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Description
"I have mental problem after a suicide and I've lived with it for years now. I can't control my emotions and have made a lot of stupid thing. I even hurt the ones I treasure most. Some tell me to go see a doctor but I'm always reluctant to do so. Because... my mental pains help me drawing. All those "brilliant, beautiful and emotional" pieces I made were done when I felt depressed, people notice my faint existence through my drawings... I can't really "draw" when I'm not feeling down. But it's hell for living this way. Yes, my mental pains give me alot and take away from me alot. I hurt the others' feelings. I know it's all because of my problems, I never ever want that to happen. But so what? The fact that I hurt others' feelings will never change. And could they ever forgive me for what I've done?

I isolate myself from people because I don't want to hurt them.
I receive swallow pity from those who I thought they'd understand me.
I pretend nothing happens while I'm desperately screaming for help in the inside.

I've been living in this fucked-up loop as long as I can remember..."

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Hm I woke up in the middle of the night with this sad sad dream. I don't know why but I just have to draw this. It seriously haunts me. And I still can't stop these tears on my face...

Art © Yamazaki-Shyn
Commission info: fav.me/d6yrbt9

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Pixiv | Tumblr | YouTube | Instagram | ask.fm

Description
"I have mental problem after a suicide and I've lived with it for years now. I can't control my emotions and have made a lot of stupid thing. I even hurt the ones I treasure most. Some tell me to go see a doctor but I'm always reluctant to do so. Because... my mental pains help me drawing. All those "brilliant, beautiful and emotional" pieces I made were done when I felt depressed, people notice my faint existence through my drawings... I can't really "draw" when I'm not feeling down. But it's hell for living this way. Yes, my mental pains give me alot and take away from me alot. I hurt the others' feelings. I know it's all because of my problems, I never ever want that to happen. But so what? The fact that I hurt others' feelings will never change. And could they ever forgive me for what I've done?

I isolate myself from people because I don't want to hurt them.
I receive swallow pity from those who I thought they'd understand me.
I pretend nothing happens while I'm desperately screaming for help in the inside.

I've been living in this fucked-up loop as long as I can remember..."

======

Hm I woke up in the middle of the night with this sad sad dream. I don't know why but I just have to draw this. It seriously haunts me. And I still can't stop these tears on my face...

Art © Yamazaki-Shyn
Commission info: fav.me/d6yrbt9

======

Pixiv | Tumblr | YouTube | Instagram | ask.fm