all the nicknames you gave me, our "nighties", and accidentally asking you to marry me twice. At least.
I miss our Spiderman kisses and you bringing me bouquets of tiny gourds, and being the Gorgo to your Leonidas.
I miss all of our VMs and staying up way too late talking to you. I miss that time you accidentally poured your Cheerios into a cup instead of a bowl because it was waaay too early.
I miss that night you got wasted and we had the realest talk we've ever had, and you started calling me by your last name. I miss that night I stayed up to keep you company while you waited for your plane to Botswana.
I miss you trying to beat the minotaur boss on God of War, and you trying to get me to play Dead Space on your PC in the dark, "being engaged to Elsa" when you put on your sister's platinum blonde wig, and waking up to messages from you.
I miss you singing "Happy Birthday" to me waaaay out of tune, six hours early in my time zone. I miss your terrible spelling, your "perfect" timing, and your "dad jokes", and I miss your squinty-eyed smile.
I miss your 'fro, your long hair, your bedhead and hearing you sing to me.
I miss your obsessions with anime and metal music (particularly Amon Amarth), and bribing John Mayer with Lunchables to sing at our wedding. I miss you talking about the kids we were gonna have, even if you were just being silly, and "getting our own place and five thousand ducks", where you'd show up "wearing nothing but mistletoe".. LOL.
I miss your terrible advice, and having to buy you an ice cream because I didn't believe you when you told me you're 6'4", and you painting my fingernails because my hands are too shaky for me to do it myself.
I miss you being silly and quoting Tom and Jerry to me when I "set your soul on fire", and you walking into the staircase because you didn't turn on the lights. I miss hearing you tell stories about your life, watching you practice skateboarding, and you randomly dancing like Michael Jackson in your kitchen.
I miss you accidentally unplugging your alarm clock and making yourself think the world was gonna end, and you being so happy to sing "Bring Me To Life" to me when it came on the radio.
I miss the days and nights I spent with you in that motel, holding your hand when we went out (and you not letting go even though it is potentially the sweatiest thing God ever created), kissing you all night, playing with your hair and stroking your face.
I miss you playing with my hair, taking pictures of me while I slept next to you (even though I hated the photos), hearing you laugh in person, and seeing the way you looked at me. You have gorgeous eyes.
I miss swimming with you past curfew, talking about our old memories together, and how we first met.
I was so proud to have you by my side.
I miss telling you not to call me your wife, but you liking to so much that you did it anyways.
I miss our selfies, "sharing" Chinese food with you, and us being "one soul in two bodies".
I don't know why, but I even miss that you don't like the texture of pineapples. And all this barely scratches the surface.

You were my 3AMs. I miss you. I miss us. I know you think I've been just fine, but I haven't been the same without you. Still, no matter how much it hurts sometimes, I am thankful. There's never been anyone like you in my life. You've been "my boo" since we were around nine years old, way before we confessed, even if it's not always been official. It's not often you get to hear the person you've wanted for that long say that they want you, too. I don't know where we will go from here but I am thankful that even if I never get to again, for a while, I got to call your sweet, beautiful, dorky self mine. But maybe we will get to try again someday.

I know (I might even hope) that you won't read this, but it felt good to get these things out of my head, even though there's so much more I want to say.
I hope you remember our best days, and that you think of me sometimes. God knows I think about you.

Love, your Beans. xx

Cred:

I used some of 's amazing references again as inspiration - Cuddles reference sheet 4

And the added inspiration from some of my favorite songs that remind me of dis boy..
- www.youtube.com/watch?v=fp_qAA…
- www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-j2_G…