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Description
WARNING: This text may have triggers for some people. Read at your own risk.

Sometimes…

Sometimes…Sometimes I feel as if I’m wrapped in chains. Chained in place, to never leave. To never talk to others. Sometimes, when I escape these chains…due to being away for so long, It’s hard to talk to others. I feel as if, if I say the something stupid, or do something even the slightest bit weird..I’ll burst into tears. Sometimes….these chains are broken, and I’m able to leave…I try, TRY to socialize in crowds…but I feel as if I’m being suffocated. Held down. As if, something doesn’t want to let me talk to others. Or leave it’s grasp. Sometimes, when these chains start to feel like home. Like a safe place, but then…I’m always reminded of a life I once had. When I was younger, more free. Free to do as I will, without a care in the world. I didn’t care what people thought of me! I said what I wanted, did what I wanted. Now however, I’m a prisoner in my own home. Crippled by fear. When the chains are lifted, I hesitate to leave their comfort. For in the world outside, things seem bigger. Scarier then they really are. Irrational fears are placed in my head. Every sound, and thought…Scares me, makes me feel jumpy. I sweat, shake, and sometimes even cry..for no reason at all. When I’m out in he world, I constantly want to go back to the chains. The world is like a jungle, noises and sounds so different from home. I feel as if crowds of people are vines….pinning me,wrapping around me strangling me and holding me down. I feel as if I’m being cornered, and stalked by constant predators that want to kill me, hurt me, or do other unspeakable things to me. I feel as if I’m a prisoner in my own mind, which is clouded like the sky on a stormy day. My thoughts, like turbulent waves, thrashing around in my mind, never to leave. These thoughts? “Am I alright? Do i look okay? I’m being stared at, is there something wrong with me? That person there, are they following me? That car, it’s slowing down…should I speed up my walking?” there are various other things that go on through my mind, as I start to panic. I feel the constant searing of eyes, as if they were lightning bolts aimed directly at me setting me on fire. These things…are the reason I rather stay in the comfort of those chains. The chains I call home. And sometimes? I never leave.

I decided that I would write small story…I was feeling a bit stressed and down so I thought I should just vent and write a small story. Any thoughts? I decided to share cus, sharing is cool.

Description
WARNING: This text may have triggers for some people. Read at your own risk.

Sometimes…

Sometimes…Sometimes I feel as if I’m wrapped in chains. Chained in place, to never leave. To never talk to others. Sometimes, when I escape these chains…due to being away for so long, It’s hard to talk to others. I feel as if, if I say the something stupid, or do something even the slightest bit weird..I’ll burst into tears. Sometimes….these chains are broken, and I’m able to leave…I try, TRY to socialize in crowds…but I feel as if I’m being suffocated. Held down. As if, something doesn’t want to let me talk to others. Or leave it’s grasp. Sometimes, when these chains start to feel like home. Like a safe place, but then…I’m always reminded of a life I once had. When I was younger, more free. Free to do as I will, without a care in the world. I didn’t care what people thought of me! I said what I wanted, did what I wanted. Now however, I’m a prisoner in my own home. Crippled by fear. When the chains are lifted, I hesitate to leave their comfort. For in the world outside, things seem bigger. Scarier then they really are. Irrational fears are placed in my head. Every sound, and thought…Scares me, makes me feel jumpy. I sweat, shake, and sometimes even cry..for no reason at all. When I’m out in he world, I constantly want to go back to the chains. The world is like a jungle, noises and sounds so different from home. I feel as if crowds of people are vines….pinning me,wrapping around me strangling me and holding me down. I feel as if I’m being cornered, and stalked by constant predators that want to kill me, hurt me, or do other unspeakable things to me. I feel as if I’m a prisoner in my own mind, which is clouded like the sky on a stormy day. My thoughts, like turbulent waves, thrashing around in my mind, never to leave. These thoughts? “Am I alright? Do i look okay? I’m being stared at, is there something wrong with me? That person there, are they following me? That car, it’s slowing down…should I speed up my walking?” there are various other things that go on through my mind, as I start to panic. I feel the constant searing of eyes, as if they were lightning bolts aimed directly at me setting me on fire. These things…are the reason I rather stay in the comfort of those chains. The chains I call home. And sometimes? I never leave.

I decided that I would write small story…I was feeling a bit stressed and down so I thought I should just vent and write a small story. Any thoughts? I decided to share cus, sharing is cool.