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wynderkind — The Horror of Rule 34
Published: 2011-01-30 07:08:30 +0000 UTC; Views: 4723; Favourites: 18; Downloads: 70
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Wesker: Why do you keep playing with this stupid program?Me: Oh, you mean XNA Lara? It's pretty fun.
Wesker: Hmph.
Me: I'm not the only one! Lots of people use it. Here let me show you. *searches on DA* See, look. Oh, hey, there's a picture of you and... oh no...
Wesker: Oh my God. Is that... Jill? Naked? With me? What the hell?
Me: Um, oops... nevermind that-
Wesker: *squints, then reels back in terror* Me with Excella? Me with CLAIRE? WHAT IS GOING ON?
Me: Eh, nothing... it's nothing...
Wesker: Nothing? You call THIS nothing? People are posing me in... in... provocative positions!
Me: Like the one with the blowjob...
Wesker: WHAT?!?
Me: Look, calm down! It's just Rule 34. It happens, okay?
Wesker: *points at thumbnails, hand trembling* This... this... What is Rule 34?
Me: *sigh* If it exists, there is porn of it.
Wesker: But that's not fair! Don't I get a say in this?
Me: *chuckles* You're a fictional character, dear. Look, I don't care for it either but people can make what they want. Especially fangirls and fanboys. And your fangirls, sir, are insatiable.
Wesker: Just... just promise me you won't do this.
Me: *nervous laugh* Uh, too late for that-
Wesker: *disbelief, then rage* HOW COULD YOU?!
Me: *shrinks back* I'm sorry! I'm sorry! At least I didn't post it online!
Wesker: *anger subsides* Fair enough...
Me: *relieved sigh*
Wesker: ... Okay, show me.
Me: What?
Wesker: You heard me. I want to see.
Me: *gulp* Uhm, okay... fine. *opens folder* Here.
Wesker: *looks* ...........
Me: ..........
Wesker: *eyes open wide* WHAT IS THAT DEMON DOING TO ME WITH HER TAIL?!?!? Why you-
Me: *shrieks and runs off* I'M SORRY!!!
Wesker: GET BACK HERE!!! *gives chase*
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Comments: 34
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
I don't think I want the answer to the question Wesker asks... it sounds so perverted and just wrong. On another note- HOW DARE YOU VIOLATE HIS IMMENSE AWESOMENESS!!?? That is cruel. And what's wrong with fangirls? Anyways, the pic and story are hilarious, you definitely should keep messing around with him and that program.[link]
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
He'll get over it... some day XD
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Hehe Not if he see's the newest Fanpic's going up these days XD
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Wesker: WHAT? FFFFFFFFF-
Me: *clamps hand over his mouth* XD
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*laughs evilly* .....Face it wesker huni.....we love you *cough* In compromising positions XD
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XDDD So true!
If all these characters were to see what people were doing to them. They would make this face.
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ROFLMAO!!! I just read all the comments bellow.
Poor Wesker. He's nothing but a toy now.
👍: 1 ⏩: 1
LMAO I am glad you are thoroughly amused
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Yep. 
And if it serves as a relief to wesker. I don't use him in such ways.
But Kennedy...well I already made him gay. XD
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Wait till you see what I am about to upload...
Wesker will be most displeased with me!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Hah! Poor Wesker, still he'll just have to learn to live with it, I guesss. Or accept and go along with the ride
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Me: Oh, don't worry, he'll be fi-
Wesker: YOU! *glares at you* You're the one who is drawing me as a WOMAN, aren't you? Why, I ought to-
Me: *tackles him*
Wesker: Get OFF of me, you cretin!
Me: *ties him up and gags him*
Wesker: *struggles* Mmmfff? MMMFFF!
Me: That should keep him quiet for a bit. *evil grin*
👍: 1 ⏩: 1
Thanks for the save! Much appreciated! I can't help it if she's popular. By the way, while Wesker's tied up, can I borrow him?
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Me: Sure!
Wesker: Mmmppphhh! *struggles, spits the gag out* I WILL NOT BE TREATED LIKE THIS!
Me: *duct tapes his mouth* I told you before, dear. You're a fictional character - you don't have rights. *hands him over to you*
Wesker: *sighs heavily, reluctantly remaining passive... for now*
^_^
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Raax: Thanks! Now I'm not sure what to do with him.
(Sits Wesker on the sofa)
Raax: Soooo.... would you like a cup of tea? I'll put the kettle on. How's about we watch Doctor Who? I'm sure you'll like it.
Wesker: *evil glare of death*
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Me: Actually, I have a fun idea. Why don't we give you the perfect reference for your drawings? *pulls out syringe* You've heard of the G-virus... well, THIS is the GB-virus!
Wesker: *squirms violently, falling off of the sofa onto the floor, frantically trying to crawl away*
Me: Oh, come now. You know fighting it is futile. *kneels over him* Let's see here. Is this one of those injections you have to get in the butt?
Wesker: *eyes burn with loathing... and a hint of fear*
Me: Hm, probably not. *sticks it in his arm*
Wesker: *writhes on the floor as the virus takes effect, flesh begins to shift and reconfigure*
Me: Well, that's something you don't see everyday, eh?
Wesker: *the changes finish, but 'her' form is now smaller and 'she' easily wrenches free of the ropes and rips the duct tape off* YOU-! *gasps* My... my voice! *looks down* What... what have you DONE to me? I'm... I'm... *feels body*
Me: A girl?
Wesker: *moans in despair, sliding to the floor in defeat*
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
lol, now THAT is amazing. You have made an awesome discovery- A new virus! Hehehe... now, if we could only do that to Chris... Lol, though that kind of would suck. I like him as a guy much better...
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Oh Wesker, we love ya, but the ladies demand the hotness. XD
👍: 1 ⏩: 1
XD He should be happy to be the object of such... um, adoration.
Wesker: I think the words you're searching for are "unbridled lust"-
Me: Oh, hush.
Wesker: Just a second, isn't this girl one of those shippers?
Me: *nervous* Uh, no, no. that was uh, somebody else.
Wesker: *raises an eyebrow* Though your tone speaks otherwise, I shall take you at your word.
Me: Good boy.
Wesker: *grumble* Don't... talk to me like that. *skulks off*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LMAO! Oh goodness, Wesker. You're just so much fun to mess with. He should be loving all this attention he gets. XD
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Me: Agreed.
Wesker: *sulks*
Me: Look, Al, you should be thrilled. We all think you are a pinnacle of hotness. Besides, we're the only ones who will be giving you any attention anymore after Capcom stupidly decided to kill you off.
Wesker: *snarls* You had to go and bring THAT up, didn't you?
Me: Look on the bright side. In fangirl-land, your afterlife apparently consists of sitting around looking menacing, bitch-slapping Chris, and pimping the RE women.
Wesker: *buries his head in his hands and sighs resignedly* I... I... oh, the hell with it. Fine! Do whatever you want to me-
Me: Oh? *wicked smile* If you insist...
Wesker: *blinks, eyes widen* Wait, what?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
OMG! Wesker, what have you stumbled into?! Oh god, he's asking for it now!
Wesker: No, not another one!
Me: Yes! *evil laughter*
Wesker: What are you doing with that drawing pad?
Me: ...Nothing...Except drawing you and Jill doing naughty things. XD
Wesker: Good lord, you women are relentless! *shakes fist*
Me: I think I'll draw a smexy pic of you cuddling with a pregnant Jill. Wesker as a daddy would be so adoreable. XD
Wesker: ...I have no words to describe that. Other than you are insane.
Me: Thank you! I find it to be charming! Just wait until I start writing! XD
Wesker: *facepalm* I do not want to know...
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ROFLMAO
I'm glad you enjoy this witty banter
I really should get back into writing...
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It's all good. I love doing stuff like that, especially when it involves Wesker. He's just fun to mess with. XD
Oh you should get back into writing. It's definitely a nice way to express yourself. XD
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Oh gawd, the poor thing! I was messing around with trying to make facial expressions on his model (which is really hard because it was rigged badly) and I made this scared face. I thought to myself, what could possibly scare Albert Wesker? Why, Rule 34 could, of course! XNA Lara in the hands of his fangirls makes for... lots of slash.
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