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TrappedInABucket In reply to KittieBases [2018-09-16 02:12:57 +0000 UTC]

I am a very masculine boy with a above average long dick. 

Thank you very much. 

...

Actually my wrists are kind of small... and I'm so skinny I have an hour glass figure... and my shoulder's aren't very wide either. 

I have very nice legs too. 

Oh my god. 

Ok now I have another reason to cry tonight. Thank you.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 02:01:27 +0000 UTC]

Well, I'm trapped here in the sense where I can't leave. I'm not allowed to leave the property at all. That's pretty trappy to me.

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KanzenTheDragon In reply to TrappedInABucket [2018-09-16 02:04:21 +0000 UTC]

If you think of it as trapped you're going to make yourself feel worse.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 02:21:11 +0000 UTC]

I would like to see my best friend once in a while, ok? And if it wasn't for this phone that I snuck in, I wouldn't even be able to contact you or her. It doesn't really matter about my mind set, this is by definition a trap. A good trap, but a trap that is isolating me from the very few people I love. 

God fucking damn I miss Jamie so fucking much. 

All I want to do is see him and Safara, and I ask the front desk if I'm allowed to take visitors but I'm not because I haven't been here long enough and they say I haven't made enough progress to see them yet.

I fucking hated being at home, and I hate being here too, but damn. At least I was allowed to LEAVE when I wanted too. 

Sorry for the rant. It's just been a stressful day. 

But you know how it is with me.

Everyday is stressful.   

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KanzenTheDragon In reply to TrappedInABucket [2018-09-16 02:58:06 +0000 UTC]

If ranting keeps you from doing something stupid then i really dont care. Rant all you want. They miss you too. Saf won't stop talking about you and James's been in his own boat of emotions.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 03:00:10 +0000 UTC]

I wish I could just shoot myself in the face. It would end their suffering for liking me.

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KanzenTheDragon In reply to TrappedInABucket [2018-09-16 12:01:15 +0000 UTC]

Actually thatd just make them suffer even more and for much much longer. Especially Jamie.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 13:35:32 +0000 UTC]

I've always wanted someone to actually like me for once in my life, and now I have that, but all I seem to do is make that person suffer. I'm so horrible that I can't even make people who like me feel OK with me.

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KanzenTheDragon In reply to TrappedInABucket [2018-09-16 16:13:30 +0000 UTC]

Well according to you, you're actually trying to get better now. So that's one step there.

Unless you're blshitting but I'm giving you benefit of doubt.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 17:07:15 +0000 UTC]

I am, I really am, but it still sucks that I make everybody I meet miserable because my misery is like a contagious disease.

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KanzenTheDragon In reply to TrappedInABucket [2018-09-16 19:37:05 +0000 UTC]

Thing is tho, you can fix it. Just let people who care about you help you and in term you'd be helping them.

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TrappedInABucket In reply to KanzenTheDragon [2018-09-16 19:55:04 +0000 UTC]

I guesssssssssss so.

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