HOME | DD
ThomasInTheClouds — Ode to the Monarch Butterfly -DFC Day 5
Published: 2012-12-05 21:24:22 +0000 UTC; Views: 134; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 1
Redirect to original
Description
Flutter on, crownless king!Manipulated by the August breeze,
Your beauty makes creation sing.
Spiral in air like a master of trapeze
And dare reign forever in your kingdom of sky.
Your decree of simplicity I will abide by.
And dare reign forever.
And dare reign forever.
May your liberty never run dry.
You clothe yourself in robes of royalty,
And sail through skies of blue.
Surely God marks your loyalty
To cascade the mere splendor of you
Throughout an exquisite castle of sunbeams and cloud.
Vow your grandeur to never enshroud.
Throughout an exquisite castle.
Throughout an exquisite castle.
Your subjects marvel and chorus unbowed.
On wings of brilliance you soar.
Your creator must be pleased.
Any whom your loveliness deny, I will wage war
For your majesty cannot be seized.
Watch as the sun bows to your presence.
This throne is crafted of opulent essence.
Watch as the sun bows.
Watch as the sun bows.
Your wings coalesce to create grand luminescence.
Related content
Comments: 10
The break from iambic meter coupled with the big vocubulary made it a little difficult to read but the imagery was beautiful. I like this a lot.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I'm glad you liked it 
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
It can be frustrating when you've hit on the perfect turn of phrase...and then you realize it doesn't stay true to the meter. The same as when you want to use a specific word and you have to restructure the whole line so you can maintain your rhyming scheme. Put the point of iambic meter is to make the poem flow briskly along, directing the reader forward from word to word naturally. I'll be uploading recordings of my poems spoken aloud sometime this week that will give you a feel for how meter works to enhance the readability of a poem.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Thank you! It's my personal favorite as far as DFC goes. And I love the way the form flows, I'll definitely be writing more in Trijan Refrain in the future.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Mine is still the Rubaiyat, but I like this one as well. I hate Sestinas...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I haven't attempted a Rubaiyat yet, but I have written a Sestina… My God, they're difficult. The French antiquity poets must have been incredibly gifted or well versed (or both).
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I did a Sestine last year...based on the board game, "Clue". I just could not think of anything else to do... I also found the Magali Shairi difficult as there really are few examples.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
That sounds interesting, I'll look for it in your gallery. I had to look up the Magali Shairi form, it's day 10 of DFC. It looks odd; I'm not used to shorter forms.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
