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Stupid leg, just HEAL already!

I'm sorry for not working on art for others, I haven't forgotten about you. I have even started some art pieces already, but I'm just never happy about them and well... I think it's a bad idea to draw art for someone else if you know you're not gonna like it yourself anyway.

Annd below is some vent thing, but you don't need to read or comment if you don't want to. I just want to write stuff down I always make my stories horribly long apparently...

Okay, so.
I've been running since March 2009 now I think. Not running fast, but running longer distances, so a low speed. And I really liked it. It kinda makes the things that make you sad or stress you out fade into the background, you know? And when you have finished your training you have the "I did it" feeling. Plus, it's a sport in which I, for once, don't suck. (I have a motoric disorder thing which means that I'm weak, slow and quite frankly, bad at almost any sport. But apparently not running longer distances, as long as I'm not running too fast.
So this year, I signed up for a running seminar at school. And we had to choose a goal: 10, 15 or 20 kilometers. After a lot of hesitation, I went for 20, which meant that I was going to work hard and participate in the 20 kilometers of Brussels on May 26.
I didn't go.
Because in December, I noticed that when I ran, there was some kind of pressure on my left leg. And as I kept running it grew. Until it actually started to hurt.
So, okay, that can happen, huh. Bought new running shoes to support my feet the best I could, and gave myself a few weeks of rest.
It didn't heal.
Went to the doctor. He said that the problem could be my joints and ligaments: they probably were too weak or something like that and I'd need certain exercises to train them, but we had to let a specialist check it first.
That person didn't even look at my leg - she just looked at my back for one second "Oh dear. That's scoliosis." I got special arch support.
But now, months later. It still hurts when I run. Even with my shoes and support - even now that I don't run at all my leg feels bad.

It's horribly frustrating - I want to start my training again, I want to build up my stamina again since I have zero right now. Sometimes I want to run as fast as I can anyway, just to punish that stupid leg and let it suffer the most horrible pains for not healing - even though I know that's stupid and I'll be the only one feeling pain.
I wanna do something. Have a goal to work for. Do something else than being online all day, even if I have no one to hang out with. I don't even care about running alone or with only adults - people of my age usually decide at some kind of point that I'm nothing interesting anyway. So. I want to get more confidence in myself, feel that I can do something. That I'm good at something.

I just want to run again, but I don't know when (if?) I will be able to again.

Description
Stupid leg, just HEAL already!

I'm sorry for not working on art for others, I haven't forgotten about you. I have even started some art pieces already, but I'm just never happy about them and well... I think it's a bad idea to draw art for someone else if you know you're not gonna like it yourself anyway.

Annd below is some vent thing, but you don't need to read or comment if you don't want to. I just want to write stuff down I always make my stories horribly long apparently...

Okay, so.
I've been running since March 2009 now I think. Not running fast, but running longer distances, so a low speed. And I really liked it. It kinda makes the things that make you sad or stress you out fade into the background, you know? And when you have finished your training you have the "I did it" feeling. Plus, it's a sport in which I, for once, don't suck. (I have a motoric disorder thing which means that I'm weak, slow and quite frankly, bad at almost any sport. But apparently not running longer distances, as long as I'm not running too fast.
So this year, I signed up for a running seminar at school. And we had to choose a goal: 10, 15 or 20 kilometers. After a lot of hesitation, I went for 20, which meant that I was going to work hard and participate in the 20 kilometers of Brussels on May 26.
I didn't go.
Because in December, I noticed that when I ran, there was some kind of pressure on my left leg. And as I kept running it grew. Until it actually started to hurt.
So, okay, that can happen, huh. Bought new running shoes to support my feet the best I could, and gave myself a few weeks of rest.
It didn't heal.
Went to the doctor. He said that the problem could be my joints and ligaments: they probably were too weak or something like that and I'd need certain exercises to train them, but we had to let a specialist check it first.
That person didn't even look at my leg - she just looked at my back for one second "Oh dear. That's scoliosis." I got special arch support.
But now, months later. It still hurts when I run. Even with my shoes and support - even now that I don't run at all my leg feels bad.

It's horribly frustrating - I want to start my training again, I want to build up my stamina again since I have zero right now. Sometimes I want to run as fast as I can anyway, just to punish that stupid leg and let it suffer the most horrible pains for not healing - even though I know that's stupid and I'll be the only one feeling pain.
I wanna do something. Have a goal to work for. Do something else than being online all day, even if I have no one to hang out with. I don't even care about running alone or with only adults - people of my age usually decide at some kind of point that I'm nothing interesting anyway. So. I want to get more confidence in myself, feel that I can do something. That I'm good at something.

I just want to run again, but I don't know when (if?) I will be able to again.